A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)
minerbuilder12-I'm glad you like my story!:)
KarltheWizard-Thank you!:) I'm glad you like the way I've been writing Elsa and Anna.:) Elsa especially makes me happy. She's one of those characters that seems like they're fragile, but they're really strong as steel if you really think about it. Come on, how many people would be in Elsa's spot and not completely break down or turn into a villain? Sure, Elsa gets upset easily, and she can be pushed over the edge (like during the attack on the ice palace); but I think she's secretly tough as nails. I love Elsa's character. Elsa is awesome.:) I shall shut up with fangirling over Queen Elsa of Arendelle now.:P Thank you for liking my story!
CieloFede-Lol, she really should...I thought that was funny...Elsa TOTALLY should freeze him solid.;)
Frozen789-Lol, I would Thank you!:) Don't worry; there's more stories coming from me after this one if you're interested.:) I have lots of ideas.;)
Fatten Saad-Thank you!:) I'm glad you liked it.:) Sorry, I'm not writing a chapter on Anna and Kristoff getting married (they aren't even engaged yet in my mind); HOWEVER, I'll make sure they announce their engagement in the sequel to 'Adventures of Elsa & Anna'. How's that?:)
On to the story!:) {OKAY, I LIED; THIS IS ACTUALLY THE SECOND-TO-LAST CHAPTER! Not the last one.:)}
Breakfast in the dining hall downstairs with so many guests still present was an all-new experience for Elsa, especially when it seemed like everyone wanted to talk to her. She knew she was supposed to sit at the head of the table, so she purposely made sure Anna sat on the right and her cousin Rapunzel on the left. I think I can talk best to my own family. Come on, Elsa, no stuttering now, okay? And don't talk unless you have to. That should help. Elsa let all the other guests sit wherever they wanted. She clasped her hands together under the table, feeling ice not quite forming on her fingertips, but almost. Calm down, Elsa. You can't lose control in here.
Anna gently kicked Elsa under the table and gave her a reassuring smile. You'll be fine, Elsa. She closed her eyes and mimed taking a deep breath.
Elsa smiled a bit and nodded almost imperceptibly at her sister. Thanks, Anna. I know you're right. Deep breaths help. She jumped when she realized Rapunzel was talking to her. "I'm sorry, can you…" Pause. Slow down. Relax. "Could you repeat that…please?" Elsa asked.
"Sure! I just said your magic is really cool. In both ways-you know, like temperature-wise, and the other kind of cool, too," Rapunzel said. "What's the trick for controlling it? You're obviously lots happier and you aren't wearing gloves anymore."
"Thank you." Rapunzel likes my powers, too! Elsa thought happily. "And it's love. But I have t-to be happy at the same time. I think." Relax, Elsa. You stuttered a little bit that time.
"Tell Miss Icy there she should show everyone in here a controlled bit of what she can do," said Eugene, who was sitting next to Rapunzel.
"Eugene! Ru-ude!" Rapunzel hissed quietly. "Miss Icy indeed! Call her Queen Elsa unless she says otherwise."
"Call Elsa the Snow Queen," Anna suggested from across the table. "'Cause that's what she is."
Elsa's cheeks grew pink, but she didn't deny either nickname. I don't mind those names. Those aren't mean things like 'monster' or something else like that. "I wouldn't mind showing j-just the three of you a 'controlled bit of what I c-can do'," she replied finally. I don't feel comfortable enough to do that in public…I might mess up…
"Castle gardens after breakfast?" Anna offered.
Elsa shook her head regretfully. "I have to take c-care of something first." I have to talk to that stupid Hans… "But afterwards I'd love t-to."
"Let's say noon then," Anna decided. She didn't care what Elsa was doing; she couldn't wait to spend time with her cousin and watch her big sister show off her powers.
Elsa smiled and nodded.
"Queen Elsa, what is your stance on using those strong powers of yours to expand Arendelle's borders?" a dignitary from farther down the table called a few minutes later.
Elsa was so shocked she accidentally iced over her spoon and dropped it on the floor. Calm down, Elsa! Conceal, don't feel. You can't lose control in here. Wait and excuse yourself to let the ice out. "I shall not be fancying m-myself the next Napoleon, if that is…your meaning," she replied. I can barely keep my powers under control and people think I'm going to use them as an offense mechanism to increase Arendelle's power?! Great. I know I would use them to defend my country if need be, but that's it.
"Are your powers the reason the gates were shut for all those years?" someone else asked.
What do you think?! Duh. "It certainly wasn't…because I love isolation," Elsa said shortly. I hate it. I like being by myself sometimes, yes, but being locked in my room terrified of losing control and hurting people, NO. She suddenly realized she was making the temperature in the room drop-thank goodness she could feel temperatures now or she wouldn't have known at all-and tried her best to calm down and return the temperature to normal. It's not working! I know it's not!
Anna quickly realized what was going on and purposely leaned toward her sister. "Elsa, just relax. Breathe. 'Scuse yourself from the room if you need to," she whispered. "And don't put your gloves on," Anna added when she noticed what Elsa was about to do.
Elsa stuffed her gloves back in her pocket and clasped her hands together under the table. I'm not hungry anymore. I just want to get out of here. Conceal, don't feel. I can't lose control in here.
"Will you be giving everyone some warning next time before the whole kingdom is frozen?"
"I promise that will not…be happening…again," Elsa said firmly. Careful not to reveal that she was feeling all nervous and squirmy inside, she pushed away from the table and stood up. "Do excuse me." It's going to leak out again. Go away, ice. At least for a few minutes. Please?
Elsa managed to make it inside the kitchen and shut the door before the ice finally made her lose control. Frost spread in a snowflake pattern all over the door where Elsa had her hand pressed against it. Calm down, Elsa. Or you will be freezing all of Arendelle again. She shrank back against the wall when she realized she wasn't the only person in the kitchen. There was Gerda and another servant who Elsa honestly didn't recognize there too. "I'm sorry; I'll j-just…go s-somewhere else…" she stammered. Great job, Elsa. It doesn't matter if Gerda sees you mess up, but it does if anyone else does…
"Gerda, I told you she was going to lose control again!" the servant Elsa didn't recognize half-whispered.
"Be quiet. You're lucky Queen Elsa hasn't fired you yet," Gerda said.
Elsa frowned. "Why would I f-fire her?" she asked in confusion. That was a legitimate suspicion after all, even if it does…hurt a little…
"That Prince Hans hired her, that's why," Gerda told her. "He brought her with him from the Southern Isles."
I can't let her stay on the castle staff if that's the case. Hans was probably trying to undermine me from the inside somehow… "I will pay you for y-your time you've worked, but y-you must return to the Southern Isles w-with Hans," Elsa decided. She sent a look at Gerda that said Get her out of here, and Gerda sent Hans's servant out with another platter of breakfast pancakes.
"Thank you," Elsa said gratefully the moment the kitchen door was shut again. "I'm sorry I c-came darting in here l-like that…"
"Queen Elsa, don't apologize for that. You're perfectly fine. Is it wrong to guess something happened in the dining hall?" Gerda asked, nodding at the frosted over door behind Elsa.
"Someone asked me if I p-planned to give a warning n-next time I froze everything," Elsa said softly. "I said that w-wasn't going to happen a-again, but I got all s-squirmy inside…I had to get out of th-there…" And I lost control and iced the kitchen door. Elsa clasped her hands together close against her chest. "And c-can you please just c-call me just plain 'Elsa'?"
Gerda just pointed at the hot oven. "Freeze the oven, Miss Elsa. Then thaw it. You know how to do that now."
She wants me to do what?! Although isn't letting the ice out what helped before… Elsa bit her lip as she slowly walked over to the oven. She was just reaching a hand out to touch it when
"Queen Elsa, no, don't touch that!" Gerda exclaimed.
Elsa tilted her head to one side, thinking. Why not? Oh…I guess I might get burned if I touch it since I can feel heat now. Right? She shrugged and just began shooting ice into the oven. A moment later, the oven went cold, and Elsa smiled and managed to thaw it completely. It makes me feel all happy inside to actually be able to do that, she thought. "Thank you…"
"Do you feel better now?"
"Yeah…I mean yes," Elsa corrected herself. "I'm still not…not c-completely fixed…I just…I don't know…" I'm okay right now and I'm lots better, but it's not 'instinctive' that my powers stay under control like when I was little, either. I have to really think about it and concentrate. But that's okay-I have Anna back, and she doesn't mind me.
"I don't want to hear anything about you needing to be 'fixed', Miss Elsa, because it's not true. You might still need a little time to heal inside, but there is nothing wrong with you. Everyone still welcomes you on the throne," Gerda said firmly.
"Prince Hans a-and the Duke of Weas-Weselton don't," Elsa muttered to herself. Although Gerda does have a point…nobody acted like they hated me or didn't want me around when Anna and I walked back to the castle yesterday. Well, except for a very few people, and that's not reason for me to get upset. "Gerda, are you the one that l-left that note for me in the…dungeon?" she asked. I'm almost a hundred percent sure it was, but I want to know for sure… "If so, I just w-wanted to say thank you…" Someone still cared what happened to me even after all the mess I made…
"Yes, it was! Queen Elsa, that Prince Hans of the Southern Isles brought you back to the castle tied up and unconscious. When I tried to carry you upstairs to your room, he insisted that you be put in the dungeon instead. Since your sister left him in charge, nobody could go against his wishes. So I took you down there myself and left that note in the hopes that you would find it when you woke up…Evidently you did, thank goodness…"
"I hate Hans," Elsa said aloud, assuming she was just thinking to herself. "Did anyone…come in m-my cell while I was knocked out?" she asked.
Gerda chuckled at Elsa's 'I hate Hans' comment. "You speak for all of us when you say you 'hate Hans', my queen. And no, no one went in that cell at all except Hans, and you were already awake by then. Unless you count me actually putting you in there, that is."
Elsa blushed when she realized she had spoken her opinion of Hans aloud; then sighed in relief at the knowledge that no, no one had come in her cell while she was unconscious. Thank goodness. That would have creeped me out if someone had come in there… "Just you?" she asked, wanting reassurance of the fact.
"Yes, Miss Elsa, only me," Gerda repeated firmly.
"Thank you for taking c-care of me," Elsa said quietly. "I don't m-mean just now-I mean all the years s-since I was little, too…" Gerda has always been the one grownup who knew about my powers and didn't treat me like…like some defective thing that's less than human or something. Kai was nice to me too, but I never really had much contact with him, either.
"Taking care of you is what your old servant is supposed to do. No need for thanks."
Elsa smiled a bit, but she didn't say anything. You could have let Hans do any old thing with me, but you stood up for me instead, authority or no. Elsa jumped when she heard clattering from the other side of the kitchen. "What is that?!"
Olaf came waddling out of a cabinet with chocolate all over his snowy mouth. "Oops. This castle has yummy chocolate in it!"
Elsa clapped a hand over her mouth. "Olaf! You…you got into the chocolate! Gerda, I'm…I'm sorry-I-I didn't know he was in here!"
"Is your little snowman really alive, Queen Elsa? He's cute, but evidently very messy," Gerda said, glancing at the chocolaty mess Olaf had made inside the cabinet.
"Yes, but I'm n-not even quite sure how I did it…" I can make sentient life…I need to make sure I don't do that unwittingly. That would be creepy… Elsa glanced down at her hands; then knelt down and picked up Olaf. "Olaf, you can't make messes in the kitchen. Gerda w-will end up having to clean up the m-mess you made. Do you think you c-can help clean up the mess?"
Olaf just gave Elsa a hug. "You made me to like warm hugs, so you must like 'em too! We gotta make up for all the missing hugs since you were little!" Then he added, "Is the lady your friend? Is she nice? Or is she a creepo like the bad man that left Anna in the library?"
Elsa's eyes suddenly filled with tears at Olaf's missing hugs comment, but she didn't try to force herself to stop as she usually did. I must have given Olaf knowledge of…past me or something, or he wouldn't even know what happened. And I do like hugs; I'm just still a bit hesitant to let anyone give me a hug, let alone me hug someone else, unless it's Anna. And Olaf and Marshmallow, of course. I wonder what happened to Marshmallow… "That lady is nice, and she is my friend." Are you my friend? Sort of? Elsa looked up at Gerda, who just smiled at her. "So please listen t-to her, okay?" And that stupid Hans left Anna in the library…what does that mean? Did he lock her in there?
"Ok! I will clean up allll the mess myself! Elsa…why are you crying?" Olaf asked.
"I don't know…I'm fine." Elsa brushed her tears away and smiled at Olaf. I really am fine. I can take care of things myself now.
"Gerda, I need to go t-talk to Prince Hans of the Southern Isles."
Fifteen minutes later, Elsa sat on her throne in the Great Hall with a certain Southern Isles prince standing in front of her. Elicit calm, Elsa. You can do this. Don't break down, no matter what. Stay in control. "You may leave now. Thank y-you," she told the two guards that had brought Hans to the Great Hall from the dungeon.
"Are you certain you wish to be left alone with this particular prisoner, Queen Elsa?" one of the guards asked.
"Quite. I d-do have certain defense mechanisms" Elsa sent Hans a pointed glare, "that I will n-not hesitate to use this time."
The guard nodded and left the room, looking rather pleased at Elsa's reaction.
Elsa turned her focus back on Hans. Stay in control. Stay in control. A swirling blue glow appeared in her hand, and she held it out in Hans's direction. "I am not that broken g-girl you tried to assassinate out on the fjord. You will not try a-anything on me, or you will have to d-deal with that." Elsa gestured at the sparkling blue glowing thing her magic was making, which quite honestly would have been pretty if she hadn't been threatening certain creeps with it. "Understood?"
Hans just stared sullenly at her. "You aren't going to do anything to me. Not after your reaction to that stunt you pulled at that thing you made on the North Mountain."
Control it. Don't conceal it. Control it. Elsa closed her eyes, and an instant later, the blue glow had disappeared and Hans's feet were frozen to the floor. Okay, I actually did it. "There is an unlimited s-supply where that came from. That 'thing I made' is my i-ice palace, which you attacked. I must give m-my thanks for stopping me from k-killing those intruders, but-"
"Oh, so you admit you were in the wrong," Hans interrupted. "Monsters killing monsters, eh?"
Elsa's expression twisted as if she were in pain for a moment; but then her blue eyes flashed and she strode right over to Hans and stared him right in the face, not caring that she was the shorter of the two of them. You're trying to break me. I'm not letting you do that to me again. I don't know whether it would have been right for me to kill those intruders or not, but that's for me to judge, not you. I'm not the one that tried to kill someone who tried to ask her attackers to stop first. That I do know. "You will respect me. You don't have t-to like me, but you will not c-call me names in my own home. Now shut y-your snarky mouth and answer m-my questions." She abruptly turned away and marched back up onto the throne dais. "And nothing more!" she added firmly.
"What's wrong with you?"
Elsa frowned. "What is that supposed t-to mean?" Elsa, why did you say that?! That's what he wanted you to say. You just gave him a free invite to pick on you. Stupid.
"You're stuttering every other word you say. Are you nervous?"
"I am not. You are s-succeeding only in making m-me angry," Elsa almost spat. I hate this. Why can't I just talk right?! All me stuttering is doing is giving him more ammunition to try to bother me with.
"You probably have PTSD or something."
What is that anyway? I've never even heard of it. "I d-don't even know what that is, and I don't care. You are g-going to answer my questions now," Elsa replied.
"Post traumatic stress disorder…"
Elsa figuratively froze for a moment, looking down at the floor; then shook her head and glared back at Hans. That actually sounds like something that could be wrong with me, but I don't think so. Everything started getting fixed only yesterday afternoon. If I do have anything wrong with me remotely like that, it isn't permanent. Anna would help me get rid of it. "You know what; there is nothing wrong w-with me." Anna told me so. "Let's see what you are l-like after being locked in your r-room for thirteen years because of s-something that is simply part of who y-you are." Pause. "After certain usurpers throw y-you in your own castle's d-dungeon and eventually lie to you and c-claim your little sister is dead b-because of you. Now shut up and only answer m-my questions." Elsa paused again for a moment, then asked, "Why did you leave Princess Anna in the library?"
"I had no use for her anymore. Look, I know you don't like me. Didn't from the start. So since I wasn't going to get anywhere with you, I edited my plan and used your sister instead. Your sister is so naïve and stupid. You'd think it would be the other way around, since you were the one kept in her room since she was a kid."
"Don't you dare call my sister stupid!" Elsa nearly shouted. "You do that once more and I swear I will be seeing a solid block of ice in front of me instead of a disrespectful loathsome scumbag of a prince. You can insult me all day long to yourself if you like, but you will NOT insult my sister!" Elsa glanced down at the floor, realizing she was making ice spread everywhere in her anger, but she didn't attempt to thaw it. That jerk is going to hate me no matter what I do. My ice can just stay all over the floor for all I care. And wait a second…I didn't stutter once when I said all that. Good job, Elsa.
"I'd like to see you just try that," Hans commented, figuring Elsa would not follow through on her threat to freeze him solid. Somehow he was quite sure that although that girl might have the right to have him executed, she probably would not do any such thing.
Elsa whipped around to face the wall for a moment, her long platinum braid swinging behind her. Get it together, Elsa. You are not going to freeze that guy, no matter how much he deserves it. You are not a killer…you came close with those thugs at the ice palace, but you didn't actually do it. Calm down. Calm down. She took a deep breath and turned back to face Hans. I'll just change the subject. "How did you manage to make s-such a precise shot at m-my chandelier to drop it on me? I know it did n-"
"Did you know your own father was so scared of you that he considered keeping you in the dungeon permanently to live there?" Hans responded.
Elsa's face went white for a moment, but then she just gave Hans a scathing look and informed him, "You interrupted me." He's probably making things up, trying to hurt me. Well, it's not going to work. I'm not falling for any such thing. The only thing is…my parents did lock me down there twice, and the only reason I got out the second time was because Anna snuck down there and let me out…And that surprised expression Hans just made means he did drop the chandelier on me. I thought so.
"It's true. Go read your father's journal from several years ago. In the bottom drawer of the dresser in what appears to be the former monarch's room."
"You're lying," Elsa replied, but she didn't sound quite so sure of herself anymore. Please let him be lying…please…
"Nope. 'Today Elsa froze a large portion of the wall in her room, despite the fact she was still wearing her gloves. She is only twelve, but her powers seem to have grown in strength significantly overnight. It's frightening. Elsa is trying so hard to control it-I can see it on her face-but it's not good enough. Nothing is working. I fear she may have to move downstairs to the dungeon if the ice problem gets much worse'," Hans quoted a portion of the old journal he had found when he had gone snooping around the castle after Anna had left him in charge.
There's no way Hans could know about how my powers suddenly grew way stronger when I was twelve… Elsa stumbled backwards a few steps, practically falling into her original spot sitting on the throne. She easily remembered that incident from when she was twelve. 'I'm scared! It's getting stronger!' Elsa's twelve-year-old self said, staring at her hands as she backed towards the wall, where a large icy snowflake spread on the wall and part of the floor. 'Getting upset only makes it worse. Calm down.' I know, but I can't! It's too much for me, Elsa thought. She held her hands close against her chest and backed away further a moment later. 'No! Don't touch me! Please, I don't want to hurt you…'
I knew I was never good enough, Elsa thought. That proves it. I was still so stupid when I was twelve. Were you really going to make me live down there if I totally lost it, Mom and Dad? Why couldn't I have just talked to Anna from the beginning? She could have helped fix me…I know she could have. Tears trickled down Elsa's cheeks, and she was suddenly aware that it was snowing all over the Great Hall. I completely lost control this time. Completely, totally lost it. I want Anna back right now! She could help me fix this. On instinct, Elsa just pulled her gloves out of her pocket and yanked them on her shaking hands. Calm down, Elsa. You're causing a scene….wait a minute…that stupid Hans is still in here! I did this in front of him. Terrific. Not. Elsa managed to disperse most of the snow falling all over the Great Hall, but snowflakes still floated down only around her anyway. I fixed part of the mess I made, but… "I hate you, Hans. I really, really, hate you," she muttered, not caring if he heard her or not.
"The truth hurts, huh?"
Just then, Anna came running in, having announced to the guards right outside the Great Hall that she didn't care what Elsa said; she was going in there anyway. Anna slipped on the ice all over the floor and went sliding across the room, coming to a stop right in front of the throne dais. "Um…hi? Totally meant to do that! Hey, wait a second…why is there ice all over the place in here?" Anna hopped to her feet and looked carefully at Elsa's I'm-trying-to-be-neutral-but-I'm-failing expression. Then Anna noticed her sister was wearing her gloves again, and she whipped around to face Hans. "What did you do to Elsa?! What did you say to her? You had better tell me, or I will pop you right in the nose again!" He said SOMETHING to Elsa that made her all upset; I just know it.
"Your sister just can't take the truth, that's all. Why don't you ask her?" Hans replied instantly.
Elsa bit her lip. Anna's here. She can help me. I know she will. "I'm not s-saying a word to her with you present," she said as firmly as her slightly trembling voice would permit. Elsa felt Anna slip her hand into her own gloved one, and she squeezed Anna's hand tightly. Thank you, Anna.
"Oh, you just don't want me to see you break down, is that it?"
Anna jerked her hand out of her sister's, marched over to Hans, and slapped him in the face, not caring if she should do that or not. "I don't know what you told Elsa, but you are NOT going to pick on her if I have anything to do with it! How dare you hurt Elsa like that! Do you even know all the things she was dealing with for years and years on end?! You LIED to Elsa, telling her I was dead; and technically, you hurt me too. I really thought you loved me. Thank goodness my sister had the sense to nix the whole marriage thing from the get-go. What would you have done? Poisoned Elsa? Killed me in my sleep so you could be king? You have no sense of how other people think or feel, none at all! You're just lucky Elsa is nice. Do you realize she could have you executed for what you did? But noooo, the worst thing my sister did to you was freeze your feet to the floor. You just-"
Anna's speech was interrupted as Elsa opened the doors to the Great Hall to let the guards in. "Take Prince Hans back d-downstairs, please," Elsa told them. She scrunched her eyes shut and finally managed to disperse all of the rest of the ice in the room.
The second Hans and the guards were gone, Elsa shut the door again and just stood still, wondering how to tell Anna what happened. I completely lost it. I don't know what I would have done if Anna hadn't come in…
Anna ran over to Elsa and paused a couple feet away from her, remembering Elsa didn't like getting too close when she was upset. "Elsa, is it all right to give you a hug?" she asked.
"I…don't know…" Elsa frowned, but she didn't say anything more. What kind of response was that?! That was stupid, Elsa.
"Then I'm taking that as a yes," Anna said, and quickly hugged Elsa close. "See, everything's fine. The creep is back in the dungeon where he belongs; he's not going to say anything to hurt you any more."
Elsa shuddered a bit in Anna's arms, but she didn't pull away. "It w-wasn't Prince Creep exactly, Anna…he got into Dad's old j-journals and there was…there was…when I was t-twelve, Dad was already…alr-ready…" Elsa's already shaking voice broke and she burst into tears. Get it together, Elsa! Don't lose control again. Conceal, don't feel…wait, isn't that wrong? I don't want to do that anymore…
Anna's hold on her sister tightened when she realized Elsa's legs had collapsed under her. "It's ok, Elsa. I'm not going to let you fall," she said firmly. She scooped Elsa up in her arms and began staggering towards the stairs.
"I don't…want anyone s-seeing…me like this," Elsa whispered. I don't even like Anna seeing me like this, let alone anyone else in the castle…someone will end up saying there's something wrong with me and that I'm not fit to be queen…I'm surprised no one has done that already…
"Elsa, all the guests except Rapunzel and Eugene started heading to their ships right after breakfast. And that stupid duke and Hans, of course. Nobody's gonna see you all upset," Anna assured her.
Contented with this knowledge, Elsa just buried her face in Anna's shoulder and didn't make any more protests. "Thank y-you, Anna," she said, her voice sounding a bit muffled. Anna's…carrying me upstairs? Why did I collapse like that? Maybe there is something wrong with me. I don't know. No, there isn't. That stupid creep was just trying to make me think that.
Anna paused in front of their parents' old room. "Elsa, let's go see what this old journal of Dad's really said. Maybe Prince Creep was exaggerating." She carefully set Elsa down on her feet, but she didn't completely let go. "Can you walk by yourself now, sis? You're getting really heavy, no offense."
Elsa gave her sister a lopsided smile. "I think so. Does that m-mean you think I'm fat?" she asked. "'Cause I think I'm skinny as a s-stick, actually. I probably stick out i-in all the wrong pl-"
"Nonono, Elsa! Just…too heavy for me to carry any more," Anna corrected. Then she giggled when she realized Elsa had been teasing that time. "Your sense of humor needs to stop including picking on yourself!" Anna reached for her sister's hands, but Elsa just drew her hands back and wouldn't let Anna touch them. "Elsa, take the stupid gloves off, will you?! I can easily tell that you feel better now. You smiled and you made a joke."
"But I m-messed up. I lost c-control again…" Elsa glanced down at her hands and made a face. Maybe I should just leave them on, just in case…I don't like wearing them though…
Anna pulled Elsa down on the floor next to her in front of their parents' old dresser; then put an arm around Elsa's shoulders. "You made a little mistake, Elsa. Nothing more. It's ok to mess up sometimes. And besides, you wouldn't have even done that if that stupid creep hadn't purposely said things meant to hurt you. Take 'em off, Elsa. If you 'mess up' again, just think happy thoughts and take a few deep breaths. That should help you calm down if you can't just leave the situation for whatever reason."
Elsa relaxed a bit and allowed Anna to take her gloves off, but she still didn't smile. I know Anna is right, but…but I can't just totally lose it every time someone treats me like Hans did… She sighed and yanked the bottom drawer of the dresser open. "Let's find that journal."
"Yeah!"
A moment later, Elsa accidentally brushed her too-sensitive fingers against a rough spot on the wooden drawer and jerked away as she let out a quiet yelp. What was that?! Something poked me…it hurt!
"What's wrong?" Anna asked as she flipped through the journal she had found. "I think this is the right one…"
"That drawer hurt me!" Elsa announced.
Anna grinned and gently took Elsa's hand and peered at it closely. "You just got a splinter, that's all. A big one, it looks like. Come over to the window and I'll help you get it out."
Elsa followed her sister over to the window and just watched as Anna tried to get that splinter out of her finger. "I don't think I've gotten a s-splinter since I was little," Elsa said softly. Not that I like getting splinters or something-I don't-but I know why I never got any splinters. Because I was always wearing gloves.
"What, you like getting splinters stuck in your finger?" Anna asked, only half-teasing.
"No, I just…I'm still n-not used to actually touching things without the gloves. I suppose getting a s-splinter is like a sort of…rite of p-passage or something to me, I guess." Elsa smiled a bit as Anna finally got the splinter out and just gave her finger a reassuring squeeze.
"All fixed. Let's just try to let you touch things that aren't painful instead, hmm?" Anna paused for a moment before exclaiming, "Hey, I know! You'll have to tell me some things that you've always wanted to touch, like, I don't know…a cat. Or a dog. Velvet. Or whatever!"
"Velvet," Elsa replied with certainty. "I sort of remember l-liking the texture when I was little. I don't want t-to touch any…live animals…not yet. But maybe eventually?" she asked hopefully. I don't want to pet a kitten or a puppy…what if I hurt it? Or it might not like me and it'll be scared of me. I would sort of love a pet kitten, though…I like cats.
"Okie-dokie!" Anna smiled and pulled Elsa back over to the dresser. "I think I found that journal. Shall we take a look at it?"
Elsa frowned. What if Hans was actually telling the truth about it? "Could I l-look myself first, please?" she asked.
Anna handed her the old journal and then began digging around in the drawer in search of a journal from before the original accident when the two of them were little.
Elsa scanned the journal page after page. This is from the right year…I was twelve, but I don't see anything about what Hans said. "They were trying to g-get a son then?!" she blurted in surprise about one page. "Sexist," Elsa added in disgust a moment later. If Mom and Dad didn't want me to be the next Arendelle monarch, that's understandable; but then they should have just named Anna the crown princess. Blah. There have been several Arendelle queens in the past, so it's not like it's 'not done' in my country.
Anna just giggled. "Maybe it's just 'cause they knew I would make a really crummy queen if something happened to you or something," she suggested. "A son would be the only legal way the succession to the throne could 'skip over' me, right? I think, anyways." She paused before adding, "I thought the firstborn kid in our country was the first in line to the throne, period, whether they were a girl or a boy; and THEN the line of succession would put the boys in front of the girls."
"You didn't pay much attention i-in your lessons, did you?" Elsa giggled. "If the children are all g-girls or all boys, it goes from oldest t-to youngest. But if a girl is the oldest, she c-can be 'pushed back' by a younger brother. Technically, I think I should h-have been referred to as 'heir presumptive', n-not 'heir apparent', since I c-could have been pushed out of l-line by a younger brother…not absolutely p-positive on that, though. And if the oldest k-kid can be proven somehow unfit to rule, there's a p-provision according to Arendelle law that the n-next person in line can be made the crown princess, or p-prince, as the case may be." She closed her eyes and paused for a minute. "I would have easily s-satisfied that provision... Now that I'm th-thinking about it, our parents c-could have…disposed of me when I w-was a baby once they found out what w-was wrong with me," Elsa said softly.
"Who the heck would kill a little bitty baby?!" Anna exclaimed in horror.
"Anna! Don't say h-…what y-you just said. And it's happened before. I don't r-remember just how long ago it was, b-but one tyrannical king forever ago attempted to dispose of the f-firstborn child when it was born a g-girl unable to walk. The monarchy a-almost got wiped out when the public r-revolted," Elsa explained (rather nonchalantly, Anna thought).
"How did the public find out about the baby? And hey, babies can't walk anyway!"
"I am not g-going to sit here and inform you of Arendelle's h-history all day long," Elsa teased, thinking that it was her sister's own fault she didn't know these things. "Okay, a servant stole the child a-and escaped out of the castle w-with her. And the public c-calmed down once that tyrant k-king had been assassinated. That baby t-took the throne when she came of a-age. And that's how our f-family's bloodline is still on the throne. Enough i-info dump now?" She smiled at Anna and then went back to looking at the journal. At least Mom and Dad cared about me enough not to want to literally get rid of me. That's nice to know anyways. Elsa decided she would concentrate on that one good thing no matter what she and Anna found in the journal.
Anna stuck out her tongue at Elsa and scooted closer to her so she could read the journal with her. "You're a stinker, Elsa. And I love you."
I love you too, Anna. It makes me feel happy that Anna just treats me like a…normal sister. 'Stinker' and 'I love you' in the same breath…very Anna-ish. Elsa smiled and went on reading. "I think I f-found it…" she said a moment later after turning the page. "Ow!" That stings. I forgot how much I hated paper cuts.
"What now?" Anna asked.
"Paper cut," Elsa said sheepishly.
"Let me see it." Anna took Elsa's hand and looked at her finger. "You got a really icky one…"
"Thanks for telling me," Elsa deadpanned. "I think I c-can tell that myself-it hurts!" She clenched her hand into a fist and jerked it away from her sister. "Anna…stupid Hans wasn't l-lying," she whispered, pointing at the page in the journal. That entry is what Hans said verbatim. He just didn't add the last part… 'Elsa must be kept safe at all costs. She has a good head on her shoulders, and could potentially be a very savvy ruler for Arendelle when she grows up. It's too bad she has that physical anomaly of hers; it's made her too dangerous…'
Anna peeked over Elsa's shoulder and read the entry. "At least Dad acknowledged that you were smart?" she offered hesitantly. So Dad kept her as Crown Princess Elsa instead of making that title mine-which I'm glad I didn't have-because he knew she was smart. At least he gave Elsa a LITTLE credit, right?
Elsa abruptly shut the journal. "You know what; I don't w-want to read this anymore. It's just m-making me stuck in the past…I want t-to at least try to move on…okay?" At least Dad gave me credit that I had the brains to take care of Arendelle. That's good. I'm not going to worry about this anymore. She stuffed the journal back in the drawer and stood up. "I'm going to go t-take care of that paper cut."
Anna followed Elsa down the hall to her room.
"Anna, it's fine; I can take c-care of it myself," Elsa said, frowning as Anna insisted on helping Elsa take care of her finger. But it IS kind of nice that Anna wants to take care of someone like me. I was never there for Anna when she cut her finger when she was little…but she's not mad at me… "You're…helping me…" she added in a quiet voice.
"There. All better," Anna announced a moment later. "Elsa, why wouldn't I help you? Stop sounding so incredulous about it."
Elsa held her finger tightly with her other hand and smiled a bit at Anna. Thanks, Anna. My stupid finger is no big deal, but you not hating me or being mad at me is. Something suddenly popped into Elsa's head, "I forgot; we were supposed to go t-to the castle gardens with Rapunzel! There's a c-couple things I have t-to do first…you go on out there a-and tell them I w-will be coming shortly." Her expression suddenly grew animated-she couldn't wait to do a few things.
"Oh yeah! Elsa, I forgot something too! Can I get Kristoff a new sled? Pretty please? I kind of sort of crashed his when we nearly fell off a cliff and there were wolves and well…Yeah. A sled, please?" Anna asked.
Elsa's eyes grew big. What on earth was Anna doing when she came to find me at the ice palace?! Then she thought, Kristoff helped SAVE Anna…and me too, indirectly. I should reward him somehow. "Okay, you can buy a sled. But don't give it t-to him yet. I have to d-do something first."
"Awesome! See you in the garden in a few minutes!"
Elsa smiled and shook her head as Anna took off. I love you, Anna. You're silly and you make me happy.
Twenty minutes later, Elsa reread the things she had written up. Okay, cool. Kristoff will be the Official Arendelle Ice Master and Deliverer. I am cutting off business with Weselton-I am so glad I have a solid reason to do that now. And I'm sending Hans back to the Southern Isles in disgrace. I can't…kill him, even if a small bit of me wants to. She quickly changed into her ice-dress; right now she just wanted the small sense of strength it gave her inside. Elsa smiled at herself in front of the mirror. That's you, Elsa. You might still be that scared little girl inside sometimes, but that does not have to define you. So there. She lifted her chin, rolled her documents in one hand, and strode out the door.
Elsa met Gerda halfway down the stairs. "Please tell Kai to make sure the…d-dungeon walls I destroyed are r-repaired," she said.
"What of those broken shackles? Shall we dispose of them too, Queen Elsa?"
Elsa thought for a moment, wanting to do the right thing. If I did lose control for some reason, they could still contain me for a short time…I shouldn't have those destroyed, no matter how much I want to. "Just leave them where they l-lie, please," she decided.
"Very well…Miss Elsa, your ice-dress is beautiful, but don't you think it might be a bit…much?" Gerda asked carefully, not wanting to hurt Elsa's feelings.
"What's wrong with it?" Elsa asked, looking down at herself.
"No, Queen Elsa, there's nothing wrong with it," Gerda said quickly. "It's just a bit revealing, that's all…"
"I don't wanna change," Elsa blurted without thinking how childish it might sound. It's just my shoulders…Anna's dress she was wearing at the coronation showed her shoulders. What's the big deal about that? Okay, and I'm kind of showing my leg. That's what's wrong. But it's my dress…I made it. I'm not going to act like an idiot or anything… "I think I'd like t-to just keep my dress, thanks," she said finally.
"Miss Elsa, you can't just…"
"What?" Elsa asked.
"Never mind. Just be careful, all right?"
Elsa looked a bit confused for a moment, but then she just smiled and shrugged. "Okay." She went on her way downstairs, figuring if someone gave her grief about her dress, she would just ignore them. She loved that dress. Too bad if someone made a big stink about it. A dress made of ice isn't going to hurt anyone. It's something nice my powers can make, and I want to concentrate on that.
Elsa made her way to the door leading down to the dungeon. Okay, Elsa. You don't have to go down there at all. Just hand your documents to the guard and that's it. You can do it. She went up to the guard at the door and handed him the papers she was holding. "Please have Prince Hans sent d-down to the dock. He is being s-sent back to his home country. Escort the D-Duke of Weas-Weselton and his g-guards to their ship as well, please."
The guard nodded in assent. "As you wish, Queen Elsa."
Satisfied her work was done, Elsa happily went outside to the castle gardens to have some much overdue fun with her sister and cousin.
A/N: 'Scuse Elsa's little Arendellian history lesson.:P Please keep in mind I made up anything that has to do with Arendelle's government; I apologize if anything is totally stupid. I'd love opinions, though.:)
THERE WILL BE ONE MORE CHAPTER!:) Just so Elsa can have her happy ending without business and whatever else bothering her.:)
Last chapter coming soon!:)
P.S. I have officially decided that there will be a direct sequel to 'Secret Passages' since I have a solid idea.:) It will be wayyy shorter than this story, but it'll still be a multi-chap. 'Kay?:)