Author's Note:

OMG you guys! To say I was blown away by the adds, PMs, reviews and alerts is an understatement. I'm so happy the response to the last chapter wasn't too scary! As a thank you, I am posting the next chapter now! Thanks again guys (I don't want to be greedy but another response like the last chapter would be amazing!).

This next chapter jumps a few months. Enjoy!

Here it is!

-Lisa :)

Chapter Eighteen

As March rolled in, Edward continued to receive the help he needed after his release from the hospital. With the aid of mover's, which was over seen by Ed, Bella moved her belongings from her apartment into the guest suite at Edward's house. Seeing how emotional and fragile Bella was, Edward worked hard to get a grasp on his depression. He wanted to be there for Bella. He saw how much she had sacrificed for him. He still blamed himself for the demise of his friends' relationship, even though Bella wouldn't hear of it. Edward thought that the pregnancy really helped ease Bella through her darkest times.

Quicker than anyone thought, Edward began to rebound. He attended his therapy sessions and followed the doctor's orders. He credited Bella with his fast past recovery. He figured if she could overcome the mess Carlisle had left, then he could get over what he was going through. Edward had to get better he thought if not for himself but for Bella. Edward credited Bella with forcing him out of his depression. She made him realize how much he was loved and how much he loved, even if those words were never spoken.

Getting back on his feet was easier than he thought it would be. Edward decided not to go back to the clinic where he worked before his depression. He decided that he liked the idea of being his own boss. With some money he had save, Edward decided that he wanted to open up his own private practice. After coming home pleased to the renovated house, he decided to enlist Bella and Alice's help with the office. He wanted to keep Bella busy to keep her mind off of Carlisle. Alice helped her at work. She even promised that Bella could bring the baby to work when Esme wasn't able to watch it. To Alice and Esme's dismay, Bella refused to find out if she was having a boy or a girl. Bella had so few happy surprises in her life that she wanted one truly good one.

"So are you all set?" Edward asked as he walked into Bella's room. It was now the beginning of June. He had a conference in Seattle he was attending before he opened his practice. He invited Bella to come with him for the weekend. "We have to stop and get Alice. Why did we invite her again?"

"I'm all set. That bag is packed if you don't mind bringing it downstairs. And for your information I had plans with Alice to go to Seattle before you asked me to go with you. You told me to invite her and you'd upgrade our room to a suite." Ever since Edward had returned to his home, he and Bella had mostly slept together. She hated sleeping alone. It all began when Edward had moved back home. He was awake one night he heard Bella crying in her sleep for Carlisle. Edward had gone into her room to wake her up and calm her down. Since that night they had shared a bed. "Plus I think you might have a tiny crush on her," Bella told Edward very matter a factly.

Blushing a little, Edward shook his head. "I don't know what you are talking about Bella. She's nice but a crush? It's too soon after Tanya and I hardly know Alice."

Bella followed Edward down the stairs laughing. "Liar! First of all, it's been seven months and you have worked hard to get beyond Tanya. I'm proud of you for that and it's okay to move on, especially when you want to. Second of all, you have known Alice since you were children. You know Alice. Even if you really do don't remember her when you were children, she has been over her often and you have been at our office often enough times. I've also seen the flirting. Don't deny it, you will be wrong."

Edward shook his head. "We are on our way to get her don't say a word."

Bella stood up on her tip toes and kissed Edward's cheek. "You are adorkable when you blush. Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

The morning after the trio had arrived for the conference, Edward and Bella had gone to grab breakfast before Edward left for the day. Alice didn't want to get out of bed yet so Bella was picking up her breakfast. Edward and Bella walked into the coffee shop arm in arm and sat down.

"You know I think your just getting fat, you're not really pregnant," Edward began to joke.

Laughing, Bella looked at him. "Oh really? What made you come to this conclusion?"

"I have yet to feel the baby kick."

"Oh trust me Uncle Eddie, the baby is very active in here." Bella paused and looked at Edward. "Hey, did you call me fat?"

"Um," Edward started. "I met pleasantly plump."

"Oh Masen, you're a jerk sometimes," she chuckled. She reached across and squeezed his hand. "You are lucky that I love you."

Edward leaned across the table and kissed Bella's check. "I guess I am."

Smiling, Bella looked at her friend. "So what are we going to do about Alice?"

Leaning back in the booth, Edward rolled his eyes. "Ugh Bella, I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh come on Eddie, let's talk about it," Bella smiled.

Edward sat up and straightened himself up. "First of all, don't call me that." Edward took a deep breath and looked at Bella. "Fine, I like her, there are you happy? I like Alice and I am doing nothing about it."

"And why are you doing that?" Bella asked.

"Because she knows what I went through. She knows that I was crazy and tried to kill myself. Why would she want to be with me? I was a bit of a loser for a while."

"Oh Edward," Bella said shaking her head. "She doesn't think that at all. I think maybe you should ask her out."

Edward shook his head. "No, I'm just- no."

Bella's heart sank. She wanted to do something to help her friend. He was trying to move on but he was thinking so little of himself. She watched him walk over to the counter and pick up their order to bring back to their room. She had to come up with a plan to help Edward regain his confidence.

"Are you ready?" Edward asked holding the bag of food. Bella hooked her arm with his and started walking.

"Oh!" She shrieked.

"What? Are you okay?"

"Yes! Edward give me your hand!" Bella yelped as she grabbed Edward's hand and placed it on her stomach. "You have to feel that. Can you feel that?"

Nodding his head, "That is amazing! Hey there little person. You do exists! Hello there baby. Or maybe it's an alien. Maybe it's a little three eyed and six armed little monster." Edward looked at Bella's non impressed expression. He then looked at her stomach as he was still touching it. "Wow, is the baby always that active?"

"Yes," Bella said as her smile faded. Tears invaded her eyes. "Edward, he isn't here. He has no idea we made this little human being. He just doesn't know."

"Come here," Edward said as he pulled Bella into his arms. "He's an idiot because he just left. He could have talked to you before he left, but he didn't. Come on, I think we should get back. Alice wanted to take you shopping."

"Oh god, just leave me here. I can't keep up with that girl," Bella answered wiping her tears.

Edward laughed. "It's payback."

"For what?"

"For teasing me."

"Come on Bella, you have to come out with us," Alice begged.

"You wore me out this afternoon. My feet hurt and I'm tired. You two go to dinner," Bella insisted. Alice dropped hints that she liked Edward. Bella knew Edward liked Alice. Bella also knew that Alice really liked Edward. She was trying to play match maker. She was also really tired from Alice's shopping adventure. "I warned you this would happen Alice."

"Come one Bella, it'll be just a few hours and you'll be sitting down," Edward added.

"No. All I want to do is take a bubble bath, order a pizza with hot peppers and veggies. I want to watch some crappy TV and fall asleep with the remote in my hand. You two go."

After another five minutes of stating she was tired, Edward and Alice finally believed Bella and left.

The first thing Bella did was take her hot bath. She was tired. She added bubbles to the water and relaxed. After the water went cold and the bubbles fizzled out, Bella dried off, put a robe on and ordered her pizza. She found the remote control and found a cheesy reality show. She just had sat down when there was knock on the door. She quickly got up and retrieved her pizza. She took the box to the couch and sat down with her feet on the coffee table. She had just taken her first bite when there was another knock on the door.

"Coming. I swear if either one of you left your keys in here I'm going to- oh my god!" Bella said shocked as she looked at the man in front of her. It was the last person in the world she expected to see.

"No, not god, just me," he tried to joke with a bashful smile.

"Car- Car-Carlisle?" Bella asked as her voice began to crack. She watched him nod as she thought she was hallucinating his image. "What-what are you doing here?"

"I just ran into Edward and Alice. They gave me this room number. Could I-can we-can I come in?"

"Sure, um, well, come in," she told him as she tightened her belt on her robe.

Carlisle followed her back to the living room. She sat on the couch. She watched him stand the farthest point away from her in the room.

"How are you?" Carlisle whispered.

"Peachy." Bella sarcastically replied. "How are the kids?"

"They are all right. Peter misses you so much."

Bella took a breath in. She didn't want to cry. "You didn't let me say good bye. You didn't even tell me you were leaving."

"I know," Carlisle said facing the floor.

"Char-Charlotte and I were rebuilding our relationship and now she hates me."

"I don't think she hates you," Carlisle gently told her.

Nodding her head Bella looked at him. "Oh yes she does. She wrote a letter and put it in one of my boxes. She hates me." Before she realized it, Bella began to cry. She looked at Carlisle. "I know I wasn't around a lot because of Edward and what he was going through but I don't know what else I did to you. I know I should have been there more, but you just got up and left and didn't say anything to me about it. I hurt so much because of you Carlisle."

"I know. I realize I was wrong. I ran into Edward and we talked." Carlisle paused as he recalled his recent conversation with Edward.

Carlisle was just leaving a dinner with a former collage and heading back to his hotel room when he saw Edward for the second time that day. Previously he had seen Edward and Bella in the coffee shop where his heart broke. They looked happy and in love. She was obviously pregnant. He placed his hands on her stomach and beamed with happiness.

Now as his eyes found his former friend, he saw him but he was with another woman. Bella didn't deserve to be cheated on twice and especially from someone who was like a brother to her. After walking his friends out of the restaurant, Carlisle returned. He walked over to Edward's table and interrupted his dinner. As he approached the table, he couldn't help but notice how close Edward and the woman sat next to each other.

"Excuse me," Carlisle said as he interrupted their conversation.

"Carlisle, what are you doing here?"

"You," Carlisle began as he looked from Edward to the woman sitting next to him. "You have some nerve Edward."

"What are you talking about?"

"I know you are hurting, but this is absolutely unacceptable. How could you do this to her?"

"Do what to whom? What are you talking about? Nerve seems to be something you know nothing about."

"Excuse me?" Carlisle questioned.

"You know, I've called you countless times and Bella had tried calling you, your children. We emailed you and all of our attempts to get in touch with you have gone unanswered. She's well, it isn't my place to tell."

Worried, Carlisle looked at Edward. "Is she ill? Is she okay?"

"Do you really care?" Edward shouted as onlookers eyed him.

Alice tugged gently at his arm. "Edward, shhh, lower your voice."

"Your right, I'm sorry. Well Carlisle since you are now standing in front of me in the flesh, there is something I need to get off my chest. I considered you not only a mentor. Not only were you the person I admired the most and molded my career after, you were my friend. Someone I got to know and respect. I loved your children as if they were my own niece and nephew. When you told me you have feelings for Bella, the only thing I told you was I didn't want to see her hurt. She's-what is so funny?"

"You! You have the audacity to sit there and lecture me on everything that is good when you get interrupted by your mistress to keep your voice down."

"My what?" Edward asked confused.

"Oh no, you have the wrong idea," Alice said.

"I saw you this morning with Bella, at the coffee shop. You two looked cozy. She looked pregnant and you both looked happy." Carlisle explained as his voice began to trail. He coughed, gained his composure and continued. "Now I see you here with another woman."

Edward inhaled deeply. "You're not even close on this one Carlisle. I'd like to introduce you to Bella's boss and friend. We are here out to dinner on a, well, what I think is a date that was set up by Bella." Edward scrunched his nose in confusion and looked at Alice. "This is a date, right?"

Smiling and nodding, Alice looked back at Edward. "I guess it is, yea, we're on a date and I'm pretty sure Bella is behind this."

Shaking his head, Carlisle continued to question the situation. "But I saw you Edward. You kissed her and your hands were on her stomach. She, she's pregnant?"

"Yes she is," Edward honestly answered.

"With your baby I assume."

"What?" Edward laughed. "No, nope. As I've been telling you since I met you, I consider Bella my sister."

"Then how is she pregnant?" Carlisle questioned.

Shrugging his shoulders, Edward looked at his former friend. "It isn't my story to tell."

"But you two spend so much time together. You slept together and shared a bed."

"It's was during my rough patch."

"Right," Carlisle began. "It was after the affair."

Looking at Alice, Edward began to speak. "There is more to it than just that."

"Your wife cheated on you, you were depressed, Bella was there. What else is there to the story?"

Swallowing hard, Edward spoke softly. "I tried to kill myself."

"What? Edward-" Carlisle began in disbelief.

"In retrospect, it was the stupidest thing I could have done, I know, but Tanya and Jasper, they hurt me. They hurt me more in a way I didn't know how to deal with. I was dealing with it the only way I thought I knew how to."

"You tried to end your life?" Carlisle asked saddened by his friend's actions. "I had no idea Edward. Bella didn't say anything."

"She wouldn't have. My mom thought I when I came through I would be embarrassed of what I tried to do. I honestly don't care who knows it know because I got help and I got better. I'm still getting help, going to therapy. My mother thought she was doing the right thing and told people the stupid story of an allergic reaction to a medication. That wouldn't have landed me in a coma for days. My mom begged Bella not to say anything, which obviously she did not." Edward took a breath in. "I never thought you would leave her and I never thought that you would pack up overnight and just leave. I blamed myself for the demise of your relationship and I get scolded each time. Bella yells at me."

Carlisle pulled out the empty chair and sat in it. He shook his head. He was trying to absorb all of the new information. "So Bella, how is she? She looked happy."

"I haven't known Bella as long as either one of you but I can tell you she tried to be a good actress. She says one thing but it's the opposite. She smiles and says she is fine but we know she isn't. She is hurting."

"She's always been able to put up a good front," Edward added.

Silence fell over the table. Carlisle looks at Edward. He thinks he knows the answer he was about to ask. "And the baby?"

"You need to talk to her yourself if you want to know."

"I-I-I don't know how. My plane leaves first thing in the morning. I'm flying back home. She obviously isn't here now."

"She's in the hotel right next door," Edward told him.

"She-she won't talk to me, I know it," Carlisle sadly realized.

Huffing, Alice added her two sense. "I don't blame her. You treated her very poorly and you are an asshole."

"I beg your pardon!" Carlisle spoke up.

"You heard what I said. You are a complete, inconsiderate, non-caring, self-centered son of a bitch," Alice added.

"With all due respect Miss-"

"Brandon, Alice Brandon."

"Miss Brandon, you don't know a single thing about me."

"Dr. Cullen, you and I have never met before tonight however, through the actions and the way you have treated my friend I have reserved judgment on you. I know what you put Bella through and based on that, you are a glorified jerk. You knew she was in a tough place. You knew she was going through some things with Edward and instead of supporting her and just dealing with what was happening, you abandoned her, and her friend when they both needed you the most. Bella was trying to tell you some rather large news and what happened? You had already moved on."

"i-I-I-I-," Carlisle stuttered.

"Right, you chose not to hear her out. You over reacted and left, like a coward."

"I thought she was sleeping with Edward!" Carlisle said very honestly.

"Did you ever ask her about it? Did you notice how ill your friend was? Did he seem like he was shacking up with Bella? Did you attempt to help him or see if you could do something to help Bella? You could have talked to her about it before packing up to move to who knows where and changing all of your contact information. Instead when things got hard, you bailed. You abandoned her."

"I-I-I-I- oh shit, I did do that. I did over react, didn't I?" Carlisle realized.

"Yea, you did," Alice confirmed his thoughts confidently.

Alice took a breath and continued in a calmer tone. "Listen, from what Bella had said about your relationship, I don't really think you are all those names I said. I think you made a total assaholic move but you're not a bad guy. All three of you were dealt crappy cards and none of you really knew what you were doing. Do you know what you need to do now? You need to prove me right by going to her, now. She's just next door. She is the only one who can answer your questioned honestly."

Shaking his head, Carlisle looked at the woman sitting in front of him. "Alice, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why not? We," Alice said motioning to her and Edward, "are here and aren't heading back any time soon."

Edward raised his eyebrow and looked at Alice. "She's going to be pissed at us."

"Right, at first, but I think she would be more pissed if she knew we saw Carlisle and she knew he was this close and he didn't say anything," Alice rebutted.

Nodding, Edward looked from Alice to Carlisle. "I think she's right. I'll tell you one thing thought, if you hurt her any more-"

"No," Carlisle interrupted Edward. "No more hurting. Just talking, I promise."

"And what did you and Edward talk about?" Bella asked.

"You and me. I was an idiot who over reacted and flew off the handle. I met Alice too and she made some good points too," Carlisle calmly explained. "Edward told me he was hospitalized because of his attempted suicide."

Bella nodded sadly. "You knew that story didn't pan out. You knew there was more to it."

"Yes, I did and I should have pushed you more to talk to me. I understand why you listened to Esme, but I wish you didn't. I wish you would have talked to me more."

"So it's my fault you picked up and moved to god knows where?" Bella shouted.

"No! No, that's not what I meant at all. I just wished maybe we both would have been a bit more receptive." Slowly Carlisle began to speak. "I was wrong to move without telling you. I'm-"

"Don't you dare tell me you are sorry! I don't want to hear it."

"Bella I really don't know what else to say."

"Then don't say anything. There isn't a thing you can say or do to rectify what happened between us." Bella paused and stood up. She crossed her arms and looked at Carlisle. "You know I felt destroyed. Defeated even when Jacob left me. What you did to me Carlisle, with the picking up and moving without even a good bye let alone an explanation, it hurt twenty times more. At least Jacob was honest. I didn't know you nearly as long as I knew Jacob but I felt more for you. I loved you more than I did for my ex-husband and you killed that. I really felt that a piece of me died when I showed up to your empty house with my stuff in boxes on the porch. I thought I was going over to spend time and reconnect with you and the kids. I thought we could really talk. I was going to tell you all some fairly important news and what did I get instead? Adornment. You just left me and didn't have the balls to say bye. You didn't have the balls to argue with me, to fight for us. Instead you let me and my stuff out with the trash."

Carlisle wasn't quick to respond. He knew Bella was right. He knew no matter what the issue was between them, he should have talked to her instead of pack up. He feels heart broken and sick. Tears fell from his crystal blue eyes.

Biting her lip, Bella just looked at Carlisle. She shook as she held back her own stream of new tears. "I'm sorry if these words seemed harsh but it's been building inside of me for months."

Carlisle was silent and hesitant to speak at first. He finally softly spoke. "You're right Bella. I let my unjustified jealousy get in the way of good judgment. I was too insecure to do the right thing."

Sadly, Bella smiled. She walked towards the door. "I guess we covered it then. There isn't more to be said."

Carlisle got up on her heels. He didn't want their time to be over just yet. "How can you say that? There is so much more we need to talk about."

"Like what?"

"I-I-I don't know. Peter misses you like mad. How about your job and the….the…..the baby," he ventured to say quietly.

Bella took a breath in. "The job is great." She paused as she looked concerned. "Peter misses me?"

Nodding, Carlisle walked slowly back to the couch. "Yes. He was so mad at me when we moved. Honestly if he had a choice I think he would have chosen to stay with you. It took him almost a month to have an actual conversation with me. He used your cook books so often that he actually doesn't need them anymore. He has memorized them."

Bella smiled thinking about Peter. They held a special bond. "Is Charlotte well too?" She asked walked back towards Carlisle. She sat across from him on the couch.

"She is doing extremely well. She is happy. She's made a few good friends too. She just made honor roll."

Laughing, Bella looked at Carlisle. "You probably have one of those 'I love my honor roll child" bumper sticker on your car."

Returning her laughter, Carlisle nodded. "I would if I had a car."

"You don't have a car? How do you get to work?"

"I run, bike, take the subway."

Confused, Bella looked at Carlisle. "Subway?"

"Yes. It doesn't make a lot of sense to have a car in New York City for every day commuting."

Sadness filled Bella's heart. "New York City?"

Feeling equally as sad, Carlisle nodded his head. "Yes. I'm actually teaching for the semester at Columbia. I'm a substitute teacher since I started midway through the semester."

"Oh, I see. How is that going?"

"It's going well. I um, chose somewhere different for the kids. I have a really normal schedule. I don't teach night classes and I'm actually home before the kids are. I can help them with their homework and we have had fun exploring the city."

Nodding, Bella forced a smile to her face. "That's a good thing."

"It is," Carlisle replied. He looked at Bella as she looked away from him. Her look reminded him of how she was when he first met her. She looked so broken. This time the look was because of him. He noticed she is gently rubbing her stomach. "Are you okay?"

Snapping herself out of her daze, Bella looked up. "Yes, just a little heartburn."

"How far along are you?"

"Almost six months."

"Have you had an easy pregnancy?"

"Yes. I had some flu like symptoms and I was tired all the time. I just thought it was because of everything with Edward." She paused and looked at Carlisle. "Things between us weren't good. I chalked it up to stress. I found out right before you moved. I was going to tell you that night when you left."

Carlisle felt emotional again. He was the source of so much pain. He realized that he was wrong. "Do you know the sex?"

"No. I want to be surprised."

"Have you been alone for the whole thing?"

"Oh god no," Bella laughed. "I'm living with Edward again. He's been great. Alice has too and Esme oh my god Esme, she's-"

"In her glory?" Carlisle laughed. He used to remember when she would harass Edward about having kids with Tanya.

"Oh that she is! She and Alice are going crazy because I don't want to know what I'm having. They have been helping with the prep and the planning. The baby is healthy and growing nicely, that's all I'm worried about. That's all I need."

Whispering, Carlisle looked across to her. "It sounds like you have a good support system then."

"I do and I'm extremely grateful for them."

Taking another breath in, Carlisle began to speak again. "Listen, I'm only here until the morning, but could we go out and grab some dinner or dessert and just talk some more."

"I don't think that is a good idea," Bella answered honestly. Her heart felt like it was being stabbed a hundred times.

"Bella, please. We are just starting to clear the air. I-"

"No Carlisle, I don't want to."

Carlisle walked over to her and sat next to her. "But Bella-"

"No!" Bella shouted. She pushed over and looked at Carlisle. "I've put myself through enough heartache with you and I'm done. So we go out, have fun talking and the night ends and you know what happens? You get back on that plane tomorrow morning and you go back to this new life that you chose to build without me while I'm still here holding onto memories. I am done with that feeling. I will have reminder of you and our life and how good it was every day of my life. I'm done with the hurting."

"But I want to be part of your life, the baby's life. I want to be with you."

Shaking her head adamantly, Bella looked at him. The words that she was about to speak killed her. "Carlisle, I don't think we will ever be together again." She paused to try and stop herself from crying. "As for the baby, we can try and work something out. I don't know how but if you really want to be part of the baby's life, we will manage somehow. If Peter and Charlotte want to be part of the baby's life too let them. Don't force them."

Carlisle nodded. "So you wouldn't consider getting back together?"

"No," Bella simply said. "I'm not doing the long distance thing. I'm happy here. I'm successful at my job and I don't want to move from here. I did that once and when I needed someone in Arizona, no one was there for me. I'm home. I'm not moving. At the same time, now that you live three thousand miles away with your children, it isn't fair for me to demand you move back here. Whatever we had before Carlisle is gone. You didn't have faith in me. You had no trust in me, which is just as bad as breaking a trust."

Feeling a bit angry, Carlisle looked at Bella. "So you are penalizing me because I was stupid?"

"Oh my god, do you even hear yourself now? You are such an asshole." Bella stood up and walked towards the door again. "I want you to leave."

Carlisle sprinted over to her and shook his head. Once again he was wrong. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I-I-I-I just- I was wrong. I'm willing to admit to that. You will never know how truly sorry I am."

Bella looked at him and shook her head again. Once more, she tried to keep the tears at bay. "Maybe one day we will be able to be friends but there will never be anything more between the two of us. I'll always have an appreciation for you. You gave me a baby. I can't give you more than that. I opened up to you and I got screwed. I might have been wrong in the way that I was handling things with Edward, but I didn't know what else to do! I'm not doing it again. It's not just me I have to think about, it's the baby too."

"I understand. I really screwed things up."

Now speaking angry, Bella looked at him. "You did Carlisle, big time. You didn't care enough to just listen to me. I was going to tell you everything that night. About Edward and how he didn't have a reaction to the medication, the baby. Everything but you- never mind. I'm not beating a dead horse."

"Is-is it okay for Peter to contact you? Like I said he has really missed you. He wrote you letters that I never mailed."

"I would love to hear from Peter. I miss him so much. I miss Charlotte too. I actually really miss all of you."

"Can-can we keep in touch too? You know, for the baby? I'd like to be here for the delivery."

"Of course. You might have been a crappy boyfriend near the end of our relationship but you are an incredible father. I would never keep your child from you. No matter how angry I am with you I would never put our child in the middle of it."

"Could you send me ultra sound pictures too? I was kind of shocked at first but since I'm excited."

"Of course," Bella answered as she started to cry.

"Are you okay?" Carlisle kindly asked.

Wiping her eyes, Bella started. "I had it all figured out you know, how I was going to tell you and the kids about the baby. I had these shirts made for all of you. I couldn't wait to tell you all. I had a vision that once you got out of your shock, you'd pick me up, spin me around and kiss me. You'd kiss my stomach. Charlotte and Peter would roll their eyes like they all did when we were affectionate. I really was going to tell you, I wasn't trying to keep a secret. I called you and emailed you. You cut off ties with me." Bella stopped to ball. "Do you know how much that hurt? And now you're standing in front of me. Part of me wants to drag you into the bedroom and make up for lost time. I want to show you how much you still mean to me, even though I shouldn't feel that way. I want to make love to you and never let you leave me again. Another part of me wants to throw you out of the twenty third window and not look back! I might still love you but Carlisle I also still hate you. I hate you more than I could hate anyone else. I also hate myself because I still love you so much," Bella concluded as she shook and cried.

As he listened to her cry, Carlisle reminded quiet. He stood closely to her but not touching her. He began to talk to her quietly. "I know you don't want to hear these words but Bella I am truly sorry. I was too jealous and insecure of whatever your relationship is with Edward. He needed you and I was jealous of that. I know you think of him as your brother and I should have accepted that. He has a part of you that no one else can touch and I get that now."

"He's always been there for me. After my dad died. After my mom died. In middle school he beat up this boy Randall because he told me my parents would rather be dead than have a daughter like me. Edward saw me crying, went over to him, and punched him. He broke his nose. He almost got expelled but he explained to the principal what happened. He only got a three day suspension. After my mom died, I used to have these nightmares. He'd come into my room and just hold me. He'd stay awake with me. He never said anything. That first Christmas without my mom, I didn't get out of bed. I stayed in my room. Edward gave up his holiday with his family and stayed with me. Again, we didn't talk, he just stayed with me. When he proposed to Tanya I helped him pick out her ring. When they got married I was his witness. So yes, there is a part of me that Edward can only touch and this is why!"

"I always knew your relationship with him was stronger than your brothers. Edward always told me that."

Wiping her eyes, Bella spoke again. "We were always like that. He-" Bella's voice was interrupted by the sounds in the hallway. Moaning and kissing sounds were heard as well as Alice's giggles. Bella rolled her eyes as she pulled Carlisle to the room she was sharing with Edward. "Great," the front door opened as Bella and Carlisle made it to the room. "Hopefully they will take their party to Alice's room. God, I hope they don't have sex, I don't have headphones with me."

Carlisle couldn't help but laugh. "They've done this before?"

"Yes. Alice is my boss and has become a good friend. She was over the house hanging out. I fell asleep. I woke up to their cries of passion," Bella said rolling her eyes. "They don't' know I heard it. I refuse to say I knew anything about it."

""Oh god Edward, yes," Alice's voice echoed.

Rolling her eyes, Bella looked at Carlisle. "I hate this. They are two doors down and this loud."

"Come back with me to my room. It isn't far. Just a few hours. Give the lovebirds their go around and come back."

Shaking her head, Bella replied. "No thank you Carlisle. I mean-"

"Fuck Alice. I love you," Edward shouted. Bella hit her head against the wall.

"What? Did you say?" Alice squealed.

"I love you," Edward said. Kissing sounds were heard all the way back to the room Bella was in.

"It's going to be a long night," Bella whispered.

"I love you too Edward! Faster!" Alice replied.

"You can still come with me," Carlisle offered.

"Harder! Harder!" Alice mumbled.

Bella hit her head against the wall. She shook her head before looking at Carlisle. "Let's go," Bella said caving in. They left before she could change her mind.