Hutch pressed his foot down heavier on the gas pedal as he made his way up the canyon road.
He wondered how far or how fast he had to go to escape the pain that laid heavy in his empty heart.
He glanced down at the speedometer as the dial read seventy miles an hour, a speed that was way too fast for the dangerously, winding road.
Instead of letting up on the gas he pressed down even harder on the pedal and the engine growled.
The road ahead started to straighten out slightly and Hutch could see a logging truck coming towards him on the other side of the narrow road.
He thought to himself, "How easy would it be to turn the steering wheel just ever so slightly...everyone would think it was an accident and all this hurt would just simply go away!"
Starsky had followed the blond's car up the canyon road, passed him by, then paused and waited at the top for Hutch's car to come into view, that's when he spotted the oncoming truck.
A few seconds later Hutch's beat-up Ford came into view from the opposite direction.
Starsky could see the Ford was traveling way too fast.
"Slow down partner!" Starsky said out loud to himself.
He noticed that Hutch's car was encroaching onto the side of the road meant for the huge truck.
"What the hell is he doing?" Starsky muttered to himself, "He's doing that on purpose!"
Starsky placed his hands on his head in frustration, he knew he had to stop what was about to happen but he hadn't a glue how he was suppose to go about doing it.
Suddenly the man in white's words came drifting back to him.
"It's when he sinks to his absolute lowest and has lost every ounce of faith that your presence will become it's most powerful."
"Oh Jesus Hutch...what are you doing buddy?" Starsky exclaimed as he noticed Hutch's car moving further and further to the other side of the road.
Starsky looked back at the logging truck and knew there was no way the truck was going to be able to swurve over any, there simple wasn't enough road.
He also could see that the truck was going way to fast to stop in time from colliding head on with Hutch.
"Well partner...I hope the man in white knows what he's talking about!" Starsky exclaimed as he slowly made his way onto the gravel roadway.
Starsky placed himself in between the two oncoming vehicles and waited.
Hutch had himself convinced that what he was about to do was the only way out.
"I'm sorry Starsk...I just hope you can forgive me!" Hutch sobbed as the tears clouded his vision.
He was certain with the size of the truck compared to his car, there was no way any harm would come to the driver, he also knew that he himself would be annihilated.
Hutch took a deep breath and said out loud, "I'm coming buddy!"
The thought of being reunited with Starsky again, was all the strength Hutch needed to press down all the way on the gas pedal.
Starsky looked up ahead at the fast moving logging truck then slowly turned his back on it so he was facing the oncoming Ford.
Hutch started to brace himself for the impact as he gripped the steering wheel tightly then brought his left hand up to wipe the moisture from his eyes.
Starsky placed his legs slightly apart in his stance and took a deep breath, as he too prepared for the collision.
By now Starsky could see the blond clearly as he sat in the driver's seat of the brown Ford.
The driver of the logging truck had begun to lay on his horn to get Hutch's attention.
Hutch was only about thirty feet away when his eye suddenly caught something standing in the roadway.
"Oh my god! Hutch cried out as he began to slam on his brakes.
Starsky squeezed his eyes shut and waited.
At the very last second, the blond quickly swurved back onto his side of the roadway and over to the berm as the truck sped by blaring it's horn loudly.
Hutch immediately put his car in park and jumped out.
The driver of the logging truck had his head out the window and was cursing obsentities at Hutch as he passed him by.
Hutch quickly scanned the area, certain his eyes had been playing tricks on him.
"Starsky!" the blond called out as he turned around in circles searching for his dark-haired friend.
Hutch then hurried over to the other side of the road and looked down over the steep embankment, fearing he'd see his friend laying there.
When he saw no one, he cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled out his partner's name again, "Starsky!"
His voice echoed throughout the canyon but no reply was heard.
"Starsk," Hutch's voice was almost a whisper, "Where are you?"
Suddenly, Hutch's legs began to shake and they started to give out underneath him.
He slowly collasped to his knees onto the side of the graveled road.
The blond placed his hands palm side down on top the stoney roadway to steady himself as he placed his face into the crook of his arm to wipe away the sweat and tears from his face.
It took Hutch several minutes to compose himself before he was finally able to pull himself up onto his feet.
Once he was upright, he took another look around him.
He then shook his head and stumbled over to his car and with a shaky hand, he opened the car door and practically fell into the front seat.
Hutch placed his forehead on the steering wheel, sobbed a few times, then took a deep breath and sat up straight in his seat.
With a trembling hand, he turned the key in the ignition, put the car in drive, then made a u-turn before heading back down the canyon road towards Bay City.
Starsky, with a huge grin on his face, watched as Hutch's car disappeared from sight.
...
The man in white was standing by the gate with Terry when Starsky rushed in.
"Did you see that?" Starsky asked in an excited state.
Yes!" Terry nodded and giggled as Starsky picked her up and spun her around.
"Well...what did you think?" Starsky asked the man in white, waiting for his approval.
"That my boy was quite impressive!" the man in white exclaimed.
"In all my years...and there have been many I might add...I've never seen anyone pull off a stunt like that in their first week...perhaps even I underestimated the strength of your bond with Kenneth!" the man in white added with a smile.
Starsky just stood there grinning from ear to ear.
"I'd say you certainly earned your place among us Son!" the man in white said proudly as he held out his hand for Starsky to shake.
"Now...if you two will excuse me," The man in white said as he placed his hand on Starsky's shoulder then walked away.
"Oh Dave I'm so proud of you!" Terry exclaimed as she hugged Starsky around the waist then kissed his cheek.
Terry noticed that Starsky was wearing a sulking expression and asked him what was wrong.
"I-I...I just can't believe he would do that Terry...Hutch is the strongest person I know...I just can't believe he'd try and take his own life like that!" Starsky replied somberly.
"I know Dave...I know," Terry said comfortingly as she rubbed his back and brushed her lips against his arm.
Just then a female voice call out from behind them.
"Excuse me Terry...could you possibly help me with one of the children?" the woman asked.
Both Terry and Starsky turned in the woman's direction.
"Of course Mary Beth!" Terry replied.
"You gonna' be okay?" Terry asked Starsky as she placed her hand on his arm.
"I'll be fine...you go ahead...I'll find you later," Starsky said with a half-hearted smile as he gave Terry a quick peck on the cheek before leaving.
Once alone, Starsky thought he'd take a walk and check out more of the scenery around him.
He began walking the inside perimeter of the gate but didn't get far when he noticed a figure standing on the outside looking in, her hands wrapped tightly around the bars that kept her from entering.
Starsky squinted his eyes then opened them widely.
"Gillian?" he said the woman name as he began to walk closer.
"I'm sorry...I wasn't doing any harm...," the woman started to say as she backed away from the gate.
When she saw the face of the man coming towards her she stopped.
"Gillian...it is you!" Starsky replied with surprise.
"Hello Starsky," Gillian replied with a smile, happy to see a friendly face.
Starsky walked closer to the woman until only a foot of space and the bars separated them.
She looked the same as Starsky remembered her with long, blonde, flowing hair and porcelain like skin, a real beauty in anyone's eye.
"How are you Starsky?" Gillian asked.
"Well...I'm here sooooo!" Starsky chuckled.
"I'm sorry...that was a dumb thing to say wasn't it?" Gillian replied with embarrassment.
"What are you doing standing out there...come inside so we can talk!" Starsky suggest as he started to make his way to the gate's opening.
"No Starsky...I cant!" Gillian exclaimed.
Starsky stopped then turned around and looked at her.
He then walked back to where he was originally standing.
"What do you mean you can't?" he questioned her.
Gillian put her head down.
"I'm not allowed in," she replied with a deep sadness in her voice.
"Not allowed in...why that's crazy!" Starsky exclaimed.
"You wait here...let me go talk to...," Starsky said as he started to walk away.
"No it's no good Starsky!" she called out to him as she grabbed his arm.
Starsky halted in his step then turned around again.
"I don't understand Gillian...why?" Starsky asked but then it suddenly dawned on him why.
"Ohhh...that," he added as he blushed.
"Yeah...ohhh that!" Gillian blushed equally.
"Okay...since this is all sorta' new to me...where do you...," Starsky began to questioned Gillian in an attempt to understand her situation.
"I'm in limbo Starsky...in between the dark and the light," Gillian answered before Starsky could finish.
"Limbo...what exactly does that mean Gillian?" Starsky asked.
"It's all about redemption Starsky...I wasn't exactly a stellar human being during my time on Earth," Gillian said regrettably.
"You did what you had to do to survive Gillian," Starsky said as he bowed his head.
"You don't believe that Starsky...I know you don't...what I did in my past life was inexcusable...selling my body to other men...I deserved what happened to me!" Gillian said bitterly through tear-filled eyes.
"That's not true Gillian...there was a lot in you that was good...Hutch wouldn't have fallen in love with you if you weren't someone special!" Starsky disagreed.
Gillian face suddenly softened at the sound of Hutch's name.
"So he did love me then?" she asked with a smile on her face as she brushed a tear from her cheek.
"He was crazy about you Gillian...you were all he ever talked about before you...," Starsky stopped in mid-sentence.
"But he never mentioned my name after that night...the night Grossman...I wasn't sure exactly how he really felt afterwards!" Gillian replied.
"He loved you with a passion I've never seen in him before Gillian...he still loves you...the reason he doesn't talk about you is because it's still too raw for him!" Starsky told her with sincerity in his voice.
Gillian pictured Hutch's face in her mind and smiled.
"I still love him so much Starsky...and now that you're no longer there by with him...I'm so worried about him!" Gillian sobbed.
"Nothing is gonna' happened to him Gillian...not if I have anything to do about it...I can guarantee you that!" Starsky said reassuringly.
Gillian smiled as she remember Hutch saying those very same words.
The woman smiled lovingly at the dark-haired man before her, she knew she could count on Starsky to keep Hutch safe.
"So about this Limbo thing?" Starsky began to ask then stopped abruptly as he looked over Gillian's shoulder.
"Whose that man behind you?" Starsky questioned Gillian as an uneasy feeling crept through him.
Gillian turned and saw the man in black standing several yards away and she froze.
The man in black stared back at her and grinned an evil grin then turned his attention to Starsky.
Starsky noticed the man's eyes when he glared at him were completely black and sinister.
"I-I have to go Starsky...hopefully we can talk again soon!" Gillian exclaimed before running off, away from him and away from the man in black.
The man in black snickered as he watched Gillian flee.
When he looked back at Starsky before turning to leave, Starsky was certain he heard an evil growl.
...
Starsky was still standing at the gate when the man in white walked up behind him and startled him when he spoke.
"It's best you stay as far away from that man as you possibly can!" the man in white warned.
"Who is he?" Starsky asked as he continued to watch the man in black until he was only a speck in the landscape.
"He's the purest evil of all evils David," the man in white replied.
"Wait a second...are you sayin' he's...?" Starsky questioned the other man.
"Yes David that's right!" was the man in white's reply.
"On a much lighter note...I see you've found one of our lost souls," the man in white said.
"Gillian...what's the deal there...she said something about redemption and being in Limbo...what was she talking about?" Starsky asked.
"Yes...that dear child is caught between...she's a tarnished soul...but there is still hope for her David...she has a tremendous amount of good in her yet...the darkside hasn't consumed her completely...there is a chance she can make it to the light!" the man in white exclaimed.
"So that's where the redemption comes in...but how can she redeem herself?" Starsky asked.
That is not a question you or I can answer David...that is something she must find out for herself!" the man in white added.
"But...perhaps somehow...you and Kenneth will have a part to play in her salvation!" the man in white implied.
Starsky just looked at the man then back in the direction from where Gillian ran off.
"Sadly though...she needs to act soon...the man in black gets closer and closer to her every day...it won't be too much longer before he's upon her...and then...her soul will be lost forever!" the man in white replied.
When Starsky looked back at the man in white he was surprised to see a tear in his eye.
"Go visit with your friend David...he'll be needing some comfort that only you can give!" the man in white said somberly.
With those words, Starsky nodded and was gone in an instant.
...
Hutch somehow managed to drive back to his aparment without incident.
His hands were still trembling when he reached for the key above the door and unlocked the lock.
He paused before entering the darkened room.
Once inside he flicked on the light switch and his eyes scanned the length of the living room.
The blond tossed his keys on the coffee table and shed his leather jacket which he then placed on the back of a nearby chair.
He walked over to the refrigerator, opened the door and pulled out a beer.
With the refrigerator door still opened, he popped the top off the beer bottle and took a swallow.
After a couple more swallows his nerves seemed to calm down ever so slightly.
He closed the refrigerator door then walked over to the bedroom and placed the bottle on the nightstand beside the bed.
Hutch thought about taking a shower then in his weary state, he decided against it as he kicked off his sneakers and sat down on the bed.
He wiped his hands across his troubled face then reached over and picked up the bottle of beer, raised it to his lips and downed it's remaining contents.
The blond then wiped his mouth and laid flat out on the bed.
He realized he had left the light on in the living room as it shone into the bedroom.
Hutch thought about getting back up to turn it off then decided he was thankful for the extra light it provided in the darkened bedroom.
As he laid there he listened to the sound of the clock ticking on the wall and the occasional drip coming from his bathroom faucet.
Those were the only sounds he could hear and yet he still felt as if there were something else there.
"You're here aren't you?" Hutch, with his arm draped across his pounding head, called out in the semi-darkened room.
Starsky jerked upright in the chair where he sat in the corner.
"I know you're here...I can smell your cheap after-shave!" Hutch added jokingly.
Starsky smiled but remained still.
"That was some stunt I pulled today wasn't it buddy?" Hutch said as he continued to call out to his unseen partner.
"I bet you're really proud of your partner now huh?" Hutch added mornfully.
Starsky shook his head in disagreement as he stood up from the chair.
"Why won't you let me see you dammit!" Hutch cursed his friend as he sat upright on the bed and looked around the room.
"I just need to know that you're okay buddy," Hutch sighed then dropped back down onto the bed in frustration.
"I wanna be with you so bad Starsk...why did ya' have to go and stop me today...I could be with you right now!" Hutch exclaimed as he began to sob out loud.
Starsky slowly made his way over to Hutch's bedside.
"Don't say that buddy!" Starsky said to himself.
He watched as Hutch's eyes began to droop from exhaustion.
"Why did you have to leave me Starsk? Hutch asked softly as he began to drift off.
"I never left ya' Hutch...I'm right here...I'll always be here," Starsky whispered as he placed his hand on the blond's cheek and wiped away a tear with his fingers.
Both men smiled as they made contact with one another, the touch was soothing and warmed both their souls.
"Thanks partner," Hutch mumbled.
"Go to sleep Hutch...things are gonna' look a lot better in the morning pal," Starsky said softly as he ran his fingers through Hutch matted, blond hair.
Hutch smiled again and then said, "Stay a little while longer Starsk...just till I fall asleep."
Hutch barely got his last words out before his eyes closed completely and he was out like a light.
"Goodnight you big lummox...I'm not going anywhere just yet," Starsky whispered to his sleeping friend.
...
Hutch awoke the next day as the morning sunlight filtered through the bedroom window and fell upon his face.
He laid there and watched as the dust particles danced about in the beam of light that shone through the opened blinds and he smiled contently, for the first time in days.
He stretched his arms and legs as he yawned then swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up and stretched some more.
The blond made his way into the bathroom and turned on the water to the shower while he stripped off all his clothes.
As the water warmed and began to steam up the room he stepped into the tub and allowed the water to work it's magic.
The hotter it got, the better Hutch felt as the water washed away a lot of the weight that had been laying heavy on his shoulders.
After his shower, he shaved his two day old beard then combed and dried his freshly shampooed hair.
As he ran his fingers through his hair to settle it into place the phone rang out.
Hutch hurried into the living room and answered it.
It was Mrs. Starsky wanting to meet with him about the finalizations of Starsky's funeral that was to take place the following day.
Hutch agreed to meet her at her sister's and scribbled down the directions before hanging up the phone.
The blond slipped on a pair of khakis and a dark blue buttoned up shirt and then completed the outfit with a brown cordoroy jacket that he had just purchased the week before.
Hutch took one last look in the mirror, satisfied with his appearance, he grabbed his keys and headed out the door.
...
The funeral home was jammed back with family and numorous friends and co-workers, all wanting to pay their last respects to David Michael Starsky.
Hutch sat in the first row of seats with Mrs. Starsky to his right.
Nick occupied the seat on the other side of his mother and then Starsky's Aunt Rosie and Uncle Carl, Captain Dobey, Edith and Huggy filled up the remaining seats in the row.
It was a closed casket ceremony, per Jewish custom, with only a few floral arrangements scattered here and there from well-wishers who were unaware that flowers were generally not wanted at a Jewish funeral.
Mrs. Starsky felt however, the service would be a blend of traditional and Jewish cultures, so she accepted them with the utmost graditude.
The service began with the family Rabbi's offering of a Hebrew prayer.
He then went on to talk about Starsky, the good deeds he performed during his lifetime, the worthy values he lived by and how he was loved and respected by many.
As the Rabbi talked, Hutch sad with his head bowed and his eyes closed, looking up only occasionally to view the casket or to wipe a fallen tear.
He also found himself, from time to time, glancing over at Mrs. Starsky and he noticed how proud she looked as the Rabbi talked about her son.
He was thankful he was seated next to Starsky's mother for he was amazed how strong she was being under the circumstances which made him truly love and admire the woman more than ever.
The next prayer recited by the Rabbi was the twenty third Psalm.
When he finished reciting the prayer he went on to say, "Let us always keep in mind...God..the Divine Shepherd...watches over his flock. We the members of the flock...may sometimes...in our despair...doubt the justice of the Shepherd...we may not understand his ways...we may even ask why...but we are confident that he is indeed concerned with our welfare."
Hutch felt as if the Rabbi's last words were meant for him.
Yesterday, when he was at Starsky's Aunt's house discussing the service arrangements, he had asked the Rabbi how could God allow the life of someone as good and kind-hearted as Starsky be taken.
The blond really wasn't satisfied with the Rabbi's answer, which mainly consisted of how we should all treasure our loved ones while they are with us and how our loved ones ascend to the mountains to be with God on their passing and how those left behind earn a wise heart for being graced by the dearly departed's presence while here on Earth.
"Yeah...I get all that Rabbi Lescowitz...but my question was why?" Hutch thought back to yesterday as he shook his head, unaware that he had done so.
Mrs. Starsky noticed the head shake and placed her hand atop Hutch's and squeezed it gently.
Hutch forced a smile as he welcomed her touch but how he wished he could have had just an ounce of her strength.
The Rabbi then finished with a prayer asking that "God shelter David Michael Starsky's soul on the wings of his divine presence...Amen"
"Amen!" the mourners repeated, including Hutch.
The Rabbi then proceeded on to the eulogy asking those seated if they cared to speak and pay their respects.
Starsky's Uncle was the first to speak, then Huggy who was followed by Captain Dobey.
Dobey's hands trembled as he read from the paper he held in his hand that contained his chosen words.
"First of all...myself and my family would like to offer our sincere condolences to Mrs. Starsky and all other family members of David. Many of you will speak today about David and his fine attributes he had as a friend or loved one...I however would like to take this time to speak about his work conduct. He was one of the finest and most deticated officers I had the priviledge to have under my command. His loyalty was endless...his courage abundant. It didn't matter if he was helping a little elderly lady across the street or apprehending an armed fellon...he took pride in his work and he never once let myself...the department or his partner down." Dobey spoke proudly of the fallen detective.
"I remember the very first day he joined my department...I even remember the very clothes he was wearing...he had on this crazy, white, woven sweater and these incredibly, grungy bluejeans...and I thought man...this kid is going to be a real character...turns out I was right!" Dobey said with a chuckle as he shook his head.
His words caused laughter throughout the funeral home.
"Boy he was head-strong too...I had to place him with five different partners before we found the perfect fit...officer Ken Hutchinson," Dobey motioned over to Hutch.
Hutch forced another smile as he felt hundred's of eyes upon him.
"But let me tell you...once the two of them paired up it was like dynamite going off...never before have I witnessed such amazing teamwork...how they could read each other's minds without saying a word...the uncanny way how they knew what the other was thinking or feeling without so much as a whisper...that unspoken bound carried over into their work...leading to the most suscessful arrest record the department has to this date!" Dobey continued.
As Hutch sat there listening to his superior's words his thoughts drifted back to the first day he was assigned to the department and partnered with Starsky.
He remembered standing outside the precinct when this flashy, red car came peeling into the parking lot and a cocky, curly-haired individual jumped out.
Hutch remembered looking at the driver with a sense of wonder and slight distaste, only to find out a few minutes later that he was to be his partner.
That was the very same moment Hutch began his love-hate relationship with the striped tomato as he so lovingly called it.
Hutch never really hated Starsky's Torino, because his partner loved the car so much, secretly Hutch loved it too and when he found out that Starsky's mother was giving it to him, under much protest from Nick, he realized he loved it even more.
Hutch smiled and closed his eyes at the thought of being the owner of Starsky's most cherished possession.
The blond was brough back to the present by the laughter that filled the room.
"Now...David's daily police reports...they were another story...he'd always return his daily reports three or four days later...and they always contain some slightly overly embellished lines like...my partner and I glided serendipedly...which by the way was almost always spelt wrong...down the widened, spiral staircase...our feet practically dancing on air as we race to nab the perps who were making their getaway in a souped up, four on the floor, mettalic, midnight blue, vision in my dreams roadster!" Dobey lovingly made fun of his deceased detective.
This caused another round of laughter throughout the room.
Hutch even felt the need to chuckle himself.
Dobey finished up by once again offering his condolences and for thanking everyone who came to the days services.
Nick went up to speak next, followed by several of Starsky's fellow officers.
When it finally came for Hutch to speak he was trembling uncontrollably and wondered if he'd be able to go through with it.
Mrs. Starsky smiled and squeezed his hand and that was all that Hutch needed.
The blond's knees knocked together as he got up and walked up to the front of the room.
All eyes were upon him as he walked over to his left and retrieved a wooden stool then his beloved guitar that sat sight unseen behind a nearby chair.
Hutch didn't say a word as he placed the stool at the foot of Starsky's casket and sat down with his guitar resting in his lap.
He looked over at the plain wooden casket then down at his guitar and began to strum the cords.
After several nervous mistakes he stopped and said, "I-I'm sorry...this is really hard for me."
He then took a deep breath and began again.
"If you could see me now, the one who said he'd rather roam, the one who said he'd rather be alone, if you could only see me now...If I could hold you now, just for a moment if I could make you mine, just for a while turn back the hands of time, if I could only hold you now..."
Hutch paused to gather strength to continue and to brush back the tears from his cheeks.
"I've been too long in the wind, too long in the rain, taking any comfort that I can...looking back and longing for the freedom from my chains, lying in your loving arms again...If you could hear me now..."
It was at that moment that Starsky chose to enter through the funeral home's doors.
He was in awe at the amount of people who came to offer their respects but he was more in awe of the sweet-sounding voice he heard before he entered.
Starsky's heart swelled when he saw the blond at the front.
Hutch's voice began to falter, so he stop then attempted to start again.
"Singing s-s-somewhere through the lonely nights, dreaming of the arms that held me tight, if y-y-you could only hear m-me now..."
Starsky walked up the left side of the room, stopped and looked at his casket for a moment then continued on over to the blond.
He noticed Hutch was beginning to stutter nervously so he placed a calming hand on his friend's shoulder.
Hutch instantly took in a deep breath, then closed in eyes and smiled as a tear fell from his cheek.
With his new-found strength he contined on as Starsky chimed in and began to sing along.
"I've been too long in the wind, too long in the rain, taking any comfort that I can, looking back and longing for the freedom from my chains, lying in your loving arms again."
The two of them finished in perfect harmony.
The blond smiled as he took in another deep breath and sobbed, "Thank you partner...I couldn't have done it without ya'"