Miss Granger,
I would like to apologise for my irrational and inappropriate behaviour this evening. It was unprofessional and, I assure you, it will not be repeated. I hope you will forget the incident as soon as possible.
SS
There. That would have to do. Severus sat there a while, a frown etched deep on his face. Finally he sighed deeply, stood up and tied the scroll to the small owl he kept in his chambers. He didn't know what to do, what to think. The kiss had been incredible, perfect. He had never felt such passion in his life. He had not been treated with such passion ever before. And to think he was destroying all that by sending the stupid letter. But he had to, it was imperative that he stop what was going on immediately. She was his student. She was twenty years younger than him. He would be taking advantage of her youth, her innocence. Merlin, what would Dumbledore think if he were still alive and knew of his deeply improper feelings for a student?
Severus tried to distract himself from his dark thoughts. He sat at his desk with a pile of essays he had to mark, but his mind kept wondering to Hermione - her first name in his mind felt perfectly natural to him. When did that happen? He knew that she returned his feelings, whatever those were exactly, to some extent at least. Her eyes had been so full of heat when they had stared at each other in the dining hall, and she had been oh so responsive to his kiss, to his touch. It had been his body's response to the gasp of need and want that had escaped her during the kiss that had pulled him out of his haze of arousal and intense pleasure. He had suddenly realised that he was molesting a student in public, where anyone could have seen them. Not only that, but he had her pressed, almost violently, against a wall, and he had been so close to losing complete control, Merlin knew what he would have done if had not stopped...
He groaned, once again painfully aroused. He had to end this, he had to forget her, it was just so wrong... but, Gods, he didn't want to forget her. He had never felt this way before -not even with Lily - and didn't he deserve some kind of happiness, after all he had done for the world? But it was too late, the letter was sent. And it was for the best. He was a teacher and she was a student; there had to be a respectful distance between them.
...
Hermione laid there, the letter scrunched up in her hands. It had been a physical blow to her stomach, making her feel sick, angry and depressed, all at the same time. How could he expect her, want her, to forget the soul wrenching kiss they had shared? It had truly been earth shattering for her. She had never been kissed that way before, had never been made to feel that way before. Kissing Krum had felt new, strange and sometimes even unpleasant. Kissing Ron had felt good at first, had even caused a tingling in her stomach, but that had all stopped after the excitement of the war was over and she had realised that he wasn't what she wanted, what she needed. Kissing Severus had literally changed her world. She had been consumed with desire. She still was, she thought. She had completely forgotten her surroundings, her public surroundings. All she had known, all she had felt in that moment was him, his warmth, his body and his mouth... oh Merlin, that perfect, warm, harsh mouth of his that had driven her completely crazy with want.
And then he had sent her that letter. That cruel, cold letter that had dismissed the beautiful, heated moment they had shared as an irrational, inappropriate lapse of professionalism. How dare he? She knew he felt the same, she had seen the heat in his eyes, the same desire and longing that she knew was evident in her own. And now he had promised that the kiss would never be repeated. Never. He wanted her to forget the "incident" as soon as possible.
Well if that's what he wanted, then that's what he would get.
...
Severus felt so confused. He had woken up, after very little sleep, worried about her reaction to his letter, wondering what she would do. And he had found the answer to that: nothing. She had ignored him all through breakfast, had not glanced in his direction once. She had not looked miserable or disappointed, but had seemed decidedly cheerful, joining in with the general conversation and laughter around her.
They had passed each other in the corridor; she had not acknowledged his presence, not missing a beat in her conversation with the Weasley girl. The fact that he clearly affected her so little twisted his stomach into a tight knot. Of course he didn't watch her or acknowledge her either, but he was constantly aware of her, who she was talking to and what she was doing.
And now it was time for another potion's lesson with her. Surely she couldn't ignore him in his very classroom, could she?
Apparently she could.
...
Hermione was bent over her potion, concentrating furiously. She could feel his gaze resting on her but she refused to look up. She had successfully ignored him all day. It had been incredibly difficult: every time she had seen him, her heart had leaped and she had almost forgotten about the letter and had been so close to locking eyes with him and smiling at him again... But no. He wanted her to forget it. He had made it clear that that amazing kiss wouldn't be repeated in the future. And she was going to show him what that meant.
She was about to leave the classroom at the end of the lesson, after dropping her bottled potion on his desk without even glancing at him, when she heard his deep voice almost growling her name "Miss Granger!". Hermione whirled around, angry now.
"What?" she snapped, rudely, glaring at him, ignoring the way her heart thudded, responding to the eye contact they were making for the first time that day.
"Stop ignoring me." he demanded, snarling, glaring at her and uncharacteristically ignoring her rudeness. Something within her snapped.
"How. Dare. You." Hermione snarled, slowly making her way towards his desk. "First, you stare at me all evening. Then you kiss me. Against the wall" she added, ignoring his shocked expression. "And then you send me that letter. You told me that you would never kiss me again. You told me to forget the kiss. And so, I do what you say, and now you have the nerve to tell me to stop ignoring you?" Hermione was bright red and shaking with the anger she felt. She had closed the distance between them, her hands on his desk, leaning towards him, breathing heavily, her eyes sparking dangerously. Their faces were so close.
"Work out what you want!" she snarled. Then she whirled around and marched out of his classroom without looking back, and slammed the door behind her, secretly pleased with her exit.