I'm sitting in the hospital waiting room nervously awaiting Graces arrival. She would have taken me on the spot except she got called on an emergency run. I watch Elizabeth play in my arms as I think about all that has happened. We really have been blessed for some unknown reason. Christian has been amazing and I know he really wants to try.

I look up as I see Grace entering the waiting room. She smiles at me as she walks towards us.

"Ana I'm so happy you could make it let's take Elizabeth to a private room so that I can do an evaluation." I nod as I get up and follow her. I am so nervous I can't even speak. I pray that there is nothing wrong with my child and she is just having a difficult time catching on to things. I can help her with that but autism is a whole different story.

"Okay here we are. I have my best team in this room. I want us to wait here and watch from the window. I want to see how she does in an environment full of people that are not familiar to her.

"Okay..."I bring Elizabeth in to the room and try not to get emotional as they take her from my arms. I walk back out to find Grace smiling sadly at me. I feel slightly uncomfortable as I remember our last time together.

"Ana…I want to apologize for Carrick. He means well really he does but he was so out of line. I was so embarrassed and frankly ashamed of his behavior. Christian is clearly attached to you in ways I have never seen him before. I want you to know you guys have my full support." I smile at her and lean in for a hug. Grace really was such a sweetheart. I can see where Christian gets his sensitive side from.

"I really do care about Christian Grace. I-I want to make this work and yes I have a bad past but I'm not a bad person." I want her to know I mean no harm to her son. I can see how protective they are of him and it makes me sad to think he doesn't even realize how much love and support he already has in his life.

"Ana I know you aren't I can sense it dear. I'm just so happy that Christian is opening up to someone. When he was a teenager he seemed to be responding well to Elena but that didn't have a lasting effect." Elena? Who's Elena?

"I can promise you Grace that I won't stop helping Christian not even after I help him open up to his family more. You guys all love him so much I can see it. He needs to see it too." She gives me a teary eyed smile and turns back to look at my daughter.

"Ana the reason why I am not in there and I am here is because I don't think Elizabeth has Autism. " I look at her in shock. So what does she have?

"So... What do you think it is?" I ask as she leads me to a chair.

"Ana I promise I won't judge you but ... did you use drugs while being pregnant?" I groan out loud as she asks me this question.

"Yes … but I didn't know I was pregnant I swear! I quit cold turkey the minute I found out and trust me being pregnant and withdrawals were not easy. I was a high risk pregnancy." She looks at me sadly and I already know what she is going to say.

"Ana I've been a pediatrician for a very long time and I'd say I am very good at what I do… When I saw Elizabeth at the house I knew she didn't have autism. I think she is suffering with motor function delays. I couldn't help but notice that she moves slower than a two year old would and even speaks slowly. As you said she can't really walk yet and she barely speaks. This is because of the drugs. They have delayed her ability to move and speak. It's quite common in babies born to addict mothers." I begin to cry as she says this. So it's all my fault? I have crippled my child and now she has to deal with the consequences.

"I had no idea… Grace I love that little girl so much." She rubs my back as I break down. I just needed to know she would be okay.

"Ana honey it will take time and a lot of effort on her part but she will be just fine. She will walk and talk and even run. She will just be slower than your average child. She will be okay. I have her being tested right now and the result will let us know what level she is at. The results unfortunately won't be back for another week." I sigh heavily and nod my head. What else could we do but wait?

"Okay I'm going to go in now and get Elizabeth the test aren't that long. I hope to see you soon darling." I smile and wave as she heads back into the room. When I look at the clock I can't believe it's been almost an hour already. I stand and wait by the door. I smile when I see Elizabeth being carried out by Grace.

"M-mama!" I frown at her stutter but Grace tells me that will be the norm for someone with delayed motor skills. I sigh but smile for my daughter any way.

"Hey baby girl! Ready to head home and see Christian later tonight?!" I ask in an overly playful voice. It gets the job done and she slowly claps her hands while smiling. I thank Grace and head on my way out with Elizabeth. I see my security detail Sawyer already waiting for me by the car.

Christian insisted I have Sawyer with me at all times. I thought he was being a little over the top but I didn't want to see him mad. Plus he's done so much for us already the least I could do is have security with me if it'll make him happy.

Once we arrive at home I head up to the apartment holding a sleeping Elizabeth in my arms. I'm shocked to see Christian sitting at the table reading the mail in his hands.

"Christian? Aren't you supposed to be at work right now?" He looked up and smiled at me. He really did have a lovely smile.

"I was at work and now I'm home I figured today would be a little rough for you so I thought I'd be here when you got back from Elizabeth's appointment." I smile at that and feel my emotions catching up to me. I didn't really get to let it out at the hospital as much as I would have liked. I'm trying to stay strong for Elizabeth but really I just wanted to break down. I watch as Christian slowly takes Elizabeth from me and sits back down with her in his arms.

"So how did it go?" I look down at my lap and feel the tears coming on. Oh god Christian had a crack whore mother and now when he finds out this is all because of my drug addiction he'll be so upset.

"Uhm good news is your mother doesn't believe Elizabeth has autism. Bad news is she believe it's a motor skill malfunction." I watch as he stares at me in confusion.

"What do you mean malfunction?" I sigh as I realize things are about to get heavy.

"I mean that because of all the drugs in my system during the time of the pregnancy… I have caused Elizabeth to be born with motor function delays. Meaning she will walk run and talk just like a normal child... except she will be slower have a stutter and learn at a significantly slower pace than other children." My voice cracks as I speak. I try to swallow the lump in my throat but it's proving to be difficult. I don't want Christian to hate me and I don't want my daughter to suffer. Sometimes life just seemed so unfair.

"Oh." He whispers as he looks down at my sleeping child. Please say something. The silence on his end is killing me.