I ran out into the cold winter air, snow flakes falling into my hair. I love you I heard his voice echoing in my head. My body was shaking and I couldnt breath. How could something so wrong feel so right? I questioned myself. Because it's not right, none of this is. My thoughts aren't right, they aren't safe anymore. But if I can't even trust my own mind, then what could I trust? Charming, I could trust Charming. I had always trusted him, but could I now? Now that his feelings clouded his judgement? His feelings... What where does feeling? Was it grief? Was I a rebound or was he really telling the truth? Did he love me? Could someone love a monster like me? I had so many questions in my head, but I didn't have the answer to any of them. It was frustrating, oh so frustrating. I picked up a rock from the snowy ground and threw it away, almost hitting someone on the head. The guy looked up angrily "Sorry!" I shouted at him before turning around and walking back into the restaurant. He was still waiting there, I looked at the clock. My inside ramble had took longer then I expected, almost a hour had past. And Charming still sat there, waiting for me to come back. He looked as if he hadn't moved at all since I left. I walked to him and sat down in front of him, "Did you mean it?" I asked, going straight to the point.
"Yes... I understand if you don't feel the same way, trust me. That's what I expect. I just wanted to know that a part of my will always want our friendship to be more then that. More then a friendship. Because I love you Red and I probably always will. Since the moment I saw you I was stunned by your beauty, then your personality won me over and now I am in love. I am deeply, madly, foolishly in love with you." he replied.
My heart stopped, those words. The last time someone had said them to me, I ended up eating him. I couldn't. I would hurt him, I would never be able to forgive myself. I looked away from his eyes. "I can't Charming" my voice was thick and shaky. I cleared my troath. "We are friends" my voice sounded more steady. "That is all we'll ever be, friends. I don't love you that way, I could never love you that way" my voie sounded colder then I inteded to. He stayed quiet for seconds before I finally looked up. Tears where forming in his beautiful eyes. "I'm sorry..." I said. But he got up and rushed out of grannies in a few big steps. My heart broke into a million little pieces, they stung in my chest. It hurted with every breath I took. I hurt him... A tear rolled down my cheeck as I shakingly got up. I left the dinner through the back door and went to my room. I locked the door behind me and sank down to the ground. I hurt him... No. I protected him. I protected him from the monster I am, it was better hurting him now, now that it wouldn't hurt as much, then hurting him later. Later when he got invested in me. One of us would get hurt. He, because I would lose control over the wolf. Or me, because he would realise he didn't want me. I couldn't risk heart acke for him. I couldn't. Because I knew only one simple truth: No one could love a monster like me.