WARNING: This chapter contains possible triggers. I've tried to keep it as mild as I possibly can but that being said I apologize in advance for any offense it may cause.

Sharp amethyst eyes gazed at her, a warm smile on his pale slender face seemed fake and forced. To most he seemed like a handsome, loyal man, but to her he was a snake waiting for the right time to strike.
"It seems as though Mr. Michaelis is quite adept at anything he does." he commented as they watched Sebastian force feed his curry to those affected by the curryma. Lucile, having been ordered by Ciel to protect the Queen, risked a side glace at the man in white beside her. Ash Landers. He served as the voice and aide to Queen Victoria, but there were no records of what he did before hand.
"I wonder at what else he's skilled in." Ash continued cryptically, the tone of his voice indicated a secret, special meaning. Lucile frowned,
"What exactly are you implying, sir?" she asked in a tone that was impolitely polite. Ash chuckled quietly,
"I think you're aware of what I'm implying, Miss Conte. There's no doubt in my mind that you don't." Lucile stiffened when she felt his gloved hand dance across her back lightly. Her jaw tightened, her stomach churned at his touch,
"Mr. Landers, if you wish to keep your hand I suggest you remove it from my back." she said darkly. Ash leaned in close to whisper in her ear, her skin prickled as his breath met her flesh and she resisted the urge to recoil from him,
"Miss Conte, I surely hope that wasn't a threat against the Queen's aide. As you know, such an act is a crime against the Crown and is punishable by death." he whispered. Lucile quickly rethought her strategy; he was right after all.
"I prefer to think of it as a polite suggestion." she said quickly and quietly, her golden eyes scanning the crowd for any kind of rescue. Ash chuckled again,
"If that's the case, I respectfully..." his voice dropped several octaves, "Decline."
"Lucile!" Ciel's voice rang out loud and clear, "You can stand down." Lucile let out a breath of relief and stepped away from the hateful man.
"Good day, Mr. Landers." she said before curtsying to the Queen, "Your Majesty."
"Good day, Miss Conte." Ash said with a slight nod of his head and a devilish smirk. Lucile quickly turned on her heel and pushed her way through the crowd to get back to her master.

"That man is disgusting." she growled as she stomped back and forth in the kitchen. Bard was sitting at the table reading his newspaper, a cigarette dangling from his mouth just listening to her rant on about how much she hated him.
"He's not that bad." Bard replied distantly. Lucile threw her hands skyward in exasperation, "He's a perverted, sly bastard!"
"Perverted?" that had caught Bard's attention. He lowered the newspaper and looked to Lucile for clarification, "Who's perverted?"
"Ash goddamn Landers." she hissed sitting at the opposite end of the table. Bard's brows shot up,
"The Queen's man?"
"Yes, Baldroy. Who do you think I've been talking about for the past hour?" she muttered in annoyance. Bard scratched the back of his head and smiled from embarrassment,
"Honestly, I thought you were talking about Sebastian." he confessed. Lucile rolled her eyes and leaned against the chair, "No," she replied and then added under her breath, "Although he's not much better." Lucile now had Bard's full attention, he held his cigarette between his index and middle finger, absently flicking the ash into the tray and stared into her eyes.
"What exactly did he do, Miss Lucile?"
Lucile huffed and stared at a crack in the floor, "He didn't do anything exactly. It was what he implied." Bard arched an eyebrow in confusion and waited for some kind of clarification from Lucile. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, saying it out loud made her sound ridiculous and petty. In truth he hadn't physically done anything to her - at least nothing worse than things Sebastian had done - but his words, their hidden meaning, the sly tone of his voice and his very presence sickened her. But how could she explain that in a way that made sense? In the end, Lucile just decided it would be best to keep her discomfort to herself. What could Bard do about a situation she couldn't handle herself, anyway?
"Forget I said anything, Bard." she told him standing up and stretching.
"Miss Lucile?" he asked curiously as he watched her leave. Lucile didn't reply, instead she just closed the kitchen door and wandered up to her room to start packing her things. Now that the murder mystery was over and all the villains apprehended or otherwise, they would be heading home soon. A soothing calm filled her as she climbed the stairs. Her desk, her one piece of sanctuary in the world was calling to her. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath almost as if she could smell the polished oak and the musky leather from the chair. All her happy memories were etched into the desk's surface, carved deep into the wood. She could go there and all her problems and bad days would just wash away. She was free from Sebastian, free from duty, free from everything except herself there.
"What are you doing?" his voice snapped her out of her pseudo-happiness instantly. Lucile opened her golden orbs and glared at the handsome demon in front of her, peering down at her curiously behind long eyelashes.
"Fantasizing about kicking you down the stairs." she replied with a brilliant, innocent smile. Sebastian did his eyebrow thing morphing his face into an expression that was equally attractive and not impressed and just blinked at her, waiting for a real answer. Lucile dropped her act and leaned agains the bannister, folded her arms and stared at her feet. Guarding her thoughts against him was getting more and more difficult these days, "Fine, if you must know I was daydreaming about home."
"Home? Where that slobbering, uncultured thing is?" he asked in disbelief. Lucile pursed her lips, "Well, yes. I miss my desk..."
"I've been meaning to ask you about your fascination with that thing is." Sebastian stated shifting the silver platter to under his other arm subconsciously. Lucile glanced back up at him,
"Is this you asking now?"
"I suppose it is."
She rolled her eyes at him and looked down at the foyer suddenly embarrassed to be sharing her secrets with the man she was supposed to hate, and yet he knew more about her than she probably did.
"It's my treasure." she said quoting Undertaker, "It's the one item I hold most dear in the entire mansion."
"Why?" he asked. She turned back to him and stared straight into his crimson eyes, "It contains my entire happiness. That's all I wish to say on it right now." With that, she pushed off the bannister and stepped around the demon, continuing her ascent to the second floor.

Her happiness? Sebastian thought as he folded Ciel's clothes neatly and stacked them into the open suitcase absently, Isn't her happiness Ciel? Perhaps he was looking too deep into her words but if he knew Lucile as well as he did, and he liked to think that was the case, then there was more to what she'd said. He was certain Ciel Phantomhive was the only person Lucile loved, truly loved, in the entire world. She would do anything for him even subconsciously. That much was proven when she'd attacked and killed Angelina Dalles to protect him. So did that not also make the boy her happiness as well?
Sebastian groaned internally and closed the suitcase - women were insufferably confusing. He didn't even know why he bothered, especially with this one.
That was a lie. He knew why he put up with her; Lucile Conte stirred something within him. Something he hadn't yet figured out. At the moment he was just assuming it was something akin to desire and lust, she was a very beautiful woman after all, but the words he'd spoken the last time they fought, those same words he'd told her when she had regained her memory, still haunted him. Why had he said he cared for her? He didn't believe those words were actually his, yet he'd said them without hesitation.
Sebastian rapped his fingers against the leather case while he thought then, when he realized what he was doing, made a fist and shook his head. His mind had been so over the place recently he hadn't even picked up on Agni being in the middle of the whole situation until the khansama left. But Lucile had known he was suspicious. He smirked to himself, he was losing his edge to a wolf. How pathetic.
"What are you doing to me, woman?" he asked aloud and gazed in her general direction. He may not have known what emotion was wrecking havoc on his psyche but he was aware that his attempts at getting to her, making her succumb to him, was becoming more than just a game to see if he could actually bed Lucile. It was fast turning into an obsession for him. The more she resisted, the more his thirst for her grew. It would make breaking her that much sweeter tasting, and yet, though he could easily persuade her to give in if he really wanted to, he never pushed when she declined his advances. His new tactic of being somewhat aloof and disinterested in her was slow and boring, but it seemed to be yeilding a different kind of fruit. Lucile seemed to be starting to trust him more than she did when he first met her three years ago, though it wasn't trust he wanted from her. Still, he found himself liking the feeling of being trusted and needed by her. A feeling that further proved his warping mental state.
Sebastian sighed and sat on the edge of Ciel's bed, knotting his gloved fingers between his knees and stared at the carpet deciding to take a moment to think. When exactly had his psyche begun to twist so drastically? Was it a side effect from years of starvation? Or was he just going insane? A red hot wave of anger rose in his chest - why was he the only one cursed to suffer this hell? That woman, Lucile Conte, should be forced to feel his agony as well and learn just what it was that he was dealing with inside. But how could he possibly make her see? There were many things he could do as both a man and a demon and yet this, showing a woman who hated him the emotions he didn't even understand that were warring within him, this was impossible.
A soft rapping at the door disturbed the demon from his thoughts and he stood, smoothed his jacket and pants and made himself presentable before beckoning the knocker to enter. Her scent made his head swim, just like it always did, and he fought to keep his composure.
"Sorry to disturb you." her voice was a sweet lance of bells right through his chest - damn it, he shouldn't have been over thinking things before, everything she did was amplified now.
"It's fine, I was just finishing up." he said gesturing to the closed suitcase on the bed, "Is something the matter?" His eyes never left her figure as she floated past him to the large window and peered down at the snow covered cobblestones. If he had a soul he would have sworn it was trying to separate itself from him just to touch her. Sebastian clenched his fists as an attempt to keep his hands under control and then frowned, finding the action confusing. Why was he purposely trying to control himself? He had never done such a thing in the past so why should he care so much now?
"Well...actually I wanted to ask your opinion on something." she said with a coy smile. Sebastian was floored. This creature in front of him, standing awkwardly with her hands folded behind her back could rival the beings humans called Angels. He dug his nails into the palm of his hand immediately after the thought had appeared in his mind. There was something wrong with him, very, very wrong.
"Of course." he replied and turned his back to her. Suddenly, now that she was no longer in his sights, he felt more himself than when she'd walked in the room. He blinked his long lashes at the ground, finally realizing that what was wrong wasn't within him but it was her. He was still the same but something had changed within Lucile and had caused him to react in ways he never thought were possible.
"How much do you know about Ash Landers?" she asked. The name was familiar to Sebastian, Ash Landers was English Queen's aide and had been present, along with her, at the curry making tournament. Before then, however, Sebastian had never met him and until now had never even thought of him.
"Not very much, I admit. Why?" he asked turning to face Lucile once again. She had turned side on and was looking out of the window again only this time the ground didn't have her attention.
"Yesterday when Ciel ordered me to guard the Queen..." she shook her head, "I don't know why I'm telling you this. Forget I said anything." Lucile ducked her head and started walking across the room to the open door, but Sebastian moved to intercept her, standing between her and the door.
"Something is clearly upsetting you, Lucile." he said calling her by her first name and closing the door behind him, "Tell me." Lucile's expression morphed into the one she made when she was about to argue with him, but it only lasted a moment and she lowered her gaze as if accepting his order for once.
"Whenever I try to explain it it just sounds ridiculous." she said and then fell silent. Sebastian wondered whether she was going to elaborate or whether he was going to have to force it out of her, but she spoke in the end. "There's something off about him, I can't quite place it but they way he spoke and the vibe I got off him were unpleasant to say the least."
"Did he threaten you?" he asked curiously. Lucile shook her head and turned away from him again,
"Quite the opposite actually...I think he was flirting with me. Some of the things he was saying were definitely implying that kind of thinking anyway..."
Cold rage froze Sebastian's blood and the only thought going through his mind was various ways to kill Ash Landers before he got his hands on Lucile.
"I've had men say worse things to me than he did. You've said things far more vulgar, but no one has ever made me feel as repulsed as him." Sebastian paused his thoughts of manslaughter when she said that. Lucile hadn't mentioned any details but it had sounded as though Landers was polite if not gentlemanly in his advances, yet she claimed he was worse than Sebastian who had all but taken the girl against her will. Curious.
"So it was a feeling that you have about him, not anything he actually did, is that correct?" he asked. He knew that the way he'd worded it made it sound like he didn't believe her, but he'd done that on purpose. Lucile's nose was sharp and her intuition was sharper still. If she felt uneasy around Ash Landers then that could only mean bad news. Lucile pouted childishly though the action only made her look more stunning to him and folded her arms over her chest. She was annoyed.
"This was why I didn't want to tell you in the first place!" she snapped, "I knew you'd think I was being over dramatic. Look, think what you want but Ash Landers isn't who he pretends to be." Lucile pushed past him, her body pressing against his for a short moment was like 100,000 volts of electricity passing through every nerve ending in his body.
"I'll prove it even if I have to do it alone." she continued once she was out the door, "I'll prove that he's something worse than you."
Sebastian watched her leave, privately enjoying the way her hips swayed side to side, however her words stuck with him. It should have had some kind of effect on him, especially when coming from her, but he had the feeling that she didn't mean them the way they came out. He smiled to himself and returned to his duties; what he didn't tell Lucile was that although he'd only met Ash Landers that day, he also didn't like the handsome man in white.

"Lucile." His voice was like opium smoke, swirling in blue-gray clouds around her, calling to her very soul. She hated and loved him like a drug addiction. He was a perfect calamity, beautiful and cruel like a storm with no destination, destroying everything in its path yet painting the sky the most stunning shades of green and purple. Lucile fluttered open her eyes and gazed at the indescribable beauty standing naked before her. He smiled a smile that would make the world melt, his crimson eyes held only a whisper of his true diabolical nature and yet even if you knew it, you would be incapable of holding it against him. He was the purest of evil in the skin of a God. And she hated and loved him.
Sebastian tilted his head to the side and extended a slender hand out to her. Lucile started to reach for him but something held her back. Sebastian smiled sweetly again, "Even inside a dream you're so unwilling to give yourself to me. Am I so repulsive to you?"
Lucile shook her head, her long, wavy hair spilled over her shoulders and rested just above her breasts, "No, you're not the abhorrent one. You're a demon born from hatred and sin, I can't hate you for doing what's in nature."
"Then why do you deny me?" he asked. Lucile lowered her gaze, "Because I'm the one who's obscene for loving you the way I do."
"You love me?" Sebastian's expression stayed neutral but there was surprise in his voice, "You hate me."
"I hate you because I love you." she told him and somehow she didn't have to look at him to know what face he was making. It started out small, a slight twitch at the corners of his mouth, a glimmer in his crimson eyes until he was smiling his beautiful secret smile.
"Why are you smiling like that?" she asked him. Sebastian laughed, it was like one thousand mockingbirds all harmonizing with a newborn sun.
"I'm smiling because I'm happy." he replied, "I'm happy because you said you love me." He pressed his hand to his bare chest, "My heart feels like a supernova continuously exploding. I've never experienced anything like this in my life before. Lucile, please share this with me, I'm afraid it will go away if you reject me again."
"Sebastian..." she whispered, his name poured from her lips like a prayer. She wanted him, she wanted to love him and be loved by him. She wanted to accept him, give herself to him and know what it was like to have him inside her, to be one with him. If only he could love her.
Lucile took a step forward and then another and another, moving ever closer to the unattainable man just within her grasp. And then something cold wound its way across her abdomen, stopping her from advancing further. She gazed down, it was an arm as pale as her own skin. Frowning, she looked back up to Sebastian for information but he continued to smile brilliantly at her, his hand outstretched towards her. She tried to push against the arm but it held her securely, she clawed at it trying to pry it off but it wouldn't budge. The arm tightened and Lucile found herself suddenly being dragged backwards and away from Sebastian. His face had morphed into confusion now that he had noticed the arm.
"Sebas-" her cry for help was cut off by another hand slithering across her face and clamping down on her mouth. She was being pulled faster now and Sebastian was running to catch up, horror etched into his features. What on earth was happening. She watched, unable to do anything as Sebastian fell further and further behind until he was completely gone. Something cool and hard pressed against her back.
"My, my," a new but familiar voice cooed, sending chills of fear down Lucile's spine. The cool thing behind her moved when the voice spoke, "It's seems Mr. Michaelis isn't all that adept at everything, now does it?" Lucile squirmed and writhed, trying everything she could to get free but his grip on her was iron.
"It's funny," he said breathing ice cold air against her neck, "How could someone so terrible evoke such warmth and love from you and yet I, his opposite, cannot?" His hand moved from her mouth, a finger trailing the outline of her lips before pushing into her mouth. Lucile winced as he prodded and poked her tongue, saliva dripping from her mouth.
"You are so very beautiful when you make that face, Lucile." He turned her in his arms so he could look at her better, his sharp amethyst eyes peircing her flesh in approval and whimsy, "I wonder what other delightful expressions you can make?" Tears formed in her eyes when his fingers lightly danced across thighs, up and up until they brushed against the soft, untamed flesh there.
"Now, now," Ash said disapprovingly, "I haven't even started ravaging you yet." Lucile whimpered in pain and fear as he parted her flesh and forced his finger deep inside her. She didn't want this - not with him, never with him! Her stomach churned when she felt him swirl his finger around. She used all of her strength to try and push him away, claw at his chest, everything, but it was futile. She was like a gentle breeze against a mountain. Ash laughed at her discomfort,
"If you're like this now, I can't wait to see how you react with this inside you!" As if she had no control over her own eyes, Lucile's gaze dropped to the long, thick appendage getting stiffer by the second between Ash's legs. She shook her head and tried fighting against him again. Her hands were being bound by her side by invisible ropes, she pushed and pushed and pushed against them until she managed to somehow get her right hand free. Without a moment's hesitation she punched Ash right in the jaw. The grin that had been on his face faltered then grew wider and more demonic. He laughed, "Excellent! Excellent! Oh Lucile, it's that defiance that makes breaking you so much sweeter!" Ash put his hands on her shoulders and suddenly she was being forced onto her back, she fought right up until she felt him press against her and a sharp stabbing pain rippled through her body, ripping and tearing as he forced himself deeper into her. Lucile screamed, tears streaming down her face. He paused for a fraction of a second and then he was sliding out of her. Lucile thought that it was over, that he'd had his fun but when she felt him ram against her so hard his hips smacked against her own, she realized that the hell was just starting. She twisted and tried to crawl away from him. He let her get a certain distance before he pulled her roughly back against him. She felt as though he was going to burst through her intestines and with each thrust, more of her spirit died until her will completely died out. Ash laughed all the while she cried, pounding mercilessly into her until he was spent. Lucile couldn't be sure, but at one point it sounded as if he had two voices.

Lucile sat bolt up on her desk, sweaty and clutching her abdomen. She could still hear Ash laughing in her mind and feel the agony he had inflicted upon her in the nightmare. It had been two weeks since their first and last encounter and this was the first time she'd ever had such a nightmare involving him. Slowly and shakily, she swung her legs over the edge of the desk and slid off, moving silently to the large window. There was no moon that night and storm clouds covered the stars. If the moon would be no comfort, perhaps the kitchen would be. Quietly, Lucile made her way down the dark hallways until she reached the kitchen. She frowned when she saw the warm yellow glow of light from under the door. Someone was awake. For a moment she hesitated, what if whoever was awake asked her what was wrong? Deciding she needed tea more than anything else right then, Lucile opened the door. Sebastian was sitting at the little table, a newspaper covering his face but he lowered it when he heard the creaking of the door opening. Upon seeing her face he frowned,
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." she replied too quickly as she moved to where they kept the tea. He stayed silent while she boiled the water, finished preparing the tea and brought it to the table. Lucile stared into the dark brown liquid trying to do everything in her power to forget what she'd just dreamed, but the hole being scorched into her by Sebastian's gaze told her she wasn't going to get off that easily.
"Please stop staring at me." she said taking a sip of tea.
"Not until you tell me the truth. Why are you down here?" he badgered her again. Lucile sighed and realized she was too worn out, physically and mentally, to argue with him.
"I had a nightmare, that's all." she replied with a half shrug and moved to take another sip of tea, but Sebastian held his hand over the rim of her cup, preventing her from drinking. His gaze was stern and sharp,
"The look on your face when you walked in here tells me otherwise. I don't doubt it was a nightmare, but don't try to pass it off as nothing." he said forcing her to lower her cup to the table. She sighed and gazed at his hand still on her teacup, he wasn't wearing his gloves so the Faustian contract seal on his left hand was visible. Lucile had seen it before but she'd never paid close attention to it until now. It was beautiful in a way and much less intricate that the Lycan mark on her shoulder.
"I'll tell you on one condition." she said still gazing at his hand.
"Go on?"
"You won't make a fuss about it." she finished immediately. Sebastian retracted his hand and interlocked his fingers together, placing them on the table before him,
"I can't promise anything, but I will try." he told her. Lucile leaned against the back of the chair, she wasn't totally satisfied with his answer but it would suffice. Where should she start her story? The beginning? She blushed when she remembered Sebastian standing naked in front of her and all the things she'd told him in her dream. No, she could leave that part out. But Ash...She could tell him what Ash had said.
"Back at the curry tournament, Mr. Landers had made a comment about you being able to do basically everything. He didn't mean it as a compliment but rather implying that you and I shared a..." she took another breath and wondered why she was being so formal all of a sudden, "He suggested we'd slept together. Anyway, my nightmare was about him. I was in this empty place where everything was white, you and I were talking about nothing important and then suddenly I was being dragged away. It was Ash Landers. He started saying all these strange things about opposites and light and dark and then he..." Lucile trailed off, unable to speak the words that were burning on her tongue. Sebastian's fine brows knitting together as he regarded her curiously,
"He what, Lucile?" he asked uncharacteristically gentle, "What did he do to you?" Lucile dug her nails into the wood as the vivid memory of everything he'd done to her in her dream replayed in her mind.
"He..." she half choked half sobbed, "He..." She couldn't say it. Even if it was a dream, it felt real. Every touch, every agony, it was real to her. She hadn't realized she was crying until her face was buried in Sebastian's vest, his scent enveloping her as he gently smoothed her hair and spoke calming nonsense in a low, soothing voice like she was a baby. It was oddly comforting.
"You don't have to say anything else." he told her once she'd calmed down, "Dream or not, I won't let him lay a finger on you again." Lucile pushed out of Sebastian's arms and, after wiping her eyes, stared at him trying to figure him out.
"Why?" she asked, "Why do you keep saying and doing things so out of character?" He reached toward her and tucked loose hairs behind her ear,
"Because," he said standing up, "Until you've surrendered to me, I won't tolerate anyone else causing you pain or putting their mark on you."

Yay, have a thing.