Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned in this story.

They all belong to their rightful owner: Craig Bartlett.

Title: "Leave the lights on"

In the last chapter: Spring-break or not, Arnold and Helga's teacher weren't one to agree that a vacation meant no homework so the two blondes found themselves doing homework together. Helga had decided to use a lollipop as a way to focus on her homework even though it was more of a distraction to Arnold.

When Miles and Miriam called, it was clear that not only were they drinking, but Miriam sounded like her old self for a moment, which both angered and saddened Helga. She told Arnold she would talk to Miles and Miriam when they got home and Arnold agreed.

In the end, the blondes forgot about their homework and decided to celebrate Easter in the way they knew best; painting eggs and each other.

Author's 1st note: Warning!

… That's all I'm gonna say :P Cant' think of anything else and it's not the usual warning xD

[Please notify me if you notice any grammar mistakes. This isn't my first language, so there's bound to be mistakes.]

Chapter 27: "Nothing is alright"

Why am I here? How did they shanghai me into this little circle of Estrogen? Listen to them! It's been two minutes and they already sound like a Tupperware party in a chicken farm! Helga thought and huffed at the last part. Tupperware party; I gotta remember that one.

The bored blonde had no idea how the other girls in her class had managed to make her part of their little girl chatroom on this fine Friday morning. Helga hadn't even moved from her usual seat next to Arnold and yet she was surrounded by girls. She knew it was Rhonda's idea though; ever since the new year began, Rhonda had been morbidly fascinated with the blonde. Helga wasn't sure if Miss Wellington-Lloyd had any ulterior motives for asking about her past and her opinions, but she kept her answers curt anyhow.

The newest subject was apparently sex, because hormones, and Nadine was complaining about her latest oral adventure. "It's just, it feels like I'm having my teeth gored." She said and some of the girls cringed. Helga rolled her eyes though. You're not supposed to use your teeth. She thought. Unless he's a masochist.

"I know what you mean. I feel like I'm being choked half the time." Rhonda agreed.

"It's odd." Sheena said somewhat shyly, but still interested in the subject. "I gag when I'm brushing my teeth, but not when I do that. How is that possible?"

"Are you sure it's not just because your toothbrush is bigger?" Helga suggested before she could stop herself. The girls laughed loudly and the boys behind them laughed too, while Sheena blushed and pushed playfully at the blonde's shoulder.

"What about you, Helga? What did you hate about it?" Rhonda sked. "If you ever did that to your ex-boyfriend that is."

It wasn't like a magical wall had appeared to divide the classroom in two just because the girls had decided to start such a conversation first thing in the morning. The boys could hear everything, especially since they wanted to, and Arnold's ears perked up when Helga's name was mentioned. Gerald patted his shoulder sympathetically, clearly expecting the blonde girl to soon crash his confidence.

"I don't mind it actually." Helga said casually. "In fact, I kinda like it."

The expression on Gerald's face was worth the embarrassment Helga had just inflicted on Arnold. The dark face looked like something that could put one of the dogs from The Tinderbox to shame and he was clearly annoyed with the snicker his best friend was making.

"You're kidding. What could you possibly like about it?" Rhonda asked with disturbance printed on her face.

"Think about it." Helga said with a smirk. "You are in complete control."

"What do you mean?" Lila asked with innocent curiosity and Helga could have sworn that she felt both the girls and the boys lean closer to her.

"Like I said; you're in control. You have complete power over the boy, that's an amazing feeling. It's you who decides how and when things are going to happen. Hell, if you're a little sadistic like me, you can really make him go crazy. And I don't care what you've heard; all men are a little masochistic and like to be teased in bed."

The girls all leaned to look at the boys questioningly and the boys coughed in silent confession, Sid muttered something about how his crush on Helga had just come back, and the girls looked at Helga with awe. "When you put it like that…" Nadine muttered and the girls nodded

"Were you sadistic to your ex-boyfriend?" Rhonda asked, this time honestly interested in the answer. Helga had a feeling that the ravenette respected women who were dominant in their relationships, no matter the kind.

Helga shrugged. "I am who I am… but I have a feeling he didn't mind when I was sadistic to him in bed." she insisted. "I let him get his revenge."

Arnold almost spluttered, but managed to keep his reaction down. Harold noticed though and bumped his elbow against the smaller boy's arm. "Thinking of Hilda?" he asked teasingly.

"Oh, yeah, Arnold! How is it going with Hilda?" Nadine asked curiously.

"Yeah, how is she with her mouth?"

"That's now what I meant, you pervert!" Nadine said and threw a paper ball at Sid.

"Well, it's what we want to know." Sid insisted and stuck his tongue out at Nadine who returned the gesture. "So, come on, man, spill the beans! If you won't let us meet her, least you can do is tell us about her."

"I'd be more than happy to tell you about her, Sid."

"Awesome!"

"Problem is that I don't kiss and tell." Arnold insisted, hoping a smug attitude would make the boys give up. He was wrong.

"We ain't talking about kisses, Arnold." Stinky teased though he seemed more innocently curious than Sid was.

"No, stop it!" Arnold insisted and shook his head in amusement. Please, Helga. Save me already. He thought just when he heard her say his name. Thank you.

"Just give in already."

Arnold looked at Helga in shock. "What?"

"They're not gonna give up until you say something." Helga pointed out and the others nodded eagerly.

You're kidding. Was all Arnold could think, but he had a feeling that she was right. He cleared his throat awkwardly. "Fine."

Sid fisted the air in triumph. "Yes! Give us the dirty details!"

"I'm not going into details!" Arnold hissed. "I… I'll only answer yes and no questions."

Sid groaned. "Fine. Is she good at it?"

"At what?"

"At giving head!"

Arnold groaned in embarrassment. "Y-Yes…" he finally replied and the girls snickered, Helga included though she seemed to try to hold some pride down as well.

"Does she like it?" Harold asked.

"How am I supposed to… I've never had to ask her, so I guess so."

"Was the first time good?" Stinky asked.

"Yes."

"How many times have you done it?" Nadine interfered.

"I've lost count." Arnold replied honestly and the boys hollered. "That's also not a yes or no question."

"Do you love her?" Sheena asked sweetly, obviously hoping he would say yes.

Arnold flinched as he felt everyone's curious eyes on him. He felt a blush creep up on his face; it was one thing to tell said girl in private, but to confess it in front of everyone made him feel shy. When he gave a tentative nod, the girls squealed and the boys hollered again.

"Man, you gotta les us meet her now! The girl Arnold loves." Harold teased, but the blonde boy just huffed.

"I would just love to meet her as well, Arnold, just ever so much." Lila agreed.

"Yeah, Arnold. Come on. You can bring her to the prom or something, can't you?"

Rhonda groaned and Arnold looked from Stinky to her, his eyes gradually increasing in size. "That's weeks away." Rhonda complained.

"So?" Sid countered and Arnold looked at him. "It'd be awesome if we could all meet her there."

"Yeah, Arnold. Bring her to the prom!"

"Yeah, come on!"

"Please."

"No. Stop it!" Arnold pleaded angrily to everyone's surprise, except Helga's. He was biting on his lower lip, hoping he could hold back the frustration he was feeling.

Of course he wanted that. Of course he wanted to openly introduce Helga as his girlfriend, invite her to the prom and shout to the world that he loved her. But that would be selfish. He wouldn't risk just his own happiness or Helga's, but the happiness of their parents as well. Things wouldn't be easier just because they didn't have to hide anymore. Quite the contrary, he was sure it could destroy everything.

Sid frowned. "What's the deal with this broad?"

"She's not a broad!"

"What's wrong with her?"

"There's nothing - - "

"There has to be or else you wouldn't hide her. Is she insufferable?"

"No."

"Insane?"

"No."

"Ugly then?"

"No." Arnold replied as if it was the stupidest question he had ever heard and Helga would have smiled at any other time.

"Then what?" Sid asked stubbornly.

Arnold looked between the faces of people he had known his entire life and felt a heartbreaking guilt hit him. His hand, which was fisted on his thigh under the table, was suddenly covered by another hand he recognized as Helga's.

When did it get to the point that I can recognize her hand…? Arnold wondered as he squeezed her hand under the table. "She… I, uh… Her family wouldn't like it if they knew she was dating me." He confessed. The best lie is a version of the truth. He remembered Helga telling him this when she quoted the book she had just finished reading.

Their peers looked at each other in confusion. "What do you mean?" Harold asked and put his hand on Arnold's shoulder.

"It's a long story." The blonde boy tried.

"We've got time."

"Actually, we don't." Helga pointed out and gestured at the wall-clock. "Mrs. Oah will be here in like a minute."

"Let's just end this conversation." Arnold requested.

"But you love her, don't you?" Sheena asked sadly. "Do you really want to hide your relationship?"

Arnold hesitated, unsure of what to say. "I just… don't want her to get hurt." He answered, praying he didn't sound as gloomy as he felt. He knew Helga was avoiding his gaze the same way he was avoiding hers when Mrs. Oah's voice broke the tense silence and the students moved to their designated seats. Arnold and Helga stayed where they were.

"Well… this was a fun day." Helga mumbled with a weak smile on her face.

"I'm sorry."

"N-No, I'm not blaming you. I blame them." Helga said. "Hopefully your story will keep them satisfied."

"I just wish I didn't have to lie to them." Arnold said, knowing what Helga would say. Now she is going to remind me that we can't do anything about it and tell me it's going to be ok. He told himself and waited for the words, but they never came.

"Me too."

Arnold stopped walking and stared at Helga in shock. That was the first time she had agreed with him, the first time she had said such words without arguing against him first or after and he wasn't sure what to think about it. That wasn't how it was supposed to happen; she was supposed to remind him why he was so positive all the time. Why wasn't she telling him it was stupid to worry?

Helga stopped walking as well and turned to look at him. Her blue eyes seemed bluer than usual as she walked back to him. He felt as if he was hypnotized by her as she put her hands on his shoulders, leaned closer and kissed him on his lips. He stood there, frozen in surprise, but as soon as the kiss had begun, it ended. Her hands fell from his shoulders and down his arms and she looked away, almost as if she was ashamed.

"Where… Where did that come from?" Arnold asked, without knowing what exactly he was referring to. Helga wetted her lips in thought and opened her mouth to speak, but then she changed her mind. She shook her head, silently telling him it was nothing important and took his hand. "H-Helga, what if someone sees - - "

"Just for a little bit." Helga requested in such a vulnerable voice that Arnold couldn't even consider denying her wish. He tangled his fingers with hers and noticed anew that it was a perfect fit. They walked in silence until they reached the house and Arnold noticed something on Helga's face that made his heart clench. She said his name softly and looked at him. "I've been thinking… Maybe we should - - "

"Surprise!"

Both blondes shrieked in surprise and stumbled back, unhooking their hands in the process. They stared at their parents who were standing with their hands and arms stretched far away from their bodies dramatically.

"What the - - "

"We're home early, darling." Miriam said and went to hug her daughter tightly.

"Yeah, a whole day early." Helga said in obvious shock as she tried to hug her mom back with same fervor, but she felt weak against her grip for once.

Arnold was in the middle of hugging his own dad, when he noticed to his horror that he was disappointed to see them. They weren't supposed to get home until the next day and he had looked forward to spend this last day in freedom with Helga. Now there was this awkward feeling hanging in the air and he had a feeling he would never find out what Helga had been about to say.

The blonde teenagers did their best to listen to their parents ramble about their honeymoon and appear half-interested in what they were saying. It wasn't until Miriam declared that she needed a nap before dinner that the family separated. Helga decided it was a good time to talk to Miles alone and gave Arnold a look she knew that he understood. He walked up on his own and Miles noticed that Helga was looking at him oddly.

"Is something on your mind, Helga?" Miles asked with a kind smile.

"Yes…" Helga said softly, trying desperately to hold back the anger she remembered feeling the day Miriam had called her in her drunken stupor. It was no good though; that memory along with her entire past as a child of an alcoholic made her unbelievably furious. The fact that this day had been frustrating enough to begin with didn't help. "I would like to know what you were thinking when you let a former alcoholic drink?"

Miles seemed surprised at Helga's question, but snickered without worry. "Oh, Helga. We were just having a few drinks."

"Yeah, that's the thing. It's never just a few drinks with an alcoholic." Helga hissed and crossed her arms. "I'm asking you again: what were you thinking?"

Miles' smile faded from his face. "I don't think that tone is necessary, Helga."

"I think it's more than necessary when you're talking to a person who clearly doesn't understand the mistake he's made."

Miles frowned. "Miriam and I had a couple of margaritas one night at our honeymoon, we didn't go on a drinking spree. We're adults, Helga, and you're the child so I will ask you to know your place."

Helga's eyes showed pure fury. "Know my place?!" she repeated.

Miles sighed. "Helga, you are a child! It's not your place to worry so much about your mother or about adult business. You're supposed to enjoy life to its fullest before you become an adult and don't have any choice but to worry about these things." He insisted kindly.

Helga felt her face start to tic in a mix of frustration and confusion. "Not worry? Excuse me! I'm 17-years-old! I am not some naïve little girl who lives in Fantasyland! I grew up with that woman, I've seen her passed out on more than one occasion, I had to take care of myself when I was a child, so don't you dare come here and play high-and-mighty with me!"

"Don't you raise your voice with me." Miles warned. "Your mother is fine, Helga. There's no need to worry. Arnold's not worried, why can't you follow his example?"

Helga flinched at that familiar feeling of being compared to a better sibling, but she shook it off. "So you think Arnold never worries?"

"He doesn't look like he worries."

Helga hummed in thought. "I guess that's how it would seem to someone who doesn't know him." She said angrily.

Miles' previously calm face went into one of rage and he stood up from the chair. "Excuse me? How dare - - "

"Look, Miles." Helga interrupted and stood up as well, putting her hands on the table between them. "I have full respect for what you and Stella did; you had to pay back the people who saved your lives and helped you bring Arnold to this world, but don't think that those years weren't hard for Arnold. He missed you, he had no idea whether you were alive or dead and if you think that because he wore a brave face that means he never worried about you, then you're even more stupid than I thought!"

Helga froze when she saw the pain she had inflicted on Miles. He stood across the table, frozen from her words and she looked away. She gulped, waiting for him to talk, but when he didn't, she sighed.

"Miles… you don't know what it's like to grow up without your parents or in a broken family, so don't try to tell me not to worry or think you know anything about this. I've seen my mom when she is at her lowest and I swear, if I see her like that again, just because you wanted to be young and stupid again, I'll never forgive you." Helga said and turned to walk away, but stopped to cast a look at him over her shoulder. "And don't let me hear you say again that Arnold never worries. That boy puts on a happy smile and always looks on the bright side, but he felt scared and alone too when you and Stella decided to leave him before he could even walk. Just keep that in mind."

With those words, Helga left Miles alone in the living room and stomped up the stairs. She didn't even consider going into her own room and threw the door to Arnold's room open. The blonde boy flinched and looked up from his phone.

"Your dad's an idiot."

Arnold blinked and put his phone away. "I take it the talk didn't go well?" he asked and Helga snorted in response. "What happened?"

"He had the balls to tell me to know my place! As if I'm not allowed to worry about my own mom!"

Arnold blinked in surprise. "Wait. What?"

"He said I'm a child and that I shouldn't have to worry about such things yet. Can you believe him?! I'm 17-years-old and he treats me like a fucking toddler! Who does he think he is? He has no idea what it's like to grow up with an alcoholic, to be afraid of bringing people home because she might be passed out some random place you can't explain or to wonder if she'll wake up again. And you! You he sees as this worry-free kid who never felt any trauma from being abandoned as a child! It's like he thinks there's no consequences to his actions!" Helga screamed and kicked the nearest thing nearby.

"Helga!" Arnold shouted and she froze. She looked at what her foot had just connected with and meekly put his skateboard back up against the wall. She looked at him for a moment, but then back at the floor.

"I'm sorry…" the blonde girl muttered in shame. Arnold stood up from his bed and put his arms around her. "I'm sorry." She repeated. "He's your dad. I… I shouldn't talk about him this way."

"No, Helga, I…" Arnold hesitated, but loosened his grip so he could look at her. "This just reminds me again that I… I still don't really know my dad that well."

"No, Arnold - - "

"No. It's the truth. He's been in my life for almost two years, but I still feel like I don't really know him. I guess that's natural, right? I didn't grow up with my dad so… maybe it's understandable that he sometimes feels like a stranger to me…" Arnold said with a sad smile, walked towards the bed again and sat down. The face he was making broke her heart. And she blamed herself for it. "But let's change the subject, ok? Mrs. Oah mentioned that anatomy test we'll soon have and I'm kinda nervous. Could you - - "

"Stop it." Helga pleaded and Arnold looked at her in surprise. There he goes again, putting on a brave face. She thought. "Don't do this… Don't pretend, not in front of me."

"What do you mean?" Arnold asked in genuine confusion.

"I just told Miles about how you always look at the bright side, but I know that's not the truth! You feel sad too, you worry and you get angry. Don't pull the bright side bullshit on me now! I have to know how you feel, Arnold. How do you feel?"

Arnold tried to smile. "You know how I feel about you - - "

"Not me, you dimwit! This whole situation!" Helga screeched. "What happened earlier today, our relationship, the hiding, the lies, the everything! Stop pretending everything is ok! I know you can't be Mr. Brightside all the time. Be honest with me!"

Arnold looked away and bit on the sensitive skin inside his mouth. A part of him wanted to insist that everything was ok and that he truly believed they could continue this way and stay happy. He decided he didn't want to do that to Helga; he knew she knew better than that. "I hate…" he started hesitantly. "I hate lying to our friends and our parents."

Helga nodded. "Good." She encouraged.

"I hate that I… that we can't go out on dates or go to the prom together… I hate that I panic when you do something as innocent as taking my hand out on the street and I hate that I have to feel ashamed of my feelings for you." Arnold finished. He could hear Helga move towards him and felt her sit down next to him on the bed. "And I hate that you made me say these things."

"I'm not gonna apologize."

"Didn't think you would." Arnold said and took a deep breath and noticed she did the same.

"How… How do you think this will end?" Helga asked despite not wanting to know the answer. She feared his theory and she wasn't sure if she wanted to know it. He looked at her for the first time since she had confronted him and she looked back. "What's the ideal scenario here? At this point, is there a chance of happy ending for anyone?"

"That's the thing… I'm not sure if there is an ideal solution to this." Arnold admitted timidly. He hated he couldn't give her a positive answer, but it was time to face the truth. There was no happy ending in the near future and now that their parents were back, it was only a matter of time before they would slip up.

The two blondes spend hours together in the boy's room, just chatting and playing games, basking in this peaceful moment they had together. It wasn't until it was 8pm that Helga noticed they hadn't been called down for dinner. "Maybe they forgot?" she suggested and stood up from the floor, dusting her legs off for any dirt there may have been. "I'll go downstairs, ok?"

"Sure." Arnold said with a smile and turned off his PlayStation while the blonde girl headed out. She smiled at him before she closed the door. When she looked down the hallway though, she saw her mother come up the stairs.

"Oh! Miriam, I - - " Helga started nervously and looked back at Arnold's door. "A-Arnold and I were just going through some homework and…" she continued, but stopped talking when she noticed that Miriam wasn't even looking at her. She stepped closer, but Miriam continued her way towards the bedroom. "Miriam? Can you even hear me?" she asked, but still no response. "Mom!"

Helga thought calling Miriam mom would have made her turn around, perhaps in shock. But the woman just went inside the bedroom and left her daughter in the hallway. Blue eyes blinked in surprise and the owner briefly considered continuing her way downstairs, but knocked on the bedroom door instead. She waited for a bit, but there was no answer and so she walked in without warning.

Miriam was sitting on the bed with her head hanging low. She finally seemed to notice Helga's presence when the girl crouched in front of her. "Mom, what's going on?"

Miriam blinked slowly. "Huh? Uh, no. What do you mean?"

"Don't give me that. You didn't even notice me out in the hallway!"

"Oh, sorry, sweetheart. I just have jetlag. I'm tired…"

"Is that all it is?" Helga asked hesitantly. She didn't believe that this was just tiredness, no way. Miriam's eyes were completely glazed, but there wasn't a hint of alcohol on her breath so she hadn't been drinking. She didn't reek of toothpaste or breath freshener either so she hadn't just brushed her teeth in an attempt to hide anything, but there was still something about her that seemed completely off.

"Of course, sweety. I-I think you and Arnold have to make your own dinner tonight though. Miles seems to be…" Miriam said, but Helga noticed how her voice cracked when she said her husband's name. "M-Miles seems to be tired as well."

"… Then why isn't he up here with you?"

Miriam looked like a deer that had been caught in the headlights, but she chuckled awkwardly and caressed her neck. "He wanted to give me a chance to fall asleep first. He's quite the snorer. I'm surprised you and Arnold have never woken up because of him. Then again, we are in separate rooms." She explained.

Helga wanted to keep asking. She wanted to question Miriam until she cracked and admitted what the hell was going on, but she felt herself stand up from the floor instead. "Ok. Sleep tight, Miriam." She said and let her palm graze Miriam's head for a short moment, hoping the gesture seemed kind rather than worried. If it really was nothing, she didn't want her mom to know she had worried for nothing.

"Goodnight, Helga." Miriam said in a hoarse voice and Helga heard her fall down on the bed. The blonde girl looked at her mother for a moment as the woman laid unceremoniously on the bed with her limps sprawled all around her as if she didn't know what else to do with them. Helga closed the door softly behind her, but she stayed leaned up against it for a moment.

Something's definitely wrong… Did Miles say something to her? She wondered and looked at the stairs. She took two slow steps towards it before it turned into a jog. When she stepped down on the first step though, she froze. She wasn't sure why it was, but she had the sudden urge to tip-toe. In my own house? She wondered in disbelief and shook her head. She walked carefully down the stairs, making sure not to make a sound as she got near the living room.

Helga had no idea what she had expected to see; probably Miles sitting in his chair and reading a book, everything all as usual, but that wasn't what she saw. Miles was indeed sitting in his usual chair, but it wasn't a book he was holding in his hands. It was a picture frame, but Helga was too far away to see who it was a picture of. Nervously, she stepped all the way up to the wall separating the hallway from the living room and tried to squint her eyes until she could see who he was looking at.

Helga made a shaky, but silent gasp when she recognized the person on the photo. Miles suddenly put his hand up to his face, hiding, but she could hear his tears. Helga was shaking at this point and she wanted to let go of the wall before she'd accidentally crack it, but she feared that she would collapse to the ground if she didn't hold onto something.

Helga could hear something to her right, but she didn't look. It was Arnold who was coming down the stairs and was saying her name softly. He quickly realized that she was too absorbed in what she was looking at to notice him so he continued his way down the stairs. When he reached her, he was about to ask her what was wrong, but instead looked to his right and into the living room.

Miles' shoulders were shaking as he continued to look at the photo. "Why did you have to die…? I'm a mess without you. I can't do anything right… You always knew what to do, but I can't do anything… I don't know what to do, Stella. I thought giving Arnold a mom would make everything alright, but nothing is alright. I still don't know what to do without you…" he whispered to the picture and held it close to his chest.

Arnold breathed for the first time since he saw his dad sit with the picture of Stella in his hands. It hurt to breathe, but he ignored that pain. Arnold put his hand on Helga's shoulder, shaking her to life. She looked at him as if she hadn't noticed him until now and accepted his hand when he offered it to her. The blondes walked up the stairs and eventually went into Arnold's room. He closed the door behind them and looked at Helga's back as she stood in the middle of the room.

Arnold didn't know what to say, to feel or think. Was it even necessary to say anything at all? Was one feeling more right than the other and weren't his thoughts just one big mess anyway? When Helga turned around to look at him, he looked at her as well. The seemingly mannequin-like expression on her face crumbled and contorted into one of sorrow. Without a word, they grabbed desperately for each other and fell to their knees.

Arnold's face was pressed into Helga's neck as she held onto him with all her might, shaking like a leaf. "I'm sorry… I think I fucked everything up." She said in a voice that sounded like a broken record and cried in the blonde tuffs of hair. He clenched his teeth and tightened his hold around her hips. His dad was right; nothing was alright.

Author's 2nd note: Eh… don't hate me? That was one helluva change from the Easter chapter to this, huh? And it's only gonna get worse! No, that's a lie. Or is it? *wink-wink* Who knows? Only I! *Evil laugh* Anyways! I hope this quickly written chapter makes up for how tardy I was with the former :P Even if it wasn't nearly as happy xD