Chapter 11: Guests
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Edward
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It was just a week after Carlisle and Esme's impromptu engagement when I heard the car roll up into our driveway. Esme came rushing out of the kitchen where she had been nervously working on her sewing projects. She was in the middle of making a quilt for her co-worker from some of the cloth left over from decorating the house. Carlisle put down his book and smiled at her patiently.
"Relax, Esme. They'll love you," he said. He stood and placed a quick kiss on the top of her head and a reassuring hand on her back. I stood in the doorway of my room and waited. I listened to our guests.
Tanya was excited to see me again. I had been quite young the first time she met and she was curious to know what I was like now that I was less wild. I flinched at seeing myself in her memory, temperamental with thirst and jumpy with my new sense of hearing. It had been a hard adjustment.
Irina was calm and resigned. She'd taken the news of Carlisle's engagement well considering she had hoped to persuade him to be her mate, at least temporarily. She was hoping that Esme would be too wonderful to compete with so she felt less personally wounded by the rejection. Childishly she wanted Esme to be detestable so she would feel less guilty for her unkind thoughts toward my mother.
Kate was hopeful as she had been when Carlisle introduced me to the Alaskan coven. She was happy for any new additions to our little family, even extended family. For so long she and her sisters had been the only ones they knew willing to live off animals and she resented the isolation even if she preferred the diet.
The last two minds that I touched were new to me.
"They're not alone," I told Carlisle. "They brought friends."
He looked puzzled and apprehensive and tightened his hold on Esme.
You'll let me know if there's anything to worry about? He asked me. I nodded.
The unfamiliar minds were calm and each, to my surprise, thought as often in Spanish as they did in English. As I'd found with other foreigners before, much of thought was not language based and I could get an understanding of the meaning even if some of the words were unknown to me. Usually it was easier if the person knew some English and it seemed these two were fluent in both languages.
The male was calm and composed. He was interested to meet others of our kind and mostly curious about Carlisle though I couldn't quite understand why from his thoughts.
The woman was excited. She had enjoyed the drive through Canada, the vast wildernesses, the stunning natural formations and the beautiful landscapes that they had seen. She was comparing it in her mind to what she had seen of Europe. She was distracted as the group got out of the car but our little house. How pintoresco! She thought, in love with the place at first glance. Esme had artfully painted parts of the trim alternatively a sedate tan and bright white to accent shapes in the house's architecture. I had never noticed but this Spanish woman appreciated every detail. Through her eyes I gained a new appreciation for Esme.
Tanya knocked on the door, politely and waited for me to open it. I knew Carlisle wasn't anxious to leave Esme's side with strangers arriving and I was happy to put myself between them and my mother even if their thoughts were not hostile.
"Edward," Tanya said happily, noting my changed demeanor. "It's good to see you."
"And you Tanya, Kate, Irina," I said, greeting each as they entered. I saw through my mothers eyes what they looked like in their stylish fur lined jackets. The three tall, blond Russian sisters looked like models stepping out of a magazine to her, in their stylish clothes. She felt small and common in their presence but I was proud to see she kept this off her face.
Each of the three sisters looked my mother down in turn. Tanya noted the way Carlisle was standing beside her protectively and how she was turned toward him. She was relieved to see Esme's innocent air. Tanya knew what had passed between Aro and my father and she had always worried after that his kindness and forgiving nature would let him be manipulated. Esme disarmed all those fears with her tentative, self-conscious smiles.
Kate saw Esme's smile and returned it in her own cautious way. She noted Esme's conservative dress and the light colored cheerful pattern. She looks so sweet and motherly, Kate thought, but then again Carlisle always had a paternal nature even if we are three times as old as he is. I guess she's well suited to him then but I will have to take her shopping eventually. Kate was thus decided that Esme would be her friend.
Irina, half expecting an angel incarnate, was caught off guard by Esme. My small, dark haired, common looking (among vampires) mother was not what she pictured. She saw my mother in the house decorated to reflect the style of her clothes and hair: homey. Irina saw in a moment that she'd never had a chance with Carlisle because she'd never been what he wanted. It still hurt and her thoughts were not as warm as her sister's towards my mother but she was eased a little by the knowledge.
"It's good to see you again," Carlisle said, kissing the back of Tanya's hand with his gentlemanly smile. "Might I introduce my betrothed, Esme. These are the Denali sisters."
"It's wonderful to meet you," Tanya said.
"Welcome," Kate said, taking Esme's hand and giving a brief smile and her hand a soft squeeze. I heard Esme note the effort that Kate seemed to be giving, realizing very astutely that Kate was not one to show off her emotions.
"It's wonderful to finally meet you," Irina said with a brilliant smile that revealed none of her inhibitions.
"Thank you," Esme said with an equal smile. So this is Irina, I heard her thinking with an internal sigh of jealousy. How do I compete with this? Maybe I should get Carlisle's eyes checked. I held back a chuckle at her little joke. It was harder when she met my eyes and I knew it had been just for me. I felt a surge of gratitude for having her in my life.
The Spanish couple—because they were clearly a mated pair—was waiting politely on the porch to be invited in. The male had his arm around his mate much like Carlisle was standing beside Esme. I heard in his thoughts how careful he was about encroaching on another vampire's territory. We were territorial creatures after all. He was also focused on me.
What a rare and powerful gift. To be so attuned to those around him, he must have been something special even as a human. I wonder how specific his perception of thoughts is, he thought, his gaze meeting mine. I was surprised to find that his eyes, and his mates, were gold like ours.
"Carlisle," Tanya said, glancing outside to the waiting couple, "we hope you don't mind but we had guests with us when your letter arrived. They were interested in trying our lifestyle and we've been enjoying their company for the past six months."
I stepped back from the door more than I had for Tanya's family and motioned for the strangers to come inside.
"This Eleazar and his mate, Carmen," Tanya introduced them. I caught the flare of recognition in Carlisle's mind and the male's face, Eleazar's face flashed in his memory, but with crimson irises where now were gold. He was cautious thought because of who accompanied Eleazar in his memory. I knew Aro's face from other less pleasant memories my father had accidentally shared with me.
"We've met before actually," Eleazar said and held out a hand to Carlisle.
"Yes, in Voltera," my father shook the offered hand nonetheless.
"Like you I tired of Aro's company but not quite as quickly. Then again he never showed so much interest in me as he did in you," Eleazar said, revealing that he knew of more than just my father's passing visit to Voltera.
"I don't believe you had a mate when last we met," Carlisle said, shifting the subject.
"No, I met Carmen some time after you left and it became apparent that I loved her more than I did my work in Italy. We came to America to find a new life for ourselves."
"This life suits us well," Carmen said, speaking up for herself. "I'm surprised that more of our kind have not seen the benefits. It's an honor to meet you after everything that Eleazar has told me about you."
"The pleasure is mine," Carlisle said. "This is Esme and my son, Edward." I caught the metal raised eyebrow that Carmen and Eleazar had to the relation Carlisle gave me to him.
"Yes," Eleazar said, "the sisters told me about him and his gift but I hardly believed it until I saw it."
"You saw it?" Carlisle asked. What did he see? Edward has been very inconspicuous. I answered for Eleazar. If they knew of my talent there was no reason not to show off a little.
"He sees the gifts of others, vampires and humans before they are changed. That's why Aro had you introduced. He wanted to see if you had any particular talent that made you so resistant to human blood."
Carlisle raised an eyebrow. I had thought that might be a possibility but Aro never mentioned anything to me.
"I didn't see anything. I can only conclude that your commendable self control is all your own," Eleazar said with a smile. I could see through his mind the way he saw talents in others. To him they appeared like an aura around a person. I had my own 'color' that seeped out around me. Kate's 'color' was close to her skin and fizzed where my was stagnant but responsive to every passing mind. Irina, Tanya, Carlisle, Carmen and Esme each had their own auras, though they were subtler and harder to distinguish. I did notice that there was a similar quality in my parents' auras. I wondered what that meant but Eleazar had no more idea than I did.
"Is it too much to assume you decorated the house?" Carmen asked, pulling me out of my examination of Eleazar's mind. She was speaking to Esme.
"Yes, I did. I wasn't quite ready to be out in society when we first moved, and I like to make myself useful as much as I can."
"It's beautiful," Carmen said with a sigh. "I've never truly had a home to decorate and I'm sure I wouldn't have the patience but I do love what you've done here."
"Thank you." Esme said, glowing under the praise. Seeing our home through Carmen's eyes made me realize how much I had taken Esme's touch on the house for granted.
"Well you are both welcome in our home," Carlisle said to the Spanish couple, "though with so many guests it feels rather small."
"It's a good thing we don't sleep," Kate said with a smirk and everyone chuckled. I shut the door with a small smile on my face. It seemed that Esme would fit herself effortlessly into our family after all.
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Esme
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As soon as the house was out of earshot (vampire earshot) Tanya practically turned on me, her eyes alight with the released curiosity that I had seen bottled up in her since they had arrived. Somehow I had been coerced into this shopping trip to Albany even though I suspected the real purpose. I was still glad Edward had slipped me a little written warning of what was coming. It was still crumpled up in my pocket and as I prepared for the onslaught I remembered what it said:
Mom, Tanya has a million prying questions almost all of which are inappropriate. Kate just wants to know if both of you are happy. Irina is trying to like you, really. –Edward.
"So, how did you meet Carlisle?" Tanya asked. "Did you sweep him off his sensibly shoed feet?"
"Tanya!" Kata scolded from the driver's seat. Irina looked back at me with a guarded look from the passenger seat then turned to look at the road.
"Oh, hush," Tanya said with a wave of her hand toward the front of the car. "I want to know the details! He's been a bachelor for two centuries. I want to know what changed his mind."
"Looking for tips?" Kata asked.
"No, what could he teach me? Let me guess," Tanya said, turning back to me, I sent Kata thankful look in the rearview mirror, "he's a terrible kisser."
I was very glad that they couldn't see me blushing or the way my heart was pounding. Carlisle had found a moment last night in the forest as we hunted to hold me in the shadow of a large oak and kiss me senseless. The moment he moaned my name replayed in my mind and I shivered with pleasure. That Tanya noticed.
"I knew it!" She said, mistaking pleasure for horror.
"No! That's not what I meant at all!" I jumped to Carlisle's defense. "He's…wonderful and so kind and gentle with me even when I know he wants more than I can give him." I sighed, speechless to describe the warm feeling that made my chest tight with longing.
"Oh, Carlisle, you bad bad boy," Tanya scolded playfully at my absent fiancé. I realized I had been tricked and put my head in my hands, mortified.
"Tanya!" Kate groaned from the front seat.
"What? It's just healthy curiosity. So who kissed who?"
"You sound like you're 15," Kate shot back. Tanya just stuck her tongue out at her sister. I wondered if these three really were 800 years old.
"So?" Tanya asked me.
"He…" I tried to say but the words trailed off.
"Really! I didn't think he'd have the audacity. Did he ask permission first like a proper gentlemen?"
"He…well, no… he just didn't know what to say." I tried to explain.
"Carlisle speechless? I find that hard to believe."
From the front I heard Irina snort in amusement.
"What was that Irina?" Kata asked.
"Nothing."
"Oh come on," Tanya pleaded. "It's just us girls here."
"I've seen Carlisle speechless. It's a little pathetic actually. He just stands there with his mouth open."
"A little yes," I admitted, fondly remembering how his shocked speechless expression when I had first told him my heart was his. I loved how my immortal memory recorded all the minute changes as his sadness faded away and joy took its place.
"I bet you could shock him speechless on command," Tanya said with a scheming smirk. I took note to look out for whatever it was she was planning. "Now, more importantly, how did he ask?"
"Ask?"
"Ask you to marry him?"
"Oh."
"Was it romantic?" Tanya asked. "He seems like the kind of person that would go way over the top if he was going to do it."
"Well… not really," I said and then I thought about it. Carlisle had gone to Columbus, lied, stolen, coerced, faced Charles, restrained his overwhelming anger, and succeeded just to get me out of my previous marriage. That was a fairly over the top way of saying 'leave your husband and marry me instead.' "I mean he did do something rather… bold." I said realizing that Tanya was still watching me.
"Well… What?" She asked, eyes bright. I realized that I was probably the biggest source of gossip she'd had in a very long time, longer than I had been alive. I supposed I could give her some details.
"He… helped me get a divorce." That shocked the car into silence. Kate even slowed down from the most likely illegal speed she was going. Tanya just stared at me.
"Who were you married to?" Kate asked, worry concealed in her voice.
"A man, a human, in Columbus before Carlisle changed me. We were never happy so about two years ago I left him. I went to Ashland and that's where Carlisle found and changed me."
"He changed you?" Irina asked in shock, turning to look at me.
"Well… yes." I sighed, not knowing what else to say.
"Carlisle spent years alone refusing to change anyone. He only changed Edward because the boy was dying." Tanya said seriously. "We tried to convince him to find some companionship for years."
"Was he very different?" I asked them. "Before Edward and I, what was he like?"
"He was… colder," Tanya said and I scrunched up my nose trying to equate the word cold with Carlisle.
"We didn't see him much but it seemed he was happiest when he was going to work," Kate supplied.
"But he did visit," Irina put it, "even though it took him away from his work. He missed real company, I mean our kind, who know what he is."
"He did live in Alaska with us for a short time but he missed the human contact. We're very secluded up north," Tanya said. "Always having been together it's hard for us to imagine what his kind of life would even be like, to be isolated, lying to everyone."
"I think I can," I said remembering my days in Ashland and the effort I put into my work at the local school because it was the only place I felt connected to people even if those people knew nothing about me, who I really was.
"Are you happy with him?" Kate asked. I smiled at her in the rear view mirror.
"Yes, I am."
"Good," she said. "He seems happy too."
Irina gave me a quizzical look then turned away again, back toward the road.
"So," Tanya asked with forced restraint, "did he ask before or after the divorce went through."
"Actually. I asked him." Again the car was shocked into silence and Irina and Kate both spun in their seats to look at me. A blaring car horn had Kate swerving back into her own lane and muttering in what sounded like Russian.
"You asked him?" Tanya repeated my words.
"And he said yes?" Irina asked.
"Well… he had the rings so I ended up saying yes to him," I supplied. I knew then I would have to recount most of the story, the parts that mattered at least. I sighed and realized why they had chosen somewhere as far away as Albany for this shopping trip. It was going to be a long drive.
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Tanya
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"I really think this is too much," Esme said, holding up the pale gold silk and chiffon dress decorated with sky blue and deep ultramarine beading.
"Then think of it as a wedding present," I whispered behind her. I caught Irina's frown and Kate rolling her eyes from where they were unpacking their purchases on the bed. I turned back to my small pile of wrapped boxes. It had been a nice day in town shopping with Esme. She really was a sweet girl if a bit young for Carlisle. She had born my admittedly prying questions with good humor. I knew there were details she wasn't giving me, private ones, but as infuriating as that was, it was comforting to know that she would protect Carlisle's privacy. It had been a treat to introduce our soon-to-be-cousin to the world of department store fashion. Kate had been shocked to hear that little country Esme had never even been in a department store though she only balked at the highest priced items. The gold and blue dress was one such item but it was going to be worth every penny. I smirked at my little plan coming into fruition. The door to the little back room of the house opened and Carmen breezed in.
"The men are on their way back," she said, flicking her long dark locks over her shoulder. "Are you going to give them a little fashion show?"
"You know how I love offending Eleazar's delicate sensitivities," Kate said with a smirk.
"For you," Irina said, passing a thin box to Carmen.
"You bought me something?"
"We do know your measurements," I said with a wink.
"Something to offend certain 'sensitivities'?" She asked slyly with a laugh.
"I can only think of what we were wearing at the last turn of the century," Irina replied with a shake of her head, examining a pair of shoes she'd bought. "Some of those dresses would put modern 'impropriety' to shame."
"Anything to get out of corsets!" Carmen said with a moan. "I would cut my hair if it really meant I'd never have to wear one of those things again." She opened the box carefully and then laughed at what she pulled out. It flowed over her fingers and rolled like liquid from the box on the desk, simmering in the morning light from the window, bright red as fresh blood. The wide straight neckline and low hem were heavily beaded and the drop waist cinched the fabric just enough to give the dress shape.
"What a lovely color," Carmen said ruefully. Kate smiled and shrugged. Esme just gaped at the extravagant and slightly inappropriate dress. I caught her look and shared a glace with Irina. We both had to cover our mouths from laughing.
"I think I have a pair of shoes that will match it at home," I told her with a chuckle.
"Oh thank you," Carmen said with a roll of her eyes and moved to put the dress away.
"You're not going to show Eleazar?" I asked her, feigning shock and hurt. "We've all got something to show off. We wouldn't want you to feel left out."
"Well I can't show off the wedding dress yet so Carmen and I can sit this out," Esme said, putting the lid back over the gold dress. Nice try, I thought to her and caught her hands.
"What do you mean? You can wear this dress."
"But… it's not at all appropriate for…"
"Nonsense!" I cut her off. "We're just doing a little show. You'll find a reason to wear it again eventually I'm sure but why not show it off now?" I already had the box open again.
"But…"
"But what? I'm sure Carlisle will enjoy seeing it."
"I don't know…"
"Come on," I said. "I'll wear the silver dress I got. If anyone's going to have cause for censure I'm sure it will be me." I wonder what Edward will think of it? I thought pulling out the short little silver dress I'd bought.
"Do you need help changing?" I asked Esme when I saw her just standing, staring at the dress in its box.
"No," she said very quickly and picked up the dress. I tried unsuccessfully to hide my triumphant smirk. Kate, who had already shimmied into her fur lined cream dinner gown, threw me a look. I ignored her as I had all of yesterday.
By the time we heard the front door open and three sets of footsteps over the threshold each of us was dressed and focused on pinning up Carmen's hair. Kate enjoyed this because she was always envious of Carmen,'s Irinia's, and my curls. Esme was just happy not to be the center of attention.
"The more you pin the more I want to get the scissors and just sheer it all off!" Carmen cried.
"Oh! You'd make your mate so sad!" I teased her.
"He'll get over it," She grumbled with a growl. Kate growled back playfully.
"What is going on in there?" Carlisle asked in the front room.
"I've learned to leave women to their own affairs," Eleazar replied.
"We'll be out momentarily," I said, loud enough for them to hear through the small house. "Sit down and make yourselves comfortable." This is going to be interesting, I thought, shooing Carmen and Irina ahead of me out of the room. Esme paused at her own reflection in the long mirror and cringed.
"What would my father say," I heard her breath the words so softly only Kate and I who were still in the room heard her.
"I'm sure he would think you look lovely," I told her.
"I don't think he'd even recognize me, I don't recognize me!" She muttered. Kate put a hand on the smaller woman's shoulder.
"Someone used to tell me, 'it's not the dress that makes the woman—it's how she wears it.'" She said with a serious expression but mirth in her eyes.
"Alright," Esme murmured and let me lead her out by the wrist in time to see Irina rounding the dining table into the living room, her dress swaying seductively with every graceful movement of her hips and the flared bottom swirling around her knees.
"A successful trip then," I heard Eleazar comment, disinterestedly.
"See for yourself," Irina taunted and dragged Carmen out with her. I could just picture Carmen's glare. It really was fun to have a couple around to tease, or at least a man around to tease. I'd be sad to see them go but there was still possibility they'd stick around permanently.
"That's… a nice color," I heard Carlisle say in his diplomatic fashion. Eleazar's face was what I expected when I walked around the corner: wide eyed and mouth slightly agape. He shifted uncomfortably and I could swear that he cleared his throat.
"Th-that's quite a dress, who picked that out?" he asked, voice a bit higher than usual. Carmen glared at Irina.
"We saw it and thought of Carmen. It was a such a deal it seemed too good to pass up," Irina said with a smirk. I saw Edward roll his eyes, he at least knew she was lying.
"I think it looks good with your hair," Kate said as we walked in. I watched Edward's face as he took in our little group, eyes lingering only a second on Kate and I before finding Esme, standing half behind my shoulder. We did dress her to grab attention, I reasoned to myself but I was still disappointed. I mentally shrugged off his lack of attention to focus on Carlisle's reaction.
"I think Esme has the best find," I said and urged her out in front of me. "They had new dresses come up from New York based on the latest fashions in Paris." Esme's dress was just covering her knees and hung from thin shoulder straps with a plunging neckline. The low waist was barely more than a seam and a row of beads on the front. I took one of her hands and lifting it up, spun her around fast enough to surprise her, even turn her into a blur to human eyes but, we could see every twist of the light fabric as the beaded bottom lifted up with her sin. Best of all was the back of the dress which was open in a long V to the waistline where deeper gold fabric was pleated into the back from then on in an narrow angular hourglass shape.
Carlisle's face shifted from wide eyed surprise to absolute shock to that speechless expression I'd never had the pleasure of seeing. His mouth didn't gape the way Eleazar's did but was just slightly parted, not slack but undecided. He stopped blinking and breathing though his eyes darted from Esme to the dress to me to my sisters to Edward then back to Esme where they remained transfixed by her.
"What do you think, Carlisle?" I asked him specifically. For a moment I didn't think he'd heard me. Then he swallowed and licked his lips quickly. He opened his mouth, clearly forming a word then stopped and started to form another. I quickly shut my own mouth to keep from laughing. He did this three times and every time the urge became harder to resist.
"Who picked out this dress?" Edward asked, saving his father.
Why ruin my fun? I asked him with my thoughts and he rolled his eyes at me with a beautiful crooked smile.
"I think Kate saw it first," I said.
"I didn't say anything about it," Kate piped up.
"If I remember correctly," Irina said with a fake expression of thoughtfulness, "wasn't it you, Tanya, who told Esme to try it on?"
"That's right," Kate said with a conspiratorial smile, "she did and I think Tanya bought the dress too!"
Traitors, I glared at them sidelong and they sniggered.
"I really think it is too much," Esme replied.
"Nonsense! And you can't be thinking of driving all that way just to return it," I said quickly.
"I-It is a nice dress," Carlisle finally found his voice and everyone turned to stare at him. I could hardly hold back my laughter now at the way he squirmed under the sudden scrutiny. Esme recovered first from our collective shock.
"Well then I guess if it's a wedding present I'll keep it," she whispered. "L-like you said, I'll find somewhere to wear it."
"I'm sure you will," I told her, tearing my eyes from Carlisle and just catching Edward's slightly mortified expression before he turned away. It looks like Esme is going to be in for a few pleasant surprises with this one, I thought as we went back into the little back room to change. I threw one last look over my shoulder to see Carlisle glance up from his book at Esme's retreating back and the long stretch of exposed skin. His eyes were dark and his expression longing.
I suppose I see what all the rush is about. As soon as the thought crossed my mind I looked over at Edward, who was standing by one of the bookshelves and he met my gaze. I smirked to know I was right but also to know he was listening to my thoughts. Maybe he did pay more attention to me than I thought.
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Edward
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It was enjoyable to have company around even if it made the small house very loud for me. I had grown accustomed to the voices of my parents and I was getting better at tuning out the duller human voices of the city around us. The sudden influx of clearer Vampire minds were a whole new set of problems for me. Most noticeably was Tanya and her growing interests in me. I hadn't been trying to pay attention to them but it was hard not to turn my head every time she thought my name. Then there was Irina's less decided mind. She wavered over the week that the Alaskan coven was with us about what to think of Esme. On the one hand she was predisposed to dislike the small dark haired woman who she thought was very common and rather boring. On the other hand Esme was unfailingly kind to everyone and try as Irina did not to notice she was confronted over and over by the face that Esme was the most human vampire she'd ever met. It was hard not to like my mother.
Eleazar and Carmen who outwardly were perfect guests were actually the hardest adjustment. They were happy to go farther afield with us to hunt to avoid attention and remain inconspicuous while in town. Eleazar was a better partner for Carlisle's philosophical debates than I was and Carmen was interested in my music and in teaching me some of her own repertoire. The trying part about their visit was their thoughts concerning each other. Despite whatever Tanya or her sisters thought, Eleazar was not as prudish in private as he was in the company of others and certainly not prudish in his thoughts.
Eleazar was sitting with me in the shade of a trellis Esme had erected at the back of the house reading, or pretending to, while the five women were sitting, just out of earshot, on a spread blanket at the edge of the woods having a 'picnic'. We were all enjoying the break in the rain that had been falling almost constantly for three days even if that meant risking the occasional sunny breaks in the cloud cover. Eleazar was enjoying seeing Carmen in a sundress after so much time bundled in unnecessary jackets in wintery Alaska.
"You know I can hear you," I growled finally and he jumped a little.
Oh! I completely forgot. I'm sorry, he thought, embarrassed.
"I hear much worse from my classmates every day," I said, trying to put him at ease, "I swear I don't try to hear what you're thinking. Actually I wish I could turn it off sometimes."
It is a little strange that you can't. Even Aro can restrain his ability when he doesn't want to know everything some thinks, though he rarely does. Eleazar thought.
"It gets tiresome," I said nodding. "I've tried, a lot."
Quickly he ran through a few different techniques he knew worked with other gifts amoung the Volturi guard and other European coven's he'd encountered.
"Thank you," I said quickly filing away the new information for a later date.
I hope of those helps, he replied. Of everyone, he had adjusted to my silent method of communication best. I truly do or your parents will be difficult people to live with.
"They already are," I groaned. "I thought it would be better when they stopped dancing around each other like blind children."
What do you mean?
"They spent months completely oblivious that they loved each other and me in the middle sworn to secrecy."
Truly? How strange. The day I met Carmen I was almost certain I wouldn't be able to face life if I couldn't see her again. The first moment we talked I felt she saw me the same. I wonder if Carlisle and Esme are really as close as I am to Carmen? Oh! I'm sorry, Edward. I don't mean to question your parents' commitment to each other. I realize that could be considered rude.
"No, I can't blame you for your thoughts. You're wrong though." I said looking out to where my mother was playing a checkers with Carmen. "It wasn't that my parents haven't always loved each other that way, the way you and Carmen do, but that they both thought they weren't good enough for the other. Carmen is a lot more sure of herself than Esme and despite the way Carlisle acts, he has his own self-doubt as well."
He hides them well.
"I think it comes with being a doctor. They often pretend like they understand the illnesses they're treated more than they really do."
Why?
"A less worried patient will get better faster. It's a kind of placebo treatment. People who think they should get better tend to do better than those who expect to stay sick or die."
Humans, he thought with distain. I chuckled.
"It does sound ridiculous but Carlisle's seen it work."
Hmm, Eleazar considered this information but his thoughts strayed back to Carmen as they inevitably always did. He considered how quickly they had found each other. He was almost a hundred years younger than Carlisle and Carmen had been changed less than half a century after him. They had met in the early 1800s. Carlisle had lived for much longer alone. The sisters had been wandering for nearly 800 years already and still searched for mates. He wondered vaguely if I would take of them as my mate. He had noticed Tanya's interest.
"No," I snorted and shook my head. "That not very likely."
You're still young, Eleazar shrugged, and they are beautiful women. You could take some time to get to know them better.
"I don't usually need very long to get to know someone."
Oh yes. That would make an intimate relationship more… interesting. He was surprisingly not thinking of the advantages in private but of the lack of privacy. It would be hard to give up literally all privacy to one person, even your mate. Aro learned to turn off his ability specifically to afford his mate some privacy.
"It's really worse than that. When I first woke up in this life I knew what I had become because I could hear Carlisle thinking it. I knew what he thought of Vampires and it wasn't very optimistic at the time. I knew all his doubts and worries. Inadvertently he told me his worst secrets simply by trying not to think about them. Have you ever tried to not think about something?"
I suppose it's like trying not to think about your thirst, Eleazar mused. He was remembering his first days adjusting to the new diet. By consciously choosing something not to think about you have to acknowledge what that thing is.
"Exactly. So anyone close to me can't even decide what to keep from me. By doing that, they've already told me what it is."
That's a difficult conundrum. It's sad to think that such a wonderful gift might doom you to a life of solitude.
"Maybe it does," I muttered and leaned back to look across the yard at the women who were dealing out cards now and laughing at their own jokes. "On the other hand I feel closer to people, other people, people that barely know me. One of the things Esme hated the most about first integrating back into the human world was that she couldn't talk to people without having to breath more. She felt cut off because she was always holding her breath. I never needed that. I met people through their minds."
So you're saying you're content with your life?
"I don't know if I'd go that far. It's certainly better now that I'm not tempted to smack my parents heads together every few hours."
Soon you'll be wanting to shove their heads apart, Eleazar thought, adding the glimpse he'd caught of Esme stealing a kiss from her fiancée on their last hunting trip.
"Yeah," I sighed heavily. "But I can deal with amorous thoughts. It's the… violent ones that bother me."
Of theirs? Eleazar thought, trying to picture what would bring Carlisle and Esme to violence. He was close in thinking that they would both fight to protect the other but not what I had meant.
"Human violent thought," I explained. "You'd be surprised how many violent and… despicable people I know of. They don't look any different from anyone else and no one else even knows the danger. But I do!" I shuddered.
Have you ever acted to prevent one of them from committing violence? Eleazar asked.
"Punish them for their thoughts?"
Maybe not for their thoughts but their intentions? He suggested.
I was puzzled by his words and the memories that accompanied them. Eleazar and Carlisle had both lived with the Volturi for a time but they had seen different sides of the coven. Eleazar had been one of them and knew how they dispensed justice first hand. Many times acting on the intentions of a coven had saved all Vampires from exposure. Even if he had left Voltera to live as Carlisle and the sisters did he still believed in the justice that was being done there. Like Aro I couldn't be fooled or lied to. I would know what crimes had been done and who was truly repentant. If I knew of the terrible things that were being done or would be done what part of the blame did I carry for not acting on my knowledge?
Those thoughts distracted me for a long time and even when Carmen and Kate invited us into their game I was distracted. Maybe my gift would always keep me from having a relationship with someone the way my parents did but I could do something else with my life, something meaningful. I wondered what Carlisle would think of my idea. Would he be disappointed in me? I considered asking him when he returned home from the library. I changed my mind thought when I heard through his and Esme's minds the happy reunion they shared on the porch. There was no reason to ask him now. He was happy with her and excited for the future. I could wait until after the wedding.
.
Kate
.
I found Esme painting in the front room, the one Edward 'slept' in. She had set up a small table easel on the desk and had pallets of watercolors out around her. Her pallet was awash in warm earthy autumn tones and a bright blue, which she had painted the sky. She turned quickly when I cracked the door open.
"Kate," She said with a smile and reached for a cloth to cover the work but she was a moment too slow.
"It's beautiful." I said softly. It was a wonder she had such fine control being as strong as vampires are. "You were painting the park trails by the river weren't you." I had recognized the scene from one of our walks in Rochester.
"Y-yes," Esme said. "Irina said she liked it and I thought… it would be a nice present to send back with you."
I ventured into the room and carefully lifted the drop cloth. I could see the warm colored canopy of trees dripping leaves into the river and the sky reflected around them. A few nondescript vague shapes inhabited the park but the real focus was the light in the treetops and their vivid color.
"You painted it on a sunny day," I noted.
"Yes, I got caught there once coming home from the school when the clouds broke up. I sat under the shade for a few hours until the sun set a bit more. It was enjoyable even if it was dangerous."
"It's beautiful. Irina will love it. But aren't we supposed to be giving you gifts?" I looked at her sidelong, "it is your wedding after all."
"I'm getting everything I've ever dreamed of already." She said almost without thinking. "I know that sounds stupid but it's the truth. Why were you looking for me?"
"Not stupid, just a little love struck," I said, straightening up and brushing out the long cream dress I was wearing. "I was wondering if this was too much for the wedding. I have another dress I can wear that's not quite so flashy. I know you didn't want anything fancy for the wedding and I wouldn't want to outshine the bride." Not that I thought anyone could outshine Esme in Carlisle's eyes. The way he watched her some times made me wonder if he even saw other women anymore if they had all receded to the level of men in his attractions.
"Not at all," Esme said, shaking her head, "you look lovely. It's a very modern style. I don't think I could pull off something like that but… it suits you."
"Thanks. I usually just wear men's clothes up in Alaska. They're easier to move in."
"Yes," Esme laughed, "I have often thought hunting in a dress is… impractical."
"Shorter dresses are easier. I asked the woman to hem this one shorter but I think she's somewhat of a prude and ignored me."
"Would you like it shorter?" Esme asked, looking it over. "I think you're right. The dress was cut for someone with longer legs."
"I would but the wedding is only a few days away; that isn't enough time to get it hemmed," I said with a sigh, looking down at the cream fabric twining around my knees.
"Here, I can do it."
"What?" I asked. But Esme had already stood up and took my hands in her own. She lead me through the house to the little kitchen in the back. They apparently just used it for storage because there were boxes and bags and a little table covered in a sheet. Esme threw this back to reveal a few piles of fabric and spools of threat. Deftly she chose thread, needle and pins from the boxes and pegs.
"You sew too?" I asked.
"I learned when I was very young," She replied, positioning me in the middle of the small kitchen, which I now recognized as a converted sewing room. She knelt at the hem of my dress and began to work.
"I wish I had learned," I sighed. "There are lots of things I probably could have fixed myself over the years."
"I could teach you," Esme offered.
"I don't have the patience," I replied, feeling bad for refusing. "Tanya's tried to teach me but I'm not much use for delicate things." Delicate was never a word that would be used to describe me. Esme was just the opposite, soft spoken, soft features, and gentle, patient hands. She moved around me on her knees fiddling with the stitches faster than any human would have been able to work.
"It took me a long time to get used to doing things like this with my new strength," Esme said, making conversation. I was grateful. I'm not much good at making conversation—fights maybe.
"I was ecstatic. That was probably my favorite part of the change until I discovered my gift."
"Your gift?" Esme asked. "Like Edward?"
"Not really. Edward's power is passive."
"Would you show me yours?" Esme asked, shifting around again on her knees.
"You wouldn't like that," I said scrunching up my face. She gave me a curious face. "Fine," I relented, "but don't tell Carlisle."
"Alright?" She said, eyebrows drawn together. I held out my palm to her.
"Touch it, just one finger," I said. She put down her tools and reached out. I tried to keep the shock low as I could. She still yelped and snatched her hand back. "Yeah, that's why I said you wouldn't like it."
"Does that happen any time someone touches you?" She asked. I could see her thinking back to see if I had touched anyone.
"Nope," I said quickly. "Touch it again, it won't hurt." Cautiously she reached out again and this time just tapped my palm. When nothing happened she touched it more firmly.
"So, no one can touch you if you don't want them to?" She asked me. I thought it was an odd way to phrase the question.
"Something like that," I said with a shrug. She smiled a little sad smile that tugged at my cold heart. What was making her sad? I wondered.
"That must be nice," she looked down and shook her head before going back to her work. I considered her words. That must be nice? I thought, like she doesn't know what that feels like?
"Is Carlisle forcing you into this?" I asked, my voice coming out more demanding than I intended and Esme jumped, dropping the hem of the dress quickly.
"What?" She squeaked.
"This marriage, is he forcing you?"
"NO!" She stood up in a flash, her voice just a growl and eyes blazing with fury at the insult.
"My mistake." I put my hands up in surrender and stepped back. As quickly as the anger had flared up in Esme it cooled to confusion
"Why would you think that?" She asked me.
"What you said 'That must be nice'. I thought someone must be forcing you to do something."
"N-no," she said looking down. She bent to pick up her tool and then to my shock went back to hemming my dress. For a long moment the only sounds were the swish of fabric and our breathing.
"It was my husband," she said suddenly.
"Not Carlisle?"
"No, Charles, the man I married as a human."
"Oh." I said realizing. She'd been wondering what her life would have been like if she had my gift then. I remembered Irina when she was younger and what the newborn strength had meant to her. Esme had explained her history vaguely to us on the Albany trip and only alluded to why she left. I'd assumed her husband was unfaithful which would be reason enough to leave him.
"Unhappy is a bit of an understatement then," I noted. She laughed a little nervously.
"Yes it is. I just don't like to think about him much now that I have Carlisle and Edward. That was my old life and I'm ready to put it behind me. I'm sorry I growled at you; that was a terrible thing to do."
"It's alright. I was wrong," I told her simply. "It didn't seem like something Carlisle would do but he does seem crazy about you."
"Really?" She asked, pausing to look up at me.
"You don't notice?" I chuckled.
"I guess not," she frowned. "In some ways I'm still getting used to the idea that he loves me, much less wants to marry me. This is all happening very fast."
"I've heard that bridge get… what do they call it?"
"Cold feet," she told me with a rueful smile. "My mother told me that was all I had the night before I married Charles."
"And now?" I asked her.
"No colder than usual."
"Vampire humor, good. Carlisle never got to that point. I think deep down he still wants to be human." I shook my head. "I guess this wedding is very different from your last one?" She laughed.
"You can hardly imagine."
"I haven't been to a wedding in a couple hundred years," I admitted, "so no I can't. Would you tell me about it? I mean if it doesn't bother you. You don't have to." Great, now I sound like an idiot. I thought to myself with a repressed groan. Esme just shook her head.
"It doesn't bother me. I've been thinking about it more than I'd like recently. Well the day I married Charles was a sunny summers day. I can't even go near a window on a day like that now. I was so nervous I couldn't eat anything before the wedding. It was held in our little local church and every family for ten miles was invited. Charles and his family came down from Columbus wearing fancy clothes. The building was packed. My mother cried a lot, mostly with joy. My three best friends were my brides maids, but I can't remember any of them smiling at me the whole day. Charles brought his friends from town and they were already drunk. I noticed but my mother refused to admit it. My father walked me down the aisle. He gave me a kiss on the cheek before he gave me away and whispered 'Take care, Ezzie' in my ear. It had been years since he called me that. Then Charles and I said our vows. Everyone went outside to the reception in the town center and they were all drunk before five in the afternoon.
"There! All done," She said, cutting off the end of the string with her teeth and jumping to her feet. I could see the picture that she was describing all too clearly. The packed little wooden building was a sea of expectant faces in my imagination and Esme standing next to a leering faced man with beady black eyes hesitantly saying her vows. I saw what she meant. This wedding would be very different.
"Thanks," I said, not sure what I was thanking her for.
"You're welcome. I'm happy to help in any way I can. It was very nice of all of you to come so far just for Carlisle and I." She said while she put away the thread and needle.
"We always enjoy coming to see family. Carlisle is family so you will be too."
"Thank you." She smiled shyly at me and I tried to return it as warmly as I could. "It's been nice to have female company."
"We've been enjoying the male company," I replied with a laugh. "Not enjoying but just having men around makes life fun. Even Eleazar can have his moments." She looked a bit skeptical at the last part. "My sisters and I are a bit starved for male companions. 'Keep the hope alive' is what we say."
"'The hope'?" She asked.
"The hope we'll find mates," I replied.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I know Irinia had…"
"She had hoped but she didn't love Carlisle, not like you do." I said with a shrug. Of the three of us Irina had always been the most bothered by the solitude. She was quickest to hope and the most disappointed at every rejection. Somehow the kindness with which Carlisle denied her had stung her even worse than usual.
"I don't want that to come between us, especially not if we're to be family," Esme said, worrying her lip with her teeth.
"Irina will get over it." I knew already that Esme's kindness was working away at my sister's wound. Soon it would be just a memory as it should be. There was someone out there for each of us; we had to believe that.
"I hope so. You three and Carmen are the closest people I have had to… female friends in a very long time."
"What about your brides maids?"
"I lost touch with them when they married and moved to different counties. Charles didn't like me going out much in Columbus so I was usually on my own there."
I made an annoyed tisk noise and shook my head.
"I know it seems stupid, that I lived with someone who… who hurts me."
"No, it's not that," I said quickly. "I mean… I don't personally understand it. I was taught how to protect myself from a young age. It was my job later in life to protect others. I just don't understand how no one stood up for you."
"Someone did," she said, meeting my eyes for a moment. "Carlisle did." I felt a real genuine smile spreading across my face.
"Everything you've ever wanted, huh?" I asked.
"He really is."