A/N: So sorry for the wait! After our exams, they decided to jump us with several mock exams so I've been to busy to write. So, updates should slowly return to normal once I catch p with writing. This chapter... Well, I hope it's okay. I'm not thrilled with it, but I really wanted to get it done and it explains a few things more clearly. As always, your responses make me smile and I can't thank you enough for being so patient.

Sigyn knew that Thor would come to speak with her about this sooner or later. She had half expected Hela to say something to him about it. She was not at all surprised when Thor came to her early in the morning while she was sat in the tower's library, telling her of Hela's visit.

She placed the book she had been reading on the arm of the chair and met Thor's eyes. "Before you say anything, ask yourself this: would Loki really want you to speak to me about this?"

Thor seemed to hesitate for a moment, but then continued. "Probably not. But I can't lose him again, Sigyn. Our family has faced far too much death and tragedy... I can't face an eternity of knowing my brother is trapped in that... that bleak nothingness."

She dropped her eyes to the floor. "You know then. About... About his soul."

"I do." Thor sat in an armchair beside her. "How long have you known?"

Sigyn smiled weakly and met Thor's eyes again. "Since just after Nari and Vali died. I found him in our chambers by the fire. I was terrified. He'd clearly been dead for hours. I was about to call for help when he simply opened his eyes." She huffed out a short laugh, shaking her head. "He told me he had gone to see his children- our children. I could... feel that something was wrong with his soul. It was one of many reasons we divorced."

Oh, Sigyn still regretted the day she left for Alfheim, vowing never to return to Asgard. She still remembered, after five centuries, the pain in the depths of her ex-husband's eyes as he watched her leave his rooms, never to return.

And, though she knew that Loki no longer loved her or anyone else, Sigyn still loved him. (But what is more important to the God of Lies? Love or trust? I know he trusts me, and I trust him. Perhaps that is all that truly matters in the end.)

For all his flaws, he was still the man she fell in love with.

She no longer felt inclined to act on her feelings; the time for that had long been and gone. Sigyn only knew that she would stand by Loki's side and help him in any way she could.

"Is there any way to... to repair his soul? Can the damage be undone?" Thor asked.

Sigyn met his pleading gaze. "Thor, you must understand that this is something that is completely new to the Realms. I am beyond knowledgeable in the arts of magic and soul-bonds, but this is like nothing I have ever heard of before. If there is a way to fix it, if there is a cure, I do not know what it is. I have searched for so many centuries and found nothing on this matter. I..." She shook her head. "I do not know what else to do. I have tried speaking with him about it, but he shuts off for days afterwards. He will not tell me anything. Loki knows the consequences of his actions- I have no doubt of that."

Thor's hands clenched into fists, and Sigyn waited for him to reply. But he did not say a thing.

The God of Thunder merely turned and left the library without a word.

Loki sat on a high stool at a workbench in Stark- Tony's lab. He was thinking carefully through his plans, deciding what moves to make next. It was imperative that they found the Time Gem as soon as possible, and there was really next to no reason to delay any longer now that the Aether was in his possession. But did he really want to go straight into Muspelheim? As unlikely as it was, there was always the chance that the Time Gem was in Helheim. (But what if it isn't?)

(What if Thanos already has-)

(No. Stop it. I'd know if he did.)

(Would you? You know how he loves his little mind games; he may just be letting you kill yourself slowly over this, when it's really all hopeless.)

(Shut. Up.)

"Loki, I need to speak with you," Thor's voice boomed in the large room.

Loki spare his brother a glance before returning to his notes in front of him.

"Now," Thor demanded, his tone leaving no room for argument.

(Oh, he's using his 'Odin' voice. How sweet.)

Loki sighed and placed the pen down on the notepad. He met Thor's gaze and crossed his arms, leaning them on the metal workbench in front of him and raising an eyebrow. "Something wrong?"

"Apparently there is rather a lot wrong with your soul."

Loki stilled, practically turning to stone. Tony had gone up to the lounge for something to eat, so there was no one around to witness his reaction other than his brother. And how did Thor know about his soul? No one but Sigyn and Hela knew. Surely they would not tell him? There was nothing he could really say to deny it, seeing the hard look on Thor's face, and so, icily, he demanded, "Who told you?"

"Hela. She summoned me to her as I slept." Thor took slow steps towards him. "When were you going to tell me?"

Loki huffed a laugh. "Do you really think I'm stupid enough to tell you that, of all things?"

"Loki, your soul is practically gone!" Thor boomed, hands stretched out in incredulity.

Loki stood, the stool knocking over. He placed his palms flat on the metal worktop and snarled, "And do you really think I care? Right now, when the very end of the universe is upon us, do you honestly think I care about my damned soul?"

Thor seemed stunned into silence, staring at Loki with wide, blue eyes so full of emotion that he could not bear to look into them any more.

With a wordless snarl, Loki stormed out of the lab. He could hear Thor following him as soon as he reached the elevator, so without hesitation he opened a portal and went up to the lounge.

(Oh, Norns, that makes my head spin. Less of the magic today, then.)

He could feel everyone's eyes on him as he took his usual position by the window. Everyone was awake now, sat by the television; they had been talking quite animatedly until he had shown up. Now their words were hushed. They seemed to sense his dark mood.

Loki hoped- prayed- that Thor would not follow him in here and cause a scene. Not in front of others, anyway. But, of course, luck had not been on his side as of late.

He closed his eyes as he heard Thor enter the lounge, jaw clenching.

"Loki," Thor's voice was loud- almost obnoxiously so- in the quiet room.

He smiled tightly, eyes remaining closed. "Thor."

"Stop being so childish and stop running away."

Hands clenching into fists, Loki turned, glaring at his brother. "This isn't running away. This is acceptance."

"No. I won't have it. I won't let you-"

"Won't let me what?" Loki hissed, painfully aware of their audience.

"You know what."

"What I do is of no concern of yours, Thor, so leave it at that."

"No-"

"Leave it!" He roared. The air around him crackled with magic. It pulled at him, exhausting him even more as it yearned for escape. There was just so much power from the Gems; it wore down his fragile soul. His restraint on the magic was rather weak given his tired state, and so he needed for Thor to just stop now before someone got hurt.

The occupants of the room stiffened, and the warriors were on their feet immediately.

But Thor- the oaf- did not back down. The fool moved towards Loki until there was barely two feet of space between them. Then, in a low voice, he said, "Brother, I can't let you die."

Loki scoffed. "If you've spoken to Hela, then you know it's not uncommon for me."

"But this is different, Loki! This time, should you die, Hela cannot resurrect you!"

(So, my soul is finally at its limit.)

Loki stared at Thor, searching for any trace of a lie. But there was none. All anger drained out of him, and he was suddenly so very, very tired. With a small sigh, he stared at Thor. "If I am to die, then I will do so without fear."

"Hela showed me where you will end up. It's... It's nothing! It's-"

(When I let you die, runt, there will be nothing to comfort you in the afterlife. No soft words, no kind embraces; there will be nothing. And it will be-)

"No more than I deserve," he finished quietly. Loki did not avert his gaze. He needed Thor to understand why he was doing this.

"Loki, you can't possibly-"

"I meant what I said last night, Thor. I'm tired. Of everything. But I'll be damned if I let Thanos get the Gauntlet. Either way, sooner or later, I'm dead. It doesn't matter anymore."

Holy shit. Clint watched the scene unfold with baited breath. What the hell was up with Loki? How had no one known that the guy was this depressed? He was practically suicidal! Damn it, Clint didn't like him, but this... It changed a lot of things about how he saw Loki.

He almost saw him as... Well, human.

"Don't-"

"Damn it, Thor! If there's one good thing I can do in my life, it's stopping Thanos!" Loki cut Thor off. Clint could tell that the God of Mischief was practically begging his brother to hear him out; he'd done that more than once in the past, too. It was beyond frustrating when no one would listen to your side of the story. But, damn... This was just... Clint couldn't find words for it.

"Loki, will you listen to your brother?" It was Sif that broke into the brothers' heated argument. She stood and made her way over.

"This isn't your fight, Sif," Loki said, voice low and threatening.

"This is everyone's fight," the warrior insisted. "And we are not going to stand around while you let yourself get killed." She huffed out a breath and shook her head, eyes wide as she stared at Loki. "We may not be able to change what's already happened, but we can make a difference in the days to come. Loki, let us help you."

Clint could see the anger leaving him, and he just looked completely exhausted. Loki looked at everyone in the room. Clint felt himself stiffen slightly when the disconcerting, familiar-yet-not green eyes found his. They were gone ass soon as they were on him, though, but Clint didn't- couldn't- relax.

A bitter smile that was really more of a grimace found its way onto Loki's face. The God of Mischief shook his head slightly. "Can't be helped," he said quietly, almost breathlessly. Loki swallowed and looked at the floor briefly before meeting Thor's gaze once more. "Muspelheim. That's our next goal. Get the Time Gem, then we can think about heading to Helheim."

And Loki promptly strode out of the room.

No one made a move to follow him.

Fandral was silent that night as he sat around the table with his allies. They were there, not to work with Loki, but rather conspire against him in this case.

The God of Mischief had not been seen for the rest of the day. Sigyn had insisted that they meet that night in the library, and no one had argued. Loki's... condition was worrying, to say the least.

Fandral had been friends with Loki for centuries- he could honestly say, without a shadow of a doubt, that he had by far been closer to him than any of the other warriors. He, too, was quite slenderly built for an Aesir- (Though, of course, Loki is like that for different reasons.)- and was only older in age to Loki by a few months, so as children they had always stuck together. Fandral would admit that he had been cruel to Loki in later years, as were many other children that had been raised in the palace; it filled him with shame to know that he was part of the reason why Loki was in such a mental state in the first place.

And so Fandral sat between Hogun and Sif as they waited for someone to speak up.

"How much do you all know about souls?" Sigyn began.

The mortals exchanged unsure glances. Fandral shifted in his seat. Souls were powerful, pure things. It was dangerous magic to attempt anything with them.

At their silent, Sigyn continued. "The soul is what decides your personality; you are an emotionless shell of a person without it. Its purity decides on where you end up in the afterlife, and the purity of a soul depends on the deeds of someone in their lifetime.

"Souls... they can also be broken. Torn to shreds, frayed at the edges, worn down- call it what you will. This happens when someone is brought back to life. Every time, a part of their soul is destroyed. It is said to be excruciating and irreversible... This is what has happened to Loki. Over the centuries, he had died and been resurrected by Hela far too many times. His soul is... down to its barest threads, if you will. One more tug, and it is gone completely. If Loki dies again, there is little to no chance of him coming back again. And, if he does, he will not be the same.

"We cannot let him go to Muspelheim. We need the Soul Gem. If anything can repair Loki's soul, it is that," Sigyn finished.

Fandral was horrified. Loki had done that to his own soul? What in the Nine Realms would possess him to do that?

"If he knows it's such a bad thing, why-"

"By brother has family in both the Living Realms and the Dead Realms," Thor interrupted Stark.

The mortal fell silent.

"I have sent a message to Hela. We need to know the location of the Soul Gem before we act. She should be here-"

"Now," a crisp voice said from the doorway.

Fandral turned in his seat, hand on the hilt of his sword, only to see none other than Hela, Queen of the Dead, before him. He had only seen her once, as a child when she was being sent away to Niflheim, and she had changed much since then.

Hela moved to stand between Thor and Sigyn. She placed a scroll on the table and unrolled it, revealing it to be an ancient map. "I have marked the safest route. I cannot take you there myself, my oaths forbid it."

"Oaths?" The Lady Romanov questioned.

Hela glanced her way before returning her attention to the map. "I am forbidden from interfering with the affairs of the Living Realms until Ragnarok. Now, the road will still be perilous, and so I would advise that you do not stray far from each other. The souls of Helheim are twisted and vile; no matter what any of them may say or do, do not get close to them, understand?"

"Of course, thank you, Hela," Thor said, nodding.

The Queen of the Dead turned to leave, but Sigyn caught her arm. Losly, the She-Elf said, "Are you going to see your father?"

A sad smile graced Hela's features. "I do not think that would be wise. I'll see him again."

And, with those less than comforting final words, she vanished with a swirl of dark smoke.

Loki paced in his room, doing his best to ignore the pain in his head. They knew. Everyone now knew about his soul. And, to make matters worse, Thor now knew that Loki no longer cared about anything.

(How much will I hurt him due to my own selfishness?)

Oh, he knew the consequences of his actions. He had long suspected that something like this would happen; a soul was needed to pass into Valhalla, Niflheim or Helheim, therefore it only made sense that a soulless creature would be damned to an eternity of nothingness.

But Loki would not give up just yet. He still had to do this one last task.

Thanos would die.

Only when the Mad Titan was dead would Loki finally let go of the Realms of the Living and drift away into the abyss one last time.