Chapter Seventeen
The trip down and through the remaining mountains was not an easy journey.
All of the packs and supplies had been lost when the goblin's trap door had fallen in. The only thing the Company had left were the clothes on their backs and the weapons that were strapped around their waists.
At night, the Company would pitch camp on a small ledge somewhere on the mountain, Gloin would light a fire, and they would all sit around it, huddling together for warmth.
Sleep was a rare pass time. Most of the Company were to afraid to go to sleep, fearing if they closed their eyes for too long, the warg pack would catch up to them and over take them.
Kili and Fili had been able to capture three small mountain birds on the second night of their descent the mountain. And though it hadn't been a lot, all the dwarves welcomely excepted a little bit of meat if it meant a slightly fuller stomach. Arirua had been the only one who turned down the food.
The first night around the fire had been awkward and almost completely silent except for the occasional whispers between some of the dwarves. It continued on this way until Arirua stood up and said,
"I know you want to ask, so ask your questions."
It was Dwalin who spoke up first.
"Was he telling the truth? Are you really a star?"
"Yes." Arirua said softly as she sat back down on the ground.
"Why didn't you tell us?" Thorin asked before anyone else could ask their questions. All eyes turned to Arirua.
"I am not sure." she answered quietly. "Perhaps because you never asked or because I never felt the need to tell. Most treat me different after they learn who and what I am. I believe that deep down, I did not want you to change your opinion of me. I am still Arirua. I am not any different than you. I am mortal. I bleed as you do. I am no different. But I knew deep down somewhere that if I told you, would have treated me differently."
"Was that your story?" Ori asked timidly. "The one you told us a few weeks ago about the fallen star, the one who was the daughter of the dragon constellation?"
"Yes that was me. Amlugon is my father."
"Is there anything else you want to tell us now?" Thorin asked. Arirua could hear the anger in his voice but could also see he was trying to control his temper. "Before we find out from someone else."
Biting her lip, Arirua gripped the sleeve of her left arm and pulled the fabric off her shoulder. She continued to pull it down until the golden design on her arm was completely visible in the light.
"This is my burn." Arirua explained. "Being sent to Middle Earth was just a small part of my punishment. Before I was thrown down from the heavens, I was branded. This is the mark of a traitor in the realm of the stars. And I now bare it."
"That's the reason for your pain!" Bombur said suddenly, putting two and two together in his mind.
"It is indeed the reason." Arirua nodded, pulling her sleeve back into place. Looking around at all the faces, Arirua felt surprise wash over her as she realized that none of the faces looking back at her were angry faces. "Are you not angry with me for no telling you?"
"I think I speak for all when I say that we are hurt you did not trust us with this information sooner," Balin said, "but we are not angry with you. You have dealt with so much anger and rage in your life time. We cannot bare to add to that amount."
For the first time since she had woken up from the vision of Elrond, Arirua allowed a true smile to cross her face. Not a forced smile or a sad smile. But a true smile.
"Will you tell us more though?" Ori asked eagerly. "Could you tell us more about your world?"
No more secrets. Arirua thought to herself. The memory of the vision from Elrond suddenly grabbed her attention, reminding her that she had yet to tell the Company of her friend's passing.
"I guess I can spare a tale or two." Arirua told him.
The rest of the night was filled with stories of Arirua's times in the realm of the stars and questions from the Company about things she would forget to tell them about.
Sadness slipped away from the star's face that night as she told her favorite memories. Together, Arirua, the dwarves, Bilbo, and Gandalf all laughed together, all worries and sadness forgotten. But when the sun rose, all the worries and sadness returned.
The second night, while the Company chewed away at the bird meat Kili and Fili had snagged, Arirua quietly told the Company about Sythralen's passing. Silence covered the group after she said that the Great Assassin was no longer living. They had all heard stories about the Great Assassin growing up, and the idea that of her dying just seemed impossible.
"She liked you all." Arirua whispered. "You may not have been able to tell, but she did. Sythralen was always so guarded and shut off from the world. But if she had disliked you, she would not have helped you escape." Arirua allowed a sad smile to cross her face as she passed over the sad and grim faces of the Company.
The star told the dwarves, the hobbit, and the wizard about the crystal coffin they had had made for the fallen warrior.
"She was so beautiful and looked so at peace."
That night Arirua was surrounded by comforting words, pats on the back, and the occasional kiss on her forehead from Kili when she had pulled away from the group after a while. As she sat next to him by the fire, she could hear the sad whispers between several of the dwarves about her and Sythralen.
Gandalf spoken to her quietly before she had sat next to Kili, asking her how she knew about her friend's passing so quickly. The star had simply told him that Lord Elrond had been in contact with her. Gandalf had simply nodded and wrapped his arm around the star's shoulder, trying to comfort her best he could.
"She's at peace now." the wizard told him.
"I know."
But the next three days, Arirua barely spoke a word to anyone. She was so amerced in memories of Sythralen and her times in Rivendell, the star barely knew what was going on around her. The young woman simply followed behind the Company down the winding trail that went down and through the mountains.
Occasionally a laugh or a small noise would come from Arirua, brought on by whatever happy memory was playing in her mind at that moment, but when the dwarves and Bilbo looked at her face, hoping to see Arirua returned to her normal self, they could see the glassy far off look still in her eyes. The dwarves mostly left her alone, giving her space to grieve, only helping her when the mountain trail would get dangerous.
On the fifth night, Arirua completely broke away from the Company's circle. As she sat in the grass and looked up at the stars, her mind drifted off to Rivendell and Sythralen. They would have had a funeral for her. They had laid her in the crystal coffin and sang songs of her courage and life. Then the close friends and family of Sythralen would stay at her coffin as the others left and once they were alone, one by one, they would all say their goodbyes.
Arirua hadn't gotten to say her goodbyes. The thought of not being able to bid her friend farewell brought tears to the star's eyes. And for the first time, she let the tears fall until they were done. And when they were done, the star just sat on her little patch of grass, staring out at nothing in particular. The moon was out and lit up the world around her, but she didn't care.
She just wanted her friend back.
Her eyes swept over the land until her eyes were suddenly drawn to a patch of white flowers.
Aeglos! Arirua thought as she looked at the flowers. They were the flowers that had planted around Sythralen's coffin.
Getting up from her place in the grass, Arirua rushed over to the patch of flowers, running her fingers over the delicate petals. Suddenly, a memory floated to her mind of Arwen telling her about how many years ago young female elves would weave flowers into their hair. Flowers that represented the one who had passed away.
Arirua quickly got up and raced over to the flowers, falling to her knees right next to them.
She quickly began running her fingers through her dirty, tangled hair, trying to get as many of the tangles out as she could. When she was satisfied with her hair, the star wove the stems of the flowers together, creating a complicated string of flowers. Weaving the chain brought on more memories of Rivendell; she remember all the times Arwen sat the star down, teaching her to weave flowers together and Sythralen coming over, interrupting them and dragging Arirua away to the training field, insisting that Arirua needed to learn how to defend herself, not how to weave flowers.
"Now you have something to do when you're overtaken by boredom." Arwen told her as she showed her how to weave the steams in and around each other. Arirua smiled at Arwen from behind a string of bright yellow flowers.
"It is indeed fun." Arirua replied sofly, staring at the stems with a determined look on her face.
"You should be working on your battle skills." Sythralen's voice came over the two young girls. "Not playing with plants, no matter how pretty they may be."
Arirua smiled at Arwen as the star passed the young elf her string of flowers as she got to her feet. "I believe that is my cue to take my leave." Arirua told Arwen. "Thank you for showing me a new skill."
Arwen smiled up at her. The star quickly turned away and followed Sythralen out the door of Arwen's room and down several hallways.
As they entered the training field, Sythralen pulled her blame from its sheath that was strapped around her waist. The sword gleamed in the sunlight that filled the training fields.
"Grab a blade." Sythralen told the star, motioning to a collect of swords that were mounted in the wall on the far side of the wall. "Let us see how much you remember from what I have taught you."
Arirua ran over to the wall which the swords were mounted on. Grabbing a long thin blade, the star returned to the center of the training field, facing Sythralen.
"Are you prepared?"
"Yes."
"Then let us begin."
The fight between them start quickly and ended quickly. Sythralen has quickly disarmed the star but she smiled.
"You have remembered much." Sythralen said as she picked the blade up from the ground. "Shall we try again?" the warrior asked the star as she passed the blade back to the pale haired girl.
"Ready." Arirua said with a smile on her face as she raised the sword up.
"Then let us begin."
Sadness washed over the star as the memory subsided, and she could feel tears beginning to well up in her eyes once again. But she quickly wiped these tears away.
Sythralen wouldn't want me to be sad.Arirua thought to herself. She would want me to move on.
"Well this is me, moving on." she whispered to herself. Behind her, she could hear the dwarves talking amongst themselves but the feeling to interact with others was gone. All that remained was sadness.
Arirua quickly wove the last few remaining flowers onto the end of the chain before she placed the end of the chain between her lips, holding it close to her hand as she turned her attention to her hair.
The star quickly began weaving flowers into her hair, wrapping the chain around her head, starting an inch away from her hair line and just kept going around her head, leaving a small about of space each strip of flowers. After she had wrapped the string of flowers around her head four times, she quickly twirled the long strands of her hair and the last of the string of flowers into a bun at the base of her head which she tied off with a piece of fabric from the bottom of her tunic.
"Those are pretty." a voice suddenly said, causing Arirua to jump. Glancing over to where the voice had come from, Arirua saw Bilbo standing above her.
"Thank you Master Baggins." Arirua said, touching the flowers as gently as she could.
"What do they mean?" Bilbo asked her as he sat down next to her. "The flowers I mean."
"They're a symbol of respect and loss." Arirua told him. "Hundreds of years ago, elven women would weave flowers into their hair after they lost someone. They would choose a flower depending on the person that passed away. The color, the flower, the size all contributed to their choice. Now they do not do it as much anymore, because it has been something that has been lost in time. But it is an art form that few still practice. Arwen taught me."
Bilbo nodded, with his head slightly cocked to the side. "Very interesting."
"Yes, it is indeed." Arirua said.
"Why white though?" Bilbo asked. "For Sythralen, I mean."
"Because white is the color that is associated with purity. White is the opposite of the darkness that Sythralen had lived in a great deal of her life." Arirua explained to him. "And there was nothing that Sythralen craved for than freedom from the darkness that followed her like her own shadow." Arirua sniffed, glancing up at the stars that were still singing tales of her lost friend.
"That is beautiful." Bilbo said, resting his hand in Arirua's shoulder.
"Thank you." Arirua whispered softly, smiling at the hobbit.
Silence settled over the two misfits of the Company as they sat staring at the world around them. The silence was broken by a sound of crying. When Bilbo looked over, he could see tears streaming down the star's face.
"Oh Bilbo!" she cried. "I...I saw her. I saw where she died! I...I saw all the bloo...blood, her body laying in her blood mixed with water!" The hobbit could see the young woman's hands shaking uncontrollably. It was in that moment that Bilbo suddenly realized all the pain and sadness that the star was holding inside of her. "And that image...it...it follows me where ever I go! I cannot get it out of my mind!"
"Oh Arirua..."
"I...I can not forget it!" Arirua cried, "I just do not want... I just..."
"Don't what Arirua?" Bilbo asked, grabbing her hand. "Don't what?"
"I...I..." Arirua whispered, trying to find the words that described how she was feeling. I...don't want to feel alone."
"But you're not alone." Bilbo told her, gently rubbing her hand. "You have me and Kili and the whole Company."
"But, without her, without Sythralen," Arirua whispered, looking up at the sky, "I feel so alone."
And all Bilbo knew to do was to hug the sobbing woman. As he put his arms around, he could feel her pulling away but he didn't let her.
"It's going to be alright." Bilbo said in a comforting voice. Behind him he could hear someone walking towards them but he didn't let go. Not until the person spoke up.
"Can I join you?" Looking up Bilbo and Arirua could see Kili standing over them. Bilbo let go of Arirua, pulled himself up, dusted himself off, and nodded to Kili.
"Why don't you keep her company for a little while." Bilbo said, rocking back and forth a little bit on his hobbit feet. "I'm going to go sit by the fire for a short while."
Kili nodded, but as Bilbo began walking away, the hobbit grabbed a hold of Kili's arm to grab his attention.
"Don't leave her alone anymore." Bilbo whispered to him. "It's not good for her."
Kili nodded, showing the hobbit that he understood; Bilbo let go of him arm and began walking back to the fire, occasionally looking back to where the pale haired woman was sitting.
The young dwarf prince squatted down and sat where the hobbit had been sitting only moments before. Arirua could feel his eyes on her but she didn't look at him. Instead, she kept staring straight ahead.
"Are you alright?" Kili asked softly.
"I...I am unsure yet." the star told him with a shaky voice. "I just...I just..." Tears were beginning to form again in her eyes and her hands began to shake again.
"Shhh." he whispered calmly. He pulled her close, and began to rock her gently. Occasionally he would kiss the top of her head.
They stayed that way for a few minutes as she cried. When the tears finally ran dry, Arirua lifted her head off the dark haired dwarf's shoulder, scooted away from him, and looked him in the eyes.
"Will I be alright?" she asked quietly, sounding so unsure.
"Yes." Kili answered softly, reaching to pull her close to him again. But this time, the star moved away from him rather than towards him. Kili frowned for a moment, but pushed aside the hurt. He knew that she was hurting far more than he was in that moment. "Would you like to return to the campfire?"
Arirua hesitated, but gave him a small nod. She got up and followed Kili back to the circle of dwarves slowly. As they walked, Kili kept looking back to make sure she was following him, and not running back to the solitude he was pulling her from. But the star followed him all the way to the circle of dwarves and sat quietly on the ground next to him, watching the flames dance around until she could keep her eyes open no longer. She gently rested her head on Kili's shoulder.
"Good night my Zinlaz." the star heard Kili whisper.
"Good night my Melda." she whispered back just as her eyes closed, allowing sleep to take hold of her, praying for a dreamless sleep.
She dreamed that night though, sven though the following morning she hardly remember anything from the dream. Except for one thing.
The star could remember hearing her name being called out in Sythralen's voice.
But the following morning, the dream was forgotten as the Company continued down and through the mountains.
A/N: HEYY LOVELY READERS! Okay, so I have two things of big news... NUMBER 1: Five days ago marked the 1 year anniversary of Starlight and Flames! I honestly can't believe that I have been doing this for 370 days now... WOW! NUMBER 2: I am only 5 comments away from 100 comments!
So, now that has been established, I wanted to thank all my lovely readers again for the wonderful year of love and support! I love you all so much! You have made my time on here an amazing time! So, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Also, MERRY (late) CHRISTMAS! And those who don't celebrate Christmas, I hope you had an amazing time doing whatever you do! :D
Now, don't forget to leave comments with questions, concerns, positive comments, negative comments. And don't forget to follow me on Facebook: RogueStarz (which I hardly ever use) and my Instagram: arirua_silverstar I post all sort of fun little pictures:D
-RogueStarz
Oh, I almost forgot, I AM in the process of figuring out another fanfic for Hobbit, but it is no way associated with Starlight & Flames! Hopefully more news on this subject will be coming soon!