Chapter Two

The first time, even when he knows everything as Harry has explained it all to him, Teddy shivers in dread at the upcoming night and later cries and cries in his ward.

The pain, the agony…God, it's too much.

"I'll die. I'm going to die."

Moony; he knows now why they called his father that. For the first time in thirteen years, he realises that nobody had ever told him what a monster his dad had been. He had always known his dad had been a werewolf but not actually known it.

He remembers seeing himself in the mirror that is kept in the Shrieking Shack, the snout, the fur, the eyes, the teeth! He is like a nightmare. He can't understand why his father would do this to him.

Moony is going to kill me He thinks hysterically before Madam Pomfrey decides to subdue him with a pain-killing potion.

OOooooOO

Sirius's heart aches at the way Teddy clings to Harry when the older man pulls him into a hug. He is starting to look so much like Remus had been at thirteen with his brown hair, an indication of his moroseness.

"I didn't know. I didn't know Dad was like this," Teddy keeps repeating into Harry's suit as the man awkwardly pats his hair. "Why my dad?"

They know that what he really wants to ask is 'Why me?'

"It was an accident, Teddy," Sirius finds himself whispering and Harry looks at him.

"I hate him," Teddy says and it's muffled against Harry's body but the effect is instantaneous as Harry freezes with his hand on top of his godson's head and Sirius is shocked, he is so shocked that he is rooted to the spot; bombarded with thoughts of Remus being shunned, Remus crying as a child, Remus so disheartened whenever he encountered the rest of the world.

"Don't say that, Teddy," Sirius finally says. Remus had never deserved anybody's hate and certainly not his son's. He knows if Remus were alive, he would have swallowed the lump in his throat and given Teddy some space but Sirius can't be like that, he can't just let Remus be tainted this way.

"Why?" Teddy asks furiously, his eyes shining with tears and his wounds stand out harshly against his pale skin. "He made me like this. I'm like this because my dad was a—a monster."

"Teddy!" Harry exclaims loudly but all Sirius can hear is the ringing of Teddy's words.

"And you lied to me!" Teddy shouts at Sirius as he holds on to the railings of the bed, "all of you, never told me anything about this—about him being like—"

"Shut up, Teddy!" Sirius finally snaps and the young boy's eyes widen. "You know nothing. Nothing about Remus, so don't you dare call him a monster." Teddy looks torn between keeping silent and not; he decides on the latter.

"You're the one who doesn't know anything. He was my father." He is shouting right back.

"And you never even met him, Teddy—"

"Sirius! Enough! Both of you!" Harry shouts at last as the tears in Teddy's eyes finally trickle down his face. Sirius numbly watches him as he angrily swipes at his eyes as he turns away; Sirius's unspoken words hang in the air and guilt threatens to engulf him as he realises his own cruelty.

He turns on his heel and exits the hospital wing.

Harry finds him later on in Minerva's office, ready to Floo back to his house. His godson looks like he wants to talk to him and Sirius is ready to give him the cold shoulder but he speaks up.

"I talked to him," Harry tells him and Sirius sighs.

"How is he?" Because Merlin, Teddy had looked ashen and so much in pain even now. "Did you get to ask why the wolfsbane didn't help?" Harry nods as he runs a hand through his hair.

"He's resting. It's his first time, even with the wolfsbane, the transformation itself is supposedly very taxing." Sirius understands that and his heart goes out to the boy but he had had no right to express such an awful sentiment about Remus.

"Sirius," Harry says quietly, "I think you should talk to him. Properly." Harry's words make Sirius feel so ashamed of himself that he feels like he's the godson here.

"I think I may be the last person Teddy wants to see right now, Harry," Sirius tells him dejectedly but Harry looks like he has more to add, even frowning a little.

"Sirius, I know you were upset," Harry says slowly, "but Teddy didn't deserve that."

"I know," Sirius replies hoarsely and rubs a hand over his face, "I'm such an arse, aren't I?" Harry smiles a little at that.

"Yeah, you kind of were." He admits but then gets serious, "But you're also the only person who can make Teddy see what Remus was like, Sirius." Sirius looks at him.

"You knew him too, Harry."

"But it's not the same, is it?" Sirius agrees with him silently but he does not know how he will make Teddy see the great man that Remus was. But Harry is still looking at him expectantly and Sirius sighs.

"I'll try, alright; so don't get your hopes up." Despite his words, Harry looks immensely relieved. Sirius scowls because he can't afford to look nervous.

Sirius finds Teddy sitting up; face turned towards the window, his brown hair slumped against the pillows. He turns towards Sirius even before he says a word with a slight frown.

"I knew you were coming…I could feel it." Teddy sounds absolutely miserable. "I'm like an animal now."

"No, Teddy. Don't say that," Sirius says sternly as he comes closer to the bed. "Can I sit?" He motions to the chair in front and Teddy nods.

"Werewolves are as much humans as we—I or Harry—are, Teddy."

"But—"

Sirius interrupts his feeble words. "I know you think that your father was a monster, but Teddy, he had no choice either. Your dad—" Sirius has to pause to swallow the lump in his throat before continuing, "Your dad was such a good man, Teddy, I'm sorry I acted the way I did—"

"'S okay," Teddy tells him hurriedly but Sirius places a hand on Teddy's arm.

"No, it's not," he tells Teddy intensely. "Do you know, that's the exact kind of thing Remus would have said? He was always so…nice, Teddy. People liked him, even Slytherins, which is saying something." Teddy's ears perk up at that.

"Now you're just making things up, right?" Sirius denies it with a smile.

"Not at all. What I'm saying, Teddy, is that, meeting your father was the best thing that ever happened to me, and him being a werewolf didn't change anything."

"I—" Teddy looks down at his hands, "I didn't really mean it when I said that I—that I hated him. I don't. I was just so angry."

"I know, and again, I'm sorry for the way I behaved. He was only five when he was bitten." Teddy looks shocked to hear that. Sirius hadn't meant to say it yet though.

"F—five?" Teddy sounds shaken, "You're telling me—he was—j—just a kid?" Sirius doesn't comment on his sudden stuttering; it's understandable. And all of a sudden it's clear as a day what Sirius has to do. He joins Teddy on the bed and sits gingerly beside the gangly teenager.

"Do you want to know about him? About Moony the Marauder's story?" Teddy nods and Sirius tells him. He tells him about a boy who had loved the beach, of a boy who loved annoying his mama by changing all the drinks in their house to chocolate, who was the target of vengeance by a werewolf named Greyback, of his first days at Hogwarts and on and on till Sirius finishes spinning the tale for Teddy how he has always seen Remus's life.

"What happened to Greyback?" Teddy asks sleepily from his spot beside Sirius as his head finds a resting spot on Sirius's shoulder.

"He died. The same night, in the battle of Hogwarts." When he had been behind that strange veil.

"What about you? Where were you?" Teddy asks curiously as he raises his head to look at Sirius and the older man smiles sadly.

"That's a story for another time, Teddy." Teddy doesn't push it and instead leans into Sirius again.

"I missed talking to you. You're always so busy now," Teddy tells him earnestly because he is still at that age where he can get away with a little clinginess. Sirius's heart warms a little at the words.

"You'll probably be seeing more of ol' Padfoot now, don't you worry, kid." Teddy scowls at that.

"I'm not a kid!" he manages to grumble but then wraps an arm around Sirius's torso as he leans all of his weight on to the man. "I'm glad dad had you guys. D'you think I can still have my friends too?"

"I don't know, Teddy," Sirius replies honestly. "But yeah, I'm glad too, that your dad didn't always have to be alone."

Sometimes he thinks of how Remus must have felt after he had fallen behind the veil.

"I like you, Sirius." Teddy's voice is soft. "If my friends leave me, will you—"

"Your friends won't leave you," Sirius reprimands him and then softens his tone, "but I'll be here, I'll always be here for you."

"Hey there, come on now, it's okay." Teddy shivers as his joints ache when Sirius cleans the blood off him. It's awful, especially without the wolfsbane. He can hear clinks of glass and knows Madam Pomfrey is already there in the shack, helping Sirius with his task. God, he is such a child sometimes. He tries to push up into a sitting position.

"Don't do that yet." Sirius holds him down firmly by a shoulder and strokes his hair away from his forehead. "We'll just patch you up in a bit, alright?" And then Sirius would be gone again until the next full moon. They never see each other anymore outside of these encounters or the holidays. He tries to squeeze Sirius's hand before Madam Pomfrey injects a potion into him and he blacks out.

Teddy wakes up with dreams of a mermaid dancing in the air while a dog wagged its tail in time to that horrible song 'Toxic'. Which also reminds him of Thomas and…

"I want a mobile phone," is the first thing Teddy says to nobody but his statement is met with a chuckle that forces him to open his eyes.

"A mobile phone? Why the sudden wish to get one of those?" Sirius asks interestedly, not like his grandmother who had frowned and looked like a mobile phone was an unnecessary toy that Teddy did not need. He thinks it's the technology in it that scares her but she will never admit it.

"Everyone has them," Teddy manages to grumble, "even babies are born with mobile phones." Sirius is so amused by his words that he barks out in laughter before standing up from his seat.

"Hmm, you should get some sleep, Teddy. I'll see you later." He says that every time.

"Until the next full moon, you mean?" Teddy replies snappishly and for a second he thinks Sirius looks guilty but the man just ruffles his hair with a smile.

"Get some sleep." He is gone with that and Teddy tries to think of what he could have done to be dismissed like that by Sirius for the hundredth time.

OOooooOO

"Why didn't you say something about this before?" Sirius can't understand why Pomfrey is so relaxed about all this. "Harry or I could have gotten it for you if we were told that the potion ran out." Harry nods at that as he looks worriedly at the curtain a few feet away.

"Mr. Black." This woman still treats him like the naughty boy he had been once. "If Wolfsbane was licensed to be in the market, I would have procured it for Edward."

"What about Professor Slughorn?" Harry asks her and elaborates. "I remember Snape brewing it for Remus when he taught here." Pomfrey's lips thin at that.

"It takes somebody very skilled to brew a potion of that level, Mr. Potter. Besides, obtaining the ingredients isn't easy." Harry will not risk it and he knows that Hermione will do it in a heartbeat if asked but with the elections coming up, she has too much on her plate as Secretary to Kingsley. But then she did work herself to the bone during school…

"I'll do it," Sirius says determinedly, breaking the silence and Harry looks at him in surprise.

"You heard her, Sirius; it's a very complicated potion." Sirius smiles for the first time that day.

"Tell you a secret; I used to be one of the best in our year. It's just that Slughorn had eyes for only Snape and your mum." Harry's shoulders sag in relief at his godfather's words; he can't see Teddy broken and torn like this again. But Sirius is impulsive and overestimates his abilities a bit, doesn't he?

"Alright, now. Where do I find the recipe?" Sirius asks Pomfrey with a doggy grin. Harry stops worrying knowing it will be alright when Sirius puts his mind to things like that.

Teddy is fifteen, almost sixteen now and he isn't exempt from the bouts of teenage angst that attacks everybody at this time. He has crossed the stage of spindly arms, the bony body, the childish face and is starting to attract far more attention than he is used to since his Black genes are starting to show. Or maybe that has something to do with his recent trouble-makings with his best friend Charles. And he really is the best apart from Victoire given his 'No way, seriously? So what happens?' and a million questions as reply to his confession of lycanthropy.

He goes out with a Ravenclaw named Samantha and when that doesn't work out, then Margaret and somebody else before he gives in to Victoire's pestering; he loves the girl but she can be such a...girl. It just doesn't do anything for his body as much as he likes talking to any of them; apparently he is the bad date if he is a gentleman and doesn't grope them on the first date. He does not acknowledge his possible attraction for Bailey Wood.

It's shockingly a page from his dad's journal that he finds during the Easter holidays and opens it after some attack from the book and managing to conjure the invisible writing in it that allows Teddy to explore his other urges.

I think I like him. I'm scared but I've seen him look too. I hope it isn't just me, because I think I may be falling in love with Sirius.

One line and it had left Teddy feeling sick, hopeful and unsure all at once. His dad and Sirius? What did this mean for his parents?

It's okay to like boys. It's okay to want them. But Teddy doesn't know if his father ever acted upon his feelings. He turns to a page some time later to find it. There is a picture of a younger Sirius—he was so handsome even then—with his dad, just standing and smiling so large—

And then he kisses his father showily before being hit by a blur of something by whoever was clicking the picture.

Teddy stares as the motion repeats itself over and over again, he feels a throb of something akin to arousal at that; Sirius has beautiful lips—

Teddy tears his eyes away from the picture, feeling slightly sick yet excited. There is only one scrap of parchment torn and glued underneath it in an elegant script.

I miss you so much, Moony.
–Love, Padfoot.

Sirius's hands make Teddy feel like a mass of aching joints and skin with piles of bones in it. It always hurts so much even after all the fun Teddy has had playing with Padfoot and then cuddling up into fur balls to sleep. As always, Sirius's hands work their magic and potions are swallowed before the pain starts to recede and Teddy starts feeling human again.

"That's disgusting," Teddy comments when a green potion goes down his throat and Sirius spares a smile at him before looking for the relief-balm. Teddy lies back down on the bed and looks at him, eyes heavy; Sirius's hair is getting longer, kind of girly but it adds character to him somehow. It looks good on him.

Sirius helps him with the balm where he can't reach and it is an accidental slip when Sirius's hand brushes against the curve of his buttock but it causes Teddy to stiffen and Sirius apologises before continuing his application on his lower back.

Teddy bites his lip and continues lying on his stomach as he calms down and feels the slight tinge of arousal fading. Anything turns him on these days. And this is Sirius, of all people.

Stupid hormones.

AN:And that's the end of chapter two. Reviews are appreciated!