Words count: 2,904
Rate: T
Warning: typo(s), grammar error(s), possibly OOC, alternate timeline, possible BL/shonen-ai
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Disclaimer :
Detective Conan and Magic Kaito fully belong to Aoyama Gosho
This story belong to reiei
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Now, let the story begins…
o.O.O.o.o.O.O.o
Chapter 15
- 15th Smile –
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
"Go on. Just let out what you want me to know. I'll listen to you."
And Shinichi begins his story.
"Few days ago there's a robbery in Beika Bank," he begins. "There were 5 culprits, all armed. One of the employees managed to press the robbery alarm, but when the police got there the robbers had already get what they wanted and was trying to flee."
Kaito knows that this isn't the first time Shinichi has to face robbers. So when he starts his story from that incident, that means that there's something unusual with this robbery. Truthfully he himself has already heard about the incident, but with all of the things he needs to prepare for his departure and his worry for Shinichi's strange behavior, the robbery incident was the last thing on his mind. And so he lets Shinichi opens up, pouring out his story in his own pace.
"Right when they heard police siren, they took a woman as a hostage as they crept toward the car that looks like they've prepared earlier. Of course the police won't let them slipped off that easily, we tried to negotiate as we seek for the best opportunity to seize the culprit without endangering the hostage. But we… we failed. We can only watch as the bullet go thought the woman's head, how her body crumpled down right after…"
The detective shuts his eyes tight as he clenches his palms, trying to contain his emotion. Be it sadness or anger, Kaito doesn't know. He himself deepens his frowns. Seeing a life lost in front of his eyes with nothing he can do to prevent it from happening… it's a feeling Kaito familiar with. He moves a bit closer, just as a means to remind Shinichi that he's still there, listening to him.
"Of course we pursued them right away. All of the police cars deployed, with only a few left to secure the crime scene and rescue the remaining hostages. Reports from polices left there mentioned that the hostages were being gathered up in the center of the room with bound hands and foots. And that there were 3 bloodied corpses in several places. One of them was found lying behind the receptionist desk, which deduced from his position that he was the employee who presses the alarm. The other body found near the exit, most likely been shoot from trying to run away. The last body was a middle aged man, found among the gathered hostages. So from that we conclude that the group of robbers won't hesitate to shoot down anybody who dares to interfere."
Kaito can picture it all too well, and he's trying hard so that the bloodied scene won't trap him back to his own nightmare. From Shinichi's mien he can see that even the corpse-magnet-detective doesn't take delight at the gruesome scene, no matter how often he runs into it.
"Unfortunately we lost them. The car they used before was ditched on the roadside while they fled off somewhere. That was at the night when you came home and found me drunk."
Kaito just gives out a short '-oh', brain whirling to put together scattered puzzle given out by Shinichi, "Do you feel frustrated because you can't capture the robbers, or because you failed to save the hostage, Shin?"
Shinichi visibly tenses, palm clenches tighter, "…I don't know. I guess, both?"
"Why?"
Silence.
"Shin, I know that this is not your first time facing serial murderers, psychopaths, nor cold-blooded robbers. Why? What make you feel this depressed?" Kaito stares at him worriedly. He knows Shinichi's not cold hearted, that wouldn't be moved even when somebody innocent dropped dead in front of him, but he also knows that Shinichi's a professional detective; he always solves cases level headedly without involving his emotion this far.
"I… 've told you that it's something stupid, haven't I?" and he smiled, a painfully forced one, "It remind me about Ran."
Ran. Of course Kaito remembers her. He has disguised himself as that childhood friend of Shinichi many times before to fool the detective. The woman that was so important to the detective, was. Or maybe she still is. Anyway, there's this uncomfortable feelings that Shinichi brings her up after all this time.
"It reminds me of her when I saw how the hostage limped and died just like that. That's why when somebody claimed to have sighted those robbers 2 days later, I rushed to investigate."
"At that time you didn't come home?"
"Yeah. When we finally caught up to their hide out and cornered them, one of the robbers snatched the neighboring daughter who had just come home. I… I think I panicked; afraid that the same thing will happen all over again. I'm afraid of failing to save yet another innocent people, and ended up feeling that useless feeling again. So I shoot him without order."
Kaito's eyes widen, he almost doesn't believe what Shinichi has just tell – done.
"I don't quite remember what happened after that. I just remember seeing the man's bloodied body had collapsed, and the little girl that trembled in fear. That expression of her is just justified, I mean, somebody has just been shoot to death right in front of her. I hear that she's been hospitalized because of shock up until now. And it's all my fault. That women and the little girl too, just happen to be in the wrong place at the worse time. Just like Ran. She doesn't know anything, she shouldn't even be involved, I shouldn't rob her of her future like that. And I can't even forgive myself for getting her involved in my mud, letting her lose her life, just because I was so useless…"
"Shin – "
"I know. I know Ran won't blame me over what befall her. She won't hate me for failing to save her. Even in her last moment she only said that she wants me to be happy…," tears are falling down from his cheeks, but Shinichi doesn't seem to recognize that, "…still, I can't forgive myself for that."
Shinichi's sobbing, Kaito decided to cut off the remaining distance between them by wrapping his arms on the trembling shoulders, trying to give him some support, giving him warmth. Kaito knows how Shinichi feels. Well, he still can get his 'ending' better then the detective, with Aoko still alive and all. Even though his mother and Jii-chan still become victims, at least they've known the risk and danger shadowing his night job beforehand, and he's bracing himself not to take their death as 100% his fault. But Shinichi's different. That young lady doesn't even know the danger that targeting Shinichi and she lost her life because of that. Shinichi can't get his 'better ending' as he gets his.
Shinichi's still crying in silence, his shoulders still trembling, and his knuckles still clenched painfully tight. And Kaito can't bear to see him like this. Weak. Broken. Buried under piles of burden he shouldn't bear.
"Then why don't you let me take her place?"
Silence. When Shinichi finally rises up his head and stare straight at him, he gives him equally straight looks. Second later his face gradually turns red and he starts making strange expressions. That's when Kaito finally realize how misleading his words were.
"Wait – nonono, no, that's not what I mean! I didn't mean it in romantic way!"
" –then what do you mean, Bakaito?! You think you can sprout nonsense like that without causing some kind of misunderstanding?! You have even kissed me!"
"W-why do you even still remembering that?! Argh that was so embarrassing!"
Both of them still throwing spiteful nonsense before getting silence, with redden face and rushed breath.
Kaito clears his throat.
"Ok, what I mean was as somebody close to you. Somebody close enough that you can share your stories with, and seek for help. Like, I don't know, pal? Best friend? You can't continue to blame yourself over her death like this, I bet even she doesn't want to see you like this anymore. And you should stop thinking that you're useless, or else you'll really be one. Don't forget that your awfully logical brain is your one and only plus point, Shin."
"…I don't want to hear about the last sentence from you."
"But it's true, isn't it? You can't even cook aside from some extremely simple dishes. You can't sing. Your sense of humor sucks. You can't flirt. And you obviously can't do any magic tricks."
"Oh, shut up, Kaito. I don't want to be compared to you. And I CAN do something else, you know it."
Kaito laughs, "Oh, really?"
"Of course!"
"Then show me. Show me that you can put your past behind, Shinichi."
"…aa, sure."
"Good. And if this will make you feel somewhat better, I'll say it. You've helped me Shin. You've picked me up in my worst time, you've given me a chance for a new life, and you've even helped me chasing back my dream. So don't even think that you're useless."
And for the first time in this long week, Shinichi smiles, not the forced and fake smile, the real and genuine one.
"Thanks a lot, Kaito."
Kaito replied the smiles wholeheartedly.
"Yoosh, now you go to sleep. You look like zombie. Let me guess, you haven't get any decent sleep for the past few days, right?"
Shinichi doesn't want to admit that Kaito's right, but he feels lighter, and his fatigue's catching up to him.
"Yeah."
"How about I repay my debt by accompanying you there?"
"Huh? There?"
"Her grave, of course."
"…oh. Yeah. Of course. I'll appreciate it, sankyuu."
"No problem," Kaito says as he gets up and takes Shinichi's diner tray.
"Good night, Shinichi."
"Good night, Kaito."
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
The next day, Kaito accompanies Shinichi pilgrimages to Ran's grave with a bouquet of white lily. And of course he stays behind a few steps when Shinichi crouches down beside the tombstone of his once loved one, whispering apologizes and who know what else. He doesn't cry, even though his eyes visibly redden. All in all, to Kaito, he seems better than he was a few days ago, although, of course, his pain won't disappear overnight.
After that Kaito accompany Shinichi apologizing to his supervisor – which, of course, means that he must stay and listening to the nearly retired inspector's speech one hour full. After managing to run out of the police station without having to endure the scolding any longer, both of them stops by the hospital to visit the traumatic hostage victim.
Kaito's trying his best not to laugh at Shinichi's comical expression when the girl's parent thanking him over saving his one and only daughter instead of the predicted hatred. They said that the doctor and the psychiatrist that diagnosed her declared that she's showing positive response and should be healed in no time. Shinichi was as relived as the parent when they heard that news. The detective actually wanted to pay a visit to the shot robber's family, but they still can't be contacted up until now. Then they decided to goes home after that
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
At midnight, nightmare wakes up Shinichi abruptly. Nothing new, to be honest, it is usual occurrence to him now. What unusual is, when he's going downstairs for a glass of water, he finds the living room's lamp is still on. He finds Kaito there, watching who-know-what film casually.
"Bad dreams?"
"Aa, as always," Shincihi flopped down into the sofa aside Kaito. "You too?"
"I'm just trying to adjust my internal clock so I won't be jet lagged there."
"Hah, of course. Of course I won't believe it."
Kaito just chuckles.
Then they ended up falling asleep on the couch, and even though their back ended up sore, at least they don't have any more nightmares that night.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
In the morning – well, not really that morning, as it's already 11.00 but he and Kaito's still sprawled on the couch, with TV still turned on – he's called to the police HQ to fill in some documents on the robber incident as well as his suspension. He ended up staying until late at night giving out 'tips' on solving a serial murder case, because, of course, he's not allowed to officially join the investigation.
He comes home assuming that Kaito has already left for France, and so he go straight to bed.
"How dare him to go just like that after all the lecture on 'best friend' and all those beautiful words he forced on me a few days ago," he grumbles inwardly.
And because of that assumption, he almost gulps down his mouthwash instead of spewing it out at the next morning he catches Kaito casually walks inside the bathroom.
"What are you doing here?!" he asks with widened eyes.
"Huh? Shaving?" half-asleep Kaito answers innocently while showing Shinichi the shavers he's holding as if to make a point of his argument.
"That's not what I mean! Shouldn't you depart yesterday?!"
"Ooh. Nope. I've delayed my departure~"
"…why? How come? So, when will you depart?"
"Do you want me gone that badly, Shin?"
"That's not what I mean," Shinichi huff a heavy sigh, feeling tired with all the stupid banter so early in the morning.
"Haha. I'll go in a week. I've told my host there and he's not complaining. Actually I wanted to spend the first week there adjusting myself, but it's not all that important anyway."
"It should be important –"
"And for why, I've already told you that I'm not leaving you when you're like this."
"I'm alright."
"You're not okay. Have you decided to take it so somebody professional?"
"Don't say it as if you're going to give me a choice not to do it," Shinichi snorts.
"That means you have, huh? When?"
"Now you sound like my mother."
"Nah, I'm nothing compared to Yukiko-san. And you're not answering my question."
"Shut up. I've got an appointment tomorrow, ok? Happy now?"
"Not really. I'm hungry – Ouch! Why the hell was the kick for, Shin?!"
"Because you're making this annoying expression."
"What?! I'm not! You're the one who's annoying, Shinichi!"
"No, Bakaito. And how about you?"
"What about me?"
"Your therapy. About fire."
"Ooh, it went well. I think I might even stand up in front of a campfire without freaking out now."
"Really? That's great."
"Yeah, I think so too. No matter what, I still want to do some fire magic tricks."
"Fire magic tricks?"
"Yep! By the way, there's this one woman so talented with fire magic tricks and follow in her grandfather's footsteps. Her grandfather's last fire magic trick was a kaleidoscope made from gems, made to encourage his granddaughter back into the magic world. It moved me, really. That one was really a beautiful magic work."
"Hmm. He must be pouring out his love for the granddaughter to the kaleidoscope. Did the granddaughter came back to be a magician in the end?"
"Yeah, and she's becoming famer year by year at the time I was in prison, haha. Someday, I want to make my own fire magic that will remind me of my dear moment with my family, not becoming scared stiff and blaming myself over their death…"
"Don't worry, you will. You're stubborn enough after all."
"I don't want to hear that from somebody more stubborn than me."
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Kaito dare says that Shinichi's mood has improved quite greatly a week after their little quarrel. Shinichi's suspension is until next week, so they're only relaxing at home or eating out somewhere. At least he won't worry that much over leaving Shinichi alone now.
When Kaito's departure's day is finally here, Shinichi, Aoko, her daughter Akane, and Akako sends him off. The magician even manages to give each of them a flower, which Shinichi throws right back at him with fuming face.
He leaves with a promise to come back after fulfilling his dream – and to stay in touch with them regularly. He's not crying, of course, why should he cry at the beginning of his journey to chase after his dream?
"Take care, don't make any other people pissed off at you," is Shinichi's advice which Kaito laughed off.
"That should be my line!"
As the plane fly higher and higher into the clouds, Kaito shifts his gaze out of his tiny window, to the blue sky, mass of white clouds and all of the scenery behind. He may once lose everything he holds dear to him, but now he gets his 'world' back. He has his dream, his goals, his friends, and a place he can call home. He'll keep trying to be a better man, give a meaning to his existence. Then he'll come home with a big smile and proud looks from his important ones. And until that day comes, he will fight.
.
.
.
-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-
Last chapter~ Thank you to those who're still reading this translation up until now. There'll be one last update: the epilogue. Thanks for being patient with my messy translation. XD
Dewa, until next time :D