Hope you all enjoy this one. Some lemons here so beware! ;D
VamoireElf: Thank you! I plan to continue for as long as you all would like. :D
LizM: For you I will try! I worked on this one for two days instead of one.
Chapter 5
All in all I thought the celebration of my so called birthday had gone very well. Bjorn seemed nice enough and was definitely very attractive. I would be lucky to marry such a man if the situation arose.
I had managed to ignore party goers thoughts and futures and enjoyed myself. I had even been invited to visit a village on the mainland! As long as it was by the sea I knew I would enjoy my time there.
I slept horribly though waking up all through the night. I had horrible dreams of Astrid dead and Ulfrick in Eric's arms. I had them ever since I had seen their future. I would wake up sweating through my nightgown unable to catch my breath. Over and over I would hear the screams of my mother and then I would see Eric shed tears for our family while our father died in his arms. I was confused about where the child and I were? I saw nothing of us in these visions. I dreamed some times of the two small children I had seen in my vision of Eric's future as well. These dreams were not so bad. But it was mostly about the death of my family. I had to try to see them again. I had to know exactly what was happening so I could try to stop it. Maybe if I told them?
"Mama! MAMA! Nooo!" I felt someone beside me in my bed. They pulled me close.
"Shh Oliivi. Shh everything is fine." I heard Eric's voice soothe me.
Opening my eyes and looking at him, "What? What is happening?" I asked.
"You were screaming. I heard you through the walls Olii." He said looking worriedly at me.
I looked down at him taking him in. He wore no shirt only pants and no shoes.
He had been woken up by me. looking back to his face I tried to think of a way to try to see the pictures again without scaring him. Now was my chance.
"It is nothing brother. I am fine. Stay with me?" I asked him innocently. He looked at me for a second almost as if he was trying to figure out how I could hide from him for days then ask him to stay with me. "Please Eric. The nightmares keep coming." I added searching his eyes for confirmation that he would stay.
He hadn't come home until late that night and I assumed one of the lucky ladies who attended left very happy. For some reason this bothered me a little. Maybe it was only the idea that he was making our parents unhappy and putting off his nuptials?
He nodded to me pulling me closer to him his arms wrapping around me. I had to say it was a tad awkward. I was laying facing him but I could feel him breath on me.
I smiled a bit trying to find humor in my brothers silly ways. Ever since I had come here he had made me feel safe. During some of the nights I would climb into his bed to escape the nightmares of our family.
He would always tease me or play games with me to help me fall back asleep. But I was a child then and now I assumed he was a little upset with me. After a short while I could feel his breathing even out and I knew him to be asleep.
I decided this would be my chance to figure out if I could find the pictures again. Pulling my arm free of his grasp I moved my hand to his face running it up and cupping his cheek. I closed my eyes tight and tried to see. Nothing happened! Maybe it was because he was sleeping? I thought maybe that was it.
Taking my other hand free of Eric I added it into the mix cupping his other cheek in my hand and this time I kept my eyes open. I scanned his face as he slept. He was very handsome, my brother. He was well built and had a wonderful personality.
I then started to get a little angry at myself. It was not working! As the anger came to me something started happening almost as if I was encased in a fog. I pulled in a deep breath instantly feeling as if I was suffocating. The first picture came to me again then another and another. Until I couldn't hold on to them anymore and had to let them go. It was exhausting.
The fog left me as I came back to my body. This time I was wheezing loudly and I felt two hands on my wrists. The fog faded and I saw my hands still on Eric's face but this time his eyes were wide open and he was staring at me. "What the hell was that?" He whispered loudly, angrily.
He dropped his hands from my wrists allowing me to pull my hands away, "Nothing! I was just...I was just.." I couldn't even figure out how to save myself from this. He would think I was crazy or that I was trying to kiss him? Who knew!
"It was not nothing. You weren't breathing and you're eyes changed." He couldn't be serious?
Now I am sure I looked crazy, "My eyes changed?" I was officially panicking.
"What was that? And don't you lie to me." He shook me a bit trying to get me to focus.
"I...I don't know I just don't remember." I lied. It was all I could think to do so he wouldn't hate me.
He grunted ad he pulled me back down into a comfortable sleeping position against him. "Go to sleep Oliivi. I will speak of this to mother tomorrow." He said running his hand through my hair. I knew she would understand and I hoped that she would not tell him about me. I was definitely not ready for that yet.
When I woke Eric was already gone. I knew Astrid would wish to talk with me assuming Eric had told her about last night. I decided that today I would train again with Eric. I figured all should be forgiven at some point so I wore pants and boots in preparation of the muddiness that was to come.
I joined Astrid by the fire for breakfast, "Good morning mama." I said leaning into her.
"Good morning my sweet one. Are you well?" She asked with a strange smile on her lips.
"Yes? Why would I be unwell?" I asked.
"Eric told me of last night. Do you wish to talk about it?" She was definitely not worried.
"I was testing myself. I wanted to know if I could control my sight." I said looking into her eyes, "I wanted to know if I could change things."
She was silent a moment allowing me to wake up, "My son seemed very worried for you. He said he woke up to you holding his face but you were gone." She smiled oddly again, "I fear he may worry often about you Olii." She added.
Now I knew what she was saying. She knew something! "He is my brother is that not a normal brotherly trait?" I asked looking for a way out of this talk.
"In some cases yes, that may be true." I didn't like where she might be going with this. "My son puts off marriage to often my dear. I fear he may never marry."I knew this already what was she saying? "I wondered a long while about this Oliivi and I have come to some conclusions." She said turning us to sit against the table. "The way he looks at you is not that of a sister sweet one." She said looking to me, making eye contact, "You are my daughter in so many ways but we do not share blood." She was trying to say it was okay for him to feel that about me? His sister?
"What are you saying?" I asked worriedly. This could not be happening!
"I am only telling you what I have noticed. I have noticed that when we ask him about marriage that you are usually around. I notice the stares he gives you, and I notice how you make him smile. That is all child." She smiled again reassuringly.
"Are you saying that it is okay for him to feel that way about me?" I asked.
"I am saying that he may feel that way for you. It would explain his reluctance to marry and it would explain the patience he has with you. I am also saying that yes it would not be a terrible thing for him to love you." So she was saying that.
What was I supposed to say in return? "We love you. We know you, we raised you, and I think there would be no better person for my son." She said running her hand along my arm.
I was in shock about this though. "I could not marry Eric." I said hurriedly, "He is my brother! But not just that, he is also very...He has needs I am sure no one woman could fulfill." I finished. "This would not make me happy! I would not have a husband who sleeps with the whole village!" I stood up from the table. She was shocked now to.
In our culture it was rather normal for men to stray from their wives. I was sure Ulfrick did from time to time, Didn't he? But something inside me would not allow myself to tie myself to that. I knew what I needed for happiness and a cheating husband was not that.
I did not allow her to finish, instead I ran out of the house and down the paths to the ocean. My safe place.
The weather was turning cold so the water was freezing. I pulled my boots off and walked into the ocean. Even though my feet felt like ice it still made me feel better in a way. Like there was something out there bigger then my problems.
The things I had seen that night with Eric hadn't changed. I saw him with one of our stable girls and then with our father dying. I had seen what looked to be a pack of wolves attack. Then I had seen Eric a few years later dying in the arms of one of his top men. The rest could not be explained.
Clearly he would live through that ordeal. But I hadn't actually seen him die at all through the vision. It seemed he would live for quite a long time. Whatever he was to become I figured it would allow him longevity, so much so that I could not see his entire future.
One of the last things had included myself as well meaning for some reason I had lived as well. I felt the children at my side like I was really there. I knew they had to be mine, my children. Two beautiful blonde boys. That was all I knew of them.
The pictures always only came in short bursts leaving me with many questions. I couldn't tell what year it had been or how old they were, but it didn't really matter in the end, it would happen. I would have to wait to hold them again. Waiting was something I could do.
I felt the water move behind me as Astrid came to my side. She said nothing for a while until I was sure she couldn't keep it in any longer, "I am sorry little one, I fear earlier I may have said things that frightened you." She sighed taking my hand in hers, "I would not force any unhappiness upon you. I love you my daughter." She squeezed my hand. "I fear my love for my son clouded my judgment." She added, still staring out into the still waters.
"I love him to." Was all I said in return, my voice a whisper. And it was true, I did love him. But it did not matter because I would not have my heart broken. I just would not.
I hoped he found someone accommodating later in life to make him happy. I smiled weakly at her letting her hand go, "Come on then, it is to cold for pregnant ladies in the ocean." I pushed her back towards land. I hoped that we wouldn't be to awkward around each other now. I was sure we would recover.
"I am fine really dear." She said wrapping her arm around me and heading back for home.
Astrid and I spent the day together getting things ready for my new sister. We assumed she was close to giving birth and had much to do. We talked most of the day as we worked. I told her some of what I had seen leaving out the parts of his family dead.
"I had sons... They were perfect." I told her folding furs and putting them away. "I held them only a few seconds but I feel like I am missing part of myself now without them." I sat beside her.
"Children are our future Oliivi. Without them how would we go on?" She asked softly. "And what of my son? Do we predict children before I grow old and die?" She laughed as she said this. Her and Ulfrick were getting tired of waiting.
"I saw no children but my own.. It seems he lives a long time though." She nodded looking away to the door. "I saw a healthy sister though." I smiled to her hoping this would bring her happiness.
She smiled back and patted my hands, "That would be nice." She got back up to continue her chores. It wouldn't be long until everything I knew would come to pass.
The baby came only a few days later. It took her two days of labor but we ended up with a beautiful baby sister in the end. Astrid had told the name to Eric and Ulfrick right away after the birth telling them she had been prepared because I had told her it would be a girl.
Drott was small with large blue eyes and a small tuft of blonde hair on her head. She was perfect. She made us all smile and laugh. We loved her.
Eric and I still were not talking much lately. It had been a month since our sister had come to us but I avoided him when I could. I knew he didn't like it but I didn't want to be forced into talking about what happened to me the night he said I was 'gone' and I certainly didn't want to hear him thinking about me.
So I just didn't put myself in those situations. Bjorn had sent word that I was to come to visit him soon and see his home when winter died down. The message came today while I was out and had been given to Astrid.
At dinner when I came in from playing amongst the snow she told us all. I was ecstatic! I thought he was nice. Even if we weren't to marry I would enjoy seeing his home by the sea.
"So I can go? After the snow dies away?" I asked, shoving bread into my mouth.
Eric sat at the end of the table looking away to the door. I shrugged it off. "Yes I am sure we can arrange a trip for you." Ulfrick said smiling to Astrid.
He wanted the benefits that came with his daughter marrying another Jarl.
"Yes I should think it could be arranged." My mother added looking to her son. Her eyes turned sad and she changed the subject to other things. I smiled like an idiot for the rest of it.
After dinner Eric left us out into the night. We didn't see him again that night.
The next day was sunny and bright. I decided I would spend it out in the forest. I even packed a small lunch so I wouldn't have to come back until the night came.
I enjoyed the solitude of the forest. I could spend my whole life amongst the trees. But I said that about the ocean to so who knew? One day I would have a home in the trees by the sea. That was definitely what I wanted.
I dressed in my regular tunic for the winter season, pulling on my furs. I tied my hair up loosely and threw in my leather circlet. No one wold see it but I loved it. It had been a month or two even since I had spent the day in the forest so I was excited, I was pretty much running towards my usual route.
I had avoided the woods since Eric and I stopped training. The area the men used was on the way so I had just simply not gone. When I got to the training grounds I saw Eric as usual with some of the others practicing.
Although, as soon as I walked by he had stopped and watched me run hurriedly into the forest. In fact I would go ahead and say that he looked pissed off as I ran by.
He couldn't have thought I would practice with a sword in my white winter tunic? No that wasn't it.
He was mad about something else. I rushed forward hoping he wouldn't try to follow me. I had spent many days out here with Eric but being alone with him wasn't on the top of my to do list as of late.
I followed the path that formed over the years until I came to a large river. I set my pack down on a rock by the edge and climbed a few rocks so I could sit up high and watch the waterfall over the cliff in front of me.
Laying down on a fur I placed on the rock and I found what warmth I could. I lay there for a while before deciding I wanted to put my feet in.
I climbed down the rocks carefully with my furs and dumped them on my pack. I pulled my boots off throwing them into my stuff. When I turned I smacked into something hard.
"Ouch! Eric what the hell?" I yelled pushing him away. He just looked at me. He wasn't smiling so clearly he wasn't teasing me as he normally would have been doing.
He looked really mad, "Why are you avoiding me?" He asked sternly. I looked up at him trying to think of what to say.
"It's nothing Eric. I wasn't avoiding you okay?" I answered.
Now he just looked plain old worried, "Have I done something? Tell me." He put his hand on my upper arm and held on shaking me a bit.
'Please...I miss you' I was trying to hard to block him out but I couldn't think straight with him so close to me. His thoughts poured through my walls, 'I miss you Oliivi.' I just stood there unable to speak.
He shook me again, "Dammit woman tell me what I have done to you?" He hollered at me.
"It is nothing brother...I just needed space." I said as a tear streaked my cheek. "You're just different lately is all." I added.
He grunted and loosened his grip but not letting go fully. "I am just adjusting to everything Oliivi." He said, "I just don't know what to say to you anymore. Then Bjorn shows up and you ignore me completely. You won't spend any time with me!" He started spilling it all to me. He said it so fast I couldn't keep up, "Then you let me into your bed only to scare me! Mother won't tell me what happened to you. You won't tell me. I..What am I supposed to do to fix this?" He asked tightening his hand on my arm again. I placed my hand on his cheek lightly pulling his forehead to mine.
"All is forgiven Eric. I am sorry." I whispered. I was sorry to.
My brother would get this look sometimes that broke my heart. It was a look I had seen in his future and also right now. The sadness he felt showed.
He let go of my arm and put his hand on mine against his cheek. He wiped the tears away from mine with the other.
"I missed you." I said smiling a sad smile. He grunted again still not smiling. His eyes pointed down to my dress. I wondered what he was thinking right then.
Laughing to myself I listened, 'So beautiful. So perfect.' it went on a while, 'Love you.' At the last one my eyes shot up to his in shock.
I removed my hand and tried to pull back. Eric grabbed my waist instead and pulled me closer. he pushed the hair from my face and kissed me. It was fast and a little silly. I squealed a bit out of pure astonishment.
He pushed harder and slid his tongue along my bottom lip trying to gain entrance. Surprising myself I let him in pulling him closer to me by his hair. He lifted me atop the rock behind us and set me on it allowing my legs to surround him.
I pulled him up to my face again kissing him. He was a really good kisser to. He ran his hands up my thighs slowly pulling me closer to him.
His hands were cold, sending chills straight to my core. Goosebumps formed all over my skin. I had no boots on or any heavy under garments so it was pretty cold for me. But I didn't stop him.
His hands pushed my dress up until I was bared to the crisp cold air around us. My cheeks were bright red from embarrassment. I had never been naked in front of Eric like this before.
The ocean incident didn't count because then he had just been my brother.
His mouth pulled away from mine and he looked down at me and then back up to my face again. Right into my eyes. I saw him then, the same Eric I had grown up around. Filled with life. I couldn't hold it in anymore as I reached down and stroked his face lovingly as I smiled lazily at him.
His hand came to me this time running up my folds lightly. still looking right at me as he slid a finger inside me. I moaned and fell back against the rock. Now he was definitely smiling as he pushed my dress up a little more and put his mouth on me, his eyes never leaving mine.
"Eric!" I clung to the sides of my tunic and he worked his tongue along my sensitive folds. his finger moved in and out slowly.
I felt something building inside me but I held on tight and let it wash over me, "Eric! Eric please." I whimpered.
He stopped a moment and looked down at me, "Why? Why are you stopping?"I asked lifting myself up a bit to look at him.
"Marry me Oliivi. Say you won't go visit Bjorn. Stay here with me?" He smiled as his finger slid back inside me. Gods! It felt so good.
"Eric!" I yelled his name as his tongue found me again.
Something amazing hit my body causing me to fall down the rock towards him, into his arms. He pulled my face back to his and kissed me again allowing me to taste myself on him. And I let him for a short while before my brain registered what he said.
I pushed away and started pulling my boots back on. "Oliivi what is wrong?" He asked trying to make eye contact again, "Oliivi?" He said again.
I stood up straight and looked right at him, "NO!" I yelled.
"No?" He asked.
"NO! No I will not marry you! Are you crazy?" I couldn't hold it in any longer.
"I am not crazy. I saw you! You wanted me!" He said loudly. "You love me Olii! I know you're looks and you look at me with love!" He was yelling back at me now.
"It doesn't matter that I love you! It doesn't matter Eric!" I inhaled and started again, "It doesn't matter that I love you." The end of it I had whispered.
He was furious I knew it, "WHY DOESN'T IS MATTER?" He grabbed me hard.
"BECAUSE! BECAUSE I REFUSE TO SIT AROUND AT HOME ALL DAY WHILE YOU FUCK THE WHOLE DAMN VILLAGE. I won't be that wife Eric!" I said pulling away and grabbing my bag and fur.
It wasn't often I swore at him but I felt this called for it. without looking back at him I left towards home. It wasn't much longer now. Eric was leaving for a while to search for treasures. I wouldn't have to avoid him because he would be gone.