Sometimes, it just needs a quick decision to end everything.
"You just can't say no, can you?"
The question keeps lingering in his head, torturing him with the very complicated form of humiliation and derisiveness.
He usually bolts up in the dead of the night, cold sweats covering his face while his body tenses and shivers in panic and fear.
They come whenever his eyes shut and his mind drifts into a light sleep.
Nightmares.
He saw Heaven burned in the flame of both angelic civil war and the invasion of demons. He saw humanity struggled in the raid of Hell's force. He saw his children and other pagan gods trying to run away from the attack of the rising dead. There are no longer barriers between the religions, only Fear remains.
But nightmares, after all, isn't the main terror of the night.
It is the old dreams that come back to him and haunt him.
The dreams that are choked, strangled, suffocated, intoxicated and poisoned so much that they are now a wrecked mess. Twisted so much that when they come to remind him about his past life, he only wants to commit suicide.
...
Sam throws him into the bed in so not a gentle way before pinning him down and ripping off his clothes. It has become a daily event that he simply stops hoping that it would stop one day. The next thing is that the King of Hell puts him on some 'imaginative' kinds of bondage then gets to penetrate him roughly, fuck him to the mattress and only stops when the poor unwilling consort becomes impossible to sit or stand up for at least a week.
Gabriel sourly looks through his memory of the past days he stayed in Hell. Now, he no longer cares what Sam would do to him. There is nothing to care about.
...
"Sam cares about you so much, Gabriel. Why can't you open your heart a little?" The fallen Angel, who is now the most well-known General of Hell, spoke to him.
Gabriel stays speechless, he doesn't want to answer that question. Since only he understands his answer to that question.
"Big brother..." Castiel continues but is interrupted by the crashing sounds of the porcelain mug thrown at the door by Gabriel.
"Shut your mouth up, Castiel!" The former Archangel growls furiously. "The day you chose to side with Dean Winchester, with Hell, you have no longer been my brother!"
Castiel flinched hard. He knows what Gabriel means. If there is anyone that was hurt worst in Heaven, then that person can only be Gabriel. Castiel has heard about Gabriel struggling to be looked as an Archangel instead of a fledgling that was kept as pet by both Michael and Lucifer. He also watched Gabriel flew away from Heaven the day Lucifer fell to Hell. And now, he is watching Gabriel suffering the betrayal of the last existing brother.
Gabriel lies back down on the bed, covering himself with the blanket, trying to hide his hurt emotions away.
"Go away Castiel. I don't want to see you." The former Archangel groans under the blanket. "And don't come back trying to convince me, I will never give up fighting."
Castiel sighs deeply and walks out, closing the door, not forgetting to lock it since Sam would be furious if Gabriel makes a successful escape.
'You love him, Gabriel.' That voice again.
Sam is on top of him, holding both his wrists above his head with one hand.
'I don't.' He retaliates at the being in his mind. 'I have never loved him and will never love him!'
'Liar...' That being smiles meaningfully at him in his mind.
Sam begins to stretch him hard, penetrating him with large, long fingers, making him moan breathlessly.
'I hate him...' Gabriel thinks, tears forming in his eyes. 'I truly hate him...'
'Stop lying to Yourself. I know you from the deepest of your heart.' That voice laughs at him.
Gabriel bites his lips to restrain himself from crying out loud. Sam is thrusting deep in him rudely while biting at his collarbone and neck, making black and blue bruises on his body.
"I like watching you this way..." The King of Hell chuckles, nibbling at his neck. "So vulnerable and pathetic."
"Fuck... Fuck you." Gabriel sobs with a choked voice, squirming to get some precious freedom.
"I think I am already doing some fucking, pet." Sam buffs before thrusting into his consort again. "And what did I tell you about language, Gabriel?"
Gabriel stays silent. He is too exhausted to put on any meaningless quarrel. All he wants now is everything comes to an end.
'You can't say no. But you don't want to say yes.' The voice continues to mock him. 'But you can't keep on staying like this forever either.'
'Shut up!' Gabriel yells mentally. 'You are not I! You don't understand!'
'Of course I do. I understand you more than you do.'
Gabriel is now in the dimension of his mind. He could see someone standing at a distance to him. That person wears the face of his vessel. Or that person is actually his vessel.
'Richard...' Gabriel rolls the name off his tongue.
The person in front of him is smirking at him with unreadable face.
'Why did you keep on mocking me? We share this body now, don't we?' Gabriel tiredly sighs, watching his vessel's owner cocking a brow.
'We are sharing it. But you are fucking messing with it. I can't tolerate that!' Richard spits at him angrily.
'It wasn't my fault... Can't you see that I am frustrated?' The Archangel sadly responds, he has hoped that there will be some sympathy coming from Richard. 'I cannot do anything...'
Richard huffs, hands putting on his hips. The human has never lost his sense of humor, even in the darkest time of their journey.
'Excuse me, your Highness!' The vessel's owner shows a snide face at the Archangel. 'You are the Messenger of God. You are the Archangel of Judgment. And now you are going to give in to the King of Hell just because you CAN'T? What has happened to the once so dickly proud Archangel I knew?'
Gabriel is stunned at the words coming from the human.
Yes, he used to be a powerful Archangel, running away from Heaven because he felt frustrated in his attempt to stop his older brothers from fighting each other. He had come down to Earth, tracking his one and only vessel down before tricking him to give his consent away. Richard, a little nice poet in a North European country, has become infuriated when the Archangel tricked him. Gabriel remembers clearly how the small but hot headed man threw his temper tantrum out, trying to regain his control over the body they shared. In the end, the poet had to admit defeat and Gabriel took control over the body.
'If I say that I am not amused to see you, the Trickster, gets tricked then that would be a lie.' Richard snorts. 'But, your situation now depresses me badly. What can I call it? Nightmares in the day? Or Daymare?'
Gabriel looks at Richard, his eyes full of sorrow and plea.
'I want this to end... I am too tired...' The Archangel speaks bitterly. 'You are right, I was a dick. But... I can't keep on living in this place... Keep on living like this.'
'Then, go free Yourself.' Richard speaks without hesitation, making Gabriel confused.
They stare at each other for another while with Gabriel trying to figure out what the human soul means.
A flash of silver light passes his mind.
The demonic maids found him in a corner of the bathroom. His body laying prone on the side of the large bathtub, burnt wings marked the floor with grey ashes. They found a piece of his broken Archangel Blade stuck deeply in his chest, the place where his heart lies.
Sam finds his note on the nightstand just a while after the demonic maids found him. The Boy King opens the note to read, then quickly collapses to the floor next to the bed.
"Dear Sam Moose,
I have taken quite a long time to consider before giving my story an end. You know, there are many things that we cannot obtain with force. I have learn that from my experience when I struck on you and your brother. Sammich, I have never stopped loving you. But you have gone too far into the Darkness of Hell that you have become anything, but not yourself. I can't find the Moose Man I used to love anywhere in you now and that really kills me pieces by pieces. It's not the physical pain that hurt me, it is the mentally pain. And I have gone through enough mentally pain, Sammy. I am too frustrated and too tired.
I need a rest. Because my life has become something I can call as Daymare. Nightmares in the Day. No matter do I sleep or wake, there is nightmare only.
I hope that I was right. That there is still a moose in you, Sam. Even if that hope is so vague, I still keep on hoping.
Gabriel."
Lucifer and Michael are thrashing violently in the Cage, their wings flapping furiously, making the Cage tremble hard, their powers seeping out, putting Hell in continuous change of temperature between freezing coldness and melting heat. The legendary children of Loki also descend to Hell. Fenrir clams his jaws onto the hellhounds, tearing them apart while Djormundgan spills the deadly poison all over the land of Hell. Hel rides Sleipnir around the border of the main land, absorbing any careless demon's essence.
Dean is up to the eyes with the task of defending the attacks, which come from almost every directions. What really matters is that The King of Hell has turned into an ignoramus to whatever happening.
Sam hasn't come out of his hall after Gabriel's death. He fell into a Limbo of emotion, he couldn't feel anything, even the most basic feeling of demons, hatred. His head spins and spins as memory comes into many different forms, but none of those is comfortable. Gabriel's suicide really rings a bell in his head, not a bell though, more like a siren, to wake him up from his seem-to-be forever dreams.
Whose dream is strangled now?
One day, the Cage is sprung open by a powerful celestial being, releasing Lucifer and Michael out so they can start the Apocalypse.
One day, the giant snake of World Jormundgan releases his tail by the command of a pagan God, starting the Ragnarok.
One day, the Judgment Garrison of the Lord following an Archangel of Judgment descends to Hell, starting their battle to cleanse the sins out of existence.
One day, Sam Winchester drops to his knees in defeat before the ArchHerald of the Lord, eyes wide open in shock, realising who is holding the Archangel Blade stabbing in his chest.
"Dad revives me to put an end to our story, Sam Winchester." The Archangel coldly speaks, staring at the King of Hell emotionlessly.
Sam bitterly smiles and looks at the Archangel right in the golden brown amber eyes.
"I know. And it will always end with a good ending."