Chapter 3

It was the final day of Ed and Al's time in Resembool. Tomorrow morning they would board the train to Central. Once there, Al would take the State Alchemist Exam and they would both find out their next assignment. Al sat nervously in the living room, waiting for Winry to come back in from the shop. She'd had a very busy day with several customers and had ended up working through dinner. She called to tell them she was sorry for missing dinner on their last night, but would make it up to them with a farewell breakfast that included waffles and strawberries.

If Al was going to tell her it was going to be now or never. Or at least not for several months, so now was preferable. It was 11pm and he wondered how much longer she'd be working. He tried with difficulty to control the reactions his nerves were wreaking on his body but couldn't help tapping his foot impatiently. He loved having his body back, loved touching different surfaces and textures, savoring flavors as they crossed his tongue, and generally feeling at home in his skin. However, he had to admit that some of the sensations were overwhelming. The first time he'd stepped into a hot bath after getting his body back he felt something akin to shock. The feeling of warmth and moisture completely enveloping his legs was so new and unfamiliar that he'd just stood in place for five minutes trying to process it. He'd finally sunk down, laying on his back and let the sensation flood his entire body. It had been wonderful but also overpowering. He knew that this wasn't a normal reaction to getting into a bath and it concerned him. Fortunately, over the past six months his body had become more accustomed to the feeling, and bathing ceased to have the same effect. Still, there were times when he was surprised by random sensations, his body's odd reactions to seemingly simple stimuli. Al figured that he would just have to deal with some unpredictability as his soul continued to get reacquainted with his body.

Time continued to tick slowly by. Al got up and began to pace. He had been planning what he would say for days now. He just wasn't sure it would sound right. Earlier in the evening he had asked Ed if he could run it by him to get his opinion.

"I really don't think I can help you, Al." Ed looked uncharacteristically grim. "I've never done this before and have literally as much experience with it as you do."

"Please brother. I'm really nervous and I'm afraid I'm going to say the wrong thing. I know it's not something you're familiar with but I would love your honest opinion."

"Fine. Go ahead."

Al took a deep breath. "Winry. We've known each other our whole lives. I know you better than I know almost anyone else. You've always been there for me and my brother, always taking care of us, and generally acting like the sister we've never had. But lately I've come to feel more for you than that. I love you, Winry. I hope that you feel the same way."

There was a pause and Ed absently scratched at the bridge of his nose.

"Honestly, I think it sounds a little rehearsed. Just tell her what you've been feeling. Be honest and straightforward and I'm sure….I'm sure she'll be happy to hear it."

Al sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, "You're right of course. Thank you. I guess I'll just say what I feel in the moment." He gave his brother a nervous smile. Ed would truly always be there for him.

"Look Al, I'm not feeling very well. I think I'm going to head to bed early. But, I know you're going to do just fine." Ed squeezed his brother's shoulder and gave him what he hoped was a reassuring look.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Al had noticed dark circles under Ed's eyes and that his good humor had seemed to disintegrate as the day wore on.

Ed was already heading up the stairs. "Yeah, definitely. I'll be fine. G'night and good luck, Al."

Pinako had gone to bed two hours ago by the time Al finally heard Winry's steps on the front porch. He noticed that she looked weary, but satisfied. She had some streaks of grease across her arms and one on her cheek that streaked across her nose.

"Al, what are you still doing up?" Winry looked surprised but happy to see him. She walked over and plopped herself down on the couch next to him with a tired sigh and closed her eyes.

Al sat up straighter, his body responding to her proximity and his heart pounding. "I, I just wanted to get a chance to talk to you alone before we leave tomorrow."

"Oh?" She opened one eye to look at him.

"How was the shop today?" He asked, stalling for time.

"Oh it was great! I started on a new design for a leg that I'm pretty excited about. I also finished and outfitted two arms and a hand. There have been so many new customers that I think I might need to hire some help soon. If only I could convince Paninya to move up here." She did her best to stifle a yawn.

"Wow that would be great, I haven't seen Paninya in a long time." There was a pause and then Al continued. "Winry, do you know you have grease streaks all over you?" He started to fish out his handkerchief.

"Jeez, I guess I'm kind of a mess." Winry admitted, stretching her arms out in front of her for inspection.

"Here, you have a streak on your face too." Al moved in closer and gently wiped at the black mark, sliding the handkerchief from the bridge of her nose onto her cheek, just below her eye.

"Thanks so much, Al." Winry laughed. "You know, sometimes I feel like I'm always taking care of the two of you, but you take care of me a lot too."

Al was having trouble preventing his hand from shaking and her face was just so close to his. He was always forgetting just how blue her eyes were. Before he could stop himself he blurted out, "Winry, I love you!"

Horrified at his own bluntness he drew back and looked straight down at the couch, but not before seeing the shock plastered across Winry's face.

"I, I'm really sorry. I didn't mean it to come out like that at all." Al took a deep breath, still looking down at the couch. "It's true though. You've always been important to me Winry and you've only become more important as we've gotten older. Ever since I got my body back I've come to realize how much I've grown to love you. I want to make you happy." He plunged ahead towards the final question. "I hope I can be the person to do that. Do you want me to be?"

It was only now that he chanced to look up, his heart hammering against his ribs, hoping against all hope to see her smile. But Winry hadn't moved. The look on her face was far from inscrutable. It was just as shocked as before, likely its expression hadn't even changed.

"I, I need a moment or two to process this." Winry finally stammered. She looked down at her hands, then up at Al, and then quickly back down at her hands.

Every second felt like agony to Al. He did the best he could to control his breathing and tried to be patient.

Finally Winry raised her head to look at him. "I'm, I'm truly stunned Al. I honestly had no idea. I'm not quite sure what to say."

This gave Al hope. Winry hadn't known his feelings, but maybe now that she did she could discover some within herself and grow to love him.

"You're so important to me, Al. Everyday I'm so happy to have you in my life. But, I can't…...I just can't return your feelings. You're like a dear, dear brother, and I can't foresee that ever changing."

And with that final statement all of Al's hopes and his dreams for a future with her seemed to be sucked into a void that had formed in the center of his chest. It physically pained him.

He swallowed and looked away. "Right, I understand…...thank you for your honesty."

"I'm, I'm truly very sorry." Winry's eyes had begun to swim and Al could tell she was doing her best to keep tears at bay.

"I don't think I can stay here tonight, Winry. I'll sleep at the train station and take the early morning train tomorrow." He stood up, doing his best to mentally contain and minimize his pain. "Please tell Ed that I'll see him in Central."

"No, wait Al! You can stay here tonight! Please don't go!" But by the time she finished Al was already out the door.

Winry stared at the now empty space for several moments, trying to gather her thoughts and pull together some semblance of composure. She had already been feeling exhausted, but now she felt utterly wretched. In a million years she had never wanted to hurt Al.

Suddenly she became aware of a presence behind her. She spun around to find Ed watching her with a dark grimace.

"What the hell did you do that for?" He was rigidly leaning against the doorway to the living room with his arms crossed.

"Ed, I-"

"He's the best man I know and you've gone and broken his heart."

Winry bristled, "Ed, I was just being honest. And as it was I think I let him down pretty gently. Regardless, it was still a shock to even hear him say-"

"Oh I'm sure you're SO shocked that he could have developed feelings for you, Winry," Ed's glare was irate and full of disbelief. "I'm sure there's no way you noticed his infatuated stares or blatant flirting in the past six months either."

Winry had never seen Ed like this. She should have expected it though. Anytime something involved his brother his emotions ran high. She could tell he was mad, but there was also a look in his eye that she couldn't decipher. Panic maybe. Or desperation?

"Ed, I don't know what to say! I do love Al, but he's like a brother to me. Anything else would be….strange."

"Would it really be that strange?" Ed demanded. "I'm sure you would love him in the end. He would give you everything. Winry, he's…..he's crazy about you! He just wants to make you happy, and all you've done is tear him down!"

Winry was mad now in the way that only Ed ever seemed to elicit. She stormed up to him, fists clenched at her sides. "I have the right to choose who I love Ed! Believe me, I know how great Al is, I know he's kind and wonderful and caring and smart. But I don't love him, not like he wants me to. And that's the end of it!"

He didn't respond, he only stood over her looking furious. They glared at each other until her body fully realized his proximity. She looked into his face, so close to hers, his eyes although currently fierce, were still the beautiful pools of molten gold she had always admired. The muscles in his shoulders and arms stood out in his tank, tight with tension. She blushed faintly and stepped back, turning away.

"I don't want to fight with you about this, Ed. In fact, I'd like to be alone right now."

Ed, straightened and took a breath. He looked at her again with that same, indecipherable look. She thought it was anger, hurt, and despair all in one piercing stare. "I think I'll catch up with Al at the train station." And he was gone.

Winry collapsed into the nearest chair and rested her head in her hands. She knew that Ed and Al were incredibly close, but she hadn't thought that turning Al down would have this kind of effect on Ed. In fact, she had hoped for an entirely different reaction. For him to be relieved, maybe. For him to look at her the way that Al had. For him to want her for himself instead of for his brother. Instead she was shocked by his utter resentment of her for turning Al down. He must truly not have any feelings for her. The thought made her chest feel tight.

And Al, poor Al, how must he be feeling? Winry had noticed that he had been acting strangely in the past six months, a lot of blushing and smiles, some cryptic conversation. But she'd chalked it up to him getting his body back and the understandable adjustments that likely came with it. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Al, sweet, sensitive Al. She owed him her honesty, though. Sadly, Winry realized that her relationship with the Elric brothers would never be the same. Suddenly she felt weary.

She took a deep breath and tried to rally. This was stupid. It was silly. She shouldn't be worrying about boys. She had her new shop to think about, and there was so much work to be done. After everything she'd learned and experienced in Rush Valley she was now considered one of the best automail mechanics in the region, and was well on her way to becoming an authority in the field. That was what was important, those were her dreams. And they didn't need to include the Elric brothers, right? She, she didn't need either of them. Especially Ed. Especially now that she knew…..

And even though she'd promised herself she'd never cry over them again she let the tears flow, cursing Ed at the same time as she mourned what would never come to pass between them.