The disclaimers have become far too silly. Stop this nonsense at once, acknowledge that I don't own any TV show, let alone one as amazing as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and remember that under fair use and parody laws, I am allowed to use the characters so long as I don't profit from them. So no sending me money.

And now for something completely different…

Oz shook his head as he woke up, trying to piece the previous night together. It wasn't a strange blur of sounds and smells like when he Changed, more like a movie with the middle reels missing. He frowned (slightly). He hated missing character development, even if the denouement was more exciting. And hearing about it wasn't the same. It lacked emotional depth. But such is life. Shrugging his shoulders, he swung his legs off the cot, and dropped to the floor to meditate. His control was getting better, but perfection was for the Buddha. Although Oz worried that if he ever did attain Nirvana, he'd be killed in the street by a devout monk. And then took comfort in the fact that this worry stopped him from completely letting go.

Having breakfast with a crowd was strange to him. Especially a crowd consisting of two Summers women and Willow. His parents, when he saw them in the mornings, were quiet, in a hung-over or philosophical way. Hard to tell, really. But here, it was like a melody. Willow was the soprano verses, carrying the tune, interwoven with Joyce's pleasing alto providing stability to the piece, and Buffy's somewhat muzzy mezzo interjecting a slower pace on the hummingbird-quick soprano. This changed as the blonde absorbed coffee and pancakes in equal measures, increasing the tempo, building to a crescendo, and then trailing off as the three women looked at him for response.

"Good thing you found what you needed in the archives before I conked out."

His contribution to the conversation satisfied, he let his mind wander as he refused coffee. As part of his meditation, he'd cut out caffeine, alcohol, tobacco, cannabis and rutabagas from his life. He'd considered removing refined sugars, but a doughnut a day keeps the wolf at bay.

He nodded thanks for breakfast as he grabbed his bag and walked to his van, left parked in the drive by Willow. He was glad that she'd paid attention during the driving lessons, and not just the reward sessions that came after them.

School was strange today. Not just the subdued feelings from the students. Joyce hadn't wanted to let them see the paper this morning, but she couldn't keep the fact that there were over two dozen fatalities last night as a result of the candy. It could have been much worse, he knew, particularly if the Scoobies hadn't countered the spell so quickly. He'd have to make sure they understood how amazing it was that they saved so many people, rather than bemoan the fact that more than a score died. It was tragic, but so was any given night on the Hellmouth. It wasn't that they failed, but that someone else succeeded. Oz wondered what they succeeded at for a moment, and then refocused his train of thought.

Xander.

That's what was strange. The suit-wearing Scoobie looked nervous in a goofy sort of way, like he'd been ambushed by a pillow and was expecting it to happen again. On the other hand, Faith looked relaxed and satisfied, and had more sway in her step than she did yesterday. It was obvious that…

BRRRRRRIIIIIIIINGGGGGGGGG!

The warning bell sounded, breaking the werewolf's concentration. He cleared his mind and headed to his computer science class, where his project on debunking the Turing test was waiting.

After a busy morning, Oz needed something to cut the tension in the group. They reported back to the Watchers in the library, and then he convinced them to accompany him outside, where they sat in the sun and listened to his guitar slowly weep. Without looking, he could feel the tightness ease out of his friend's shoulders, though the two brunettes kept exchanging looks behind Xander's back. And there was a strange energy between Buffy and Faith. As he shifted to a major chord, he wondered if it was some Slayer thing, or if his senses were going haywire. While the wolf understood the wolf's senses completely, he lacked that understanding, and wasn't certain if things he picked up on with them were real, or just mis-interpretations of data.

Regardless, he would file it away to see if he understood later.

As he played, he listened to the group. Having found the Von Hauptman family was reduced to nothing but a crypt, the location of which was in the archives they raided yesterday, the plan was to go in force as soon as school was out, leaving Xander behind at Revello drive because he was still injured.

The self-described doughnut boy protested this action, though in vain as the force of two puppy-dog stares, one cold glare and a…sultry raised eyebrow? Really? Well, if it works it works, because he looked away and agreed with a huff.

Still not sure what's going on with the sultry raised eyebrow. And it was definitely sultry. If there's one thing a musician knows, it's…

Are those honey-glazed crullers? Oz smiled (though it may take a micrometer to prove it) and helped himself.

There was something fundamentally strange about being in a Sunnydale graveyard while the sun was up. The amount of time they had all spent skulking around, looking for fledglings, and fighting under the starlight made walking past graves in daylight feel almost surreal. But at least it stopped vampire attacks. Not sure how it would help against demons and crazy ex-Watchers, but Oz always tried to look at both sides of an issue. The team was well armed, regardless. Buffy was in the lead, armored up and carrying a sword and a stake, with Willow a few steps behind with a crossbow, giving directions. Oz followed his girlfriend, also wearing his armor and carrying his favorite axe, maintaining a hold on his meditation in case of a fight, and Giles was right behind him, sword at his side and crossbow readied. Cordelia, Marston and Faith brought up the rear, the socialite and the Watcher armed with their uniquely loaded paintball guns, and Marston carrying a scary mace, and Faith watched their back with her sword, wishing that her armor wasn't going to take another three to five weeks to finish.

Philosophy and music fell by the wayside when Oz was using his meditation to try and control the wolf. It was like jumping off a building wearing a jet pack: you knew what your goal was, and had a vague idea of what to do, but there were no instructions, and if you don't figure it out in time, someone could die. He didn't really like it, because he had to lose control and try to ride the wolf, steering it like a bucking bronco. But at least he didn't lose his abilities to make metaphors.

Willow navigated them to the Von Hauptman crypt, a large mausoleum, overgrown with ivy, that radiated a strange menace even in the afternoon sunshine. Buffy tried the door, and finding it locked, performed a kick and rolled through the now open door. Oz was only a step behind her, axe at the ready, and saw…Buffy standing in a dusty crypt. He stepped outside with Cordelia and kept watch as the others ransacked the place. After ten minutes of banging around, they heard Willow's "Aha!", and the group of them came back out with a large wrapped bundle. Before either of the sentries could speak, a low, menacing voice called out:

"Give me the Glove!"

Heads turned as they saw the hulking figure of Lagos stride out of the trees, the burn scars from their last encounter still vivid a week later. He was clad in ancient, yet heavy armor, and carried a massive shield in his left hand to compliment the deadly blade in his right.

"Faith, Oz, go left!"

Buffy didn't hesitate as she broke right and threw a low shot with her sword, trying to catch the demon's leg below his shield, counting on her friends to keep his sword busy. She regretted her move instantly, as his massive blade buried itself in the ground, inches from her, and her attack just bounced of his armor. Giles' arrow bounced off the demon's breastplate, and neither Oz nor Faith managed to do more than scratch the armor.

Cordelia let loose with a round of paintballs, trying to hit the massive creature's head, but he seemed content to ignore the holy water rounds, barely irritated by them. Willow and Marston were conferring, trying to figure out a spell to use, but the three warriors on the front-line were hard pressed to keep up.

Oz rolled back, unable to continue his meditation, and tried not to collapse. He saw both Slayers managing to stay ahead of the demon, but neither seemed to be able to make an impact. As his mind cleared, he hefted his axe and lobbed it to the blond.

"Buffy! Back of his knee!"

Dropping her sword, Buffy snatched the axe from the air, and rolled between Lagos' legs. Faith charged in, throwing shots at his head while Buffy steadied herself and used the heavier blade of the axe to cleave into the weak point in the armor.

Lagos bellowed in pain and collapsed, dropping his guard enough for Faith to skewer his eyeball, and the rest of his head as well. She kicked him off her sword and he fell over, dead.

Panting from exertion, Faith nodded to the sprawled musician. "Nice call, Wolfie."

Oz was about to reply when the soft 'ka-click' of the safety being removed from a firearm caught everyone's attention. A blond of middle years stepped forward, swinging her rifle to cover the Slayers. Everyone froze as Gwendolyn Post, the renegade Watcher they'd been warned of, looked at Willow and the bundle at her feet.

"I honestly didn't think you could kill Lagos after he'd strapped on all that armor. Well done, top marks all around. However, I'll still be taking the Glove. Now."

Marston looked at her, puzzled, but made no move for the Glove. "I would have expected you to be throwing spells around, not bullets. Where did you get a Kalashnikov, anyhow?"

Raising an eyebrow, she sneered at him. "Spells when outnumbered this badly? Not likely. When in Rome and all that rot. As to where, this is America. Land of opportunity. And people who will sell anything for a price. Now toss me the Glove or I'll take it from your corpses."

Raising his hands in surrender, Marston slowly reached down picked up the bundle. He walked a few feet closer, and tossed the whole thing at her. She dropped the gun as she made the catch, and then went down under the fury of two Slayer-strength flying tackles.

"Should've stuck with spells. Stupid bint."

Rather than contacting the Watcher's Council to have Ms. Post immediately extradited, the turned her and her illegally purchased firearm over to the police. When it turned out that she had entered the country without a passport, the whole thing was handed over to the State department, and a tip-off to the Council would have them waiting to pick her up when she was shipped back to London. All without a single poncy, annoying, bureaucratic Watcher having to step within several thousand miles of California.

Back at Revello Drive, Willow and the Watchers were preparing the Living Flame to destroy the Glove, while everyone else was getting food together or relaxing after an exhausting fight.

Xander crashed down on the couch next to Oz, and figured that the werewolf could handle a little ribbing.

"I hear that someone ran out of gas for their meditation half-way through a fight. What's the matter, can't go the distance?"

Oz raised an eyebrow, and with the lightest of smiles on his face waited until Xander had taken a mouthful of soda before responding.

"Was last night the first time you slept with Faith?"

Xander sprayed soda all over the window.

AN: I felt bad for not writing more with Oz, so he got a chapter mostly from his point of view.

Also, I'm now typing for dogbertcarroll, which is actually increasing my productivity. Go check his stuff out, he is one of my favorite authors on this site, and one of the main reasons I started writing this story.

"If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him" is part of a Zen koan, and meditating upon koans is supposed to help one achieve enlightenment, and attain Nirvana. However, as has been previously stated, Oz has a noted preference for Black Sabbath, so that won't be an issue.