"My dread Lord Pippin." a filthy mushroom-orc whined, limping into the throne room. "I do not wish to disturb your majesty, but..."
"What? Just say what you have to say, and be done." Pippin snarled.
"Your mushroom-orcs are dying, my Lord."
Pippin laughed. "Dying? They seemed fine yesterday, when I had a look at them."
"It was sudden, my Lord." whimpered the mushroom-orc, swaying on his feet. "Many have died this morning. Many more are on the brink of death."
"What caused this?" Pippin asked.
"We don't know!" the mushroom-orc wailed. "We know nothing!"
That's for sure. Pippin thought.
"Help us, Lord Pippin! Or your mushroom farm will never be able to operate."
"I'm sure it's just a passing thing." Pippin said dismissively, waving his hand. "In a few days..." Pippin stopped short as the mushroom-orc collapsed dead on the floor. The Dark Lord slowly raised an eyebrow. This was indeed strange. Pippin swept out of the throne room and down the stairs of Barad-Dur.
As he descended, he ran into Faramir, who was grinning and stuffing something into his mouth. Pippin grabbed his arm.
"What's that?"
"My Lord Pippin." murmured Faramir, bowing gravely. "I have made the most amazing discovery! Watch, my Lord." He drew from one of his pockets a typical-looking fried mushroom, and popped it into his mouth. But moments after he swallowed it, the same mushroom reappeared in his hand.
Pippin's eyes opened wide. "What trick is this?" he said in wonder.
"It's no trick, as far as I can see." Faramir laughed. "This mushroom regenerates itself, over and over, never ending! I found it today, as I was inspecting parts of the farm. The orcs have known about it for quite a while, apparently. I caught them all fighting over it. Of course, it is yours, my Lord." He handed the mushroom to Pippin.
Pippin grinned, and ate the mushroom. It reappeared in his hand, seemingly untouched. But as the Dark Lord stared at it, a sudden wave of dizziness struck him, and he swayed on his feet and clutched at the nearby wall for support. After a moment it passed, and he gave Faramir a murderous look.
"Are you trying to poison me?" Pippin roared angrily. "What is the meaning..."
"Calm yourself, my Lord." Faramir said calmly. "I apologize, for I should have warned you. The first time you consume the mushroom, there is a certain ill effect. Even the orcs I questioned experienced it. As did myself. But it will never happen after the first time."
Pippin looked at him dubiously. "If you say so." He ran back up the stairs of Barad-Dur, taking two at a time. He had completely forgotten about the mushroom-orc dilemma. For this was the best day of his life - he had an endless mushroom - all would turn out fine.