Chapter Five: Untouchable Love
"Holy shit, Ness! Be careful with the force you put behind your swing, if you must slap me." Jake spit out blood and rubbed his cheek. "Damn, girl." He looked up at me with mischief in his eyes.
Then he grabbed my head and kissed me again.
Well, damn.
This time it was softer, sweeter. He's a good kisser. I'll give him that, and damn me, if it doesn't feel amazing to have his lips pressed against mine. It was almost as if we were made to kiss each other. My bottom lip slipped perfectly between his. I could've stayed like this forever; however, the moment had been ruined by my slapping him after the first kiss.
I pull away, wait a couple of seconds, and reach out to slap him again. Unfortunately, Jake catches my hand and plants a kiss in the center of my palm. Damn him. Damn him for kissing by surprise. Damn him for being a good kisser. Damn him for having fast reflexes.
Damn him for kissing me with such limited time left. Damn him for making me love him.
"Would you stop that?" he smiles and returns to kissing my hand…and wrist…and continues up my arm.
Oh, boy. Hot damn.
"How about you stop doing that!" I retort as I yank my hand back.
"I can't do that." He looks at me seriously.
"And why not? Huh, stud? You've done fine with not kissing me for quite some time now. Why can't you stop now?"
"You think I'm a stud?" Jake's eyebrows raised and his smile grew wider.
Oh give me a fucking break. Of course, he would only hear that.
"Wha-" Jake kisses me again.
GODDAMMIT! This boy was going to kill me.
Both of his palms were placed gently on my cheeks, but his hands still firmly held my head in place. Slowly, as if unsure, he parted his lips. Okay, this was getting really strange. Seth was right about me never kissing a guy before. I have no idea what I'm doing, no idea what Jake's doing. All I have to say, however, is I'm really glad Jake was my first kiss. Okay, yeah it's true he's my best friend but, dude, this kid is experienced.
Now he's running his tongue over my closed lips. I let him part my lips a few seconds later when he presses his tongue between my lips. I bring my hands to his chest planning on pushing him away, but, instead, I run them up to his hair. With my right hand, I grab a fistful of hair. My left pressed against his left shoulder blade to hug him closer.
His body felt so good against mine.
He removed his hands from my face and hugs my around my waist. I suddenly realize I'm now straddling him, and I have to stand on my knees to reach his face because he's just so damn tall.
This has got to stop, though. I can't let it go any further than a one-time kiss. I shouldn't have let it get this far. Shit. I kinda don't want to stop, but I pull away.
"Jake…" I don't get far, though. He distracts me by trailing kisses from my cheek to my ear and down my neck. Damn, this feels so good. The cool air around us had made my skin chilled to the touch, and his abnormally hot temperature made his kisses feel satisfying warm… "Jake…" I try again.
"Your...reaction…much better…than I hoped," he whispered between kisses. I could feel his smile against my skin.
Well, damn. How can I tell him this can't happen again, now? He's happier than I've seen him…ever. Period. Not gonna lie, though, I love that I make him happy…No! This has to stop or else I'm gonna convince myself to let myself fall in love with a dying man. A beautiful, sexy man. A man who's going to love me and make me happy and…oh hell, what's the problem if I fall in love with him?
He'll be dead in a couple months. Maybe less. Oh, right. That's why.
I push myself off of him and stumble a bit while trying to balance on one leg. His hands are still in midair as he looks at me, confused.
"I'm sorry. I can't, Jake," I whisper. "I'm going home."
"I'm not going to let you walk. I'll drive you," he replies while not making eye contact. He's obviously disappointed, but bless him for not being angry and still trying to take care of me
"It's okay. I'll ask Sam for a ride" I walk inside, and, well, let's just say my life officially sucks. Seth was standing against the counter with his arms crossed. How much did he know about what happened outside?
"Not going there, eh?"
"Don't start, Seth, please."
I drag myself away from Jake and into the other room, knowing I'm going to look a little disoriented. They all look up expectantly. Like I'm gonna tell these shitheads anything. I don't care to be mocked right now.
"Sam, would you mind giving me a ride home," I glance around the room, "now, please?"
"Of course," he stands up looking a little lost.
"Thanks," I turn and limp out to his car. I get into the passenger seat, and all I can think about is how I'm never going to clean up my fucked up life. Instead, I keep fucking it up more.