Take It Like a She-Cat
Chapter 1: Prologue
The first thing that came out of Brokenclaws mouth was a lie.
Lying came naturally to him like animal instincts, wired so deeply into him that part of me wonders if he could ever think any differently. Can a cat be born with so much evil, or is just it created over time? If it's beaten into someone enough, do they even have a choice?
I don't think I'll ever know.
It was a cold winter night. Frost covered the entire forest like a blanket. Brokenclaw shivered and curled up a little more in his nest, wondering for a moment how cold the she cats were. He pushed the thought away almost at once, telling himself that that was the wrong way to think.
She-cats don't need to be warm; Icestars voice rang in his ears. We don't keep tree's warm, do we? No, a tree's only purpose is to bring oxygen into our world. Just as a she cats only purpose is to serve us.
"Brokenclaw," a sleepy voice mumbled behind him. "You're not asleep, are you? It's time for our shift."
Brokenclaw turned his head, blinking tiredly. His friend Bluelight stood hunched over, as if he was an elder with tired bones. Brokenclaw understood why, they both had the late shift all week and it was starting to take a toll on them both.
"I don't know why we always have to work so late," he muttered as he stood up from his warm nest. "Can you even remember the last time Foxfur had to get up at this time?"
"Maybe before he started kissing Icestars ass so much," Bluelight rolled his eyes as he led the way of the den. "Icestars got that guy so whipped it's not even funny anymore."
"No doubt," Brokenclaw started trembling involuntarily as he stepped out of the den, realizing it was even colder than he thought. The she cats must be just freezing, he thought again. Ugh, I need to stop thinking about it!
He could see them huddled together, shaking from the cold before he even got close. The pen the she cats resided in was covered in frost.
"Health check," Bluelight snapped, the kind tone he spoke to Brokenclaw with changing aggressively. "Everyone stand up."
The pen the she cats lived in consisted of a bunch of twigs lined up in a circle, with thorn branches woven in. Bluelight shoved the bigger sticks that were used as a door to the side, revealing the she cats. They stared up at the toms, eyes scared. Brokenclaw couldn't look at them; it made him feel too bad.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only cat here that feels any sympathy for them.
"I said STAND UP," Bluelight snarled, taking a menacing step forward. This spooked the she cats, and they mewed pitifully like a bunch of kits. Brokenclaw accidently made eye contact with one of them and looked away at once.
The she cats, nearly frozen from the cold, stood up on shaking legs. Their lips were thin and terribly blue.
"I will begin roll call," Bluelight spoke the words out of routine, looking bored as if it was a chore. "Loki."
"Here," a tiny gray she cat whispered sadly. "Bluelight, we're freezing-"
"Loki," Bluelight barked again, but speaking to someone else. A different gray she cat mumbled something to show she was there, staring at the ground.
There was three different she cats named Loki, all gray but not related. Icestar had named them all Loki regardless, because they all had the same color fur.
It doesn't matter if they have the same name, Icestars words rang in Brokenclaws ears again. We don't name different colored rocks, do we? They're all the same thing.
Icestars logic disturbed Brokenclaw a bit, and he felt bad all over again. I wouldn't like it if there was more than one cat with my name.
"Ginger," Bluelight continued, nodding as a white she cat squeaked from the back of the group. Brokenclaw wondered why he skipped the third Loki, remembering after a moment that she had been relocated at the last gathering.
Once every four gatherings, the prettiest she cats would attend with the tom cats. The leaders of each clan would make a swap, each picking out the she cat they liked best. The she cat would then be used to bear kits for the clan. After the kits were born, their only purpose would be to cater to the leader at every second. When the next four full moons came and went, the selected she cat would be exiled and the process would repeat itself.
The leader of each clan would take care of the kits until they were old enough to join the other she cats. If it was a tom cat, the leader would treat him like a king.
If a she cat was born, it was the opposite.
There were three clans, the Kings, the Silver Knights and the Jokers. Brokenclaw was glad he was a part of the Silver Knights; despite how things went in the forest he knew they had it the best. The Kings clan was pretty shady, and he shuddered to think about how the she cats were treated over on that side of the forest. The Jokers were a mystery. No one really knew what went on in there, and Brokenclaw didn't care to find out.
"Lila," Bluelights snarky voice broke his thoughts, and he snapped his head back up. Again, he caught eyes with one of the she cats and he swore under his breath.
"Here," a sad voice called out from the group.
"And Cindy is in Icestars den, so that's where she is," Bluelight muttered to himself under his breath. "Alright, who do we have left?"
Brokenclaw hoped he was still talking to himself, so he didn't reply to his question. He already knew who the last cat on the list was, but he didn't want to point it out.
Hanna, his heart hurt just thinking about her name. Hanna was the only orange she cat, and the only one that was just as pretty as the third Loki. Brokenclaw had liked her ever since he had met her, and he wasn't looking forward to the next gathering. One of the leaders will pick her for sure next time, he thought sadly. Oh, its times like these when I wish it didn't have to be like this. I'd rather hold her than have her work for me.
I'd rather her love me, but she's just a slave.
She has no choice
"HANNA!" Bluelight cried at last, finally figuring out who he was missing. He looked around the group, eyes narrowing angrily as he looked for her. "Hanna, speak up please."
"She's not here," The second Loki whispered quietly.
"Did I ask you to talk?" Bluelight snapped, even though her words were helpful. He glared at the she cats as if they had just announced they wanted to fight him. Brokenclaw could feel his heart dropping at an alarming rate, and he hoped to Starclan that Hanna didn't try to run away.
I can't even imagine what Icestar would do to her if she tried to escape, Brokenclaw thought, worried. Oh, Hanna. Where are you?
"Where the fuck is Hanna," Bluelight hissed in Brokenclaws ear. "Graywhisker reported they were all here not even an hour ago!"
"I don't know," Brokenclaw hissed back, feeling frightened for her safety. "Maybe she went to the dirt place."
"She knows she needs a warrior present," Bluelight growled. "Oh, she is in big trouble."
"I'll go have a look around," Brokenclaw said quickly, realizing it would be better for him to find her rather than the hostile Bluelight.
"I'll stay here and guard," Bluelight replied, nudging Lila who was sitting at the front of the huddle. "How's it going, girls?" he laughed sarcastically, voice mean. "Having a fun night in the cold?"
Brokenclaw left quickly, trying not to feel bad about anything. He was starting to get annoyed with Bluelight, who was being even more rude than usual.
"Hanna," Brokenclaw called softly, hoping not to wake the tom cats. Oh, wouldn't that be just great. Poor Hanna would be in even more shit.
"Brokenclaw?" Hanna's little voice rang out in the cold air, and Brokenclaw turned to his side. Hanna was peering out at him from behind a tree, her eyes scared.
"What are you doing?" Brokenclaw whispered gently, looking around to make sure no one was watching him. "You know you're not supposed to be out here."
Hanna just stared at him, her eyes filled with fear and sadness. It broke Brokenclaws heart into a million pieces.
"I'm not going to hurt you," Brokenclaw said, voice cracking. This… this isn't right. Why can't anyone else see this?
"If you did, it would be because I deserved it," Hanna recited the words she was instructed to say, flattening her ears. "Sir."
"You don't need to call me sir," Brokenclaw said. "Unless we're around others."
"Okay, sir," Hanna said again, sounding irritated this time.
"Hanna," Brokenclaw sighed. "You're making me sad-"
"Well what the fuck do you expect me to do, Brokenclaw?" Hanna hissed with an intense anger. "Tell you I'm sorry? That everything's gonna be okay?"
"You need to get back into the pen," Brokenclaw said at last, realizing he had said the completely wrong thing. "Bluelights angry you got out. You're lucky it was my shift when you decided to leave. And how'd you get past the thorns?"
"It wouldn't matter anyway," Hanna hissed as she shoved past him in the direction of the pen. "Sir."
Brokenclaw led the way back, heart heavy. I don't blame her. I'm so lucky I got born a tom cat…
"Found her in the dirt place," Brokenclaw lied as he stepped back into the pen. Bluelight glared at Hanna angrily.
"You broke a rule," he hissed. "You know the drill."
Hanna didn't speak as she got into position, staring at Brokenclaw the whole time. As soon as she was lying flat on the ground, Bluelight stepped on top of her, latching his claws into her back.
With a terrible jerk, he twisted to the side, scratching deep into Hanna's back. He did it again and again, and Brokenclaw felt sick.
Hanna's eyes didn't leave his.
Hanna woke up to the sound of loud voices shouting outside the pen. She got up slowly, wincing as the cuts on her back started to sting painfully.
"Sounds like Graywhisker out there," Ginger whispered as she stood up at once. "Oh, my bones hurt."
"Are you okay, Hanna?" Loki1 asked gently, looking over at her friend sadly. "Bluelight really tore one into you last night."
"I don't think he needed to be so violent," Lila put in. "But why did you even leave in the first place, Hanna? You knew he'd get mad."
"I don't know," Hanna confessed, not knowing why she'd do that to herself. Guess I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all.
"She cats, we are hungry," Graywhisker called from outside the pen. "Prepare the meals and you can have whatever's left over."
"Which will be nothing," Hanna whispered angrily, feeling a boiling hatred rise up in her. "There's never anything left over."
"At least it'll be over for you soon, Hanna," Loki2 said sadly. "We all know you're going to be picked at the next gathering."
"What good is that going to do me?" Hanna snapped, shaking her head. "You think I want to have some assholes kits?"
"No," Loki2 replied gently. "But think about it, Hanna. When your four moons are up, you can leave."
"Yeah, we're never getting out," Loki1 said miserably, staring at her paws. "We're going to be slaves forever. But you, you get to leave."
"Where am I gonna go," Hanna asked, feeling her body tremble slightly. As much as I hate my life, I don't want to be alone… these she cats are my friends.
"Maybe you can find Fairlight," Ginger suggested. Hanna thought back to the cat who had been chosen last time, by the leader of the Joker clan. Fairlight was a pretty light yellow cat with yellow eyes. Three moons ago she was chosen, replaced with Cindy from the Kings clan. Hanna didn't see much of Cindy; she spent most of her time in Icestars den.
"Yeah, go find Fairlight," Loki2 said, sounding half hopeful and half joking. "Find her and get us the hell out of here."
"She cats!" Graywhisker barked again. "If the foods not prepared in five seconds, you won't eat for a week!"
"Better go," Hanna said, making way for the entrance. Graywhisker shoved the sticks to the side to let her out. Hanna spotted Brokenclaw at once, staring at her from a little ways away.
"What'll you have?" Hanna called out, sarcasm lacing her tone. "Squirrel or mouse today, sir?"
Brokenclaw stared at her, looking nearly as sad as she felt. Her heart beat painfully against her chest, and she struggled to push her feelings away.
"I'm not hungry," he whispered.