A/N that is important:

This chapter is a little short in terms of how far down into the timeline I wanted to go, but RL is unforgiving and I really wanted to get something out tonight. 'Suspense' or not, I don't want to cause any headaches due to chronic confusion. I promise you won't be as 'out of the loop' story -wise after the next chapter.

All publicly recognisable characters and locations are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended.

Just incase:

Timeline: Where Edward was when Alice is at the door, about to talk to Bella.

Chapter 5

EPOV

Long flowing mane of strawberry blonde hair, cast behind her head.

Large breasts, they weren't real but that had never been a concern.

Flat, muscular stomach, clenching in time with my thrusts.

Her body was 'perfected', reconstructed apparently.

Deep grey eyes, a unique color, clouded in pleasure and emotions I could never return.

As I studied her, I wondered what was wrong.

Why was I not feeling these things that she so obviously felt?

She was a lot like me.

She was determined.

She didn't care who got hurt.

She would get what she wanted- no matter the consequence.

She would achieve what she wanted to achieve, in any way possible.

As a result, there were few things Tanya Denali wanted, but could not have.

I was one of them.

She was never one to beat around the bush.

She wanted me, she wanted everything.

She wanted a relationship, she wanted marriage, she wanted children.

Therefore, her wants were perfectly identical to my hard limits.

I looked at her, writhing and moaning my name, arching her back and clutching the mattress behind her.

She looked down at me, eyes possessive, enraptured.

I tried to reciprocate, even then.

Nothing.

These were very depressing thoughts to be contemplating on while having sex with a "beautiful" woman.

I should not have been thinking of how alone I was. How I'd been willing myself to feel something for Tanya Denali. Of all people. The fault in that effort was so obvious, but yet, what better did I deserve?

I shook my head- I wanted to erase the thoughts from my brain.

Not permanently, though. I realized, been ignoring vital thoughts like those for quite a while.

I also realized this was more 'revelation' than 'recreation".

I held my eyes shut, trying to focus on the one thing I actually could feel from this woman. And even then, when I tried my hardest to accept her in the simplest form, I could not do so.

Because behind my eyelids was a different picture.

But not strawberry blonde curls-

No.

What brought me to a shuddering orgasm was not even Tanya's walls contracting around me.

It was the image of a beautiful girl, whose name I had yet to know.

But I was already more enraptured by her than I ever had been by Tanya Denali.

Somewhere amongst all the warring thoughts and conflicting desires, a wall was broken, and I felt, with earth shattering force, an emotion I'd been long withholding.

Guilt.

I wasn't sure exactly what caused it. Was I simply angry that I had let down my defences? Maybe I was sorry for using Tanya, but that had never been a concern before.

I was confused.

What I was positive of though, was that this rib crushing, chest constricting feeling had never been a concern before the woman upstairs came unconsciously into my life.

A/N: As soon as I can I'll post the other half. RL for these past days was fic-worthy.

Again, my apologies. It will all make sense in a bit- I promise.

I wont even beg pathetically down on my knees for you to review.