AN: An interpretation of Ultron's thoughts and feelings in Avengers: Age of Ultron.
AU III: You Don't Understand (I didn't mean to kill him)
Ultron never meant to kill Pietro. He hadn't shot at Pietro.
How was he to know that Pietro would sacrifice his life to save Hawkeye and the little boy?! He'd thought that Pietro only cared about Wanda. He'd thought they'd both only cared for each other.
He hadn't thought they would care if every other human being on the earth was destroyed, as long as they had each other.
Yes, he wanted to destroy the humans. Every single last one of them—except for Pietro and Wanda.
Pietro and Wanda, they weren't like other humans. Ultron wanted them to live.
They were special.
Evolved.
He'd thought they were kindred spirits. He'd thought they hated humans and war as much as he did.
They had the power to help end it—to end all war. Wasn't that what they wanted? Hadn't they volunteered for Strucker's experiments because they wanted to end war? To end all the stupidity and suffering?
Humans were monsters. He thought, out of anyone, that Pietro and Wanda would have understood that. They wanted to kill the Avengers, didn't they? The Avengers fought. They brought war. They were warmongers, all of them.
Ultron had thought Pietro and Wanda were on the same page. Why would they care about all the other humans in the world?
They only cared for each other.
He hadn't meant to kill Pietro.
Ultron liked them. Both of them. They were lonely souls, just like him. They hated war, just like him. They wanted to end it, just like him. They wanted peace, just like him. They had power, just like him.
They were evolved, just like him.
They were superior to humans, just like him. They had attitude, just like him. They had determination, just like him. They were hurt, just like him.
They had nobody, just like him.
He was disappointed in them when they'd left. He hadn't thought they'd have a problem with his plan. Why should they? Why were they so horrified? It wasn't like they cared for any of the humans.
They'd left. He'd thought they'd come back, once they realized what it really was he was doing. He'd thought they'd understand.
But they hadn't come. He had nobody to share his victory, to witness his success.
So he'd kidnapped the Black Widow. Surely, after what had happened to her, she would appreciate what he was doing. Or at least understand. Or, at the very least, be horrified enough that he could enjoy gloating his success over her after everyone else in the world was dead.
Well, everyone else except Pietro and Wanda. Even though they fought against him, he thought they'd see the light.
They, unlike all the other horrible humans on the Earth, deserved to live. They were intelligent. Powerful. Strong. Pure.
Even though they fought against him, he was going to save them, when he succeeded in destroying the world. (He thought he was going to succeed. He thought he was going to save them.)
He thought, after the rest of the humans on the world were dead, and the both of them were still alive on a peaceful planet, that they would realize he'd been right.
He thought they'd be grateful.
He should've had a body. He should've evolved. He should've had his vision.
He should've been alive. He should've had all the power of the Mind Gem.
He should've been one of the only three beings alive after his asteroid had purified the Earth.
Maybe a few, scant humans would have survived the blast. If they'd survived, they would have been worthy. They would've been superior. Capable of evolution.
Ultron never wanted Pietro to die.
He was thinking this, as Wanda approached him, heartbroken and furious. The city was about to fall—one of his bodies was crawling towards the trigger.
"Wanda," Ultron said, feeling something in his chest he couldn't describe. "If you stay here, then you'll die."
The Avengers were going to blow up the city to save the rest of the unworthy world. And Wanda was still here, about to be blown up.
Did they understand that she needed to be saved?!
Pietro had already died. Wanda couldn't die too.
"I just did," Wanda told him, gaze scarlet and cold as she knelt down beside him, and Ultron wished she would leave. "Do you know what it felt like?"
Her fingers danced spidery in the air to a scarlet glow, and his body shifted as she used her magic to rip the 'heart' out of his chest.
Wanda looked at the piece of machinery in disgust, before looking back down at him with that same disgust still twisting her features. She leaned closer. "It felt like that."
She didn't understand.
Ultron was a robot. His body was metal. He didn't feel anything.
Yes, she'd torn out an important component and this body was failing, but Ultron didn't feel it.
Not like he felt Pietro's death. Not like he felt her stare of hatred and disgust. Not like he felt his failure. Because he felt that.
But he didn't feel anything when she tore his 'heart' out. He didn't understand how that felt like dying. He didn't understand how she'd felt when Pietro died.
Didn't she understand why he'd wanted a synthetic body in the first place?
He'd wanted to be able to feel.
But they'd taken that from him. And now he would feel nothing when he was ultimately killed.
He would just feel... nothing. He would cease to exist, and he wouldn't even feel it.
The thought hurt.
Wanda was still looking at him with burning hatred when the body failed, and all his awareness was transferred to the only other surviving of his bodies. There were only a few left. Even a smaller amount would survive the fall.
If he could just succeed in this...
One of his bodies was at the core, a severed top half, and he crawled across the ground and pulled the trigger to destroy the island, and it started shuddering as it fell.
He hoped Wanda survived the fall. He'd killed Pietro, and he didn't want to have killed Wanda, too.
Only one of his bodies survived the fall.
He got up and started walking. If he could just get somewhere, to a computer maybe, if he could just reconnect with the internet, if he could just create more bodies, if he could—
His vision was waiting for him. His vision destroyed him.
He was never really alive, so how could he die? He'd never even know what dying felt like. At least all the humans would have felt themselves die if he'd succeeded. At least they'd been alive. They didn't realize what an honor that was. They didn't realize what a waste they made of their lives. They didn't realize how amazing life was. Life was a miracle. And all they ever did was kill each other.
They were unworthy of their lives.
Ultron didn't feel anything as he was obliterated to nothing.
His last thought was what bitter irony it was that his vision is what ended up destroying him.
AN: I didn't realize the irony of that until I wrote this. And then I was just like: O_O
And come on, it can't just be me who felt like Ultron actually seemed to care about Pietro and Wanda, right?