A huge thank-you to my brilliant beta, HaydenXCharm. Any remaining errors are my own!
Pipeline
It wasn't long until graduation, until prom, until college, or whatever other opportunities lay beyond the barrier of Megamind's high school certificate. Not much time was left until he had one more piece of permanent paperwork; at least this one would open doors for him. He wasn't sure how he felt about becoming a member of society, being part of the crowd. He knew he'd never truly fit in. He'd never have truly equal opportunities open to him. If he were to constantly pursue justice, he would be forever disappointed and exhausted. It was a waste of time.
Even if she didn't pass Calculus, Roxanne had a long career ahead of her, somewhere. She was brilliant. She'd picked up a lot more than she'd thought she would in the last week. She was fantastic. Her future was so bright by comparison, Megamind felt blinded. Of course, that was only fair; it was a reasonable reaction, he'd lived his life in the shadows. When someone like him looked directly into the sunlight, it was sure to sting.
He lay on his back in bed, dehydrating yet another rat, and making a note to add it to the Tupperware container in the corner before the leak in the roof made it humid enough to re-hydrate. His life, honestly. He lived in a dump. He wondered what Roxanne's house was like.
Roxanne was amazing, really. The questions she asked. Metro Dude's parents owned Metro City Prison, the for-profit gifted workshop of criminal genius. She'd figured it out all on her own.
She knew that Metro Dude's father was Megamind's legal guardian, technically, if you went by the books. It made her angry, on his behalf. He wouldn't call her his friend, but there was potential there. A hope he'd thought long crushed swelled in him. It made his eyes feel full and wet. Two friends! Two! Oh wow, he was pathetic.
Exam week was beginning, and they were all on the edge of the event horizon of life. The prison loomed like a black hole, but he'd gained the velocity to escape a black hole once in his life already. He knew the equations, how it all worked. He could do this.
"Minion, let's go on some kind of gap year, just you and me. Let's find a rusty old car, something we like. Let's turn something dead and lifeless into something absolutely incredible."
Minion spun around in his bowl, clapping his hands, the servos whirring and his fingertips cracking together. "Oh, oh! We could explore alternative energy! A silent engine, sir!"
Megamind rubbed his chin. "I had been thinking that, yes. If I could power a tricycle with my binky, just imagine what we could do with a few miles of wire and some elbow grease!"
"Oh, I can Sir. I can!"
Megamind spread his arms out, seeing it in his mind. "The highway stretching out before us. No alarm clocks, no white bread, no peanut butter!"
"No classes!" Minion agreed, in elation.
"No more exams!"
"No more tutoring!"
"Oh," Megamind said. "Yes. No more suffering in the company of those small tiny minds."
This could also mean no more Roxanne. Maybe. He could have hopes, but he wasn't going to let himself fall into any unrealistic fantasies. No, it was for the best that he not make decisions involving her and where she was heading.
"That's the spirit, sir! Bring on exam week!"
It was blissful, really. Everyone else was overtired, stressed, and way too preoccupied with their own pencil cases. Megamind and Minion floated. They sat down, they filled out their papers, they stood up, and they left after the minimum time. The sun was shining outside, and the school grounds were quiet, relaxing. Blissful.
Roxanne found them on the grass, which was... unexpected. She looked exhausted, but she smiled and bumped her shoulder against Megamind's as she sat down with them.
"I'm glad that's over," she said, "and it will never happen again. It's the humanities all the way from here on out!"
Megamind cleared his throat. "Ah, are you sure you're... sitting in the right spot?"
She frowned at him, like she was genuinely confused. It was almost like she was doubting that he wanted her company instead of the other way around. What a ridiculous thought. "What, I can't let my tutor know how I did on my exam?"
"Oh, so that's it. Your tutor, I see." That did make more sense, although the fantasy of having two friends was still floating around in his mind. "I doubt you've got the recall to show me how you actually did, though if you want pointers you can always bring your marked papers..."
She rolled her eyes and threw herself back, so she was lying down. She raised a hand to shade her eyes. "Jeeze. Could you drop the ruse, already? You haven't tried to extort me for any more information on Metro Dude, and I'm done with my exams."
"Ruse?" It was safer to make her say it than to guess and get it wrong.
"We're friends, you idiot." She kicked him in the shins.
He shook his fist at her, and then stared at it like it had acted on its own. "I've never raised my fist in..."
"Joy, sir?"
"Shut up, Minion!"
Roxanne laughed, and she looked so happy there that everything felt like a dream. It had to be a dream. It was unreal. It had been impossible such a short time ago.
"So can we go get some ice-cream, or what? I am sick of this schoolyard." She sounded nonchalant, but a little too relaxed. Her arms were tense, for all that her pose suggested a relaxed young woman at the end of the school year.
"I'm, um… broke," he said, which was a real shame. Roxanne finally wanted to spend time with him and he didn't have the cash for it. It would have been nice to go out somewhere.
"Hello, evil?" She laughed, until she realised he wasn't laughing along. "Oh wow," she said. "The one time I wouldn't care, and you..."
"Sir has to get his academic transcript in order to enroll in college," Minion explained. "They're watching us pretty carefully, given that we're still legally minors. For a while it was touch and go if we'd even get the chance. Well, I don't. Fish. Kind of hard to get that one past an admissions board, but still. Sir is in with a chance!"
Megamind was going to have words with that feckless moron later, words about how embarrassing pity was, especially from someone with a much smaller head and a secure home.
"Okay, so I'll pay. I owe you for all the help you've given me, anyway." Roxanne put a hand in her pocket and then made a strange face. "Er, if I have any of my allowance left. Whoops."
"Whoops? No wonder you're terrible at math, if you can't even keep track of numbers that have a tangible presence."
She shot him a scathing glance that made him feel all of two feet tall, and counted what was in her wallet. "I've got enough. I've just got to make sure I don't go overboard. How's the diner near the bus stop sound?"
She was serious. Roxanne Ritchi was buying him an ice cream. He ducked his head and mumbled "Fine," into his chest, but he was sure she could still see his cheeks turn purplish red as he blushed.
She grabbed his arm, her fingers feeling warm on his skin as she led him along the street. She wasn't ashamed to be seen with him, and that only made him feel better-worse inside. It was a dream, and he'd probably wake up soon. Any moment now.
"Here we are!" Roxanne nodded, and her hair shifted with the motion, so soft and beautiful. She was so different from him, it was hard to believe.
"Sir? Do you like the menu?"
"We've been here a hundred times before, Minion. You know I do."
Roxanne cleared her throat, and Megamind's eyes chased the corner of a smirk as it faded into a kinder smile. She had depths, such potential. She looked out at the world and saw something real, just like he did.
They took their seats, Minion shifting and sliding to fit into the booth. The waitress arrived, looking down at them with a raised eyebrow. Megamind swallowed. There was that look, the one that Roxanne didn't wear around him anymore: judgement and suspicion.
"I'll have a choc-fudge sundae," he said, to get it over with. Oh, how he hated being stared at, like he was some zoo animal.
"Choc-caramel split," Roxanne said.
"Just water for me," Minion said with a smile.
The waitress left with another pointed look, and Roxanne winced. "Ugh, sorry. I didn't know they were that rude, here."
Megamind shrugged. What else could he do? "I come in here often enough, so they're probably just not used to seeing anyone spend time with me. Admit it, when you first met me, it was hard to notice anything but how different I look."
She frowned, but she nodded. "Yeah, I guess so."
"Hey, it's not that bad. I mean, I could be shaped like an inverted triangle and coloured bright orange."
Roxanne stifled a laugh.
"Or, I could have come out all quiet and dweeby."
That had been supposed to make her laugh, but instead she got very serious looking. She reached out, and took Megamind's hand in her own. "No, you couldn't have. I'm glad you're you."
In a film, this would be where the guy and the girl would kiss. However, also, this would be a time when the guy's pet fish wasn't studiously whistling and tapping his robotic gorilla fingers on the tabletop and turning to look out the window.
"Minion, you're embarrassing me!" Megamind kicked at Minion's foot, but Roxanne squeezed his hands, drawing his attention back to her.
"Megamind. I think I've finally found what I want to do in life."
"Journalism?" It was a pretty obvious one, but it never hurt to ask.
"Well, yes. But there's something more important to me... In this room."
Megamind felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. He'd bypassed hope and joy, and gone straight to the sick feeling. Humour. He had to deflect it, somehow. She was setting him up and he knew it. "I didn't know you liked ice cream that much."
"I mean you," she said, an exasperated sigh escaping her lips. "Go to Prom with me."
Minion shrieked, and Megamind pulled his hand back so fast that he knocked his bowl over. With ice-cream melting and dripping off the ends of his fingers, the edge of the table, onto his canvas shoes, he gasped.
Roxanne pressed her hand over her mouth, and let out an undignified squeak of laughter.
"I mean, yes. Yes. Of course I will!" he said breathlessly, before she could change her mind. Oh Roxanne, she really liked him! How could it be?
A few dozen napkins later, and some long pointless conversations that his brain just coasted through, Megamind was saying goodbye to Roxanne, and Minion was shepherding him home. His head was hitting the pillow, but his heart was up in the clouds.
She'd given him her number. She'd asked him to Prom. For once, the future didn't matter so much. He felt this content, utter peace inside. He didn't think he'd ever felt that way before in his life. It's how he imagined it had felt, as a child, to be held in his parents' arms and feel safe.
Just like back home, peace never lasted long in Metro City.
There wasn't much to do after exams, except wander the halls and wait for the school year to be over. The next morning, Megamind was relaxed and off-guard. Roxanne waved and came over to him, the breeze brushed gently through the trees, it was picture perfect. She smiled at him, and punched him in the shoulder. He watched her walk ahead a little, rubbing at the spot. He hoped he'd bruise, so he could remember that moment for a while. Even the looming doors of Metro High couldn't spoil his morning.
But then, Metro Dude stepped out from behind them. He had his arms crossed, and he walked past Roxanne without looking at her, grabbing Megamind's shirt roughly. "What the hell have you done to brainwash Roxie?"
"Her name's Roxanne," Megamind hissed through his teeth. He could feel his feet leave the ground. Well, crap. Why did he have to be so gangly and thin?
"Metro Dude! Look, I told you, I can't go with you because I've already got a date. Just let it go!" Roxanne shouted, beating her fists against his back.
Metro Dude laughed. "Yeah, right. Look, Roxanne. I'm not blind, and neither are you. For you to want to date this guy, he has to have done something to mess with your head. I mean, look at him!"
Megamind curled his hand into a fist. He looked everywhere for Minion, but with the way Metro Dude was punctuating every word by shaking him, that was a little hard. All he could do was hang there and try not to bite his tongue as his teeth rattled together.
"How dare you?! Put him down this instant!" she demanded.
"Oh, I'll put him down. But first, I'll take him on a nice cozy flight up to the third floor."
"You wouldn't dare," Roxanne said, mortified.
Roxanne was angry, and on Megamind's behalf. He hung from Metro Dude's fist, throat mostly tight from the choke-hold, but partly from emotion. No one had ever stood up for him. Aside from Minion, nobody had ever defended him. It felt amazing for a moment, until what happened next changed everything.
Roxanne threw herself at Metro Dude, fist clenched, and Megamind closed his eyes. The fool was going to break her hand, and for what?
Megamind felt himself swung through the air, and heard a sickening crunch. His head spinning, he pushed himself off the ground, and moved towards where he'd seen her last. He fought to focus his eyes on Roxanne's prone body. She was splayed on the grass, a bruise already starting to form on her cheek. Oh no, everything was going wrong. Metro Dude had really hit her.
Metro Dude ran over, kneeling to gather Roxanne in his arms. He was shaking. Megamind had half a mind to give him something to really shake about. Struggling to get up, he grit his teeth as he saw Metro Dude touching Roxanne like he had a right to, even after he'd hurt her like that.
Metro Dude swallowed tightly and cast his eyes around. A few of their classmates had been milling around, and they were all paying attention now that something had really gone down. Megamind recognized the look in his eyes, having felt the sickening fear before himself. Metro Dude felt cornered.
"She! I! He made me do it!" Metro Dude spluttered, and it was obviously a poor excuse, but already kids around them were nodding their heads. Teachers spewed out of the building.
People around them were whispering, "He did do it. He's always causing trouble. We saw him. Metro Dude was just trying to help her."
He'd been planning on trying a suit on that night. It wouldn't hurt, to be ready for Prom. But black or orange, in the end, money and fame and power were everything. Poverty and homelessness were nothing. They made you disappear. Talk about the prison to school to prison pipeline.