Kate was frying bacon in a, frankly, unsafe kitchen while Clint attempted to brush dust from his furniture to the floor without coughing. The dog was betraying him though, spluttering in a corner.
"Will you shut up?" he hissed, as he threw open the curtains and got a facefull, then pushed his window open and tried to waft some dust out.
"Is that dog okay?" she asked, leaning through the partition into the living room and squinting through the haze caused by dust when the light hits it.
"He's fine, he's just whining."
"Do you have a hoover?"
"Uh, maybe. I dunno. I've been away for a while. Saving the world. Which no one cares about."
Kate pouted.
"Ohh, it's all so unfair, huh?"
"Damn right is it. I could help train the new recruits. That new girl is hot."
Kate rolled her eyes.
"Maybe that's why you're not allowed. Saving the integrity of a grieving woman."
"I wouldn't do anything. I'm off the market now, apparently. Everyone knows I have a family."
Kate looked around.
"Do you?"
"No!"
The dog had decided it liked the smells coming from the kitchen, and wandered in to sit beside Kate, wagging his tail. She smiled at him, watching Clint trying to clean up the dust with a dustpan and brush.
He managed to fill the dustpan, then realised he didn't have a bin, so threw it out of the open window.
"That's better. Hey, I thought I had a family with the Avengers, but Coulson's lying about shit, Fury's lying about shit, Nat is trying to shag Banner. I mean, what the fuck? The Hulk? Why?"
"Maybe she just really likes him?"
"The Hulk though?"
"Stop being jealous."
"Uh, I'm not. I don't fancy her any more than I fancy anyone else."
"Which means you do."
"She's moping because she's failed to shag the Hulk and now she's crawling up Cap's arse while training a menagerie of witchcraft and Stark's made creations and I get to miss out on all the fun because I'm meant to be with my family. WHO DON'T EXIST!"
Kate rolled her eyes as she put the bacon into buns and then poured coffee into the two cleanest mugs she could find after cleaning them out.
"Well, you've got us."
"Huh?"
"Me and the dog. What's his name by the way?"
"Pizza."
She glanced up, confused, and he shrugged.
"He really likes pizza."
"O…kay. Well then we can be your replacement family."
She handed him a sandwich, and he accepted it.
"I don't even know who you are. This could be poison."
"But you're eating it anyway?"
He shrugged again, and sat down on the sofa.
"Dusts mostly gone."
"Out the window."
"Feel free to sit down."
Kate sat down on the other end of the sofa, and the dog jumped up between them. They ate in awkward silence, with the only sound being Clint's phone buzzing somewhere.
"You gonna get that?"
"Nope. Don't even know where it is."
Kate's phone rang, and she answered it.
"Yes, I'm with him. Coulson wants to talk to him."
"Coulson can go fuck himself."
"I don't think he wants to talk to you. Alright. I'll tell him. Bye."
Kate put the phone back in her pocket, and took a gulp of coffee.
"He said you need to grow up."
"He needs to grow back alive. Motherfucker."
"That doesn't actually make any sense."
"Yeah. Well. Are you gonna tell me why you're here?"