Chapter 8
Threats
The next chemistry class was anything but enjoyable. There was strain throughout the room, mainly between Korra and Sentai, though quite a few students were also contributing. Word had gotten out about the exam fiasco and the threat of firing the professor should he cross the Dean or the college's academic policy again. Despite being a grumpy old man, many of the students and other instructors liked Sentai for reasons unknown to her. Korra didn't think much of this; to be honest, she just wanted it all to go away so she could finish the semester and be done with chemistry forever.
About a week after the regrading, Korra found several notes in her mailbox. She didn't recognize the handwriting, and by the way they were penned and the content, she guessed she wasn't supposed to. Some of them were very short messages, such as: 'Fuck with Sentai and you fucking die.' The words were sloppy, so she figured they were just drunken college students fucking off on a Friday night. She dismissed it until she got back to her dorm room. She opened the door to find several more letters of varying length. Each was more gruesome than the last. She was shaking by the time she finished the final paper, a three-page long description of how the author was going to beat Korra and force her into submission, all in excruciating detail.
She checked several times within a five minute period to ensure the entrance of her room was locked. She threw the sheets in her top desk drawer and crawled onto her bed.
I never asked for this. I never wanted any of this to happen. I just wanted to go to college, get an education, and be of use.
Her eyes moved back to her desk drawer.
What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck am I going to do?
The letters had made it very clear that, if Korra told anyone about these threats, they would come after her. She had noticed throughout the week that people were glaring at her and calling her names under their breath, well before the letters came. It seemed to hit all levels, from freshmen to seniors. Apparently, Sentai had quite the fanclub.
But why? Why would anyone like him?
Korra tried to shake it off, but sleep never came. She couldn't even bring herself to turn the light off.
Come on, Korra. You're not weak. You're strong. You're Tonraq's daughter and Senna's daughter, and they raised you to be tough. They taught you how to fight, you can beat any of these jerks.
A crash broke her thoughts and sent her flying off of the bed. She was in a defensive stance as she scanned the room. She found the rock that had soared through her window and ran to see the culprit, but they had fled. There was a note bound to the stone. She untied and opened it:
'I know where you live. I know where to find you. I know your class schedule. I know the people you hold dear to you, I fucking know everything. I will watch you day and night, and when you're alone, I'm going to beat you. I'm going to bludgeon you with my fucking fists until your savage mouth begs for me to stop. First your face, then everything else. I'm going to kick you and stomp on you while you're curled up on the ground, until you're crying and coughing up blood all over the sidewalk. And guess what? I'm not going to stop. I'm never going to stop. I am going to hurt you day in and day out until you leave this place and never, ever bring your snow savage ass back here. And there are more like me. You'll never get away. Quit while you're ahead or you'll end up dead.'
Korra was shaking. Her knees gave out and she collapsed onto the floor. She was no warrior like her parents.
Maybe I should tell them. But what good would that do? Even if I wrote a letter write now and sent it out, they probably wouldn't get it in time. But if I stay here, if I stay in my room, they can't get me, right? But they know where I live. Fuck, what am I going to do? She threw the letter in her drawer with the rest of them and slammed it shut.
She sat, speculating for hours on her bed.
Even if I did tell the authorities, would they believe me? Would they even be able to find out who it was? Or would they kill me before anyone got the chance to figure it out?
In that time, three more rocks had come through her window, each with more detailed accounts of what was going to be done to her. Korra was afraid – more so than when Sentai was in the Dean's office with her a few days prior.
Why? Why is this fucking happening? What the hell did I even do? I didn't march up to the Dean's office asking to get my test graded over. I wasn't the one who graded with bias.
After the fifth rock came smashing in, she crawled underneath her absent roommate's bed, hiding behind the boxes leftover from her traveling. She abandoned any hope she had of getting sleep and cried, self-loathing in her cowardice.
This is pathetic. You're being pathetic. You're strong. You can fight. You might not be a Bender, but neither are they, I think... But come on. You can take them. You're not weak. You're more than this.
Her body wouldn't move, despite the pep-talk she had tried to give herself.
Move, dammit. Get up from under Opal's bed. Be the warrior they trained you to be.
I'm not a warrior.
She shook her head and let the tears fall. Korra curled in on herself. Too many things were mixing: rapid emotions, rampaging thoughts, but nothing was worse than the physical fear that gripped her, that forced her into instinctual hiding. She hated it, wanted nothing more than to step out from behind those boxes and stand tall against the threats she faced.
But why won't you fucking move?
This was one of the few times that she felt fire within her but couldn't find a way to draw from it, even though she wanted to, which, in itself, was a seldom occurrence. So she sat and wept in her confliction, fighting and failing to bring herself together into a stable state.
(-)
Korra watched her room turn from a half-lit twilight into a gray, dull sunrise that clashed against the yellow light of her desk lamp. Storm clouds were overhead, and not just outside. Her head was pounding with exhaustion and emotion.
At least the rocks stopped, she thought as she pulled herself out from the slew of boxes around her. She glanced at the window, thinking of the annoyance it would be to get it fixed. How would she even explain it? Yeah, so I pissed off a professor and his cult of followers and they threw a bunch of rocks through my window. She palmed her forehead and groaned. I'm too tired for joking right now.
Just as she began walking towards her bathroom, she heard the ruffling of paper. She found another note slid under her doorway.
Now I've got you.
Korra rushed to the exit and grabbed the handle, only to freeze in her tracks.
I have no idea who it could be.
She peered through the limited peephole and found nothing.
They could be hiding around the corner, waiting for me. This could be a trap.
Or your imagination.
She pressed her back against the door and slid down, her face in her hands.
Fuck.
Her foot picked up on the paper underneath her. Might as well, she sighed, unfolding the note. What do you know? Another death threat. She tossed it aside, trying to be nonchalant. The act may have seemed to work in her head, but it didn't prevent the encroaching fear that took over her limbs. Soon enough, she was shaking again.
Come on, Korra. Pick yourself up.
Nothing.
Move!
Nothing.
She let out a sound of frustration and banged her head against the door a single time.
What is wrong with me?
With a sigh, she unclenched her teeth and struggled to open her dry eyes. Maybe a shower will help me relax.
Korra glanced at her legs. The thought of hot water running over them stopped their quivering.
Good. Now move, dammit.
She pulled herself to her feet and swayed. With a hand to her temple, she stumbled to the bathroom. Without hesitation, she locked the door behind her. Soon, her ears were filled with the wonderful white noise of the rushing water and her nose inhaled the billowing steam. The dorm had a somewhat-standup shower, but the tub was just big enough and had the right depth for Korra to sit down if she tucked in her legs or bent her knees. The Southerner may not be a Water Bender, but Spirits, did she enjoy the relief the liquid brought to her. Water was her safe place. She curled into the bottom of the bath and felt her body warm up as the streams pelted her bare chest. She rested her head against the wall and closed her eyes, trying to push her thoughts into nothing but a blank slate.
Clear your mind. Concentrate.
Korra was almost successful at calming down until her stomach growled. The noise seemed to echo against the shower. She clutched her abdomen as the hunger pains swelled. With it returned all of the emotions that she was so desperate to bury. The tranquility of the water couldn't vanquish her fear of stepping outside the safety of her heavy dorm room door. Another grumble forced its way through Korra's body and up to her throbbing head.
Maybe I have some meat left from mom, she pondered as she pulled herself to her feet. She wrapped her towel around her (I remembered it this time!) and staggered to her bed. The small blue box held nothing but air and the letter her father had written her. Had I gone through all of the food already? She sighed and hopped onto her mattress. Her eyes wandered her roommate's side of the double, hoping there might be some sort of stash somewhere. She found nothing.
Of course she wouldn't have food here. She's never even here! Korra threw herself back onto the springs, an arm outstretched on each side. She tried shutting her heavy eyes, only to have them jolt open again. Anxiety consumed her.
This is ridiculous. I shouldn't be like this. I shouldn't be so weak and afraid. I don't want to be.
Twenty minutes later, she decided it would be a good idea to put clothes on. She slid off of the bed, noticing several more notes at the foot of the baseboard where the door was, and creaked to the dresser. Knowing full well the Water Tribe girl had no strength to leave her dorm, she put on a pair of pajamas and slunk into her pelt. She stared at the wall and tried to ignore her thoughts and her stomach. Her limbs trembled whenever footsteps went down her hallway, despite her efforts to prevent it.
But I am.
Korra sighed and pulled the fur closer to her face. The only thing she wanted to be right now was numb in a vain attempt to vanquish these emotions.