He did not know why, but as soon as Loki heard the musical laugher of the elves and the flickering of firelight through the trees, his stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch.

(I tried so hard to forget you; why will you not let me? Why will you not let me let go-)

(Hanging from Gungnir with an ever-loosening grip, needing something- anything- to reassure him that he was still wanted-)

(No, Loki.)

Gritting his teeth, Loki forced himself forward, cursing himself a thousand fold for being so stupidly soft- (Slipping a dagger between Thor's armor plates. Sentiment.)- and wanting to see Thor for himself. He put on his most charming smile as he came into a large clearing. A large fire was in the middle, and many long, wooden tables and benches were scattered around the place. There was dancing, singing, laughing- Loki felt out of place instantly. He had never been one for celebrations, even in his younger days.

And there, at the far end of the clearing, was a long table filled with the Lords and Ladies of Alfheim. With them sat Lady Sif, the Warriors Three and Thor.

Unlike Loki had expected, Thor was not laughing and drinking with his friends, but rather smiling very faintly and talking quietly with King Frey.

Loki was unaware of the elf maiden slide up to his side, so busy as he was staring at his brother- (Not my brother...).

"You are supposed to be dead," the elf said in a musical voice. A voice that Loki would recognise anywhere.

He jolted out of his thoughts and turned to the she-elf. And there she stood- pure white hair and skin just as pale, rosy lips, eyes a deep, glittering blue- looking just as he remembered her. Sigyn.

(He remembered declaring his love for her- She did the same for him. They were happy- it did not last. Did he love her still? No, he did not feel love. Did he trust her with his life? Yes. Always and forever.)

"Sigyn," he said, smiling.

"Not a bad disguise, but not your best. It is almost as though you want him to recognise you," she said, returning his smile.

Their marriage had collapsed- (His sons. His beautiful, perfect sons. One ripped apart, the other driven mad by the knowledge of what he had done to the point where he jumped off the Rainbow Bridge. And didn't that sound familiar?)- and they had drifted apart, but they bore no animosity towards each other. On Loki's visits to Alfheim, he would always visit Sigyn. They could almost be called friends were it not for the fact that Loki did not have friends.

"How have you been?" Loki asked, very pointedly ignoring her previous statement.

She knew this, of course, but Loki was grateful when she did not comment further. "Better than you, apparently. Why must you insist on getting yourself hurt wherever you go?"

"I don't purposefully get myself stabbed through the heart, you know," Loki sighed.

"No, but something happens to you nearly every time you go off on one of your adventures with Thor," she huffed, frowning.

"Well, it won't be happening again any time soon. Has Odin sent a search party for me?" He asked, frowning as he remembered revealing himself to the king in his chambers. He may have been in the Odinsleep, but Loki did not doubt that he was aware of his presence there.

"There... have been scouts sent around the Realms. Frey tells me that Thor believes you are alive and well, and that is the only reason he has left Midgard," she said solemnly.

Loki sighed through his nose, pursing his lips. Lowly, he said, "Does he have any idea?"

"Not that I know of. But he has been quiet as of late. These past few years have taken their toll on him- on both of you," she replied, looking at him with a concerned expression.

Loki did not reply, merely turning to stare at the table where the God of Thunder sat. Frey was no longer speaking with him, his attention now focused on his wife, and so Thor was left to drink his ale quietly, a pensive- (Thor? Pensive? Has Ragnarok come early?)- expression on his face.

He was quiet for a while, strangely grateful for Sigyn's presence by his side. Loki merely continued to stare at his once-brother.

And somewhere along the lines, without Loki even noticing, Thor stared right back.

Thor froze as he met the dark eyes of a strange elf at the edge of the clearing. He was standing beside Sigyn, his brother's- (Holding the cold body in his arms, praying that this was just another trick and that his baby brother would open his eyes and call him a fool for falling for his deception, then slip a blade between his ribs. The blade would be less painful.)- ex-wife, and was staring right at Thor. The First Prince of Asgard- (Only prince.)- had the strange feeling he knew the elf, and the way Sigyn was so familiar around him made Thor hope… No. His brother looked nothing like this elf.

But the familiar intensity of his gaze… Loki was the only person we able to unnerve Thor with a single, hard stare- though he had never admitted it- and this person was managing to do just that.

When Fandral, by far Loki's closest friend out of all the famed Warriors of Asgard, had knocked on Jane Foster's door, asking for Thor, the God of Thunder hardly knew what to think. Then when he had told him that he Allfather believed Loki to be alive and somewhere in the Nine Realms… Thor could still scarcely believe it.

And so he had searched. Alfheim was the last Realm to search, and he refused to cling to any hope that Loki was alive and well. But… that elf was still staring at him.

Finishing his ale, Thor stood from his seat, nodding at Sif with a smile as she noticed him go. He walked over to Sigyn and the elf, not even noticing the way the stranger blinked and tensed as he approached.

Loki cursed himself for his stupidity. And how could he have been so stupid? Now Thor was on his way over and Loki had nowhere to go without making the oaf suspect something.

"Well done, Loki, you just invited him over here," Sigyn said dryly.

Loki glared at her briefly before turning his back to the approaching prince. His ex-wife smiled as Thor neared, and Loki scolded himself inwardly for the burst of jealousy he still felt at seeing her smile so sweetly, so genuinely, at Thor.

"Thor! I've been meaning to speak with you," Sigyn said.

The she-elf and the Thunder God embraced, Thor's huge frame almost swallowing Sigyn's tiny one.

"Sigyn, it has been far too long," Thor said, smiling down at the elf. He then turned to Loki, who forced himself not to tense up under the familiar blue stare.

(Blue. Always, always blue.)

He smiled slightly and bowed, keeping up the charade of a stranger. Straightening again, he said, "Prince Thor Odinson, it is an honour."

Thor bowed his head and smiled. "And who might you be?"

"Anguem. An old friend of Lady Sigyn's," he said smoothly, the lie rolling off his tongue effortlessly- (But why does it hurt to lie to him?).

"A pleasure, Anguem," Thor smiled broadly, but Loki could tell that it was merely for the sake of politeness. Loki wondered why Thor's heart wasn't in the smile like it usually was.

"Have you found anything?" Sigyn said lowly, frowning.

Loki smirked inwardly. Sigyn was almost as convincing a liar as he was.

Thor sighed and shook his head. "No. I searched Svartalfheim for days and found no body. My brother is alive still. Why he has done this to father and I a second time, I do not know."

Loki felt a flare of anger at Thor's words. He wanted to drop his disguise, claw at Thor's face like a vicious creature, scream at him Why? You want to know why? and tell him everything. But he did not. He remained stoic and solemn.

"We cannot lose hope, Thor, that your brother will return to us," Sigyn said softly, and Loki felt his throat tighten.

(We cannot lose hope that your father will return to us- and your brother.)

(What hope is there for Thor?)

(There is always hope.)

Gone. A distant memory. An ever present thorn in Loki's side. Hope was something he refused to cling to, for it had never helped him before.

"I will never lose that hope, Sigyn. I can only blame myself for the things that have happened, and hope that one day he can find it in his heart to forgive me," Thor said, his voice heavy with regret.

Loki's eyes narrowed slightly, unnoticeable to those around hime, and he stared hard at Thor, searching for any lie in him. But he found none. How? How could Thor have fought Loki time and time again, have almost been killed by him several times, and still wish for Loki to forgive him?

(How can this oaf still think of me as his brother? How can he stand there, looking so honest and open, and be able to tell such a convincing lie? For this cannot be true. He cannot still think of me as... as family. Frigga and Odin are- were- his family. His brother is dead, the only thing left a hollow shell.)

And yet, as Loki thought over it- (The way Thor had yelled after him when he let go of Gungnir- The way he had pleaded with Loki with eyes oh, so honest and blue to come home- The way he had cradled Loki's body close to him, as if fearing he would disappear if he loosened his grip-)- he came to realise that perhaps Thor was not lying. For all his years, hardened by battle, bloodshed and betrayal, Thor was still childishly honest.

Somewhere, deep inside Loki, some of the darkness that had threatened to consume him lifted slightly.

"I am sure he will, one day, Prince Thor," Loki said, smiling slightly.

Thor seemed to have forgotten he had been there, as he blinked and processed Loki's words. Then, a small, grateful smile graced the Thunder God's lips. For the first time in a long time, Loki was at ease around Thor- (Around his brother.).

(Not quite a reconciliation, but... for now, it will do.)

A/N: 'Anguem' means 'snake' in latin. I thought it would be fitting.