I'm emotionally drained, but man are you going to get into Hiccup's head this chapter that is the start of Act II! This is one of the shortest chapters I've written for a while and it was longer, but I simply had to cut it for I really felt it would be too long and too heavy otherwise.

Also sorry I'm posting a bit late and that I haven't replied to all of your reviews! I have so much going on in life right now (I'm applying to study a semester abroad) and I'm entering my November depression, I HATE this month! I don't know how it is where you live, but in the southern parts of Sweden we rarely ever see the sun, nor do we have any snow as they do up north! The first time I saw the sun in over a week was today and that was only for a few hours! I wish with all of my heart that this winter won't be as the last one when we had no snow and about four sunny days for SIX months! SIX months! That's half the year!

Maybe I should buy D-vitamins? I have heard it can help and since my inspiration is at zero right now I might need it, otherwise these late updates will be regular until December... or March.

Now enough of my ranting (I'm ranting about November to everyone right now just so you know haha), I will let you get on with the chapter that deals with the aftermath of what happened in the end of Act I!

Laidyx: Oh my I have broken so many hearts with the last chapter I do feel very evil now! But I do have a plan to fix it, or at least someone in this story has and I bet all my money on that person! Yes it was the ice-castle scene! I think I will write it as a one-shot later on, so it might make an appearance. Now I hope your heart won't ache to much after this chapter, will it help if I say this is kind of the darkest place?

Guest: I'm so glad you liked the chapter! We are entering act II now so things are about to happen, especially since this act is going to be shorter than act I. ;)

14.

"It's Berk! My Gods we're finally home!" Astrid shouted from her place on Stormfly, the dragons and Fishlegs joining in with her cheer. Looking towards the horizon where Berk could be seen as a dark spot, Hiccup felt his stomach clench slightly, the sensation clashing with the happiness at being back.

For he really was happy to be home, he had missed Berk, it was just that no matter how hard he had tried he had been unable to rid himself of the feeling that he had left something behind. The emptiness that had been with him since he walked out of Elsa's study their last day in Arendelle lay over his shoulders like a dark heavy cloak and he didn't know how to get rid of it.

During their journey back to Berk Hiccup had tried to understand how he couldn't have noticed how his feelings towards Elsa had started to change. That he hadn't seen the signs made even less sense considering he had had a crush on Astrid for years, they had even courted for some time and been in as much in a relationship anyone could be without it being inappropriate.

In other words, he should've been able to recognize the signs and he probably would've if he hadn't so fiercely been telling himself that they had meant nothing at all. Another reason explanation why he had had such difficulty noticing his shifting feelings for Elsa was that they were so different than the feelings he had had for Astrid. Also, he had fallen for Elsa so much slower.

Astrid had been like fire who had consumed everything in her path. Once he had been old enough to notice girls at all she had captured his attention and he had been drawn to her like a moth was drawn to a flame. He had admired her from afar for a long time and when she finally noticed him he had made sure to keep getting closer to her. When they finally had started courting, she had fueled his Viking self and been like a burn that constantly triggered something within.

When they had ended their romantic relationship he had felt a sense of loss, but after some time he had also felt tiny amount of relief when he had started to feel like he could breathe a little easier. He had suddenly been free to make decisions based more on what he felt it was right and he had started to take the tribe in a new direction without feeling some kind of obligation towards Astrid to preserve the world she, just like his dad, represented.

This didn't mean he hadn't often missed what they had shared, but at the same time he had never felt ready to go back to what they had been either. The short months after his father's death having taken the toll on both of them and what was left was mainly memories of arguments neither one of them had ever won.

Elsa on the other hand hadn't been anything like fire, she had not swept in and consumed his entire world. Instead she had, without even trying she to, awoken his curiosity with the expressionless, controlled and perfect picture she had created to show the outside world. She had been so difficult to read that he had wanted to see if he could figure out how to get past her defenses, only for her to slowly creep her way past his own as well.

Just like the frost and ice she could control, she had at some point left a small mark within his heart that had slowly spread the more he had started to get to know the woman underneath the royal disguise.

The more she had let him in, the more fascinated he had become of the person that was hidden away and instead of loosing interest in her, he had found that he wanted to know even more about her. Her many layers had intrigued him and what had started as simply curiosity had turned into something else entirely when he had found Elsa to be someone he could connect to, someone who could understand what he had gone through in his youth.

During the long hours they had worked together, Hiccup had far too many times found himself just watching at her, studying the way she would become so completely concentrated on her work that the world seemed to disappear around her. He had also seen how her hair would constantly fall down in her face and each time it had done so, Hiccup had felt the urge to reach out and push it back so he could better see her face.

The feeling had started to appear after she had taken him up into the mountains and he for the first time, on an impulse, had reached out and pushed the lose strands behind her ear. The action had caused her to blush slightly while the usual cold tingles had rushed through his fingers.

Thinking back, he knew now that he had been a complete idiot for not connecting the dots earlier, but then again he hadn't wanted to. Hiccup had pretty much given up all thought of a relationship with anyone, he had too much going on his life and finding a woman to marry was at the very bottom on his list of priorities.

So how had she managed to go past his defenses? They didn't even come from the same world; in fact, they came from cultures so vastly different it was a miracle they hadn't clashed more during his stay in Arendelle. On top of this they both had duties beyond themselves that were their main priorities.

Yet despite this, they had been like two pieces that just fitted perfectly together. They had built their relationship on mutual trust, they had not been afraid to comfort each other or speak their minds.

What he had never told her though, no matter how much they had talked, was what had happened to his dad. He had had the opportunity to tell her many times but he had never been able to do it, for how could he ever look at her again after admitting he was a killer? What would he have done if she had looked at him with eyes full of pity while trying to tell him it wasn't his fault?

His greatest fear though, and the main reason he hadn't told her, had been that she would look at him with with accusing eyes and tell him that he was right, that he was a killer.

So he had never told her about his dad and only now did he wonder if he had done the right decision since Elsa, despite his fears, probably was the one person who was most likely to understand him.

Another decision he kept on questioning was his decision to draw back that last day in her study. That day, Hiccup had wanted to kiss her more than anything for she had been so extremely beautiful in that moment.

He could still see her clearly, her cheeks pink while her eyes had shone with laughter before turning so intense that they had pierced right into his soul. He had felt how her mere presence was slowly invading his senses until all he wanted was her, she had been the one who was drawing him in and he would have kissed her had she not brought them back to reality. A reality that was harsh, cruel and stung painfully.

They couldn't be together.

Hiccup could never live as a King confined within a castle and Elsa could never leave her country to live on Berk. Merging their countries was also out the question for the two cultures were far too different. They would only clash and slowly tear their countries apart.

So despite knowing all of this, why couldn't he easier fight the the feeling that he wanted nothing more than to turn Toothless around, go back to Arendelle and make up for the moment they had lost? Why was he constantly remembering how her fingertips had ghosted over his scar and how her eyes had told him that she wanted the same as him?

In reality, Hiccup knew why, he just didn't want to admit it to himself. He didn't want to admit that Elsa had not only left a mark in his heart, she had managed to capture a part of it and take it from him. It was the part that was now aching for her, the part he would have to silence until he had managed to reclaim it.

The deep sound of a horn suddenly broke through the air, the dragons roaring in response while Fishlegs and Astrid cheered once again. It was the horn signaling that the Chief was coming home, meaning his tribe had spotted them, and the closer they got to Berk Hiccup could see the mass of people who had gathered to greet them.

The moment his feet hit the ground, he was drawn into a strong hug by his mother who she told him how much she had missed him before drawing back while Gobber silenced the cheering crowed before announcing loudly that the Chief had come home, the crowd breaking out into new cheers.

Looking around at his people, the ones who trusted him and had come to accept him as their leader, Hiccup felt that despite the pain he had done right decision. He had his family, his friends and his tribe. No matter how hard it would be to fight his own personal feelings, this was where he belonged and that would have to be enough.

The weeks that followed Hiccup buried himself in work, not only because he hoped that constantly having something to do would keep his mind from going places he wanted to avoid like the plague, but also because the five weeks they had stayed in Arendelle had shown itself in the amount of work that had greeted him on his desk.

His tactic mostly worked very well, but no matter how hard he tried to forget her his heart constantly found a way to remind him about Elsa. Mostly he just missed her presence and often he found himself thinking about telling her something only to remember she wasn't there.

When it came to matters concerning the village he still talked to his mom, Gobber or the council just as he had done before, but he now missed talking to another ruler who had taken over at a young age and understood the troubles of maneuvering amongst those who were so much older.

What he didn't miss the slightest from Elsa's court though was that he didn't constantly have to evaluate every sentence or find a hidden meaning. The Vikings spoke their minds and they weren't trying to trick him or lure him into a trap like the nobility in Arendelle constantly tried to do.

When it came to matters concerning his own inventions and thoughts on the world however, it was a different matter. Once again, Hiccup was alone in his interest for unanswered questions that didn't involve sheep, dragons or weapons. Nor did the Vikings fully understand his ideas or his sarcastic humor.

In the beginning, Hiccup had been able to tell himself that the fact his mind was constantly wandering to Elsa was simply because he missed this part of her. Their easy interaction that was founded only in their friendship, so about three weeks after he had left Arendelle Hiccup had written her a letter which he had sent away with one of the trained Terrors.

He had even been able to tell himself that his longing for her response had nothing to do with the deeper feelings he had developed for her, at least until he actually had received her reply.

When it had arrived a little more than a week later, little Sharpshot arriving along with the terror Hiccup had sent, he had devoured every word she had written while warmth had spread within. Her letter had been wonderfully absent of her usually formal tone and he had been able to find the emotions between the lines. However, as soon it ended the memories that had washed over him had made it impossible for to deny that his feelings for her was still strong.

It had also made him realize that corresponding with her would help neither of them at all, so with a heavy heart he had only sent her a short response, knowing he would not see Sharpshot for a long time.

After all he no longer even belonged to Hiccup.

Just like she had promised, Elsa had come down to say goodbye to all of them before they left and somehow they had both been able to act like nothing had changed between them. They had all been joking around before Anna and Rapunzel had given all of them a big hug. Rapunzel had even told them that the next time they would hold a big event in Corona, she and Eugene would invite them to come.

There had been one moment though, right before they took off, when he and Elsa had gotten a moment alone. It had been when Elsa was saying goodbye to Toothless, giving his dragon one last hug, and the others weren't paying them any attention that she had turned to him and allowed the wall she had built to fall.

"I do hope you will have a safe flight." She had said, her eyes filled with warmth and concern.

"With all the food we have with us it will probably take a bit longer to get home but other than that we'll be fine." He had replied, happy when his words had managed to bring a small smile to her face while Sharpshot had come soaring through the sky and landed on Elsa's shoulder. His new favorite spot.

"Hey little guy, I will miss you too." She had told his small dragon with a sad smile while the little terror had stroked his cheek against hers. Seeing them interact, Hiccup had made an impulsive decision. The two had grown very close during their stay and he knew the little dragon would look after her when he couldn't.

"How about he stays here?" Hiccup had therefore asked her while Elsa had looked at him with huge eyes.

"But you said they live in packs, and he is yours." She had told him, the surprise clear in her voice.

"They do. but he had clearly chosen you and I know that's what ultimately is most important." Hiccup had told her, knowing that Sharpshot would want to stay. At his words, Sharpshot had tactically taken his other new favorite spot in her arms and Elsa had simply given in without arguing.

"If he wants to stay I would be happy to take care him. Thank you Hiccup." She had told him, her eyes having shown what neither of them could say.

Having been certain no one was watching, Hiccup had then reached out and caressed her cheek one last time, Elsa closing her eyes as she relaxed, before he had jumped up on Toothless and urged his friends that they needed to leave before dark. Knowing that if they didn't leave his resolve would fall.

Just as he had thought, Sharpshot didn't return again and the weeks kept on passing as the short summer on Berk started to shift into autumn. The shifting of the seasons almost mocking him, for with them he knew that he was changing into the man he had been before he left Berk to go to Arendelle.

He was giving his all to the village, he was sitting up late nights with his friends and he kept on working with the dragons. He acted as normal as he could, but the lighter side of him that he had rediscovered in Arendelle was once again dying away and felt even more out of his reach than it had done before.

Just like before, he also noticed that his mother, Gobber and Astrid noticed the changes in him, but his mother and Gobber mostly let him be. Astrid on the other hand had tried talking to him about it several times, but he hadn't been able to tell her that the reason he was struggling was because his heart wanted him to return to Arendelle, that wouldn't have been fair to her in any regard, especially since she more than once since their return had hinted that she was ready to start over and try again.

Each time she had done this, Hiccup had felt his heart clench in his chest, for he now knew he would no longer be able return her feelings. What made matters worse was that each time Hiccup had tried to tell her that things had changed, she would simply brush it off or change the subject into something else.

Why she seemed so determined not to listen was beyond him, but it did make him wonder if she was more aware of what had started to grow between him and Elsa than she had let on, after all he had noticed how Astrid had started to act more and more possessive towards him the longer they had stayed in Arendelle. It had almost been as if she wanted to make sure he and Elsa spent as little time together as possible.

Still, it was unusual for Astrid to let her emotions get the best of her. He remembered how she had acted when she had thought he had feelings for Heather. Sure she hadn't liked it, but then she had at least talked to him about it and given him reasons why she felt the way she did. Now she simply seemed determined to act as if Elsa didn't exist at all and that they suddenly, out of nowhere, were ready to get back together despite the fact they still hadn't worked out their problems.

Life was not all gloomy however. In fact, most of the time, he was alright and life kept on going forward. He even thought he would have been able to forget about his feelings for Elsa if it hadn't been for the fact that Fishlegs' stories had, since their return, turned Elsa and Arendelle into a topic of conversation that refused to disappear.

People would constantly keep asking Fishlegs questions about the foreign Queen and he was always happy to tell them everything they wanted to know. However, this meant the tribe rarely asked Hiccup anything at all about the subject so he couldn't really complain.

As it would turn out though, one night when they were all sitting outside around the fireplace almost three months after their return to Berk, he would not be able to escape questioning forever.

"I still can't believe you got to see it all, it sounds like something from a fairytale!" Ingrid, a young pretty woman whose family had moved to Berk a little more than a year ago, said from her spot next to Snotlout. The two had been courting for eight months and even though it was a slightly strange match, they worked very well together. Ingrid finding Snotlout's strange comments to be highly amusing.

"I don't know if fairytale would be the right way to describe it, but it sure was different." Astrid said with a small smile from her seat next to Hiccup. It had not been custom for her to sit next to him for almost a year, but since their return she once again always took a seat close to him.

"But everything you've told me about the food, the dresses, the dancing! Just think of it!" Ingrid replied, her eyes glittering as she looked at them.

"Ye should be careful thinking too much about a culture ye've never seen lass. Astrid is right when she says that the southerners are a very strange folk. I once remember meeting one of these southerners in my youth, she was a beautiful older woman with the strange habit of bending her knees when she greeted everyone and kiss them on their cheeks." Gobber said, shaking his head a little.

"Isn't that what they call curtsying? It's a way of greeting isn't it?" Ingrid asked them, Astrid nodding her head. "Did they teach you so you can teach me?" At her question, Hiccup and Fishlegs couldn't help to laugh while Astrid sent them both a glare.

"I'm sorry Ingrid, but I don't think Astrid is the right one to ask." Hiccup said, noticing how his mother and Gobber shared a look on the side of the fire while he realized that it was the first time he had really said anything about their stay in Arendelle that hadn't been the answer to a direct question.

"But you all liked it there right? I mean you stayed for so long." Ingrid asked, looking around eagerly at them.

"We've already told you we found the place to be alright." Astrid shrugged, Fishlegs sending her a look.

"It was more than alright Astrid, even you admitted it. But of course we wouldn't have stayed so long if not Hiccup and Queen Elsa had started working on one of his ideas. What was it you two were trying to develop again Hiccup?" Fishlegs said, completely oblivious to the fact that Hiccup had tensed up slightly.

"It's quite difficult to explain." He only said, everyone seemingly accepting the answer while Astrid got a small frown on her face.

"It might've been, but the Queen had no problem keeping up. I saw you two work and even though I tried to understand what you talked about I never really understood everything you said about masses and numbers." Fishlegs replied, Hiccup starting to wonder why he hadn't just walked off the moment Arendelle had been brought into the conversation.

"That must've been a pretty nice change for ye Hiccup, ye know I never understood yer talk about all that stuff either." Gobber said, looking at Hiccup with calculating eyes and he could see that same look was on his mother's face. It bothered him greatly since he knew that if anyone could expose the fact that he was trying to hide something, it would be Gobber and his mom.

What bothered him even more though was the fact that a picture of Elsa sitting next to him, her face full of concentration as she pushed back her hair, entered his mind and he felt how his fingers started to tingle. It had been nearly two weeks since the felt it the last time and he had hoped it was about to pass.

"Considering the fair amount of mead you've consumed in your life perhaps that's not so strange." Hiccup still managed to tell his old mentor with a grin.

"That's true, but I'd like to argue it has sharpened my senses, saved me from a falling hammer once." Gobber laughed and Hiccup was glad when Ingrid spoke up once more, hoping he it meant would be able to escape any more questions.

"Think about how it would be to meet a real Queen, what I wouldn't do to have gone with you!" She said, Snotlout putting his arm around her.

"You beat any Queen in the entire world, all times around." He told her, Ingrid blushing a little but also pushing his arm away.

"Not if we're to believe Fishlegs." She answered, looking over at the blond Viking with glittering eyes while Fishlegs turned a little red in the face, Gobber chuckling.

"I don't think anyone on Berk can doubt that the Queen must've been a sight for sore eyes by now. Saying a woman is like the moon and the stars is high praise from any Viking." Gobber said.

"Even if she was, no woman beats my Ingrid Floueson! She's like the moon, the stars and the sun!" Snotlout said and this time Ingrid allowed his arm to stay draped around her shoulders as she gave him a kiss on the cheek.

"At the same time, no one can deny that you're slightly biased, though your lady is a fair beauty." Eret spoke up, winking at Ingrid who blushed while Snotlout turned red for another reason. "And I believe the same goes for Fishlegs as well. The only one I haven't heard say anything on the subject is our Chief. So what do you say about the Queen's beauty, Hiccup? It feels like you're the one who can solve this matter once and for all." He said, turning to Hiccup who felt how the emotions began raging within.

Why had he been stupid enough to believe the danger was over? He knew Eret had meant no harm with his question at all, but the man didn't know that his words had brought forward the memories of Elsa Hiccup was trying so hard to forget. They swirled around in his mind as he tried to figure out how he could describe her without giving himself away.

He couldn't tell them that her hair shone like silver in the moonlight or how it made her pale skim seem to glimmer. Nor could he tell them of how her eyes could hold more warmth and affection than any other person he had met. He couldn't describe how she seemed to float over the ground when she walked or how she could demand the attention of a whole room with just her presence.

He could most defiantly never tell them that her skin was so cold that it clashed with his own and sent strange but pleasurable tingles through him that affected him in a way nothing had before. Nor could he ever say that her outer beauty was nothing compered to the intelligent, loving and scarred woman within.

Suddenly the ache in his heart was more painful than it had been ever before, the feelings he had managed to push away returning with full force, and while he only wanted to be alone, he knew had to say something.

"Queen Elsa is very beautiful, but I think it's up to everyone to decide how much of an impact they think she has had on them." He therefore said simply, trying to sound as neutral as he could while thinking about an excuse to leave.

"That must be the most boring answer ever given by human kind; I mean I can describe the beauty of my maze better than that." Tuffnut said, Ruffnut looking at him.

"Really? Do it!" She replied with a grin.

"Oh let's see, it's a beauty, it's beautiful and the most beautiful maze ever made." Tuffnut said, Ruffnut looking slightly impressed while the rest of the group stared at the pair for a second before Ingrid suddenly turned to Hiccup again.

"Wait! Don't you have any drawings of the Queen? That way we could all see her and we could say what we think!" She exclaimed, Hiccup feeling a small rush of panic. Now he really needed to get out of here.

"Uhm… You know I don't know where I've put my sketch book, I think I left it on the edge when I was there last time, but I can show you another time." He said, rising from his seat, trying to ignore his mother's piercing eyes from the other side of the fire. "Now I need to go look for Toothless, you all know that one need to take care of the dragon." He said a little awkwardly, the others frowning a little, but so used to his strange reasons that they really didn't think much about it.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Astrid asked, Hiccup sending her a small forced smile, his heart aching when he looked into her blue eyes and only a lighter pair flashed through his mind.

"No need, but thank you." He said, walking away from the group to find Toothless who turned out to still be sleeping on the roof of Hiccup's house like he had done earlier that evening. Feeling the emotional state his rider was in, Toothless jumped down from the roof immediately when he approached and looked at him with concerned eyes while Hiccup leaned his forehead against his side.

"I just miss her bud." Hiccup told his best friend who cooed something softly. "Yes, I know you miss her too." He answered, a picture of Elsa hugging Toothless after their first flight entering his mind. Her cheeks had been flushed then as well and he remembered the warm smile on her face. It was the first time he had fully understood how beautiful she was underneath the emotionless face she showed the world.

"Let's get out of here, bud." Hiccup said, hearing how strangled he sounded when he spoke and jumped up into the saddle while it almost felt like the air was pressing in around him. With one powerful beat of his wings Toothless lifted into the cold night air while Hiccup gave a scream of frustration over the fact that he seemed unable to win the battle against his turbulent emotions.

For a moment, he envisioned how he turned Toothless around and went after her. That, when he found her, he would take her in his arms and breathe in her scent of mint, cold and snow. He would tell her that he had been wrong, that it was much worse wondering what they could have become than not knowing at all. He would tell her that the constant questions were tearing him apart and that he wanted them to try and see if they somehow could make it work.

But that was not the real world and he couldn't leave. When he returned to Berk the hope that things could've been different would have to end. He would have to work even harder to try and forget her, even though he knew it was useless. The Snow Queen had taken a hold of his heart and as long as he didn't know if she was still returning his feelings, and if those feelings could've turned into love, he would never be able to let her go.

I am really in my dark place now haha! And still no hint on how this is going to be resolved. If Hiccup just wasn't so stubborn! Still, I cant help feel for him, the pain of wondering and a aching heart is more painful than almost anything! Do you feel the same? Send your review and tell me what you thought, you guys keep giving the fuel to write right now!

Until next time!
/Lysistrate