Part 4
The Wolf in the Night
Astlyr lit a candle on the desk, blinking in the small, but insistent flame. She looked about herself. The shadows in Solas' study stretched around her. She could just make out the artfully painted walls. She often wondered if the scholarly elf had commissioned the work. She doubted he had done them himself, but perhaps... She had never thought him particularly artistic. She lifted the candle, squinting. Qunari had superior night vision, but the room had only one door which led to the outside, and no windows. The darkness was complete without her candle. She had already barked her shin on the desk leg when she had first entered the room.
She sighed, wishing she could see her friend, bent over his work for some late night studying. If ever there was a time to have an expert on the Fade and elves it was now, and he was gone. Her mind strayed to the young man in the infirmary below her. Had he really spoken with that voice she knew, or had she imagined it? The more time went by the more she thought her imagination must have got the better of her. She sighed, glancing over the abandoned papers on his desk, which had been riffled through by the spymaster's people in their effort to learn where Solas had gone.
She moved back to her study of the paintings. Near the floor at the back of the room she found what she was looking for. There were many wolves depicted the on the walls, but most were large and prominent. She sought out a small, black wolf, almost obscured by the much larger figure of a silver moon. She scrutinized the painted canine. It had blue eyes, like the one in her dream, but it seemed different as well. More vicious. Its fangs were bared. Still, she reached out her hand to it, touching its painted nose with her fingertip. Nothing happened. She clicked her tongue at her own ridiculousness and sat back on her heels.
"Can't sleep?"
She turned at the soft voice in the doorway. It was Cullen. He leaned on the door-frame, watching her with a passive expression. She shrugged. "No. I keep trying to fall asleep and seeing wolves as soon as I close my eyes."
"Normal people count sheep."
"Sheep eh? I should try that," she chuckled. "Why are you up?" she rose from her crouch and crossed to sit against the desk (Solas' chair was much too small for her).
"The arm's keeping me awake," he admitted, gesturing to the sling.
"The healers can give you something for the pain, you know," she pointed out.
"I don't want it," he waved away her concern with his good hand. "This kind of pain is what I prefer. It blocks out the other." He didn't need to elaborate. She knew well his struggle with lyrium and his firm decision to stop taking it. She knew it caused him daily discomfort.
Astlyr sighed and tilted her head back, looking up into the rafters where a pair of swallows had found their way in and had built a winter nest. She finally let her green eyes meet Cullen's gaze again. "Can I admit something to you?"
"Of course," he smiled, stepping further into the room.
"I have no idea what I'm doing here. I'm leading with hunches. I'm telling people to trust me without trusting myself to make the right call," she fixed him with a baleful eye, "why am I still in charge?" Cullen hesitated, as if weighing his answer. She filled in for him. "It's because of this, isn't it?" she held up her bare hand so he could see the anchor mark in the flickering light. "Because I sealed the rift and now everyone thinks I'm a hero, and heroes lead. But they're wrong."
"You do a fine job," Cullen put in, his voice firm. "You're a bit...untried at being a leader when you're not fighting undead or demons, but everyone has to learn. And you're not alone, you know," Cullen pointed out. "Cas and I are still here, willing and able to help with our mountains of experience with shouting at people."
Astlyr couldn't help but chuckle. "That's true," her face fell into seriousness again. "Cullen, will you make a deal with me like you have with Cassandra?"
"What do you mean?" the warrior tilted his head.
"If I do something truly stupid, or something that you feel puts people in too much danger, you take me right out of that situation. You take over, no questions asked. Will you do that for me?"
Cullen gave her words a few moments of thought, his expression serious. "Alright. I doubt it will ever happen, but if it does, I'll take charge. Or at least try," he looked her up and down. She stood at least a head taller than he, and was quite muscular. He shook his head in obvious admiration, "Well, at least you make an impressive figurehead."
"Thanks," she smirked. Cullen winced, holding his wounded arm. "You're sure you wouldn't like a healer?" she asked, touching his other shoulder gently.
"No, no. But thank you, Astlyr," he smiled thinly up at her.
Then there was a clatter and a guard appeared at the door looking frazzled. "There you are, Inquisitor! Someone said they saw you heading this way, but you are hard to find for someone so..." the guard caught herself.
"Big?" Astlyr filled in.
"I was going to say noticeable," the woman shrugged, obviously pleased at getting away with a little cheek. "Anyway, Ma'am, you should come at once. It's your friend, Sera. She's gone a bit... more mad than usual. We didn't want to do anything without your say-so ma'am."
Astlyr hurried to follow the guard, Cullen in tow She ignored the guard's remarks about Sera's sanity. The elf may have been odd, but she was as sane as Astlyr herself. Still, most of the soldiers steered clear of the unusual woman as she was prone to mood swings and deadly baking attempts
The guard led the way down to the infirmary where an unusual standoff was in progress. Sera stood, bow fully drawn, facing off with Myfanwy across the room. The Dalish elf did not have her bow, as it had been confiscated, but she had seemingly managed to grapple a sword away from one of the baffled guards, and was pointing it at Sera. The guards stood back a bit, confused as to how to react. The mage who was with them had magic ready in her hand, but was obviously unsure of who to lob the spell at.
Cole, who had been standing behind Myfanwy, beside the bed, saw Astlyr and blinked over to her side, speaking fast with his eyes fixed on Sera, "Danger is here in our keep! Why wasn't I told? The Inquisitor should have known better...should have known. I'll kill it. I'll end the danger. Have to kill it. Have to protect us. No one else will do it. I'm afraid. Doesn't make sense. Isn't right. Doesn't fit."
"Alright. What the hell is going on?" Astlyr strode past Cole, though she touched his arm to signal her thanks for his words. She placed her impressive stature between the two elves, facing Sera.
"That thing!" Sera growled, not letting her bowstring go slack, even as she now aimed at Astlyr's ribcage. "It ain't right and it ain't safe! We need to kill it before it turns into something toothy and murders the lot of us!"
"She just marched in here and pulled a weapon on the elf in the bed," a guard explained.
"Damn right I did," Sera cut in, "Only, I'm surprised I had to. Where were you at, eh? Making smoochy faces at Iron Bull all this time? There's killing what needs doing here!"
Astlyr reached out a hand hand lowered the arrow's tip towards the floor. "Alright Sera. We're alright. It's time to calm down now."
"Calm down? Have you gone mental? Those horns of yours worked their way down to stab you in the brain? We have an honest to Maker demon just waiting for us to let our guard down, and you give it a cushy bed? D'you fluff its pillows for it? No. Not alright. Kill it and hurry."
"Sera, we don't know that it's a demon." Astlyr pointed out, moving with the elf as she tried to tilt her bow around for a clean shot.
"Of course it is! It has to be! I heard some men sayin' it were an old god, but that's bullshit ent it? You an' me, we know that elfy elf god stuff is a load of crock. So that means we got a demon right here and I am going to stick it full of arrows before it decides to wake up."
Astlyr shot a 'help me' glance towards Cullen, but he seemed as uncertain of what to do as she was. "It might be another helpful spirit, like Cole," the warrior pointed out, hopefully.
"I heard old baldly, Solas saying that Cole was the only one like that," Sera shot back.
"Good spirits are rare," Astlyr said, reaching tentatively out to try to take the bow, to no avail.
"Feel betrayed. How could she do this? Thought she was my friend, and that she knew better, but she's just as stupid as the rest." Cole's hushed voice filled the silence for a moment.
"Tell 'im to stop doing that shite!" Sera whirled, aiming her bow at Cole, who blinked as he stared down the deadly shaft.
"Sera!" A new voice joined burst powerfully into the room. Cassandra strode in, followed by the guard who had obviously run to fetch her, even as Astlyr was being sent for. The woman disarmed Sera with two practiced motions, passing the bow and arrow to the guard. "Listen now," Cassandra faced down the elf's defiant and enraged stare. "I understand that you are upset with the Inquisitor. She allowed this visitor to come into our keep. Our home. She may be endangering us all. But I know you, Sera. I have fought beside you, as you have beside Astlyr. In the end, Sera, you are going to have to decide if you trust her. We have constant guards watching this man, with mages and templars, as well as Cole. The second anything looks suspicious we will kill it. But I do not believe it is a demon. Do you trust my judgment, Sera? You have countless times on the field, why not here as well?"
"Because you're wrong," Sera snapped, her eyes fierce. "You and I both know that ain't no elven god." She turned and stared up into Astlyr's eyes with a deadly sharpness, but Astlyr's gaze in return was level. The eyes of one dealing with a dangerous horse. Calm, steady, and firm. Sera let her arms fall to her sides. She fumed, sticking out her jaw as she moved to march past Cas towards the door. "You tell me the second anythin' happens. I won't be kept out of the loop any more."
"Fair enough," the qunari nodded.
"An' you can steer clear of me," Sera pulled another arrow from her quiver and pointed it at Cole, then let the arrow fall back into place.
"I shall be here," the spirit boy said, still watching her calmly.
The guard timidly handed Sera back her bow as she stalked from the room. When the elf was gone Astlyr let her shoulders relax with a heavy sigh, running a hand through her long silver-white hair, which was loose instead of in its usual bun. "Thank you, Cas," she said, wearily. She might have been embarrassed at her failure to talk the enraged elf down, but her admiration for her human friend overshadowed it for the moment.
"Not bad," Cullen was grinning, a little like a cat.
"That was merely a stop-gap measure," the scarred woman said, shooting Astlyr a tight look. "You will have to keep an eye on that girl. She may try something like that again."
"That was a little exciting actually," one of the healers admitted, looking down, shly.
"Will this happen often?" asked Myfanwy, passing the sword she had been holding back to the annoyed looking guard she had taken it from.
"I hope not," Astlyr's shoulders slumped as she crossed the room to stare down at the figure of the young man, still motionless on the bed. His expression was restful, with no evidence of discomfort. She pursed her lips as she studied him, wishing he would just wake up so they could get this over with.
"It might," Cullen spoke. "I have a feeling this is a microcosm of what will come. The people in SkyHold and the surrounding areas have seen enough demons to be more than justified in their concern."
A few of the guards nodded knowingly and the mage gripped her staff grimly.
"Why did you lie?" Cole tilted his head towards Cassandra. "You told Sera that you didn't think it was a demon, but you lied."
"I'm not sure what it is," Cassandra admitted. "But I needed to calm her down, so I lied. Please don't tell her."
Cole gave a wan little smile, "she hates me because I can open up her pain and see what she fears. She doesn't want me to help, or make it go away. I will help her by staying away."
"Good," Cassandra folded her arms and looked satisfied.
Astlyr groaned, "It seems like no matter what happens with our guest here, things only gets worse. Maybe I'm sorry I even picked up that damn bird."
"No," Cole's voice was firm as he stood up and met her eyes. "Helping is always the right choice, even when helping is hard. You help, Astlyr. You always try."
"The lad's right," admitted Cas. "You care...a lot more than might be expected from a qunari, but the people can see that. It's why they follow you."
"Well at least I have something then, I suppose," Astlyr looked down at her hand, where the mark was ever dormant. "Caring doesn't stop me from making bad choices."
"This was not a bad choice," Myfanwy spoke. She was sitting on the edge of the bed, holding the hand of the man who had once been her brother. "My people have thought themselves abandoned for so long. Unloved by the gods we once worshiped, or worse, that those gods were dead. Now one may yet live, and we have a chance to help him. It is the greatest honor. If your Andraste appeared and asked for your help, wouldn't you do anything to aid her?"
"She's not my-" Astlyr began.
"Yes." Cullen spoke without hesitation. His eyes were steely.
Astlyr sighed again, hand on the back of her neck, "alright then. I made the decision I made, for good or ill. For now let us all get some sleep. You guards may ask for your replacements to come early. You've had a bit of an adventure tonight."
"Thank you ma'am," the guards said, smiling to one another.
She turned to Cassandra, feeling a cold sensation in her chest. Cas was a good and strong leader, something that Astlyr was not certain she could ever be. She nodded to the woman. "Thank you again."
"I am certain you would have resolved it, but I saw the opportunity to assist you, so I did," she glanced towards Cole with a half smile, "and the boy seems to think that helping is always the right answer."
"So he does," Astlyr felt a smile pull her own lips. "Cullen, I'll walk you back to your room."
He gave her a cheeky grin, "shouldn't I be walking you, my lady?"
She shook her head, chuckling, "You know I am about as far from being a lady as they get. Come with us, Cas?"
"I'll stay and oversee the guard change," Cassandra answered.
"Alright," Astlyr dipped her head again as she and Cullen walked together from the infirmary.
When they were well out of earshot in the darkened keep Cullen spoke again, "I hope you were not upset with the guards for seeking Cassandra as well as you to help."
Astlyr shook her head, glancing down at the man, "I really can't be. The guards made the right decision to bring her. I don't know if I would have talked her down."
"You would have," Cullen reassured her. "Cas just has more experience to get the job done quicker."
"You're right, of course,"Astlyr said, hesitating in front of Cullen's door. "You're alright?" she gestured towards his injured arm.
He nodded, "Yes. Thank you. All this excitement has effectively taken my mind off it."
"You're welcome," Astlyr snarked. "Good sleep, my friend."
"Good sleep to you, friend," Cullen reached up and gave her upper arm a reassuring squeeze, "you did fine."
She nodded dumbly, lips tight, as he closed his door behind him. Then, feeling low, she trudged across to her own quarters. She threw aside her fur bedclothes, fell onto her mattress and tumbled into sleep almost at once.
"The Fade. How original," she muttered, folding her arms and peering around at her green surroundings. "Are there a wolf and a dragon here tonight?"
This time she heard no distant roar of a winged beast. The silence mocked her. She bit back frustration. She hated this place where nothing made sense. She shot a look at her hand. The mark was quiet,without the hint of life. She sighed and flopped down on a rock, which was covered in a slithery sort of moss. She didn't care. She would sit here until she woke and that would be the end of it.
Then she felt something cold on her hand, where it rested in the rock. She looked down and jumped. The small, black wolf had come up silently as death and now touched her with his wet nose. Then he looked up at her and his bushy tail gave a friendly wag. In that moment he looked more like the friendly old hound she had had growing up, rather than a deadly predator. He blinked his blue eyes as though begging for a treat.
"Are you, Fen'Heral?" Astlyr asked. This time she didn't stop herself. She petted his head, right between his velvety, upright ears. The wolf wagged his tail again. "I'll take that as a yes," Astlyr decided as she stroked his fur. She had been right in her guess before. He was indeed extremely soft. "You're asleep in my world, right?"
The wolf tilted his head and made a high whimper. Then, with no ceremony, he plopped down to lay across her feet. She couldn't help but laugh aloud. Her laugh sounded strange in the Fade. Otherworldly, hardly her own. She stopped, but could not hide her continued amusement at the beast as he looked up at her. "Did you ever meet a hound named Dash?" she asked. "I think the two of you would have gotten along well." Then she frowned, "Do you plan to wake up soon?" The wolf whimpered again, nuzzling her calf with a wet nose. "No? You're causing me no small amount of trouble out there, pup," she said, wondering briefly if it was a smite-able offense to refer to the Dread Wolf as 'pup'. "I just wish I knew how to wake you up. It just so happens that the one fellow who might have been able and willing to help wandered off without so much as a goodbye." She felt a stab of sadness and anger as she thought of Solas' leaving.
The wolf butted her hand with his head. She had stopped petting as her thoughts had strayed. "Oh, I'm sorry," she smirked as the tip of the black tail thup thupped. "No," she said, as though carrying on a conversation with the beast, "Myfanwy doesn't know. I mean, if she did you would think she would have suggested it already. Wait," Astlyr snapped her fingers, and the wolf's ears pricked up and her ooked at her intensely. For a moment she was captured in the look. The feeling that she had been scrutinized that way before by someone else.
"You are not what I expected." a voice echoed distantly. She wasn't certain if she heard it, or thought it. She shook her head, the wisp of memory escaping her.
"I think I know someone who can help us," she told the wolf.
Fen'Heral wagged his tail two good beats and nuzzled her knee. She patted his ribby side, the way she had used to for Dash. The wolf, god or no, seemed to enjoy this as well. Briefly she contemplated giving him a belly rub, but decided against it. "As soon as I wake up, I'll talk to my contact. I feel certain that she'll know what to do with you and we'll soon have you awake."
Thup thup when his tail.
"I was wondering when you would come to me with this issue," the dark haired woman smiled a little wolfishly herself.
"I'm sorry, Morrigan," Asatlyr admitted, "I forget sometimes about the whole, ancient elven knowledge thing."
"One would believe it difficult to forget, considering I was able to transform into a dragon to aid your final fight against Coryphious," the yellow eyed mage pointed out as she followed Astlyr towards the infirmary, tall darkwood staff in hand.
"That was pretty unforgettable," Astlyr agreed as she held open the door for Morrigan to enter.
The guards inside snapped to attention at their Inquisitor's entrance. She motioned for them to relax, "as you were, gentlemen," she reassured them.
"So this is him? The one claiming to be an ancient elven god? A bit scrawny," the slender woman eyed the young man on the bed.
"Who is this?" Myfanwy stood up from where she had been sitting at the foot of the bed.
"The dragon lady," Cole strolled over, watching Morrigan with a mixture of interest and mistrust on his features.
"The who?" Myfanway folded her arms and looked uneasy as Morrigan leaned over her charge.
"Yes...hmmm," Morrigan stood back, hand over her lips as she seemed to consider.
Astlyr kept quiet, watching. Cole moved to stand beside her. "Why did you call her?" he asked.
"She has the knowledge of the elders. She stepped into the Well of Sorrows and gained a good deal of elven knowledge. She may be able to help us waken our friend here from his slumber."
"If this is indeed a god," Morrigan began, waving an elegant hand towards the bed, "then he is likely sleeping to regain his strength."
"Of course he is," Myfanwy said, as though this assertion was becoming a reflex.
"How long do they normally sleep?" Astlyr questioned.
"My dear, if it is a god, there is nothing normal about him. He could awaken today, or a year from now." The mage replied. She coiled a strand of magic around her fingers, then sent it slithering over the still figure. Myfanwy did not look pleased with this scrutiny, but she said nothing. "However, his body will likely die of dehydration before that."
"We have been attempting to get him to drink," a healer stepped forward. "We have been able to get some water and a little broth down him, but lady Morrigan is correct. We cannot get enough into him for him to live in this state for more than a month."
"Why did no one tell me this?" Astlyr put her fists on her hips.
The healer looked cowed, "we wanted to see if he would waken before we panicked. He's not in danger yet."
Astlyr sighed and rubbed her temples. "Alright, so we need to wake him. Do you know of anything that can do that?"
"Perhaps," Morrigan said in her soft purr of a voice. "I believe I have read of something not long ago in one of the elvhen tomes I have been studying. An item that can give strength to a slumbering god, enabling them to waken much sooner than they might have."
"You read?" Astlyr raised an eyebrow, "I thought your head was chock full of elven knowledge now."
"It doesn't work that way, my dear Inquisitor," Morrigan looked skyward as though Astlyr was slow. "I do not have the memories of generations of elves swimming around up here," she gestured to her forehead. "I am, however, able to read elvhen text that has long since lost meaning for The People. This is where I read of the item you must seek."
"Do we know where it is?" Astlyr asked. She felt energized already, barely keeping herself from bouncing on the balls of her feet. A good quest was just what she needed to get her mind off of her Skyhold failings.
"I know where it was. There is no saying if it is there still." Morrigan explained, eying the qunari with a little mirth in her eyes.
"Come, to the map room. Show me," Astlyr's green eyes were alight and her spirit already miles ahead of her feet.
"I want to go," Cole spoke up, turning to follow them.
"To the map room?" Astlyr turned, tilting her head.
"No. On the quest," the spirit clarified.
"Shouldn't you stay here. To sense him if he wakens?" Astlyr turned to face her friend.
"Must we always argue with the boy?" Morrigan sounded annoyed. "Merely order him to stay here and be done with it."
Astlyr ignored the mage, studying Cole. "I want to go with you," Cole reiterated, firmly. "I cannot read his pain," he gestured to the unconscious elf. "There is still a veil over his mind. If he wakes, the mages and guards will be able to tell well enough if he will harm them."
"You're sure?" Astlyr questioned. Truthfully she would be glad of Cole's company. He was practically her shadow since she had helped him free the spirit side of himself. He dutifully wore the amulet she and Solas had acquired for him to keep him from being controlled by those who might mean him ill. She suspected he did not want to be left out of the adventures any more than she did, but she also knew him to be responsible by nature. He would not leave if he thought his presence truly necessary.
Cole nodded in answer to her question, and his expression was firm. Morrigan heaved a dramatic sigh, but said nothing more. "Alright," Astlyr nodded. "You can come with us. While Morrigan and I are in the war room would you go speak to Cassandra, Iron Bull, Dorian and Varric. I am certain they will be eager to join us as well."
"Of course," Cole vanished before Astlyr could remind him not to startle anyone.
A few hours later found the group packing their horses and chattering amiably. Cullen stood with them looking a bit disappointed. "I wish I could go with you," he admitted when Cole looked ready to launch in to an explanation for the man's sad expression.
"Someone needs to keep Skyhold in one piece," Varric walked past, carrying several packs of food.
"Don't worry, Cullen," Astlyr smiled reassuringly. "Give your arm time to heal and you can join us on our next mission. And you know there will be a next one. We are forever running adventurous errands."
"You'd think we might have a few more people to do this sort of thing," Dorian put in as he stuffed an extra fur-lined cloak into one of his already overflowing saddlebags.
"No body does it like us," Iron Bull chuckled. His horse was an impressive animal indeed. Legs the size of small tree trunk and hooves as big as dinner plates. It dwarfed even Astlyr's intimidating mount, but it was a docile as a butterfly. Bull has once explained to Astlyr how he had tried to train the horse for war, but it would not strike out at a person, no matter what he did. Finally he gave up. He certainly couldn't afford to replace a beast of that size on a mercenary's wage.
"I'll keep an eye on our Inquisitor," Cassandra said, giving Cullen's wounded arm a 'friendly' pat. He grimaced, but managed to turn it into a long suffering smile.
"And if that god-thing wakes up and turns out to be a demon..." Astlyr began.
"Kill it immediately. I know the drill," Cullen gave her a curt nod, even though this was the third time she had mentioned it.
Cassandra patted the neck of her mount. A beautiful creature with a coat the color of fire, and a disposition in battle to match. "Don't let Sera murder him before you know one way or another."
"Right," Cullen agreed.
Astlyr felt a bit guilty for not asking the elf to accompany them, but she knew well enough how Sera would feel about this mission. Seeking out something elven and magical? Definitely not her idea of a worthwhile endeavor. "Are we ready?" she asked her people, swinging herself up into the saddle.
"We are," Cas affirmed, checking over their company with a practiced eye.
"Try not to bring home any more god-things," Cullen called as the group began to make their way out of the keep and into the mountains beyond.