Chapter 17

"Isn't 'united fronts' what got you into this in the first place?"

"Howard!"

"Just trying to lighten the mood." Howard had the decency to look sheepish for his tasteless joke. Fortunately, Cera could appreciate his humor and laughed long and hard.

Sheldon had just descended the stairs to the fourth floor. It had been a peaceful, productive morning, for which he had been grateful. The last few days, or weeks even, had been very dramatic and it was having a negative effect on his digestive system and his REM cycle. He was weary and had thought perhaps some time on the roof away from others might help clear his head. The change in scenery allowed him the clarity to finalize his draft of 3-D chess.

Sheldon paused at his door. Despite his efforts, the leap forward in chess was the only positive he could see. He felt he was in a constant state of turmoil. He had stalled at work. His best friend/roommate, Leonard was consorting with an obnoxious woman who had made his own home unbearable. Since she was Raj's sister, he was feeling a strain in that relationship, too. This had led to a separation from Penny. While he and Amy had decided on a reset, he was afraid the damage done would be irreparable. Even his treasured acquaintance had been oddly absent all weekend, despite knowing where Bernadette and Raj were. Worst of all was the reappearance of Olivia. She had the potential to do the most damage in unraveling the tight control he had held for the last ten years.

His thoughts were disrupted as he stared at his door. "Hey, Moon Pie?"

"Penny, how many times do I have to tell you-."

"Yeah, yeah, only Meemaw can call you Moon Pie. It's too early; I need coffee."

"Penny, you recall, I have coffee in my apartment, do you not?"

"You know I'm not wanted there." Penny stepped toward the stairwell.

"Very well, then." Before Sheldon could reach his for his doorknob Penny called after him again.

"Hey Sheldon, are you ok?" It had concerned Penny that Sheldon hadn't heard her exit her apartment and didn't seem to be moving.

"I have a master's degree and two PhDs. Of course I'm ok."

After a moment of studying Sheldon, Penny shook her head. "Nope, I'm not buying it."

"I hadn't suggested you purchase anything."

Penny rolled her eyes, "I talked to Amy. Is that what's bothering you?"

"If you spoke with Amy, you know the issue has been resolved." Sheldon wondered once again, if these women could keep nothing to themselves.

"You don't seem resolved Sheldon. You know you can talk to me, right? Come on." She gestured him back into her apartment.

"I wouldn't want to come between you and your coffee." After a hard look from Penny he agreed. "Oh, alright."

Sheldon entered and gingerly perched on her couch among her collection of clothing, shoes and various other random objects. He wasn't certain what Penny wanted from him, but he feared, it may have something to do with his and Amy's resolution, or worse.

"OK, so Amy couldn't tell me any details, because she didn't really remember, but I know she gave you a kiss, you want to pretend it didn't happen?" Penny settled on the chair nearby.

"We can blame her lack of memory, on the same substance as the uninvited advance on my lips. I am not pretending it didn't happen. We merely made the decision it should have no bearing on the established parameters of our association, nor should it happen again." Sheldon noticed an aroma. It was familiar.

"Well, just because she was drunk doesn't mean she didn't mean it. And you can always unestablish parameters."

"Unesatblish? Penny if one 'unestablishes' parameters, as you so blithely suggest, boundaries will break down, there will be no guidelines to govern associations, anarchy and darkness will descend on currently well working systems." Sheldon was still aware of the smell that he had now determined was emanating from Penny. It was a comfortable smell, but it was out of place.

"You're the only one that needs those boundaries. You've been doing so good relaxing them so far. I mean you went dancing with us this weekend. It's not that far a step between what you have with Amy and her being your girlfriend. The kiss wasn't that bad, was it?"

"It was a vast improvement over the assault I received from Beverly Hofstader. A kiss from yet another woman, who became inebriated under your influence. Penny do you smell like… citrus?"

"Huh? Yeah, its vanilla, lime body scrub, Cera made it. So, you're blaming me? I'm not the one being all… kissable, to drunk… smart women. Amy was an improvement though, you said so yourself. So why don't you want to do it again?"

Of course, he was smelling Olivia. Between the limes she ate, drank and cleaned with she always smelled faintly of limes. Though lately it seemed to have picked up the tinge of alcohol from the hand sanitizer. He was irritated with himself for finding the fragrance soothing. He was exasperated that Olivia had forced that scent on him, through Penny.

"Sheldon?" Drat, Olivia had distracted him-again.

"Oh, firstly, relationships of the romantic nature are distracting and a danger to maximum efficiency. Not to mention relationships of that sort tend to require a physicality that can be quite distasteful.

"Secondly, I was under the impression that Amy did not harbor such notions towards myself. She tried an experiment, months ago, that involved unwanted contact that she followed up with a negative reaction. That response lead me to believe I was unacceptable as her mate, I found that acceptable.

"And finally, in the realm of physicality Amy is drawn to the likes of your Neanderthal friend, Zack. I don't make her go 'Hoo' so why has she decided to instigate such an action now?

Why do you women always need to change? They can go from being intelligent and logical one moment and the next demanding, and emotional?"

"Is Amy being emotional? Wait, who else was logical and then got emotional? Have you been having more grad students come on to you?"

"Don't be silly, I hardly consider them intelligent."

"Then what are you talking about? You said women. That implies more than one."

"I've implied nothing. I thought that, against my better judgment, we were discussing, Amy Farrah Fowler kissing me."

"No, no, there's something else, I can tell."

"No, Amy didn't do anything else. Unless of course you are referring to her vomiting, which, I'd rather you not."

"Then it's someone else. Sheldon, have you met someone else?"

"Penny, I have met many people in my thirty-one years."

"No, no. Tell me you don't know a logical woman who became emotional…that isn't Amy." Penny wanted to watch and see if he twitched, he was hiding something, and she knew it.

"Really Penny? I have important work to do." Sheldon rose from the couch.

"You know, you're leaving gives away just as much, as your twitch."

"No, it doesn't." Sheldon wouldn't turn to face her.

"This must've been big if you're trying so hard to hide it." Penny wondered how much he would give away, so she decided to push.

"Penny, my personal affairs are none of your concern."

"No, but you are. If something is bothering you, it concerns me…Was this recent?"

"Penny," Sheldon turned for another protest.

"So that's a no. Was it before you lived with Leonard?" She really didn't know one way or the other, but she tried to be convincing.

Sheldon fixed her with a glare before heading back to the door. "Just…leave it alone."

"The more irritated you get, the better I can tell. I can play this guessing game all day…Unless you wanna tell me about it. Of course I can always fill in the gaps by myself. You had a torrid affair…with…a professor….before moving here."

Sheldon gave an amused huff, then glared.

"So that's a yes to before you lived in Pasadena, no to the professor. This must have been a big thing. If it wasn't you would be so defensive about it."

"That's just absurd. There is no way you could infer such a thing. I've done nothing!" He wondered if she had detected his distress over Olivia in the last few weeks. Sheldon was pretty certain Penny couldn't read his body language, but one could never can tell when it came to her.

"So it was a big deal. Did you have a high school or I guess, college sweetheart Sheldon? Did you…go all the way?" Penny taunted.

"Honestly Penny, I wouldn't have had time, or inclination for such a ridiculous notion then."

"But you did, after that?"

"A gentleman doesn't kiss and tell."

Penny was merely guessing, but he was responding! Oh, this was getting good. How had she never tried this on him before? "No, and I wouldn't expect you to."

"Thank you, Penny." Sheldon sighed, relieved.

So if he had the inclination after college and didn't want to kiss and tell, there was someone Penny reasoned. She just couldn't resist getting some additional info. "So, not a professor and not a sweetheart, what did you take out an ad in the paper for someone to experiment on?"

"I thought you were done with this line of questioning." After several moments of Penny staring him down, he realized she wouldn't relent. "No….She was a female I was previously acquainted with. We frequently went on outings to movies or the bookstore. There were even occasions she attended Sunday dinner with my family."

"She was your friend? I didn't think you had any of those before Leonard."

Sheldon looked affronted, "I…had not considered her as such…before, I really hadn't considered having anyone filling such a position in my life, but she seems to have fit that definition."

"Did she think you were friends?" Had he really been so clueless as to not realize he had friends? What kind of person wanted to be friends with him then, anyway? Penny was sure he was probably just weirder when he was younger.

"She did refer to us in that manner, on occasion."

"So you, wouldn't call her friend. Was it 'cause she wouldn't fill out the paperwork? And she still…"

"Still what?"

"I don't know, you tell me. Hug, make out, coitus?"

Sheldon felt heat flood his face and knew he was blushing. Penny's facial expression shifted and thought maybe it meant she could see it, too. He just hoped her interpretations of his body language had all been a hoax.

"Holy crap on a cracker, Sheldon. You had me explain friends with benefits and you had already had one?!"

Sheldon looked offended, "Oh, that was different, I just told you, she wasn't my friend."

"And yet she slept with you. Was she, I don't know, desperate, or easy, or crazy?"

"I'm not certain what she would be desperate for. If you are referring to the ease at which she entered into a coital relationship, she was not. I was her first coital partner. And she's not crazy…though she did use the word dysfunctional, frequently."

"Sheldon that's…huge. I didn't think you…" Penny was astounded that Sheldon just confirmed he'd had coitus. And taken someone's virginity. It also sounded as though he was claiming she was sort of, normal.

"Didn't think I, what? Was a man?"

"Well, no, I mean. I didn't think you'd…do something so unsanitary."

"Well, it's not something to be repeated."

"Huh. What kind of woman catches Sheldon Cooper's eye?"

"She was…" Sheldon had no words to describe Olivia, there were many things about her that had impressed him, but he was now unsure if any of it were true.

"She was what? You're not uncomfortable are you?" Penny laughed at turning the tables on him. He never seemed to mind discussing other people's sex lives.

"No. Why would I be uncomfortable?" Sheldon was uncertain what details Penny wanted and he was reluctant to give any. However Penny seemed to have a certain amount of distress she needed to cause him before letting him leave.

"She was low in stature, wore glasses, and had brown hair." Sheldon blurted quickly "Is that enough?" He rose to leave, yet again.

"So, she…was like Amy."

He hadn't thought of that. It took him a moment to make a further comparison. There were similarities, but most of those things seemed to have been superficial things that had all but disappeared. While Olivia did play the Periodic Table game with him, he doubted she would play counterfactuals. He doubted Amy would enjoy The Comic Center, but Olivia would go. Neither of them would really play video games. He figured a summation wouldn't hurt.

"Not exactly, no. I doubt her IQ rivaled Amy, though she never would tell me. She was always dressed up, but unlike Amy, she seemed to favor trendier fashions and bright colors. She kept her hair very short and neat. She was more exuberant in mannerism and seemed to enjoy a time of play as much as she liked working, though she did work long, hard hours."

"She sounds…nice Sheldon, what was wrong with her?"

"She interfered with my endeavor to obtain my second doctorate and my Nobel. She was distracting, became overly emotional, she made an erroneous claim of love."

"Oh, wow, she dropped, the L bomb. And you…didn't?"

"Of course not. Love is merely a figment of imagination weaved together with the chemicals released during coitus."

"So you just…tried coitus with her and didn't like it, huh?"

"Well, it was revolting, messy and unsanitary. It is also distracting and caused artificial attachments."

"Oh sweetie, I'm sorry you didn't like it. I guess sex just isn't for everybody. It sucks it messed up, your, uh, your acquaintance? But I did tell you, not everybody can handle that." What did you call a non-friend that you slept with and didn't enjoy? Penny didn't know. No wonder the poor guy avoided relationships.

Sheldon shook his head. "She had been quite rational prior to that. While the coitus itself was pleasurable, the arrangement was never as practical as it could have been. Did I mention how unclean it was? On more than one occasion she claimed that she was being affected emotionally and suggested we cease. Thankfully, by the time she had gotten so emotionally irrational, as to confess love to me, she also ceased our arrangement. I had grown quiet uncomfortable with our rendezvouses."

"So you…did…like it? So, did she dump you because you couldn't return her feelings, 'cause that happens a lot?"

"I was not dumped. The experiment had merely run its course. Her assertion that I used her as she became a teary, emotional mess made me realize I should have ended it sooner."

"While I know these things usually end bad, please tell me you didn't call her an experiment to her face."

"Badly. Things end badly. Of course I did. We always strived for full disclosure on the status of our couplings."

"Sheldon, did you tell her…all your thoughts on sex with her?"

"Seeing as how she lacked the ability to read minds, there was no other way for her to obtain that information."

"There are some bits of information you keep to yourself."

"Well, I didn't want to lie to her. You know I'm a terrible liar anyway."

"That's an awful way to treat someone who loves you. You didn't have to tell her a hurtful, pointless truth."

"You didn't return the sentiment to Leonard."

"No, I didn't. But I, at least, took it as a compliment. So I said thank you, not you're gross and then dump him. People are vulnerable when they say that!"

"But you did break up with him, Penny."

"Yeah, later on, because he couldn't just give me time or space to figure my feelings out."

"You mean because of Wil Wheaton."

"I think…he just sped up the process. I might have grown to love Leonard, without Wil, but what I've seen since, I think I'm realizing we couldn't work together."

"So you won't be getting back together with Leonard? Because Priya, really, is distasteful."

"I don't think so, sweetie. I think maybe, Leonard's love for me isn't as deep for me as I needed. He couldn't even be patient and wait for my feelings to catch up. And even in the last few weeks he hasn't been man enough to tell me to not hang around, and he lets Priya walk over him. I've come to see, other people's feelings about me and Leonard or anyone's feelings on Priya aren't really reasons for a relationship. It just has to be about what's best for me…and him. Even if it's not the easiest."

"Oh, well it was worth a try."

Penny chuckled at him "Sure. So you never did tell me what was bothering you. Is it because you're afraid Amy might turn out like…I don't remember her name?"

"I didn't tell you her name because it doesn't matter. I don't think Amy could turn out like…my past experience. She's a far more sensible and reliable woman. Thank you for reminding me of that."

Penny didn't remember doing any such thing, but if Sheldon felt better, "Oh, uh, you're welcome."

The girl had been a source of amazement to Howard. Merritt had come home all smiles and was genuinely happy to meet another one of Miss Penny's friends. She had Sheldon's hair color and nose. Her blue eyes, he supposed could have come from either parent, but her smile was all Cera. Though she was thin and gangly like Sheldon he hoped for her sake, she turned out more like Missy.

Merritt asked no less than 50 questions- Are you married? Do you have kids, I can play with? What's your job? Do you like it? Do you think there are aliens in space? Do you know why solar power is inefficient? Among others. She seemed genuinely interested in the work he did for JPL. When he informed her he wasn't a doctor like her mother, her response brought him up short.

"What's it matter? Don't you like what you do?"

Howard thought for a moment and smiled as he answered honestly. "Yeah, I do…so I guess what you call me isn't that big of a deal."

He left Cera and Merritt that evening feeling better about himself than he had in a while. He couldn't believe Cera had been with Sheldon. He could believe Merritt came from him. While part of him wanted to call Raj or Bernie with this juicy bit of news, he wasn't going to disrespect either of them with something so…childish.

"Howie? What are you thinking about over there?" Bernadette turned and look at him from the driver's seat.

"I, uh, Do you think me and the guys are...toxic?"

"What do you mean, Howie?"

"I was talking to someone this week about the people you surround yourself with and how that affects behavior. Do you think we're bad?"

"Well, sometimes you aren't the friendliest to each other. Usually, it's childish, but sometimes it's just mean. I thought that was just what competitive guys did, though."

"But, shouldn't buddies be more helpful? I mean, I know sometimes, I say things, I am really trying to cut deep, you know. But only because they do it to me."

"Are you upset with them? Where is all this coming from?" Bernadette looked puzzled.

"Sometimes I feel like they see me as you know, less because of my degree. It's constantly pointed out to me the only person lower than me is Penny and she's pretty happy doing her own thing. I was reminded recently that being happy with what I do was more important than credentials."

"I'm glad to hear you feeling that way. I always admired how you could just throw yourself into your work, like it was fun. Sometimes, I am worried they are too hard on you, though, I guess we can all be a little critical at times."

"Yeah…Look, Bernie I've had a great evening with you, but uh, I kinda wanted to stay home with Ma, tonight."

Bernadette gave Howard a concerned look, "Is everything ok?"

"Yeah, it's just something's...come up and I just...need to…be with her."

"O-OK, just call me if you need anything."

"While I do wish that it had a better grade, I haven't been able to find one otherwise. I suppose it can't hurt to look it over."

"I know you don't usually go as low as 6.5, but I thought you might want to check it out yourself, but you need to do it now."

"Thank you for alerting me, Stewart. I'll be there as soon as I can." Sheldon slid his phone back in his pocket with a big grin on his face. He might finally re-acquire an issue that was lost to him when Tanja sat on it creasing the fragile antique paper. Detective comics #141, The Gallery of Public Heros.

Sheldon could hear the radio playing in Penny's apartment verifying that she was indeed home. Good, he thought, she should have no problem giving him a ride. Actually, he would be doing the entire floor a favor by getting the music to cease.

"It's open" he heard from the other side of the door.

"I need a ride to The Comic- Oh," catching sight of Cera, "never mind." She was seated on the couch turned to Penny, who was standing in front of her bar.

"Hey Moonpie, Cera was just working with me on…compression?"

"Vocal compression." Cera's dirty blonde hair was concealing her from Sheldon though he could see the neck of her guitar on the left.

"Yeah, that, so that I can sing with more emotion."

It was a surprise to Sheldon that Cera was actually teaching Penny something. Not because she lacked the ability to instruct others, but because he had never imagined her actually having knowledgeability in this area. Taking her in, he considered forgoing Batman, a 6.5 really wasn't anywhere near mint, but before Sheldon could back out of the trip, Cera spoke up.

"It's ok, we've been working for a while. We could go, I'll sit in the back you can have the front."

It took Sheldon a moment to come to a decision, "Well, Of course I can."

Cera drew a heavy breath as Penny spoke up, "Are you ready to go now or do you need to grab anything?"

"Just allow me to retrieve my wallet and keys and I will be ready."

"K" Sheldon heard as he walked back to 4A. He gathered his wallet and keys, then considered protection for his new prize. It was raining so taking his messenger bag was imperative. He also packed several plastic sleeves to wrap and rewrap his book.

He took several deep breaths, gathered all of his conflicting thoughts and the emotions that were trying to burst forth and pushed them down. It wasn't working as well as it once did. He shifted his focus to something logical and concrete. Science. He considered the uncertainty principle. That seemed apropos at the moment. He applied Schrödinger's equation to Planck's constant. By the time he had figured in Heisenberg's principle, he was feeling much better.

Focusing on his goal of Batman #93, Sheldon stepped across the hall to face Olivia, once again.

As they settled in the car, Cera leaned forward to speak to Penny. Sheldon tensed and imagined his entire ride being filled with Cera's breath on his neck, her hair tickling his cheek and being wrapped in her fragrance.

"No! This isn't going to work. You have to switch with me." Sheldon jumped out.

"What?" "Huh?" The ladies were confused.

"You want us to switch in the rain?"

"Sheldon, you never sit in the back, what's going on?"

"I don't think I can bare an entire ride with her breathing on me."

"It's, uh, fine" Cera climbed out of the car doing her best to hide the tears that were forming in her eyes. She did her best to make this situation easier. Penny may have been confused, but Cera was well aware he found her repellent.

After rearranging, they finally set off. Penny hadn't even pulled out of the parking lot when Sheldon's eyes were drawn to Penny's check engine light.

"Why are we not riding in Ol-,uh, Cera's, more reliable vehicle?"

"Oh, I don't drive in the rain if I can help it. You wouldn't be able to put me in the back seat if we did, anyhow."

"You don't? Then how did you get here." This was new to Sheldon, Cera had never displayed an issue with driving in the rain before.

"I got a cab."

Penny laughed, "Well, I hope you used a crap load of hand sanitizer. You can't be too careful, you know."

"I did, thank you for looking out for me." Having not been present for Sheldon's trip in a cab the joke was lost on Cera, but Sheldon picked up on Penny's mocking. He was glad Cera hadn't joined in.

After a few quiet moments, the silence was broken by Penny.

"Oh you'll never guess, or maybe you will, but Bernadette was telling me that Howard apparently has been acting kinda-"

"Hey, Penny." Cera softly broke into Penny's oration.

"Uh, yeah?"

"Exposing other's secrets are hurtful. As is the warping of truth in gossip. The words often hurt people and damage relationships. Friends don't hurt each other purposefully. My family spent a lot of time being victims of scandal and rumors. My parents were degraded for their addiction; it was a sensation when mom gained weight when overcoming those addictions. They were relentless when my brother died, so much so that my parents decided Europe was a better place to grieve. So I really do not enjoy knowing the intimate affairs of those that don't tell me first hand themselves. Nor do I share my own."

"Oh, I didn't think about that. I'm sorry. This is a different brother than the one I met right? What happened to him?"

"That was Braden. Galen, his twin was lost to us. It was complications from a car accident." Cera stared out the window, trying to get a grip on her thoughts.

"I'm so freakin', sorry. For...all...of it." Penny was overwhelmed with sympathy for her friend.

"Nothing to be done about it now, just think first next time. You really owe the apology to Bernadette and Howard. And I do hope you handle anything I share with you much more carefully. The last bit of fluff from your group that floated by my ears troubled me, until I realized it was merely a fairy tale told for amusement… But perhaps I'm the only one that could refute the details."

"Uh, yeah, I hate when people gossip lies."

"It was merely an experiment in gossip meme." Sheldon murmured. He hadn't considered the fall out of Amy and his experiment. At that moment he only wanted a surprising and compelling factoid that would spread quickly. He never considered his pseudo-coitus with Amy might reach Oli- Cera's ears. Nor did he think Amy would give her own weak and inexperienced explanation. Olivia was the only one that knew that he was anything but aloof.

"Perhaps the next time you plan an experiment you should have a fully developed and executable conclusion before you begin." Cera stayed focused out the window.

"Yeah, Sheldon." Penny laughed, mock-glaring at Sheldon in the rearview mirror, as they pulled into the comic book store.

"I'll only be a minute if you don't mind waiting." Sheldon needed to put some space between the ladies and himself. He had just acquired quite a bit of new data and needed to process.

"Actually, if Penny doesn't mind I think I'll go in, too. I need to grab something for Merritt." The Comic Center didn't look very busy and with the rain it wasn't likely to get that way. Cera thought this might be a good time to talk to Sheldon.

Sheldon walked in searching for Stewart with Cera and Penny trailing behind him. From what he could see there were only two other customers. Unfortunately, one of them was Wil Wheaton, the other man he didn't know, but had seen a few times. He hoped to ignore them, but before he could find Stewart, he heard Cera call to them.

In his peripheral he could see Cera embrace both men. Then she remained linked with the shorter man with dark shaggy hair, whom she called Elliot. Sheldon tried to ignore them, but his Vulcan hearing gave him a front row seat to the conversation. The comic being laid in front of him startled him from his thoughts and momentarily distracted him from the conversation behind him.

After he donned his protective gloves and began inspecting the comic, his hearing drifted back to the conversation. He learned 'Merritt' was in gymnastics for the evening, it was surprising Cera was out in the rain, and that Elliot played in a band with her and Zack. Apparently, Penny was acquainted with Elliot as well.

"Zack, you mean Zack Johnson? He plays an instrument?" Sheldon heard Penny's voice go up. Cera was friends with his acquaintance, Zack, too? Was there no one she wouldn't pull into her orbit?

"Yeah, plays two. You didn't know that? I thought y'all were together." Sheldon picked up on the stranger's familiar drawl. He was unaware of Zack's abilities as well, that could explain his knack for Rock Band.

"How do you not know that, Penny?" Cera's unmistakable voice asked.

"I guess I just didn't think to ask." That was Penny again.

"That seems to be going around. How do you ever learn someone, if you don't ask questions?" After Cera's query, Sheldon turned his full attention back to the comic book at hand. It was in better condition than he expected. He decided it would be a good addition to his collection.

"Hi Sheldon! Here to ruin everyone's fun? You seem to enjoy that."

"Wheaton…I…do no such thing." Sheldon was flustered.

"You're not actually here with this guy are you?" Will turned toward Cera.

"Wil." Cera protested.

"You gonna introduce me to your…friend?" Elliot gestured to Sheldon.

"Dr. Sheldon Cooper this is Elliot Davis, my oldest and dearest friend."

"Hey man!" A grinning Elliot stuck his hand out.

Though Elliot stood a few inches lower than Sheldon, he made up for in brawn. After a several long seconds Sheldon felt compelled to shake Elliot hand. "Uh, hello. Cera and I are not exactly friends. She's more of an acquaintance."

"Eh, she grow's on you. She nearly impossible to get to get rid of. Been tryin' for years." Elliot winked at Cera and grinned at his own joke. "East Texas right?" Turning his attention back to Sheldon and clapped him hard on the shoulder.

"Yes, Galveston." Sheldon wondered how offended Cera's friend would be if he sanitized his hands. Sheldon found the thoughts of contaminates outweighed not offending the Cera's friend and pulled sanitizer from his pocket.

"Pasadena. Cera did you know he was from Texas?" Elliot turned toward Cera.

Cera merely raised her eyebrows and gave a slight nod. "I think we need to go. I need to, I need to pick Merritt up, soon."

"Uh, OK, I'll tell Tara to call." A confused Elliot gave Cera a quick hug.

"Yeah." Cera quickly walked out into the rain not waiting to see if Penny or Sheldon were following. The tension in her head had been growing since Sheldon walked into Penny's apartment. She needed to tell Sheldon. She needed to tell her family. The secret was causing her near constant stress headaches. She had considered blurting it out in the store, but Elliot might have actually killed Sheldon.

Sheldon wasn't faring much better and was just as eager to escape. From the moment Cera had leaned over him in Penny's car, his mind had gone on high alert and his body had tensed. Watching her be affectionate toward another man had been…peculiar, even if he was an old friend. His own involuntary reaction to it had been…startling. He had wanted to blame the tightening in his chest on something, anything else, but the sensation was not unfamiliar and always connected to her.

The old friend in question, though friendly, had been quite intimidating, despite only being level with Sheldon's nose. His eye contact was too intense and his grip too tight as if he was trying to subtly assert his dominance over him. Sheldon wondered if Cera had told Elliot about their…interactions and his behavior that, according to Penny was, objectionable. Of course, if this man was aware of that, Sheldon was certain he would have been more than intimidating.

Penny's car was silent after everyone settled in for the trip back. Cera was still feeling anxious as Penny pulled out onto the wet road. She just couldn't settle into the ride.

"Penny, could you please slow down?" Cera felt her tension rise and gripped the door handle.

"What? I'm barely going."

"Actually, your speed is above the documented speed limit." Sheldon called from the back.

Though Penny reduced her speed she then proceeded to cut across in front of another vehicle. Through all this Cera's grip on the door handle tightened and her breathing became labored. The first chance she got she jumped from the car and stumbled across a lane of traffic to the sidewalk.

"Cera? Cera! What is she doing?!" Penny slowed, but the flow of traffic prevented her from stopping and helping her friend.

"Penny you have to get her back in the car!" Sheldon was struggling to understand what Cera was doing.

"I've got to cross traffic Sheldon! Hold on…Keep an eye on her!" After rerouting around, Penny pulled up close enough for Sheldon to jump out after her.

"Olivia, what are you doing?"

"Sheldon?" Cera was breathing hard while wringing her hands, and sitting on the sidewalk with no regard to the rain falling on her. Cera's head snapped up to look at him. Her eyes were wide, she seemed confused or maybe surprised to see him. He wasn't sure which emotion she displayed, but he could tell he wasn't expected.

"Where's Merritt?"

"That's your daughter, correct?" Sheldon's question was just met by a repeat of the same question.

"Is she hurt? Merritt, is she hurt?"

"I don't know." Sheldon looked at her closely and recognized the problem she was having - a panic attack. He understood the loss of control and panic. Though he didn't know the cause he…felt…bad for her. He also knew if he didn't get her breathing under control she would pass out and he would never get her off the sidewalk.

Sheldon managed to get her back into the car and sat in the back with her. She was still asking odd questions and her breathing still labored. Sheldon rifled through his messenger bag and retrieved one of his emergency paper bags. He debated whether or not he wanted to sacrifice one for her. It was his after all. Deciding to be a gentleman, he positioned the bag on her face.

Cera's breathing had regulated by the time they reached the apartment complex. She was lethargic and a bit dissociative, so Penny guided her upstairs with Sheldon giving directions the entire way. He even directed them to his apartment.

"She is suffering from a panic attack Penny, she doesn't need your entropy to compound her distress."

Cera was led in and placed in the middle of the couch. Sheldon handed her a bottle of water.

"Where's Merritt?"

"Maybe we should call her, she's got a kiddie phone." Penny suggested, taking Cera's phone from her.

Sheldon yanked the phone from Penny's hand and pushed Merritt under contacts. No answer, so he dialed again.

"Hello?" A young girl answered.

"Hello, Merritt uh, this is, uh, Doctor-" He realized half way through his introduction, he didn't know her last name and he lost momentum.

"You can't talk to kids like that-Hey Merritt, this is Miss Penny..."

Penny got a brief explanation from Merrit and had her speak with Cera to calm her. Cera leaned her head back on the couch and closed her eyes, letting reassurance bring clarity to her panic induced flashbacks and disassociation.

"Merritt said this is post stress disorder and she just gets this way sometimes. Something about a wreck."

"Post-traumatic stress disorder, or PTSD. A wreck would indeed cause that." Sheldon just watched Cera. She looked surprisingly peaceful considering what she had just undergone. He supposed this is why she seemed…different and it would explain the scars. He wanted to sit in his spot, but he was afraid to be near her. Her breathing rate indicated she wasn't actually asleep. So he just stood, and watched instead.

"Sorry about that. I haven't done that in a while. I was in a head on collision…January 17 2004, it's been over seven years. It's left me a little… dysfunctional, even after all this time. I forget that Merritt wasn't with me. It broke my lower right ankle, left femur, left forearm, and left side of my face. I was in the hospital for five weeks and in rehab for almost a year. I couldn't…I couldn't make myself drive for over a year." Cera voice was weak and she still hadn't moved or opened her eyes. She was embarrassed to have broken down like that and really hated showing Sheldon any more weakness.

"Such suffering is a real reason to fear anything. It is understandable that you are hyperaware and panic when presented with similar situations."

That was a considerate answer, for Sheldon, and one, Cera was not expecting. Opening her eyes, she looked over where he was standing a few feet away. He looked surprisingly concerned. Had she any energy left she would have poured it all out right then and there. He had already even spoken to Merritt. The rest just seemed logical.

"But you're better now and Merritt's ok." Both heads turned toward Penny. They had nearly forgotten she was there.

After a beat Cera answered. "You are right. Speaking of Merritt, I need to go pick her up. Would you mind giving me a lift?"

"Uh, sure. You left your guitar in my apartment anyway."

"You will be careful, won't you Penny. Be mindful of all traffic laws and don't make any sharp turns. I'd hate for her to run down the road in another one of her foolish episodes." Sheldon was suddenly feeling off balance and he had hoped the flip observation would help center him again. It didn't.