A/N

Sorry for the delay. After getting over this eight day, whatever it was, (monster cold?) I had to get back to my real life world and the story was just not working for me. About 2/3 of this chapter was banged out this morning. Sorry for any mistakes.

As always, I don't own Rizzoli and Isles.

Ch. 6

Maura feared Angela would eventually bring up her little reminder she left on the counter for Jane so, she had to find a way to keep that from happening.

"Jane?"

"Hmm?"

"I know it was difficult to talk about the miscarriage when it happened …" Jane looked up from the book she'd been lost in and caused Maura to lose some of her nerve to continue her line of questioning.

With the bookmark saving the page she last read, attention now settled on the woman sitting directly across from her, Jane beckoned Maura to continue.

Maura took a deep breath and forged on. "I know it wasn't a planned pregnancy and you hadn't experienced the gamut of what a pregnancy entails…what I mean to ask is, were you excited at all about having a child?" Whew.

Jane pondered whether Maura's curiosity stemmed from the desire to know about her state of mind at the time of such an emotional and stimuli-drenched event or, whether she currently felt a need to complete a journey that was cut short. If she were being honest with herself, Jane would have to admit, she'd been contemplating the same question.

Not wanting to deny the woman she loved the chance to gain some insight to her own inter-workings, Jane decided to come from a position of curiosity as well. "What brought you to this subject?" Jane's attempt to discover Maura's intentions could have been construed as defensive but, she had hoped her delivery was full of love and tenderness.

Maura had sensed Jane's unease to revisit a difficult time in her life however, she also knew that Jane was open to start a dialogue since she hadn't completely shut her down.

"The thing is, I had enjoyed helping to take care of you during the brief period. I loved making sure you took your vitamins, suggesting healthy meal alternatives, and caring for your overall well being." Maura spoke, finally able allow her feelings to flow. "Was there any part you enjoyed or looked forward to?"

Jane took on a pensive air. She sat up, tossed the book on the coffee table and looked into her girlfriend's eyes. "I enjoyed you taking care of me." Jane smoldered. "Even if, I acted like a child."

Maura felt the pit of her stomach tighten. Only Jane could make her feel so turned on with a simple declaration.

"I still do take pleasure in keeping you healthy." Maura attempted to equally burn her affection into Jane with words.

Jane scooted her body closer to Maura on the couch. She reached for Maura's left hand and gently placed it on her own stomach, her hands covering the doctor's. "I don't think I could ever fully explain or describe the loss I felt, still feel but, I can say, I was only able to get through it because I had you."

Maura's eyes prickled at the sentiment. The show of thoughtfulness on her partner's part only made Maura's desire to see another Jane Rizzoli added to her world.

Physically connected to Jane at that moment sent Maura into action. Reaching for Jane's hands and motioning for her to get up, she asked "Will you allow me to show you something?"

Shooting a questioning look, Jane decided to grant Maura's request. "Sure."

The interim between Maura's discovery of Angela's "little gift" and the evening of Maura's attempt to confess her plans for hers and Jane's future, Maura had hidden the baby shoes in the depth's of the hallway storage closet.

Now, usually when Maura had a surprise for Jane, the air was filled with excitement and anticipation. This trip to the closet had neither of these qualities. Thus, instilling Jane with the unfamiliarity of a slight nervous panic.

"Jane…" Maura purred. "What I'm about to show you is not akin to the surprise role-play scenario from two weeks ago nor is it malicious in nature."

Jane's smirk, after remembering the baseball fantasy, changed to a look of relief with Maura's assurance.

"I have an idea of how you'll take this because I had some fairly strong feelings about it myself." Maura prefaced before the big reveal.

Jane watched in wonder as Maura pulled out an unmarked box.

Maura handed the box to Jane and motioned for her to open it. The sound of the cardboard top sliding up surrounded the women.

Jane's wonder deflated and was replaced with confusion when she took in the image of miniature footwear that she couldn't, herself, find any use for.

Maura stared at her love, counting the seconds to when the metaphorical light bulb would switch on.

She had only reached 12 by the time Jane looked from the shoes to Maura and to the note written in the familiar scrip of her mother, causing a moment of clarity.

"Oh, Maur. I'm so sorry. She's gotten to going after you, now?" Jane empathized.

Maura found herself a bit flummoxed. She didn't quite know what to expect from the often hot-headed detective but, she was almost certain this calm, nearly easiness, was not an option. Will she ever stop surprising her? She hoped not.

Inversely, the doctor needed to rectify the dark thoughts and worries she harbored with Jane's somewhat blasé attitude.

Maura's inter-monologue continued, was Angela's action aimed more towards her?

Jane noticed the crease on Maura's forehead begin to scrunch. "What's the matter, hon?'

Maura's stomach tensed as she tried to attempt a reply. "I have to admit, I'm a little surprised you're response was not a bit or even a lot stronger than what you just showed."

The sting of tears began to hit the doctor and Jane took notice. "Maur, what is it?" Jane questioned and rushed to embrace the sad doctor.

Maura's hesitation stemmed from fear that expressing her true thoughts and fantasies of raising a mini Jane would be too much of a rush in their fairly new, altered, relationship.

"I can't tell you." Maura stated, exacerbated.

"You can tell me anything, Maur. I love you." Jane effused.

Maura felt, deep down, that this was true but, there is always that chance that Jane could be spooked and she would go running.

"I don't want to scare you off." Maura whispered, just below Jane's right ear.

"Maura, I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Jane kissed Maura on the cheek and stared her in the eyes.

Maura shuddered in Jane's arms. So Jane continued.

"Maur, I know I'm not quick to share my feelings or concerns when I have them but with you, I'm willing to expose myself. You make me feel safe and validated. I want you to know that you can be the same with me. I am dedicated to this," Jane points between them. "to us. You're stuck with me forever." Jane gave a quick smirk.

Maura let out a snort. The tension rolling off her shoulders.

"You make me feel so loved and understood, more so than anyone has ever done. You make me feel safe and validated, as well." Maura replied and then took Jane's face in both of her hands. "I love you so much."

Tension, fears, children, miscarriages forgotten for a moment, while the two women held on to each other as they were each other's only lifeline.

Jane wiped away the two tears that had escaped each of Maura's eyes. Wary she would ruin the moment but needing to know what had Maura so upset just minutes ago, Jane opened her mouth to speak. "What's on your mind, sweetie. What can I do or say to help you?"

Maura pulled slightly away from Jane's body but still held on to the detective's hand. She sat them down on the bench against the hallway wall. "The thing is, when I saw the shoes and read the note, I thought it would upset you. Bring up the loss from your miscarriage. That's why I hid them. I suppose what I hadn't expected was how it would effect me. I was reminded of the loss. I was upset. I never told you, never really admitted to myself, that I had so many plans for your baby. I dreamed of his or her future. Our future, as a family." Clarity dawned on Jane and Maura rolled on. "We weren't romantic at the time but, you had turned Casey down and hope began to bud in me. I decided I would make myself available to you and your baby in any capacity you would allow." Maura paused to breath.

Jane found her chance to jump in. "Maura, I had no idea all of this had been weighing on you. I wish you would have said something." Jane said as she reached her hand around Maura's back to give her waist a squeeze.

"I wouldn't say it's been weighing on me." Maura tried diffuse Jane's guilt.

"Maur, come on. You're gonna break out in hives. Tell the truth." Jane admonished. "Okay…so, what is it?" Jane was mystified. All she wanted to do was comfort this wonderful woman but, she couldn't fix the problem without knowing what was wrong.

"Jane, once I put it out there, there's no turning back. What I say can't be unsaid." Maura warned.

"You want us to have a child." It wasn't a question. Jane had caught on to the common denominator. The baby shoes. Her miscarriage.

"Jane, It's too much, too soon. We haven't been dating all that long to be talking about building a family." Maura spoke with worry. Though, something had struck the doctor, whom was often apt to glaze over certain social situations. Jane told Maura she loved her and Maura had also said the same three words to Jane.

Both women had been so caught up in the that they had a delayed reaction their professions of love.

"Wait. You love me?" Maura questioned Jane, bewildered.

"You love me?" Jane asked back.