Chapter 5: The Tale of the Hard Nut
She glided across the stage, twirling gently as her tutu ruffled from her delicate steps. Walking on the tips of her toes in the slippers, she held her arms high, in perfect form, the delicate bells of the celesta accompanying her every move. Her white costume glittered under the lighting, her face projecting utter serenity and peace. Her character was a faerie, yet the mortals idea of how a faerie should appear in a ballet apparently differed from her normal behavior.
But no matter – how exciting her life had become posing as an ordinary person! Ever since the toymaker had taken up employment with the Marzipan Court, he'd sought to find a place for her within the kingdom so he could see her more frequently.
She'd not needed the help.
She'd loved the freedom dancing gave her. In the past she simply contented herself with watching, often sneaking her way into mortal ballet performances and soaking in their graceful beauty. But these days she'd grown tired of being ever the quiet observer. She wanted to take something for herself, just once, even if it was merely a place in a dancing troupe.
And so these dances began, her regular performances for the noble court.
And every time she performed, there were two people she counted on seeing the most.
Not the royal family – though the princess came with regularity, she barely knew them.
Nay, it was the toymaker and his nephew, now a handsome young man seeking his own place in the world he'd escaped to.
Whenever she performed this song, she imagined herself dancing amongst the stars she called her home. The constellations, fixed in the sky, granted her the ability to divine the future, herself the one that glided amongst them to find the vital clues they left for those who watched.
How long had it been since she'd seen those stars? Surely the other faeries could handle it… did they need another?
As her dance concluded, she heard that familiar ring of applause. Her face retained its mask of a ballerina's cheer… yet her careful eye noticed two missing faces.
As she walked backstage to change, she gathered her few possessions close to her – her white coat and dress, her boots and cap…
"I hope I'm not interrupting."
She almost jumped as she spied the toymaker in her dressing room, wearing his favorite purple coat. "They don't normally allow those outside the troupe to enter," she said plainly.
He smiled gently – though she detected something insincere. "Do you need something?" she pried.
He beckoned his head outside.
The toymaker's atypical silence upset her enough that she didn't even bother wiping off her stage makeup before changing into her normal clothes. Specks of glitter remained on her cheeks.
They left the performance hall, wandering into the colorful streets of the kingdom, teeming with so many mortal lives. Before she'd only occasionally gathered one at a time, as they ventured into her world, trying to grant them safety. Diving into hundreds of lives at once, like he did… how invigorating!
At this moment, though, all that she wanted to focus on was this one mortal.
Finally he stopped walking when they'd found an empty gazebo in a park. He gently led her by the hand up the steps before releasing her as he took a seat. She nestled close to his side, not wanting to part from his warmth.
"The King… wants me to build machines that kill."
So… that was it. His life bringing happiness through his creations was coming to an end.
"I tried to make him see reason… but he said the mice have gone too far. They even tricked his daughter into letting them steal from his own larder."
"I don't understand… it's just a little syrup…" To kill for that?
"He said it was more than that. They've grown too bold. The twins are calling themselves the King and Queen of Mice. They're tired of being forced into the shadows, and he's afraid they're going to overrun us."
He ran a tired hand along his forehead. Though the toymaker still had ceased to age a day since their first encounter in the snow, the weight of his burdens seemed to reveal, if only for a moment, the true weight of his long life. "A mouse King and Queen…" she repeated. She'd never heard of people like this before…
"I… I almost refused him right then! How dare he turn me to this? We had a deal, I wasn't coming to this court to build machines of war! But… now my nephew tells me he's enlisted. He's a soldier now. He wants to protect the princess, he said. Just like that… How could I possibly not do everything in my power to keep him safe?"
She found herself leaning her body against his. Mortals, she understood, yearned for the comfort of touch. Getting this close to him, she could actually feel the built up tension in his nerves, his stiff muscles constricting with the stress of his choice. The toymaker's nephew had long ago made acquaintance of Princess Pirlipat, an enigmatic, proud, yet lonely figure. It just sounded so much like the boy to take such an impulsive action. He always wanted others to be happy… he himself never showing any signs of being upset, let alone tears.
She tried to think of a solution to the toymaker's dilemma. They needed to keep the mice away from the kingdom, right? Then at once it seemed so ridiculously simple.
"… he just wants them gone, yes?"
The toymaker nodded his head. "He suggested I started arming my clockwork soldiers, build traps and…"
"Hmph, they're just mice. You don't need to go that far."
He looked into her eyes, and he bore the weight of someone who'd lost so much. "Mice… they hate cats right?"
She smiled slyly at him as the recognition of her idea spread along his face. "SPIRITS ALIVE! I'm a dunce for not even thinking of it!"
At once she found herself pulled into a tight embrace. "Ah, my Sugar Plum, I really am nothing without you! Ah, I'll get the plans drawn up tonight, we can roll them off the assembly line first thing in the morning! I think I have enough nodes to imprint them with the right commands…"
She almost hesitated before she raised her arms and tightened them around him. She'd seen others do this, but she didn't understand why until just now… when her heart beat so strongly and swiftly…
The toymaker stopped talking. He arched his eyes in surprise, but a soft smile spread along his lips. He drew his face close to hers, his sudden burst of energy dissipating. Was he truly as nervous as she was? He placed one of his hands to the side of her chin, running his fingers along her face… she started to twist his wondrously soft hair in her hands…
The second their lips touched all of her nerves vanished. Jubilation warmed her body, the excitement of his passionate touch. She knew this wasn't the place for a faerie, this just wasn't done, and somehow the taboo only made it all the more exciting. He drew her closer, his embrace unyielding, yet his lips soft.
The two of them parted, a faerie and a toymaker, now bound by something far greater than mere fate written in stars. Everything felt so different… so frightening… and so wonderful.
The only sound interrupting their blissful silence was the ticking of the clockwork heart she kept tight in her coat.
Miku stared in shock at the face of the girl looking back at her from behind the wall of crystal. "Where… where are my friends!?" she sputtered.
The girl's cruel peals of laughter only toughened Miku's resolve. "Tell me this instant! Did you do something to them!?"
The girl's laughter died off. "If I did, do you really think you're strong enough to stop me? A tough brave girl, afraid of a bunch of mice! Waving around a toy sword like a toddler!"
Miku took a few steps backwards, trying to navigate the way out… yet to her it seemed as if the crystals had closed in around her. Was this the magic Kaito was trying to warn her about?
"Aw, that's more like it… a little scaredy cat who can't do anything without her doll to stand up for her."
"Stop it!" Miku shouted, "I'm not that weak! And I will find out where Kaito and Meiko are!"
The girl had her hands curled around her hips, swaying them back and forth as she continued her taunting in a sing song voice. "Suuure you will! Little girl, so brave throwing her shoes at the King of Mice but running like a coward when she sees him in front of her!"
Behind the girl, Miku began to notice a figure in the reflection. She whirled around and found herself face to face with the Mouse King himself. "Finally, I find you cowering here!" he said, cruelty dripping from his every word, "Now what should I do with you? There's so many ways for humans to feel pain!"
'How did he get in here?! How did he find me?!'
Miku backed away from him before breaking out into a panicked run. She had to escape him, she knew she wasn't strong enough to fight one of the creatures that took away her home from her…
Kaito just stared at first, still trying to comprehend why he was looking at a human version of himself. He retracted his wooden hand as he watched a horrible smile spread on the human Kaito's face. "You really don't get it, do you? Are you just a stupid doll, or are you trying to forget?"
Kaito finally turned his head away – he didn't want to keep staring into a face like his. "I'm not trying to forget anything… once I remember everything, I'll be able to save Miku. That's all that matters."
"That's all you ever do! You give up everything you have! You don't even think about the consequences!"
Kaito saw the crystalline walls begin to glow. He pulled out his sword out of reflex, expecting a fight.
But instead of enemies appearing before him, the walls began to project the inside of a glamorous, pastel-painted castle. He started to walk along the rich carpets – at first he recognized it as the inside of Miku's toy castle, but as the halls spread out in front of him, he began to remember more and more of it from memories of his past. The true Marzipan Castle. The boy followed close behind, casually walking with his hands behind his back. "You're not even being truthful to her. You knew that castle. You know who the toymaker really is."
"NO!" Kaito shouted, "I really don't remember! I… I…"
He thought he was being truthful – after all, he couldn't lie. He was a doll, and dolls couldn't lie.
"You're lying to Miku, you're lying to your princess, and you're lying to yourself."
Kaito wandered into an interior garden. On a gilded bench sat a girl in a red gown, her hands calmly folded in her lap.
She turned to face Kaito, her brown hair pulled back behind a red and gold headband. He knew those brown eyes, he knew this girl, he was traveling with her right now.
Her lovely face pulled into a cruel scowl. "You ugly little doll, what are you doing in my presence? I thought I sent you away!"
"… he was your only friend."
"STOP IT!" Meiko shouted.
She hated even looking at the girl in the red gown – acknowledging that this person and she could be the same. "Why should I? You looked him straight in the eye and refused to tell him the truth. You're letting him live with a lie just to help you conceal your crimes."
Meiko tightened her grip on her sword. "I… I don't want to see him hurt any more than he already is… he'll remember when he's ready, right?"
The girl in the gown waved her hand dismissively. "That's how you always handle things," she scolded, "You wait for everyone to solve your problems… then you discard them when they're no longer useful."
Right before Meiko's eyes the girl's clear human skin turned to wood, her shoulders and elbows replaced by ball joints, her scowling face turning to paint. "Or is this what you're still afraid of?!"
All at once Meiko's nerves left her – she never wanted to stare into that reflection again and see those horrible empty eyes staring back. She never wanted to return to the days of pure isolation, hidden from everyone around her.
"Princess?"
She heard Kaito's voice and turned, barely registering the images from the crystals returning to her home, her bedroom.
"Princess, don't worry, I'll make it all right!"
There he stood, as she remembered him. An innocent human boy. Her first friend – her only friend.
The one she would abandon.
Her body lost all feeling as her limbs became wooden once more…
Miku tried to stay ahead of her pursuers, but it seemed as if she was running into a maze of lookalike corridors, constantly returning to the same place. And whenever she thought she was safe… one of the Mouse Royals would be there waiting for her.
Len, the ferocious swordmaster. Rin, the cunning sorceress.
"What makes you think you can go home?!" she said tauntingly, "Our reach is endless!"
She had a sword on her, she could fight them! Why didn't she have the nerve?!
"You're scared, that's why! You're pretending nothing bothers you so nobody will know you're a coward!"
And all the while this miserable specter was chasing her, taunting her in her own voice. A cruel doppelganger that knew how to push every one of her buttons. Where had she come from?! Why was she able to keep chasing her?!
At that moment Len leapt out at her, slashing his sword right at her. Miku just barely dodged his attack, drawing her own weapon to defend herself as she looked for an escape.
"You won't abandon the Nutcracker, will you?" he asked, "Then suffer your punishment. Maybe we'll run you straight through!"
Miku tried to back away, finding herself up against a wall of crystals and trying desperately to maintain a brave heart even as he advanced on her. Rin approached behind him, her crown nestled between her fuzzy ears. As they stood their threatening her, she couldn't bear it any longer. She had to force them to answer her, even if she couldn't protect herself.
"What did Kaito do to you to make you chase him so?!"
They stopped advancing, growing silent. "Well?! You must know! You MUST!"
For just a split second, Miku thought she saw the images of her tormentors flickering in front of her… like tricks of the light…
"We… we must have revenge!" Rin cried out half-heartedly, her tail whipping with rage.
Her hesitancy made Miku start to understand a valuable detail. She began to stride towards the mice without fear. "But for what crime? I know why you hate me, I attacked the both of you. But you never told me why you're after Kaito… and he doesn't remember."
The mice stayed perfectly still. Miku drew her sword, trying to steady her shaking hand. Len finally charged at her, his own weapon extended…
… only for Miku's sword to pass straight through his body as she tried to run him through. His own weapon never harmed her. "Neither one of you are real… are you?"
Miku glared at the image of the Mouse Queen, who appeared defiant of the pigtailed girl. "You wouldn't answer my question about Kaito… because you're creatures born out of my thoughts. And I don't know what you did to Kaito."
She felt courage welling up in her heart. "But… even if you are fake… I'm still going to fight the real you too. Maybe not like a soldier, but I'll find some way."
She pressed a hand to her chest. "Fine, I am frightened still… I don't know if I'll make it home and see my family again."
She finally looked her own reflection in the eye. "But I'll accept that… and keep on looking for an answer! Even if the toymaker isn't it, I'll still keep fighting! And…"
She felt her emotions welling up. "And… I'll even find out what happened to my Nutcracker and save him too…"
All at once the cavernous maze faded from the crystal walls. As Miku suspected, she'd not been running through an actual maze - she'd been running in circles. Another illusion.
Rin and Len vanished into nothingness, leaving just Miku's doppelganger. "You did well, mortal. Such strength of spirit is necessary to survive in this world."
All at once the playful cruelty vanished, the girl becoming serious and stoic. "Tell me where Kaito and Meiko are! NOW!" Miku said as she stomped her foot.
Her reflection walked out of the crystal, taking her by the hand. "The Nutcracker's trial is the most painful… I shall take you to his first."
Meiko clutched her body tightly, trying to contain her feelings. Her muscles felt stiff… like wood. She worriedly examined her hands, watching the patterns begin to form on her skin, her fingers taking on a square shape.
"You deserve this! You told on us!"
She stared up at the Mouse Queen and King, clasping their hands and tails as one. "How many mice ended up dead because of you?"
"But I never asked for anyone to be killed!" She protested, "I didn't want anyone to be hurt! I… I just…"
"Meiko?"
She looked to Kaito, standing in the windowsill. She wanted to cry… but her wooden face and painted eyes allowed nothing to flow. "Kaito, please, stop trying to help me…" she pleaded, "I'm just an ugly wooden doll… nobody needs me anymore…"
The doll princess in her reflection laughed. "Oh, stop with that sob story, that's not how it happened!"
Meiko felt as if the weight of the world was about to crush her. She'd been told the curse couldn't affect her again… not so long as Kaito remained under its thrall… yet here she was… Kaito was human and she was a doll…
Miku followed her "twin" through the caverns, watching as the walls began to take on the appearance of a castle. "Is this… Kaito's trial?" she asked.
Every hallway was a perfect match of her toy castle. She could practically imagine Gakupo calling out all the rooms and inhabitants. She tried to recall the story he told her, wondering what clues he'd left behind.
She finally spied a magnificent indoor garden. "The level of detail here… this must be where Kaito's illusion led him!" She pressed on to find him, hoping he was close to breaking his way out on his own…
"M…Miku said I wasn't ugly…" Kaito whispered. Yet hearing his princess tell him so…
The human Kaito stood behind her. "But they called you that. You, the great hero who saved the princess, just a horrible Nutcracker cast out…"
The scenery began to change and now Kaito was in a darkened bedroom. The princess lay in the shadows, her curtains drawn tight and allowing only slivers of light to reach her. Her body was wooden, her face a frozen, painted mask. She wasn't quite a Nutcracker, but her appearance clearly unsettled those around her.
Kaito felt a strong, firm hand grip his shoulder in a reassuring manner… wait, he felt it?! How?! He stared at himself and his body was flesh and blood. He tried to pat himself down, astounded that he could feel… everything! He was human!
He looked behind him to see the man who had given him this revelation. A taller man with long purple hair pulled back in a ponytail. He didn't look that much older than Kaito himself, but something about his manner suggested his appearance was concealing his true age.
"Kaito, you were the only one who had a pure enough heart to find that uncrackable nut," the man said with an encouraging smile, "I suspect you're the only one who can open it without breaking your teeth as well. Now, remember your instructions?"
Miku's guide grabbed her hand and dragged her toward a large window. Inside the curtains were drawn, but the window had been cracked open to allow her to hear voices. She tried to tug the curtains apart to spy inside…
She almost passed out right then at the sight… Kaito, as a human, staring right up into the face of her godfather, Gakupo.
"Uncle…?" Kaito said, sounding unsure as he spoke the words.
'Gakupo… is Kaito's uncle?!'
She wanted to cry out to them, but as if anticipating her reaction, Miku's guide squeezed her hand. 'Then Kaito has to do this alone…' she thought, turning back to watch the proceedings, 'Gakupo must be an illusion too…'
She tried to get a better look at everything and she started to realize that even if she'd not been a previous witness to these events, they did bear a strong resemblance to the story Gakupo had concocted for her just a day ago about the people in her toy castle.
"All at once, the Princess found herself under a cruel enchantment, transformed into a grotesque living doll, frightening all who looked upon her with her wretched appearance… "
'But that princess looks like Meiko!' she thought to herself.
She looked so sad and miserable, everyone around her trying to stay as far from her as they could. 'Do they really hate the dolls that much? Sure she looks weird, but she's just a doll, not a monster…'
Even if he wasn't real, the false Gakupo's bright smile was just as powerful as the one she'd known all her life. "Kaito, the steps for the curse. Crack the nut in your teeth, then give it to Princess Pirlipat. Close your eyes, then walk backwards seven steps without stumbling… and the magic will end."
"And in exchange for saving her from this wretched curse," The king proclaimed, "You'll have my daughter's hand in marriage! You'll be a prince!"
Miku felt her cheeks grow hot on the word "marriage."
Kaito tried to block out the memories flooding into his head. How terrible this day truly was. He didn't want to remember anything but he couldn't stop the rush any longer.
"You can't forget anymore," the other Kaito said, "You can't run from the past. You did this for her, and you know what you got out of it."
The princess' sad painted eyes stared into his… he didn't want her to suffer.
He stepped forward, placing the walnut between his teeth. A loud crack sounded as he easily broke through the shell. He approached the princess, dropping the nut into his hands and handing it to her.
"I… I can't see you in pain anymore…" he said, and as the words left his lips, he understood that this wasn't the first time he'd said it.
She placed the filling into her mouth… at once, her skin softened and turned white and clear, the paint on her face melting away as her proper features returned. She touched her cheeks with her normal hands and he thought she was going to cry. But his role wasn't yet over…
He closed his eyes, taking every step ever so slowly. Maybe he would be able to escape his true fate if he did it right this time…
"Silly human, you really think you'll escape my spell like that? If I can't have the princess, then I'll have you instead!"
Miku knew that tiny female voice and she searched until she quickly spied two familiar figures… the Mouse King and Queen, tiny and the size of true mice. They bound their tails together as Kaito was about to take his seventh step… his ankle caught upon them. She gasped as he tumbled backwards to the floor…
…CLACK!
By the time Kaito hit the ground, he was no longer a human, but a wooden doll just as Miku had known him to be.
"Hee hee! Have fun with your wedding, ugly Nutcracker!" Rin called out as she and Len skittered into a mouse hole and escaped.
At once utter chaos erupted around them. Kaito tried to stand up again, his wooden joints so much less nimble, and all the while the people around him gaped in horror and disgust at him.
"My god, it's hideous!"
"The princess having to marry that miserable thing?! Unthinkable!"
"Don't let that horrible Nutcracker anywhere near her!"
He stared into the eyes of the princess… his friend… someone he trusted…
Her brown eyes wide with horror, she let out a bloodcurdling scream.
The guards began to descend on him, pinning his arms behind his back and holding him fast. "Drosselmeyer, what kind of scheme are you pulling?!" The King balked, "Passing off a nutcracker as a husband for my daughter?!"
The toymaker's initial horror seemed to vanish as the insult sank in. "How dare you talk to him like that after what he's done for you! You reckless idiot, first you put your daughter in danger, then you throw away her savior?! My nephew!"
The king's face turned scarlet with rage. "I want both of them gone from my sight! From this kingdom! Let the mice decide what to do with you!"
As Kaito found himself dragged backwards, he struggled to stay. He kept watching the princess, hoping she would intervene on his behalf.
Instead, she spurned him again.
"Get that horrible, ugly Nutcracker away from me!"
All Kaito could see or hear was her cruel face, shouting the insults over and over again. Everything began to fade, but all he understood was his failure. What he'd become, so abominable that he'd driven this poor girl to pure fear.
"That is your reward, 'hero.'"
Kaito slumped to the ground, no longer bound by the guards. His failure had cost him so much… even his uncle had lost his home, his stature… all because of his own mistake.
He felt as if he was sinking into an endless abyss. He wanted to leave this behind forever… he wanted to forget…
"You have your escape… you wanted this, remember?"
Kaito yearned to hollow himself out and never awaken. His body felt so heavy and empty as a crushing power pressed down against him…
"In the end, it was not Drosselmeyer who saved her, but his nephew… only for the boy's kindness to become his undoing…"
Miku couldn't hold back her tears as she watched poor Kaito suffer such cruelty. Gakupo's tale coming to such a sad end! He'd warned that the toymaker's nephew suffered for his kindness, but he hadn't warned her how much cruelty he'd experienced for a pure-hearted deed. Nor had he warned her that the princess was such a selfish, superficial monster…
She watched as Kaito's illusions diminished. The wall in front of her vanished, the two of them surrounded by darkness. She wondered if he was finally free of his trial, but the crystal walls had yet to return.
Kaito suddenly fell lifelessly to the floor, his limbs rigid. Miku got a look at his face and the expression had become entirely empty, two painted on eyes staring ahead. Like he'd fully become a normal toy again.
Miku sprang into action, rushing towards his side. She'd expected the other Miku or Kaito to step in her way, but neither of them prevented her from reaching Kaito's side. "Kaito! Kaito, please, look at me!"
When his body remained motionless, Miku's heart pounded. Had his own personal trial completely consumed him!? "Kaito, please, wake up! My Nutcracker, please!"
Kaito heard Miku's voice crying out to him, he could just barely see her, but he couldn't even feel her as she shook his body around. Why couldn't he have just stayed a doll?! It didn't matter when that was all he thought he was… now that he knew what he used to be, what he should be capable of, all he could sense was what he lost…
"Kaito… I'm not leaving you until you wake up!"
He heard his other self speaking to him again. "Can you be sure she won't turn on you?"
"Kaito, I promise I'll never treat you like she did! You're not ugly, there's nothing wrong with you, you're my dear nutcracker!"
But she sounded so sincere… and hadn't he promised to help her? If he disappeared again, she might never go home. She would lose her family just as he had lost his…
"Kaito… I won't give up on you… so please come back… I'll never let you be that lonely again…"
He tried to stop himself from completely retreating… he tried to focus on her voice and become himself again.
Kaito's eyes began to move again, his face coming to "life" as he started to sit up again. "Miku… you're real, right?"
The pig-tailed girl nodded her head quickly.
"You haven't learned anything, have you? You're going to get hurt even worse for her."
Miku wanted to start shouting at the illusory human Kaito, but as the doll version sat up, he stared at the boy. "I… I know that might happen. But… I have learned something."
He looked back to Miku and smiled at her. "I've learned that no matter what, there are always kind people worth fighting for!"
He returned to the other Kaito. "I am scared of getting hurt again. I admit it. I… really did want to forget everything. It was easier being a doll if I never knew the truth. But… I can't help Miku if I keep hiding from the past either! And I… I want to help save Miku more than I want to forget what happened to me."
"Do you still care nothing for yourself?" the other Kaito asked.
Kaito shook his head. "I… I have to take care of myself because… I can't help anyone if I'm gone. And… now I know someone out there is looking for me too. I have to get back to him."
Finally the darkness faded and the normal walls of the cavern appeared around Miku and Kaito. The nutcracker stood up to his full height, looking to his human counterpart. "Meiko. Take me to Meiko."
No matter how much she tried to escape him, every corridor Meiko ran down led her right back to Kaito. Her heavy wooden footsteps clacked against the floor.
"You know how to end this! Just let him help you!"
"NO!" Meiko shouted, "I can't! I can't do that again!"
She finally collapsed in a heap as yet another corridor led her to Kaito. He innocently walked over to her, holding out the cracked nut in his hands. "Don't worry, princess, I'm here to rescue you!" he said with that ever present smile on his lively face.
She saw her other self in the crystals around her. "Just take it and push the burden to him. Then it won't be your problem anymore!"
"I don't want to see you suffer anymore, Princess."
Meiko stood up and timidly held out her hand. Maybe this was her second chance? If she did everything right, they would both be saved and she could stop everything she'd set into motion…
She took the walnut pulp into her fingers and the second it passed her lips she felt flesh and blood return to her.
"Enjoy your ugly little groom!"
She heard the Mouse Queen's taunting and that horrible crack as Kaito fell to the ground. He rose in horror as he saw what he'd become - nothing had changed. She'd passed her curse onto the man who'd risked everything to save her. The Mouse Royals grabbed hold of Kaito and began to drag him away. "No! Stop it! Bring him back!"
His painted on eyes stared up into hers and Meiko couldn't stand it any longer. She clenched her sword close and began to run after him.
"Now now, that's not what you did," her other self chided, "You started this war in the first place by being a spoiled girl who wanted to get back at her parents."
This was true. She loathed being the daughter of the Marzipan Court. Nobody treated her like a person, but a pretty accessory. She'd gotten so angry at her father one day that when she'd caught the mice sneaking around the castle… she'd led them straight to the cellar herself. If he couldn't work up being worried about her, then let him be upset about not getting his precious shortcakes that night.
"I… I couldn't plan on my father starting a war over something so stupid!"
Len glared at her angrily. "But you lied to him when you saw how angry he was!"
Rin actually looked sad. "We weren't hurting anything… you said everything would be okay… then you turned your backs on us! You claimed we tricked you and then he set his machines on us!"
They kept dragging Kaito but she kept pursuing them. Not this time. She would not lose him this time.
"Pirlipat…" he said quietly, "I'm sorry I failed you…"
"Now what was it you said? Oh, right…" her reflection taunted, "Get that horrible, ugly Nutcracker away from me!"
Meiko hesitated in her footsteps. On that horrible day, when everyone erupted into fright and disgust over what had become of Kaito, it had been so much easier for her to be like them. To see him the way they had seen her. And she'd screamed at him rather than risk even a little inconvenience to try and protect him.
And now she couldn't even forgive herself. Kaito had treated her like an equal, when everyone else was terrified of her or her family. Always smiling for her and trying his best to cheer her up. She was so frightened of people that it was easier to just give them orders, but he wasn't remotely scared of her and so he became her only friend. And he never looked at her as a freak when even her own parents could barely stand to be in the same room with her as she hid away to suffer her curse in private.
She began to close the distance between the mice and herself. She drew her weapon and waved it as menacingly as she could. "I apologize for the burden I placed upon your kind, but I can't allow you to take vengeance on him in my stead!"
They stopped pulling, releasing Kaito as he clattered to the floor. "Then you'll take his place?"
Meiko stopped, her fear rising as she remembered how horrible it was to be a doll. It was like barely being alive… but… Kaito had become like this because of her…
"If… If it will stop the war… I'll… I'll do it. If it will save Kaito, I'll do it. I… I can't change what I did before, but if I have to give up everything I am now… then I will. To set things right."
She closed her eyes, waiting for that horrible feeling of nothingness to consume her once more.
But she remained flesh and blood.
She opened her eyes, only seeing her white-eyed copy in front of her. "You really believed that would work," she said. Yet now she didn't sound cruel… just sad.
Meiko looked around her, seeing no sign of the many corridors of the castle that she'd run through. 'Illusions… they were all illusions…'
Good illusions. "Hmph. Even if it wasn't really that simple," she said, feeling a little bolder, "I'm still going to do whatever it takes to set this right. I never claimed to be innocent, and I won't protest it either. I left the castle, my home, my life… and my name. And I'll stay like this until it's all over!"
She didn't want to imagine how angry Kaito would be when he realized the truth. He might just abandon her this time. She'd deserve it. Yet…
"Even if he hates me forever, I'll still do what I can to set him free from my curse. I'll tell him everything… and let him have it out with me however he wishes!"
The other "her" turned her head and Meiko followed her gaze. She gasped on seeing Kaito and Miku walking out of the hallways. At first she questioned if they too were illusory, until she saw each one had another white-eyed copy of themselves with them.
So that was the danger of the Crystalline Caverns. Becoming trapped within a personal trial, never escaping them. But… did that mean they had seen even a part of her own trial?
"Kaito…" she began to say.
"Princess Pirlipat."
He cut her off, uttering her true name.
Miku was practically shaking from what she'd just witnessed. She mourned for Kaito, trying to help someone he cared for and losing everything for it – his humanity, his home, his family. She wanted things to be simple so she could just hate the princess who hurt him… but Meiko wasn't that simple either. Her bizarre behavior seemed to make sense now – she couldn't completely reconcile her past crimes against Kaito with the present of having him already trusting her.
Kaito broke away from Miku's side, slowly walking towards Meiko. The "princess" tried to stand as bravely as possible, her shoulders squared as she prepared herself for whatever he was going to say to her…
"I'm glad you're safe."
Miku's jaw hung open at Kaito's calm words. His face wore a simple wooden smile as he continued walking calmly towards the similarly shocked Meiko. "Kaito, I ruined everything for you! You should be… furious!"
Yet fury seemed the farthest emotion from Kaito's mind. "But you're okay now. I freed you from the curse. That's all I wanted."
'I thought he wanted to marry her?' Miku thought to herself, her cheeks turning red again.
"You… you… stop smiling like that! You never think about what that looks like!" Meiko argued, "I hurt you! You can't just keep pretending that didn't happen!"
A few tears formed in Meiko's eyes as her tough pose began to break. "You're always the same, Kaito… you know I'm not deserving of forgiveness and yet…"
Kaito laughed. "Ah, there's nothing to forgive!" he said, "You didn't even have to get married, so everything worked out perfectly!"
Meiko didn't seem to want to hear it. "But Kaito, what about you!? The curse didn't break, it just shifted to you! My parents are trying to capture you because as long as you're still bound by its power, the mice can't use their magic on me anymore!"
"THAT'S why they're hunting Kaito?!" Miku exclaimed, "That's terrible!"
Meiko hung her head. "When I found out about it, I couldn't stand for it anymore… I'd been feeling utterly ill ever since I sent you away as it was. When I realized they just wanted to trap you in a cell until the war ended, I'd had enough. I stole this officer's uniform and sword and ran away from home…"
She looked up to him sadly. "I didn't know if I'd ever find you, but I had to try."
The light laughter that came from Kaito startled both of them again. "Well then, I definitely can't stay angry! Coming all this way out here to help me even after I was the one who messed up breaking the curse!"
Miku couldn't imagine what more she could say. Kaito had such a pure heart, incapable of hatred. Meiko wiped the tears from her eyes. Now that her true identity was unveiled, she seemed a lot calmer.
"It's good to remember you again, Princess Pirlipat."
Upon her real name being used, Meiko made an odd face, scrunching up her nose. "Uh… please, just keep calling me Meiko."
The brunette fiddled with her fingers. "If nothing else, it'll make it harder for people to find me."
Kaito's laughter echoed in the caverns. "If you say so, Meiko!"
The nutcracker tapped his chin with his fingers. "So… I have an uncle…" he murmured, "Drosselmeyer didn't build me… he's family… that makes all of this easier to understand."
"Kaito, if you remember who he is now, do you at least remember what happened to him?" Miku asked.
The nutcracker tilted his head. "I definitely remember seeing him last at the workshop… but… I don't really remember that much about what happened when we got there… we'd been running from the mice for so long..."
The horrible image of Kaito collapsing to the ground like an empty doll haunted Miku's memories. Seeing his nephew like that would have broken Gakupo's heart…
It was definitely Gakupo – seeing him within Kaito's illusion only proved that. The face, the voice, the mannerisms… there was no mistaking that at one time he'd been Drosselmeyer. Perhaps he never mentioned his nephew because it was too painful to even speak of him. He couldn't very well say his nephew had died, Kaito was "alive"… but nobody in her world would believe he'd turned into a doll either.
But now she did.
"Kaito… that might be when you 'fell asleep'…" Miku said, carefully using his words even though to her he actually seemed dead.
Kaito seemed to be accepting Miku's explanation. "Maybe the mice caught us and made me go to sleep… that could be how I wound up with your godfather… and… my uncle, I guess."
The mental image seemed rather pleasing to the nutcracker given his goofy smile. "Ah! That's so exciting! I actually have a family! I can't wait to see him again!"
Miku turned to see the visages that had set up the "trials" in this cavern had yet to depart. "Can any of you show us the way out?" she asked.
With a tilt of the head, Miku's copy began to walk down the dark paths of the tunnels, followed by the false Kaito and Meiko.
After what felt like at least another hour of navigation, just long enough for Miku to worry that she might have made a mistake asking for help from these strange figures, a light appeared at the end of the tunnel. Miku breathed a sigh of relief – they hadn't lost all of their daylight yet. Their guides came to a stop.
"We can't take you any further. The rest is up to you."
Miku searched the false Kaito's face for any other revelations, but he remained quiet. She didn't quite know whether to thank any of them – they had gotten herself and friends outside, but at the same time, they'd also nearly trapped them inside the cavern forever. The eerie white eyes of her copy kept tracking her as she walked past.
She began to leave the cavern, Meiko close by… but Miku heard Kaito's wooden footsteps stop. She looked over her shoulder to see he'd come to a complete stop, staring forlornly at his own copy. 'That's right… Kaito's reflection is a human, like he used to be,' Miku thought to herself.
She swallowed and walked back over to him. "Kaito, don't worry…" she said quietly, "I won't give up until you're free too."
For a doll, Kaito's facial expressions could be surprisingly telling. His sad expression shifted to a happier one, yet Miku noticed his mouth quivering, just a little. "Don't worry, my brave Nutcracker. We'll go home together."
"Of course we will!" he said, his voice sounding steadier, "I have to meet the rest of your family too, you know!"
'Right… that kind of makes Kaito family too, in a weird sort of way…'
To think her godfather had been lugging his nephew around in a suitcase all this time… now Miku wondered just how many other secrets he kept close to his chest.
As they walked together out of the cavern, Kaito's eyes widened upon seeing a glamorous sight. He broke away from Miku as he ran forward through the snow, holding his arm aloft. "Miku! That's the Rose Lake! We're almost there!"
His happy laughter cheered Miku up. "I'm almost home again!"
A/N:
Phew, this was a heavy one. A number of payoffs chaining together, plus I got to delve a little into my interpretation of the Nutcracker's history.
In the original novel, the "Tale of the Hard Nut" is three chapters long. This covers the entire history of all the characters in the Land of Dolls and Sweets along with Drosselmeyer, and eventually the Nutcracker himself. It is also the ONLY appearance of Princess Pirlipat, who only appears in the novel. Also, it is told, in its entirety, by Drosselmeyer to Marie while she's recovering in bed from getting her arm scraped up. I wanted the backstory spread out a little more effectively than that. I wanted Kaito and Miku to learn things as they go, and to
I hesitate to say too much more about the Nutcracker's part in the Tale of the Hard Nut, since Kaito's story is very different. Suffice it to say though, the bizarre ritual he has to go through to break Pirlipat's curse is almost word for word the same, though I changed the conditions Kaito had to meet to break it in the first place.
Princess Pirlipat never knows the Nutcracker before he shows up to break the curse, hence why I had Meiko fearful here of being rescued and wed to a complete stranger. It was easy for me to decide to have Meiko be Princess Pirlipat, but I wasn't comfortable having her basically only exist to be a terrible person, refuse to marry Kaito, and then leave. It didn't jive with what I wanted a Meiko-based princess to be. And I got really curious about what would happen to a rude fairy tale princess if the story kept following her. She's probably been the hardest character to wrap my head around and had the most changes out of anyone in the cast, but I've enjoyed the challenge (and hey, finally Meiko has a meaty main character role.)
Oh, and the mice didn't steal syrup in the book… they stole lard for the King's sausage. Just in case you think I'm making up a war over something silly, no, it was always silly! I just thought something sweet made more sense given the name of the Kingdom. Princess Pirlipat is a baby when she's cursed though, so she really is innocent. Oh, and more fun from the novel – when Drosselmeyer had to figure out how to fix the princess in the novel, his disassembles her and inspects her insides.
If it's not entirely obvious in the text, Luka was performing "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy" in the opening flashback. The Sugar Plum Fairy is probably one of the best known characters from the story, but she's entirely original to the ballet – her fame derives entirely from the easily recognizable delicate celesta instrumentation. I actually debated having Luka always appear looking like a ballerina, but decided she'd look rather strange perpetually standing around in a tutu, especially in the snow. I had a lot of leeway with the character since I'm not using the plot from the ballet, but the original backstory in the novel covered Drosselemeyer and an unnamed astrologer solving the princess' predicament by reading her horoscope. I blended the astrologer character into Luka.