Thank you for all the reviews. Here is the next chapter. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: I don't own Castle
Chapter 3.
"You went to Richard Castle's book signing?" Wellington asked on their next session.
"Lanie, my friend, surprised me with it," Kate bit her lip. "Alexis ended up being there as well."
Wellington leant forward, eager to hear what happened. "Did they remember you?"
Kate sighed. "Not only did they remember me, but she made Rick go out to look for me." She still couldn't believe it.
"Tell me," he smiled, waiting for Kate to begin another story of a little red headed girl. Telling him was easy now, even at the part where she felt the loss of her mother, she still managed to tell him. Just talking, thinking, about Alexis made everything so much easier. She even watched as he scribbled in his note book, a smile on his face. Kate hadn't spoke this much to him since the first time she met Alexis and Rick.
"You're meeting her again?" Wellington asked, impressed.
"Yeah. This Monday," Kate said. The past week had already gone so slowly with Kate watching the time tick by. She only had one more day at work before Monday was finally here. How had she gone a year and a half before?
"This is good, Kate. I'm really happy for you," he told her. They had always brought Alexis up at least once in their sessions, Kate telling him how in the toughest of times she thought of her with her smile, helping Kate get through it.
"I'm happy, too." Kate smiled.
"Alexis will be good for you. Do you still think she'll be the one to find you?" He asked, his pen pausing, waiting for an answer.
"I hope so," Kate whispered.
"I haven't seen you smile like this since the first time you met her." He said.
"There's just something about her. She reminds me a lot of myself as a child," Kate explained.
"And you your mother?" He asked softly.
"I- I don't know. Being with Alexis reminds me of when I use to be with my mom," Kate said, thinking about the memory she had with having ice cream with Alexis, and the peanut butter ice cream.
"You chose the flavour you used to share with her?" He spoke carefully, knowing how uncertain Kate was talking about her mother. Some days were good, others were bad.
She stared at her hands. "I just saw it on the menu and... I don't know."
"You just ordered it?" Kate nodded her head. She watched as he scribbled in his notebook, not sure what to make of it now.
"Tell me about your day out on Monday," he said. "What do you plan on doing?"
Kate smiled. "We're meeting at Central Park. Alexis wants to go to the park and go on the pedal boats," she told him, watching as his gaze focused on her. After having a year of therapy here, she knew he was analysing her body language, her facial expressions. Kate took a deep breath, making sure her body relaxed. "I haven't been on the boats since..."
"Since with your mom." He finished for her.
She nodded her head, looking down. Her hand reaching for the ring on her necklace around her neck, something she did when she thought of her mother. If she was here, what would she say? Would she laugh at Kate for being friends with a small girl or smiled, proud. She wondered every day whether her mother was proud of her, wondered what her life would have been like if her mother was still here.
"Kate?" Wellington questioned. She bit her lip, turning her focus back to him. He knew want her zoning out meant and now he was watching her carefully. She wasn't going to have a break down, she wasn't going to cry and she wasn't going to let the emotions get to her today.
Kate forced a smile. "I should be going."
Kate sighed, watching the clock. The minutes were slowly ticking by, Sunday taking its time to end. It wasn't long before her shift ended and then she would go home, watching the clock again. She kept thinking about what tomorrow would bring. A small smiled tugging at her lips as she thought about seeing Alexis again.
This was the first time since joining the NYPD, she had been anticipating her day off. Joining others as they counted down the days. Paperwork seemed worse than normal, the days seemed longer and clocks never seemed to move. She hated this, but Monday was almost here now.
Kate watched the hands of the clock make its final seconds, smiling as her shift came to an end. She bided everyone a goodbye and then left, making her way home. But when she got home, she found herself sitting on her sofa with a glass of wine, watching the clock again. Was this what her life had come to?
She flipped her phone open, finding a message from Lanie telling her to have fun tomorrow and then one from Rick.
Alexis has been watching the clock all day. He had texted her.
Kate smiled. She's not the only one.
You have time to watch clocks with being a detective in training? He asked her.
The joys of paperwork.
You've had the worst day then.
Tomorrow will be better.
Seeing you? It's all we've been talking about.
Kate bit her lip, smiling. Good. Then I'll see you tomorrow.
She closed her phone, still smiling at herself. Watching the clock wasn't making the time go any faster. Kate had decided to run herself a bath, reading Driving Storm again. She smiled at the picture of him on the dust jacket. How was she meeting him and his daughter tomorrow? How was it both of them had managed to affect her life so much in different ways? His books, her smile.
By the time morning came, Kate sighed with happiness. It had taken her a while to get to sleep. Now Kate rolled out of bed, going into the kitchen to maker herself a coffee. She wasn't meeting them till around lunch, giving her the morning to watch the clock again.
Why not make herself some pancakes? That gave her something to do and she was hungry. Cereal could wait till tomorrow, right now, she wanted pancakes. Kate made herself the pancakes, sipping at her coffee and turning the radio on. She couldn't remember the last time she made breakfast. Then she thought about making brownies to take with her later, thinking how Alexis would love them. Did the girl even like brownies? Kate hoped she did.
The pancakes were eaten, the coffee was finished and the brownies were in the oven cooking. An hour of her morning was taken up and now she was sat, waiting for the clock to tick by. If she gave it another hour then she could get dressed, leaving the house on time. But what to do for an hour?
She sighed, laying on the sofa to flick through the channels. It seemed working was better than sitting around and doing nothing. Checking on the brownies, she watched a random show that was on. The brownies smelt good when she turned the oven of, pulling them out with a smile on her face. When was the last time she made brownies? Her smiled fell as she realised that she hadn't made them since her mothers death. She left the tray on the side, staring at the brownies. They were her mothers favourites, Kate had made them for her on her birthday and on mothers day.
Kate packed the brownies away in a tub, she wouldn't let it get her down today. The day meant too much to Kate. She shuffled into the shower, wanting to wash all the pain away for one day. The brownies may have been her moms favourites, but she shouldn't feel guilty about making them for someone else. Her mother would have loved it, loved to share them with Alexis. The water fell on top of her, Kate staring at the wall, wanting to block the darkness away.
Alexis. The little girl was expecting her today, she didn't want Kate to appear in an emotional state. She wanted to be friends with Kate and Kate wanted to be friends with her. Taking a deep breath, she turned of the water and stepped out of the shower. She imagined picking up all the emotions and thoughts of her mother, placing them in a box, which she locked.
"What to wear?" She hummed under her breath, distracting herself. Kate ran her hand along her clothes, going back and forth in decision. Should she wear something summery? Something suitable for pedalling on a boat, dresses were out. Her fingers picked out a flowery play suit, she hadn't had a chance to wear it yet and now she found the perfect time to.
Sliding the thin material on, she looked at herself in the mirror. The play suit came to her mid-thigh, it would be suitable for peddling and playing with Alexis. She put her denim waist coat on over the top and then started on her hair and make up. Kate enjoyed having her hair up in a pony tail, it was a safety risk at work, but now she decided, why not? Why was she getting so dressed up for going to the park anyway? Yes, she's never had much of a reason to wear clothes other than her work clothes, but still. Lanie would be grinning at her if she was here.
Picking up her sunglasses and bag, she was ready to go. Kate was even on time. But she paused at the door, remembering the brownies. Kate stood, biting her lip and then picked them up, hoping Alexis liked them.
The drive was slow, Kate found herself sighing with every red light and grinning every time it turned green. She found herself becoming nervous, but after the ice creams she had no reason to be. Alexis was a loving girl and, yes, Rick was a flirt and immature at times, but she enjoyed being around him as well.
Central Park was packed, the summer holidays and tourists had crammed themselves together, all wanting to be out enjoying the sun. What if she couldn't find them? She was supposed to meet them by the carousel. Kate made her way through the busy paths, towards the carousel, searching through the crowds for Alexis and Rick. She grinned when she spotted them, Alexis on Rick's shoulders looking through the crowd for Kate.
"Alexis!" She called, waving up at the girl. Alexis turned Kate's way, her face brightening up with a smile as she waved.
"You came!" The little girl cheered.
"Of course I did," Kate smiled up at the girl, then looked back to greet Rick. He was watching her in a way that made her smirk, perhaps getting dressed up a bit was worth it. "Good to see you too, Rick."
"Kate," He grinned. "Its a change from seeing you in your work clothing."
"Is that a good or a bad change?" She asked.
"Defiantly good." He grinned, Kate watching as his eyes lowered to her legs again.
Kate rolled her eyes, turning back up to the girl. "Your daddy is silly."
"You're really pretty," the girl said.
"Oh, Alexis. Thank you," Kate said. "But not as beautiful as you. Are you wearing a dress?"
Rick let the girl down, letting Alexis do a little twirl to show Kate. The dress was an emerald green, making Alexis' hair brighter, especially in the sun. "Do you like it?"
"It's beautiful," She smiled as Alexis took her hand. "Do you think they do one in my size?"
Alexis giggled. "I don't think they have your size."
"That's too bad then." Kate said.
"Shall we get going then, ladies?" Rick asked.
"What are we doing first?" Kate looked between the two Castles', curiously.
"Do you want to go on the boats? Or the park? O-or we could go to the fountains?" Alexis asked Kate, swinging their hands as they walked.
"Well, what do you want to do?" Kate asked the girl.
"I want to do everything with you." She smiled up at Kate.
Kate was touched. The smile on her face widening. "You chose where you want to go first then."
Alexis thought for a while. Kate and Rick exchanged a look, him grinning as if Alexis did this all the time. In the end she finally decided, wanting to go to the park.
"You're going to love this," Rick whispered in her ear. "She'll make you go in there with her."
"Are you sure I'm going to be the one loving this," Kate raised an eyebrow. "You know you could always follow behind."
"Uh."
"I'm here for the kid, Rick." She winked, following Alexis into the park. A grin played at her lips, it was so easy to play Rick. He fell for her flirts and charm so easily. Kate knew if she looked back now, he would be staring after them. But what she told him was right, she was here for his daughter.
"My mommy never came in the park with me," Alexis told her, skipping on her way down to the park. "She was always bored and wanted to go."
Kate hadn't asked about the mother, it wasn't her place to. She could see how talking about her mother upset the girl and Kate didn't want to see her frowning. "Well, shall I tell you a secret?"
"What?" Alexis questioned.
"I love playing in parks." Kate told the girl, smiling.
Kate watched the smile light up on Alexis's face. She felt pride in having caused that smile. "You do?" She asked in disbelief.
"Yep." Kate said.
"Daddy loves playing in parks as well," Alexis said. "But he's too big and always gets stuck."
She looked back at Rick now, he was sat on the bench watching them. Seeing Kate look back, he waved. "I think your daddy just likes being a kid."
Alexis giggled again. "I think so, too."
Kate followed the girl into the playground, letting Alexis pull her along by the hand. The girl did wait for her, watching with a smile as Kate squished as small as she could to get through the child sized gaps. Looks of sympathy exchanged with other adults. She was thankful that Rick hadn't followed in behind them. Alexis told her how she liked to play jungle, pretending that the park was the jungle and she was the animals climbing in the jungle.
"You can be a... tiger." Alexis said.
"What are you?" Kate asked her.
"A monkey," She giggled, turning around to begin the next climbing adventure of the park. When Kate was a little girl, parks weren't as big and extreme as this. She would have found it too high to climb, probably not going up without her mom.
"Kate," Alexis called. "You coming?"
"Yeah." She followed behind the girl again, groaning as she hit her head. Alexis looked back in concern, Kate telling her she was fine before the girl giggled and then carried on. Kate was small, she had no idea how Rick did this. Even when they came to the end, Rick sitting in the distance waving at them, she felt relieved.
The last part was on a slop, leading down back to the ground – back to safety. Kate was a cop and she was letting a park get the better of her. She just hoped that she could do this last bit without tripping or bashing her head, especially not in front of Rick.
"You're almost there," the girl called her on, Rick walking up behind them with Kate's bag and Alexis's rucksack. "You can do it."
She was a cop, of course she could do this. The relief and pride she had with herself after completely the course, left both Kate and Alexis grinning. As she stepped to walk over to them, she had to trip, falling. Kate groaned, mortified with herself. She went through the whole park without falling and then when she gets back on ground she has to trip. Kate had never been clumsy, she was always good on her feet.
"Kate!" Alexis bent down. "Are you okay?"
Rick followed behind his daughter. "That was very graceful, detective in training."
"I can't believe I just did that." She mumbled, accepting Rick's hand to help her up. Kate sighed, brushing the bark from her bottom to Rick's amusement. "Stop enjoying this."
"Daddy," Alexis warned.
"Are you hurt?" Rick asked.
Kate couldn't look him in the eye. She was embarrassed with herself, annoyed that he was enjoying this, but touched that he cared as well. "I'm fine."
"Your knees aren't bleeding." Alexis told her, brushing the dirt from them.
"Thank you." She said.
"Are you always this clumsy?" Rick asked.
"No," Kate told him, looking up to his face for the first time since falling. The concern in his eyes was obvious, but a hint of his smirk still lingered on his lips. "That was so embarrassing."
"It was cute," Rick said. "Your little triumph smile, followed by your crashing fall."
"Thanks." Kate grumbled.
"Don't be mean, daddy." Alexis told him, taking Kate's hand again. "Its usually me that falls."
"I'm glad it was me instead of you then," Kate said.
She giggled. "What are we doing next?"
"Its gone past lunch," Rick said. "I'm surprised your tummy isn't rumbling."
"It is now!" Alexis announced, patting her stomach.
"Good," Kate swung the girls hand. "I made brownies."
"You did?" Alexis gasped.
"She's obsessed with brownies," Rick told her, handing Kate her bag again.
"Thanks," she said. "And I did. That's good then as I made enough for you to take home after." Both she and her mom loved brownies, Kate smiled and then remembered this morning. The emotions and thoughts locked up in her mental box were now wanting to make an appearance again.
"Kate?" Rick called.
"Hmm?" She said, shaking her head in hope they would all disappear again. Not now when she was here with Alexis and Rick.
"Did you hit your head when you fell?" His fingers brushed her hair, checking for a bump. Kate looked up, meeting his eyes. They were close, too close. She sucked in a breath, forcing herself to look away again.
"I'm fine." She smiled.
"The doctor gives out lolly pops," Alexis told her. "And a sticker if you're a good girl."
"Honestly, I'm fine," she told both of them. "Now why don't we go get some lunch and eat my brownies. I believe its my go to pay."
The two of them watched her, concerned. She gave them another smile, swinging Alexis' hand between them again. Both of them soon followed, heading towards the nearest café. They brought sandwiches, drinks and crisps. Rick giving in after Kate demanded to pay. It was only fair, he paid for the ice creams, she paid for the lunch.
They sat under the shade of a tree nearby, away from the crowded patches of grass. She and Rick sat with Alexis between them, watching the park and city in front of them. Sandwiches were passed out, followed by the crisps and drinks, then Kate's brownies.
"Best brownies ever!" Alexis announced, followed by another bite.
"These brownies are to die for," Rick said, the comment taking Kate of guard. She knocked over her drink, watching as it led a trial through the grass turning it soggy. The alley of her mothers murder appeared, the blood running from her mothers body. She sucked in a breath.
"Kate?" Rick questioned again.
"I – uh – just realised that I wasn't supposed to be eating these brownies," Kate said, hitting herself for the unbelievable lie and almost breaking in front of them. She couldn't let it happen, she couldn't lose Alexis.
Rick looked confused, clearly not believing her. "Why not?"
"Diet." Kate said.
"But you're so skinny!" Alexis told her, giggling. Kate gave Alexis a small smile, holding onto that giggle.
"Maybe you should be eating more brownies," Rick said. Kate cringed, knowing she was underweight. After a year of therapy, of her hiding most of her emotions from Wellington, but clearly people knew. He had told her she didn't have to have therapy any more, did he tell her that to see if she asked for help? She couldn't be thinking about this now.
"I've already had two," Kate smiled. "You save them and take them home."
"Thank you, Kate!" Alexis hugged her, Kate smiling.
"You're welcome. Now what are we doing next?" Kate asked her.
"Can we do the boats? Please?" The little girl asked.
"Of course," Kate smiled slightly, holding back the memories of being on the boats with her mother. She looked up to Rick, he was watching her in a way she couldn't put. If he finds out, would he stop her from seeing Alexis? Kate forced another smile on her face, handing the brownies to him. "Your pudding for tonight."
"You sure?" He asked, his tone had turned soft.
"I made them for Alexis, I'm sure," She smiled at him, needing to prove to him. "You better leave some for Alexis."
"She better leave some for me," Rick said.
Alexis giggled, a real smiled forming on Kate's lips now. They walked over to the boats, Rick running ahead to buy their tickets before Kate could complain. She shook her head at him. Alexis swung their joined hands, smiling and telling Kate about how she was starting school in the fall. She was scared, but excited and Kate smiled imagining her on that first day.
"I'm back," Rick announced. "Did you girls miss me?"
"What took you so long?" Kate asked.
"You wouldn't believe how long the line is," he sighed. "You ready to get in the longest line of your life?"
"Tad exaggeration?" Kate said.
Kate was proved wrong when, in fact, it was the longest line of her life. The young girl had gotten bored, along with Rick, the three of them resulting in playing I spy and rock, paper, scissors. Rick pouting when both girls beat him. She found herself laughing again along with the other two. When it was finally their go, Kate and Rick sat in the seats with Alexis sitting in the middle.
"You better not crash us," Rick told Alexis, who grinned. "I'm sure Kate doesn't want to fall into the pond."
"Neither do I," Alexis said.
"Your pedalling better not be slow," Kate told Rick. "And you better not leave it all to me."
"What kind of man would I be if I left you to do all the pedalling?" He said.
"Good," Kate grinned. "Lets see if you can keep up with me."
He raised an eyebrow at her. "Challenge accepted."
"No crashing and no going into the fountains," Alexis told them both with a giggle. The man came over pushing them of and then they were floating away from the side. Kate gave Rick a wink, making Alexis giggle, and then she peddled. Perhaps she was showing of a little or perhaps she liked to watch him match her pace, she and Alexis were both enjoying it.
"You pedal so fast." Rick gasped.
Kate slowed down for him, grinning. "I'm a cop. And don't' forget I'm smaller than you.
"We went really fast," Alexis said. "I stirred the boat to stop us from crashing."
"You did," Kate said. "That was very good driving."
Alexis giggled. "Thank you."
"Good job you're good at stirring, otherwise we would have likely crashed with Kate's pedalling by now," Rick said, peddling again slowly.
They went around the lake, Kate grinning as the ducks went to bite Rick's fingers after he tried to stroke them, Alexis laughing. She rolled her eyes as he pouted at her. Alexis stirred in the direction they were heading, only getting her lefts and rights confused once. Kate laughed as they ended up going around in a circle, Alexis grinning mischievously. When they were called to come in, all three of them were laughing.
After they walked around for a bit, Alexis holding both Kate and Rick's hand as she skipped between them. The sun was starting to sink in the sky and Kate knew with a sinking feeling that their time was coming to an end. Neither Kate nor Alexis wanted to say goodbye, they didn't want the day to end.
"Hey, I'll call you." Kate promised the girl, letting her run into her arms.
"Can we meet again next Monday?" She asked.
"I would like to," Kate said, looking up at Rick.
"Monday's is Kate day." Rick told Alexis, giving Kate a smile.
Alexis cheered, her arms winding around Kate's neck. She held her close."We can see you every Monday then."
"Yep," Kate said. "And I'll still call you."
"Can't you come round during the week?" Alexis asked.
"I have work, sweetie," Kate said. "But maybe if I finish early."
Alexis nodded her head, holding on to Kate tighter. When she finally let go, Kate smiled down at Alexis giving her a small wave. "I'll see you soon."
They waved to Kate as she left and then the two turned, walking the opposite way. She watched the father and daughter walk, hand in hand, a smile playing at her lips. How had she been so lucky to meet them? Grinning, she walked to her car, already dreading the seperation until she met them again.
When she got to her car, Kate pulled out her keys from her bag, opening the car. Kate dropped her keys as she sat down and sighed, bending down to pick them up. Her mothers ring fell from behind her play suit, dangling on the necklace in front of her. Remembering, Kate froze, a sickening feeling twisting in her stomach.
She had forgotten. Being on the pedal boats the first time without her mother and she hadn't remembered, hadn't even thought about her. Kate was too busy enjoying herself, laughing, to realise. She pulled her knees up to her chest, feeling guilty. The brownies, the boats, her mother not here. All of the thoughts and emotions flooding her that she had blocked and forgotten from the day. Them all coming back to her now as she sat in the car, hands pulling at her hair as she cried.
Aw. I hope you liked the chapter, please do review. Next one should be soon, I'm at college during the week so posting is slower. A certain someone joins the precinct in the next chapter. I wonder who...