Notes: First off, thanks to everyone who's reading! Second, I just wanted to let you know that I have a busy couple of weeks coming up. I'm going to try and write as much as I can in my free time to get an update for you, but it most likely will be a while before another installment is ready. You have my apologies for that.

The two scenes in this chapter take place at approximately the same time.

At first Farkle can't believe the quickly circulating rumors. Nobody has any real details to speak of because all they saw was the aftermath, but everyone is saying that the much anticipated conversation between Riley and Maya had ended with Riley having some sort of breakdown. And Farkle just can't imagine that. Even with things so disjointed between them, he can't picture either girl taking things so far that the other was left shattered. They've been best friends for nearly ten years and a bond like that doesn't just go away.

Even less believable to him is that Riley is the one left broken. Not that he thinks Riley is capable of being coldhearted or mean-spirited enough to do or say anything that would leave Maya a wreck (he doesn't think Maya is either, but she's better at pretending that she could be) but given how little they've been talking and seeming to understand each other lately, Farkle can at least understand how something might be misinterpreted enough to bring the talks to a standstill and have someone storm off again. It even makes sense to him that that someone would be Maya.

But even for all of his worries about how Riley has been handling everything and how much she's hurting herself by not accepting anyone's help or talking about it, Farkle absolutely cannot fathom a scenario where she would actually break. Over the years he's seen her happy, sad, and everywhere in between and even at her most upset, Riley has always been strong. She doesn't crumble or dwell on things; she cries, yells, or whatever else she might need to do to let things out but then she moves on and finds a solution to the problem. He's always admired her for it and it doesn't seem like a trait that could just disappear. So he figures that maybe someone saw her crying and exaggerated the situation. After all, they're not very used to seeing anything but smiling Riley.

Only the stories persist.

Lucas actually takes off without a word the moment he hears, leaving Farkle and Zay to check on Maya and get her side, he supposes.

Then the details grow. According to Jenkins and the cheer squad (who are often the most reliable sources for gossip if only because they make an effort not to spread the blatantly nasty stuff) nobody saw the actual event but afterward Miss Burgess found Riley incoherent and crying on the floor and couldn't get her to calm down or explain what had happened to put her in such a state. All anyone else seems to know is that she was still a mess from the clumsy seventh grader who dropped their lunch on her and that Maya is nowhere to be found, hence everyone assuming Riley's upset has something to do with their talk.

By the time the lunch period is over and Farkle gets to his study hall (and Lucas doesn't show up to join him) he's starting to think that there's some truth to the story, although he still doesn't believe it could really have been something between the girls that caused it. The Maya he knows has a tough exterior and at times might as well be a brick wall for how stubborn and unmoving she can be but she also cares deeply for people, particularly Riley, and doesn't just lash out with no reason. Not to mention, even when she does it's rarely with the sort of personal attack that would genuinely hurt someone who knows her as well as Riley does.

No, Farkle has to believe that, if anything, the girls conversation had been cut short by the lunchroom accident and Maya had gone to get Riley a shirt from the gym or something, leaving Riley alone. Then maybe Riley had gotten word that one of her grandparents had passed. He can imagine the death of a close relative being something that makes Riley breakdown much more than he can imagine Maya doing anything.

This scenario doesn't make him feel any better (how could it if Riley is really in that much pain) but it at least makes sense and to verify that he's on the right path Farkle pulls out his phone, positioning it carefully behind his books, and texts his mom.

Has there been any news about the Matthews?

It takes her nearly a minute to respond.

No, not since this morning but I'm on my way to pick Riley up. School was a bit much for her it seems. Do you want to come home with us?

Farkle knows that this is much more of a request than it is an offer. His mother, for all of her occasional petty fights with his dad and the odd comments people wrote in her high school yearbook, is very caring and attentive, but she is also the first to admit that she doesn't deal extraordinarily well with 'flagrant displays of emotion' (her words, not his). It's why she and his father get along so well to begin with; they both love passionately and strive to be the best but fail to understand the histrionics of others.

Her message tells Farkle that the rumors are very much true and that Riley has not only been upset by something, but upset by it enough that the school wants to send her home and his mom is worried that she won't be nurturing or helpful enough in the face of it.

Definitely not a good sign.

Sure. I'll be ready. Just let me know when you get here.

Farkle tucks his phone away again and requests a pass to the library. He's not going to go, but he needs the study supervisor to let him out of the room. If he's going to be leaving when his mom gets here and then trying to help Riley, he wants to know exactly what he's dealing with and he has a limited amount of time now to get that information. A couple of white lies will go a long way to making that happen.

He gets the pass without any trouble and heads out, stopping briefly at his locker to exchange the books in his bag for the ones he might need that night. Then Farkle swings by the nurse's office (where everyone leaving the school for non-disciplinary reasons waits) to get a better idea of what happened. The door to the office is closed, but as Farkle had suspected, a peek through the pane of glass in the door reveals Lucas is inside with his arm around a completely exhausted and wrecked looking shell of Riley.

They appear to be having a conversation with the third person in room, whose back is to the door but eventually turns enough that Farkle can recognize him as the superintendent who's friends with Mr. Matthews. Interesting.

Farkle doesn't knock to get invited in, but waves to get Lucas' attention (Riley seems a little too out of it to notice) and when Lucas looks up, Farkle gives his best look to inquire what exactly had happened. Lucas replies by wiggling the ring finger of the hand not holding onto Riley and mouthing a single sentence.

'Maya took off her ring.'

What?

Farkle is absolutely floored. The rings are sacred. They haven't been out of the girls sight since Riley had presented them to Maya. He's fairly certain that the only times they ever get taken off is in gym class (when they're secured very carefully in their lockers) and when they're sculpting in art class (when they get slipped around the chain of whatever necklaces the girls are wearing that day). They're the strongest symbol of the bond that Riley and Maya share. They're supposed to be permanent additions to their beings. For Maya to remove hers without an extenuating circumstance...Farkle can't imagine what must have been said or done to convince her that the bond was gone or not worth the work anymore.

He pulls his phone out again, this time composing a text for Maya.

We need to talk. Janitor's closet in five minutes.

Janitor Harley is very cool and understanding about the students sometimes needing a space during the day as long as they don't take advantage. Farkle is more than willing to use that to get to the bottom of this.

His phone buzzes in his hand.

Already there.

Farkle finds Maya there, sitting on the small desk. She's spinning her ring on the surface like a coin and when she looks up her cheeks are wet. Her eyes are the same and rimmed with red.

His initial shock and anger fades back. Of course Maya is hurt by this too. She never would have removed the ring if she wasn't feeling betrayed by something, which is what's so maddening about the whole situation; he doesn't believe that either Maya or Riley has it in them to be truly mean-spirited and hateful towards the other, but maybe the stress of their current situation combined with some other outside event to make their hurt feelings and frustrations come out in some sort of ugly explosion.

Farkle doesn't understand how any of them let things get this far but he's determined to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it. Neither girl deserves to be as miserable as they seem to be.

"What happened?" He asks, sitting in the empty chair.

"You mean you don't already know?" Maya raises an eyebrow. There's a hardness and a sarcasm in her voice that Farkle hasn't heard directed towards him in years she's already on the defensive, yet another thing he can't begin to hope to explain.

"All I know is that you took off your ring and Riley's upset because of it."

Maya mutters a word or two under her breath that Farkle can't quite catch then speaks up, still bitter. "Shouldn't you be with her then?"

Farkle wants to help. And he'll listen, comfort, assure, and any other number of things to do that, but he won't put up with pity-party comments like that that are clearly trying to push him beyond her walls. He hardens his own tone a little. "Have I ever given you any indication that you mean less to me than Riley does?" He waits for her to acknowledge that no, of course he hasn't. "Then why would I start now? I know things haven't been good for you two since Texas, but you kept your ring on, which means you though it was fixable. So if you're taking it off now, something must have happened to make you think it's not."

It takes a moment for Maya to give him an answer. "I just realized that our friendship wasn't nearly as strong as I thought."

"What made you reach that conclusion?"

"Friends don't date guys that their friends like. Not without talking about it and getting permission."

Farkle has to fight to wrap his head around the fact that this is still about Maya thinking that Riley and Lucas are together, something that they have been (honestly) denying since day one. He can understand that if Maya has genuine feelings for Lucas, that getting turned down as she had been would cause a real hurt that wouldn't just go away overnight. He can even understand irrationally disliking the next person that a crush starts seeing. But he can't figure out why Maya can't see past those feelings to realize that Riley, someone who has never lied to her about anything important, is telling the truth when she asserts that she and Lucas decided to remain friends.

Not to mention the borderline hypocrisy of her anger. Maya has clearly figured out that the brother thing was a lie, but it sounds like she still want to be with Lucas if given the chance. Isn't that the same violation of the laws of friendship that she thinks Riley is perpetrating?

No, the facts of the situation seem undeniably clear to him, even if the feelings aren't. "Right. But Riley and Lucas aren't dating."

"She still has his sweatshirt in her bag. You don't just keep some guy's clothes for no reason."

This is normally true. But Farkle believes them when they say they're just friends, even if they do both want to be more, and there are other explanations. "We know she borrowed it in Texas and it's been a crazy few weeks since. Maybe she only just got around to washing it and was going to give it back."

"You really think it took anyone in the Matthews house three weeks to do a load of laundry?"

"I think that Riley wouldn't lie to you." Farkle says. "And she's told you more than once that all she and Lucas are is friends." Maya doesn't respond and Farkle, knowing he can't have much more time before his mom arrives at the school, decides to use some of his remaining moments to present Maya with a few more of the facts she's been ignoring these past weeks. His mother had once told him that part of loving someone was letting them know when they were doing stupid things or making a big mistake (his father had added that often times the hardest but most important part of loving someone was doing this gently). "I also think that she feels horrible things didn't work out for you and that she's spent the last three weeks trying to make sure that you're OK."

"I told her to butt out."

"Well she cares too much to. She also cares too much to make the rest of us pick sides, or to not ask us how you're doing when she knows we've spent time with you or to make a big deal of the fact that you're the reason most of the school thinks that what happened in Texas is a lot more scandalous than it really was."

Maya glances down towards her lap. "I never meant for that to go all over the school."

"You didn't correct anyone either." He points out. "I know what happened hurt you. You have every right to be hurt. But you're letting your hurt cloud your judgment. You know Riley. You know she wants nothing but the best for you and you know she would never do anything intentionally to hurt you."

He has more to say but an announcement comes over the PA, calling him to the main office. He stands.

"I want to see you happy Maya. Both of you. And I guess if you think that ending your friendship with Riley is what's going to do that for you then you have to do what you have to do. But you need to think long and hard about what it is you're giving up, and if it really is going to make you happy."

Farkle leaves before Maya can form a response.

"OK, the office is going to call your parents and get everything straightened out so you can go home for the rest of the day, and I'm going to stay here until then. Is that OK?"

Riley only manages to nod at her Uncle Jon's question. She's fairly confident that never before has she been such a horrible combination of exhausted and devastated. She's still not entirely sure what even happened out in the hallway. All she knows is that one minute, she couldn't breathe or control her crying at all and it felt like she might be dying, and the next thing she knew, her Uncle Jon was crouched down next to her, guiding her through some sort of breathing exercise. He calmed her down, didn't flinch when the nausea caught up with her and she dry heaved at his feet, and then brought her to the nurse's office

Now that things are quiet again, she feels like every last ounce of her energy is gone. Even nodding is a serious effort and she can't figure any of it out. She doesn't know why Uncle Jon is at the school today. She doesn't know why everything suddenly came out in that moment, when she'd been unable to let anything out for ages. She doesn't know why she couldn't control any of it, or why it had been so intense and terrifying.

She's never been so scared in all of her life.

Her Uncle Jon sits down in the office chair from the nurse's desk and slides it closer to the cot where Riley's been resting for nearly ten minutes. "How are you doing now, kid? Is your stomach settling down OK?"

Riley struggles for a moment to find the right words. It's so obvious to her now that no matter what anyone else says something in her is broken—why else would anything like this happen-and that's a problem. Now is not the time for her to be broken; there's too much going on with her grandparents, and she has to take care of Auggie, and she has to find a way to deal with the Ma-

She cuts her own thought off when her chest starts to get tight again. She can't deal with that. Just like she can't be broken. She just needs to find a way to convince everyone that this was a fluke. Even though she doesn't know what this was.

"I'm really tired. And a little cold," because even though she had taken out her braid and run her fingers through her hair to get the bulk of the meat sauce out as a way to keep her hands busy while she finished calming down, she's still soaked with that seventh grader's lunch, "but I'm-," Riley nearly jumps when the door swings open with such force that it rebounds off the doorstop.

"What happened?" Lucas bursts into the room and for the briefest of moments Riley's back in her bedroom as he pile-drives through the wall of stuff she and Maya had barely finished putting up.

Uncle Jon's head snaps to the door and he stands. "Mr Friar..."

Lucas ignores him, walking towards her. "Everyone's saying you had some sort of a breakdown because of your talk with Maya. What happened?"

Everyone's saying that? Oh god…

It hits Riley that there were people in the hall other than her and Maya, so of course they had witnessed her epic meltdown and everything that followed. The nausea that had been ebbing away as time went on returns like a heavy stone as shame and humiliation enter the picture. Tears spring to her eyes at the very thought of what the talk must be like outside of the room now.

It's just not fair. Why can't even one part of this nightmare be private? How is she supposed to be strong when everyone else knows just how weak and broken she is?

Then Riley remembers that she is supposed to be convincing them that she's fine and having another freak out isn't going to do that. She calls on every ounce of energy she has left to stand and close the distance between her and Lucas, wrapping her arms around him; the best she'd felt in weeks was on the bench outside the history room in his arms and even if it's blurring the lines between them more than she should, she'll gladly borrow some of his strength right now and take a little comfort at the same time.

"Maya took off her ring and I overreacted a little." She says softly, swallowing thickly around the around the words. It's not the end. It can't be the end. I can fix it. "I'm OK though." Lucas' arms seem to squeeze a little tighter around her.

Uncle Jon closes the door and takes his seat again, seeming to understand that Lucas is going to be a part of the conversation. "Riley, you were having a panic attack."

Was that what that was? "No, I was just..." Riley stops talking. She doesn't have a good explanation other than what she already said. It seems smarter to stay silent than to say something that makes no sense and is an obvious lie.

"A panic attack?" Lucas guides her back to the cot.

"Maybe...I'm fine now though." She insists. They sit together.

"Do you think it had something to do with what you were telling me about after your mom called?" Lucas sounds so innocent and concerned when he asks the question, but all Riley can feel is the fragile strength she's been trying to build back up and project chipping away again.

She wants to shake her head and protest, to deflect attention away from that but finds herself unable to move or answer. There's a small part of her that's saying she needs to let the truth come out. She doesn't know a lot about panic attacks, but she's pretty sure it's not a good thing if you just randomly start having them and realizing that she probably did just have one is almost as scary as when she was in the middle of it.

Uncle Jon jumps into the conversation again before she can make a choice. "What were you telling him?"

"I was just...I..." The first time Riley tries and fails to answer it's an attempt to downplay the situation; then she thinks that maybe she just can't lie anymore so tries to tell the truth, but that won't come out either. She's just too tired and confused and unsure about what the right thing to do is anymore. She sighs, a long shaky exhale, and leans her head against Lucas. "I don't know how to explain it anymore."

Lucas launches into an explanation, and Riley just listens. He goes through everything, starting with their talk outside the history room, but then going back and explaining the bigger picture and the pressure she's been under with the Texas situation and Maya and everything else. Uncle Jon occasionally asks a question but for the most part it's just Lucas talking.

It's a strange thing, listening to it all like she's an outsider. Riley knows how much she's been dealing with of course, but she's also spent a lot of time telling herself that most of it is fixable and not a big deal. That she could handle all of it on her own, no question.

Hearing it all from Lucas' mouth, where he doesn't downplay anything or mince words is almost shocking. It sounds so horrible and hard...It starts to hit her about halfway through that it's what she's been dealing with and she starts to cry again. Not the harsh, unyielding sobs from earlier but soft, exhausted weeping.

She doesn't know how to fix any of it.