Reviewer Request: The lovely reviewer simply called Diamond asked for this "What if Darcy got captured so she tries to summon the hammer so she can save herself?" I took this request and tried to make it all you wanted it to be, but my mind and fingers got away from me and something else happened. I hope you enjoy it all the same.

The One in Which Mjolnir is Lassie

Don't freak out, don't freak out, don't freak out. Darcy was totally freaking out. A couple of hours ago she'd been nabbed off the street while on her weekly market shopping excursion, and thrown into the back of a van. The baddies had immediately, and embarrassingly easily, hog tied and blindfolded her. The drive, luckily, to the bad guy lair hadn't taken all that long. Which meant she wasn't that far away from rescue. The problem was no one would know she needed rescuing. They wouldn't realize anything was wrong until they showed up for dinner, and noticed the suspicious lack of lasagna. Tuesdays were lasagna, and Darcy's lasagna was legendary, so they would definitely know something was up when nine o'clock rolled in and there was none to be had. The problem again was that Darcy always left the Tower early in the mornings to do all of her Tuesday Lasagna shopping, and by her gauge, it couldn't be more than two in the afternoon.

That was a lot of hours in which bad guys could do bad things to her poor, squishy self. Dating, being engaged to, the God of Thunder hadn't really prepared her for this situation. In hindsight, it should have, but Thor was always really great about not letting harm come to her. Thinking of Thor helped calm her racing heart so she focused on him.

She pictured the way he smiled every time she handed him a mug of coffee. She'd tell him no smashing and he'd grin boyishly at her, it always melted her. She pictured him in the early mornings, sun slanting in on his golden hair, kissing her sleepily until they were sinking into each other for some beautiful mornin' lovin'. She pictured him laughing a full body laugh while sparring with Hulk, and being told by Steve that he did the same thing in battle. Then she pictured him in battle, footage of the doom bot incident she totally wasn't supposed to see, and how he looked so gorgeously powerful summoning his hammer just to throw it at a doom bot's head.

Then it hit her. Thor summons Mjolnir when he's in need of her, it, whatever. She could do that, and totally save herself. She wasn't exactly sure how it was done, but she gave it the old college try. Closing her eyes she pictured Mjolnir flying into her hand, pushing the thought of dire need of the hammer out in case it was a telepathy thing.

Thor, Tony, and Steve were in the old gym gearing up for an epic sparring match. Tony had a new suit made from vibranium, thank you T'Challa, that he desperately wanted to test against Thor's hammer. Thor, always up for a spar, was gripping Mjolnir tightly ready to strike as soon as Tony gave the go word. When, suddenly, the hammer started to jerk in his hand, as if it was trying to leave his grip. He tightened his grip reflexively, looking down at Mjolnir curiously. Steve noticed the hammer's strange behavior too.

"What's going on with your hammer, Thor?" at his question Tony looked up from his unfinished gauntlet. He retracted his facemask and eyed Thor's hammer oddly.

"Mjolnir is being summoned." Thor answered distractedly. Then the lightbulb went on and he shouted.

"Mjolnir is being summoned! Darcy!"

With that, he was off, Mjolnir pulling him in the direction of his betrothed. Steve and Tony were right behind him, with Steve calling in the rest of the team. In remarkable time they made it to the dilapidated warehouse, why was it always a warehouse? Without stopping, trusting the Cap and Iron Man to take out the enemy, Thor followed Mjolnir to where it was summoned. He burst through a wall hammer first into the small room Darcy was crouched in. her eyes had been shut tight in concentration, hand outstretched waiting when he'd made a Thor shaped hole in the wall. She grinned widely, relief obvious, and jumped straight into his waiting arms.

"Did I totally summon Mjolnir or what? 'Cause I didn't expect you to be attached." Thor kissed her hard before answering.

"Your summoning of my weapon alerted us to your situation. We followed Mjolnir to you."

"So, what you're saying is Mjolnir is Lassie." And Darcy couldn't deal. Her stomach hurt from the hysterical laughter. Thor was confused as usual, though he was sure that she was insulting his mighty hammer again. He was too relieved for her safety to be offended. So he wasn't going to ask her what a Lassie was.

Later, when everyone (especially Tony) started calling his hammer Lassie he looked up the reference. He was highly offended, even though he could see the similarity, and was only appeased when Darcy introduced his "hammer" to doggie style. She also managed to convince the others to stop calling Mjolnir Lassie, to his face anyway. Except in Tony's case, where hammer and dog jokes were a constant source of entertainment.