Warning: things get graphic.
REALLY graphic.
REALLY, REALLY graphic.
Because I think the subject claims for it.
Again, thank you so much for the reviews and the support!
More than a woman
Chapter 5: Too much heaven
CC kept her eyes on Niles' face.
His eyes were slightly wider than usual, glued to her middle.
An unexpected positive aspect of the situation revealed itself suddenly, to the blonde: the fact she was truly proud of the choices she had made regarding her body.
Therapy and a variety of life experiences could make CC know that the body was hers and she could decide whatever she wanted to do of it; however, it was not enough. The real thing that changed her life was the moment when she was really able to believe it to the point she would take decisions that were not related to what would make her more similar to this or that, but to find out what made her look at herself and find it beautiful.
The result was that now, even if she still didn't know what Niles was thinking or feeling, she was what she had chosen to be, and nothing could take that from her.
It had been a long process, that started with doubt and reached pride at having such an unique body, and led her to a myriad of decisions.
Keeping her hair blonde and at shoulder-length, for example, sophisticated and practical, as she had decided suited better her personality and motivations.
Using clothes that didn't hide her large shoulders and breasts.
Lasering all the hair in her genitals, leaving just white chocolate-colored smooth skin there.
Every time she had looked in the mirror, since she was conscious of the process, she saw a whole sexual being and felt more and more content with that identity.
She had spent a good part of her life feeling kind of guilty when she looked at herself, thorn between enjoying the view and believing she was, in fact, an abnormality. The notion that she was free to love herself and find how she wanted to be made her bring everything she had to plain sight and find it esthetically harmonic: her blond hair, full lips, big breasts, large shoulders, small waist, plain stomach, member, labia, long legs and not small, but delicate feet.
From the moment CC liked what she saw, everything got lighter and brighter.
Of course, her deepest fears were not simply gone: she still wondered if and how she would manage to find true love, once a relationship with a man would require him to keep wanting her after he knew everything about her, and she wondered if there was someone like this out there.
CC often questioned herself what everything really was: did she include her evil side, in this? If so, did it mean she thought a man could not love her because she was not the standard generous and easy-going person, besides the fact she was not, to some people, even a real woman?
When she thought those things, she often remembered herself of Niles and her hopes that he liked her at some extent, once he made sure to point out, every chance he got, that he was aware of her bad habits and quirks, and still stayed around her and seemed to enjoy her company.
And that was how she supposed he had planted firmly his flag on her heart, years ago, as the first man to look at her, see something different, not mind he didn't get what it was, and stay to enjoy it.
Of course, it would be really nice if, now that he knew the truth, he liked what he saw. However, she felt content with herself and her choices, and it would be great if she had a positive answer from him, not because she couldn't live without his acceptance, but because they felt really good together.
She couldn't say he was not fascinated, at least, by the way he had frozen there.
To break the moment and find out something of his impressions, she whispered, 'I see you're not looking away'.
Niles lifted his eyes up to her face, 'In fact, I was going to ask you if I may look closer'.
To say CC was surprised didn't do justice to the feeling.
She felt thrilled, aroused, moved.
The night had turned into a fantasy: it seemed things, somehow, were taking the form she desired.
She licked her lips, deciding to give him her permission, 'If you're sure'.
Niles nodded and pushed himself to the edge of the bed, so he had his face really close to her middle.
His eyes lowered slowly, looking at her with attention.
CC noticed that, for some reason, she didn't feel evaluated or objectified. There was an indefinable warmth in the way his eyes moved over body, from breasts to folds and member; a sensuality in the slight ticking of his breathing on such sensitive skin; a tenderness over his respectful stance.
She realized he was taking his time to know her, as he had been doing since they met: observing, paying attention, noticing the details and staying around.
Being in a temporary passive position, she seized the opportunity to observe him, too.
CC asked herself what that look on Niles' face meant, once she had already decided his attitude towards her body was the same it has been to her as a person.
How was it that he looked at her?
Was it the regard he would give to an intricate work of art, with the revelations, mysteries, shadow and light schemes?
Was it the careful curiosity over a delicate flower, that may be better seen first at a distance, so you can feel the perfume and contemplate the forms before reaching out and knowing where to touch without tearing it apart?
Whatever it was, it had to do with carefulness, but not in the sense that he feared she would break if he did the wrong thing; it was about thinking that what they shared was so special it was worth the wait and the search for the right approach.
CC smiled. Yes, that was it. He had waited for her until he thought the time to get closer had arrived.
It was a pity that the way he chose – the proposals – put her unprepared self in a panic.
Her musings were interrupted when Niles straightened his back.
He was taking in the sight of all of her again.
He started at her feet, and his eyes went up, following the lines of her legs under the stockings, and her bare thighs.
Then, he gave a long look at her most intimate parts.
He went on to her stomach and her breasts.
His glance reached her lips and stayed there for a while.
When his eyes found hers, what they showed was unmistakable.
Desire was not something Niles could hide, now that CC had understood him.
He licked his lips and gulped.
She waited for what he was preparing to say.
'May I touch you?', he asked.
She thought she would faint.
That was more than she had ever heard from someone.
CC had turned to paid escorts and other professionals, at a certain point of her life, when she got tired of rich and educated men who would turn into monsters of aggressiveness or cowardice (not that she could really tell them apart, sometimes) when they knew about her. For some time, she would take brief trips in the weekends, to other cities, where she could go to certain places or stay in certain hotels without much risk of meeting a known face.
Those hired people had the advantage of not asking any embarrassing questions, but the fact they didn't care enough, sometimes, to even feel curiosity, made her have an empty feeling after the immediate urges were satiated.
This was completely different.
This was happening with someone who cared – someone who had even put his heart on the line for her.
This was something she believed had a chance of working out.
When CC answered, it was to repeat, in a whisper, 'If you're sure'.
Niles nodded silently.
He lifted his hands and rested them on the sides of her thighs, on the limit between stockings and skin, caressing and feeling the different textures.
Then, he advanced to her hips, and traced the curve of her waist.
His fingertips went up slowly to touch her breasts, as if drawing the forms.
He covered her mounds, pressing her nipples under his palms.
And teased them with a flick of his fingers.
CC moaned.
Niles sighed and something appeared on his face.
Something like raw desire.
CC herself was struggling: the damn sparks were there, and with them the arousal of those fingertips and palms exploring her skin as if it was the most delicious thing in the world.
Gulping, he lowered his hands until they grazed her stomach and made the contours of her navel.
His hands reached the skin of her pubis – a region CC loved to feel touched – and her penis jerked and got harder.
Niles' eyes went wide for a moment, his mouth slightly open, and he blushed.
CC reddened and was searching her voice, prepared to formulate an apology.
He looked up at her.
After a beat, he raised a brow and smirked, 'Someone seems to like me'.
She let out a chuckle, startled by his most boyish grin and inflection of voice being present in a moment like this.
The familiarity and endearment she knew they shared when he behaved like that lifted a huge weight from her heart.
'May I kiss you?'
She heard him, but was not able to answer immediately.
All she could think was Oh my God.
CC closed her eyes, breathing deeply, trying to focus on the reality of this.
And repeated, one more time, 'If you're sure'.
She felt him moving and opened her eyes.
Niles had got up and was facing her.
'It feels like a fairy tale', he spoke and gave her a tender smile, 'With all the similar questions and answers'.
CC smiled back, 'Yes, it does'.
He rested his hands on her waist, bringing her body to his.
It was more an asking than a pull, but the firmness of the grip on her was strong enough for her to feel he was, in fact, claiming her.
And, once CC had showed Niles she liked the rough side in that episode that involved Chinese cookies and a sponge, she knew his gesture was intentionally demanding.
When their mouths met and he nibbled at her lower lip, she whimpered, aware of the teasing and the motif in their relationship – the slow approach that provided plenty of time for exploration, before the main event.
When his mouth opened, inviting her tongue to invade it, she knew he liked the rough side, too, and intended to enjoy their similar tastes and all she had to offer.
Her hands got bold: they went to his hair to mess with it again, then went down to feel his strong shoulders and arms.
His own hands had gone to the small of her back, bringing her closer to him.
Hers went down, to massage his ass, as she had been dreaming of doing for years.
She just noticed she had been rubbing rather viciously against him when he parted from her and, through ragged breathing, said, 'Maybe I should take it off'.
'Uhm?', she asked, dazed, her hands not leaving his rear, not quite sure of what she had heard.
'I don't want to hurt you', he explained and made a gesture to the zipper on the front of his trousers.
CC opened her mouth in realization and surprise.
There were many things going on her mind.
First of them, that the phrase I don't want to hurt you had been said to her in these same circumstances before, and it always meant I can't go on.
Tonight, it meant I want to go on.
It occurred to her that she had surrendered so much to their connection that she hadn't remembered he had a zipper in his trousers that could, eventually, tear her delicate skin.
But he had remembered.
And, of course, she was thinking that he really, really, really shouldtake off his clothes.
CC brought her hands to his cheeks and pulled him to her, kissing him again.
Her hands reached for his loose tie.
Getting the message, Niles kept on kissing her while taking off his coat and started unbuckling his belt, while she got rid of his tie.
When his white shirt was open and he stayed just with it, the undershirt, boxers and those black socks with garters on, it was her time to drink in the sight of him.
'You know', she said, licking her lips, pointing at the ensemble, 'I've fantasized many times about you in these'.
'Really?', he grinned, excited by the idea.
'It started messing with my mind that time we got stranded in the Fine's', she answered, caressing his chest and helping him to get off his shirt, 'You would be on their sofa, clad just in something like this, reading the newspaper, and I found it so proper and, at the same time, so sexy...', she went for the undershirt, 'And then I saw you doing Risky Business in the main room and, well… I couldn't keep lying to myself and pretend I was not affected, anymore'.
He had such a happy face she felt immediately glad to have told him those things.
Wasn't it magical when something you think is a dark secret turns into the light in someone's eyes?
'So', he asked, lifting the undershirt by his head to take it off, 'You think I'm sexy?'
She planted her hands on his chest to explore it as soon as it was bare, 'Yes, and you have no idea of how annoyed I was when I discovered those You can get women tapes you had bought'.
'That was stupid', he admitted, moving his shoulders in embarrass, 'But I had to do something'.
'About what?'
'About you never really paying attention to me'.
'I always paid attention to you'.
'Not as a man'.
'Of course I did! I just would never confess such a thing, with you being so obnoxious and a cretin in general'.
'Oh, enough with the praises', he did a faux pout, 'I would like to kiss you again, if you agree on letting old stories aside for the moment'.
'Such an easy opening for a zinger on me not wishing to throw anything old aside in the moment…', CC grinned and pecked his lips, 'But I won't do it. Be my guest and occupy our mouths as you wish'.
He grinned and did so.
This time CC could enjoy touching his torso without any layer of clothes separating them, and she discovered she truly liked how he felt under her fingertips: the warmth and texture of his skin seemed to put her senses in overdrive.
He separated his mouth from hers to kiss her jaw and chin.
He involved her with his arms in a hug, fitting their bodies together.
Her hands went to his ass, again.
He moaned and nibbled at her earlobe in retaliation.
She smiled at the mix of tenderness and arousal the contact of his tongue and lips with her skin created.
He tilted his head to kiss her shoulder and neck.
He lowered a bit, to reach her breasts, and CC closed her eyes in surrender.
She permitted herself to rest her hands on his head, treading her fingers through his hair.
He felt really good.
They had synchrony and chemistry, and all thoughts of how impossible this had seemed to be were gone.
He let go of her breasts and she whimpered before she could hold it in.
She heard his chuckle and opened her eyes in surprise.
Niles was grabbing her hips as if he intended to pull her forward.
And he did, because he was sitting on the bed again, and obviously wanted to keep her close.
CC looked down and saw him trailing kisses from her stomach to her pubis, felt his hands caressing her backside and keeping her in place, and then...
She could barely believe when she felt Niles' tongue on her.
He kissed around the base of her member, licking firmly, as if he was recognizing the territory through his tongue.
He found her labia and rolled his tongue there, exploring her folds.
CC couldn't hide her appreciation: she let out a deep moan and grabbed his hair.
She was so wet and hard the only thing in her mind was that he was arousing all of her.
She could barely breath, realizing that, when he had asked to kiss her, he meant all of her body, with that same teasing start and time to feel her reactions.
Did it meant he would give a step further, now, too, or they had reached some kind of threshold?
Niles answered her mental question.
He traced her length with his lips, and then with his tongue.
And then he opened his mouth and took her in.
He was French-kissing her – sometimes her vagina, sometimes her cock, as if both had the same right for attention and care – while his hands massaged her buttocks as she had done to him.
She felt as if all of her body was on fire.
CC threw her head back and groaned savagely.
Niles pulled her even closer to him, taking advantage of the position of his hands.
His head moved as in a passionate lip-lock with the most intimate parts of her, his mouth open and wet.
Feeling her control slipping quickly, CC pulled at his hair and whimpered, 'Easy, please'.
'Does it hurt?', he asked, worried, his hands softening the touch and his lips bestowing delicate kisses on the tip of her cock and her labia.
Again, it was like in their previous kisses, and in their relationship in general: they couldn't really part, even when they decided to.
'No', she answered hoarsely, 'I want it to last, and it's… almost too much'.
He smiled his understanding and kept the lightness, his hands caressing her rear delicately and his lips teasing the skin in her front.
The feathering touches intended to soothe, and they did it initially, but they kept her nerve endings in alert in such a way CC could almost hear the humming under her skin.
Her knees bent a bit.
Niles noticed, looked up at her and took her hands, 'Come here'.
She waited for him to grab his bag and throw it on the floor, and permitted him to guide her until she was laying alongside him in the middle of his bed.
Then, she claimed his lips.
He kissed her back sensuously, establishing that slow pace of discovering and exploration that was careful but without restraint or shyness: his hands pulled her to him, making clear he wanted her, while his mouth was open and totally receptive to the contact with her.
His attitude during foreplay made her crave for what would come next.
It occurred to her that it must have been his plan, when he teased her through zingers and mind games – that she would crave for more.
She did, but she had decided to keep it just in her fantasies.
Now it seemed she was going to have everything she had always desired from this man.
CC threw a leg over Niles' hip, a gesture of subconscious possession.
She spoke between desperate kisses, 'I... How can you...?'
'Uhm?', he parted from her to look into her eyes, seemingly dazed, 'Be more specific. I'm not in the right state of mind for difficult questions'.
She took some seconds to formulate her thoughts more clearly, 'How can you be all right with... me?'
He raised his brows, 'I have no idea. I suppose you're so sexy I often forget your evil side'.
CC made an indignant face, and hit his shoulder lightly, 'You know what I mean'.
'I do, but it seems you don't', he answered.
'Uhm?'
'Dear, we sound like two idiots', he shook his head, chuckling.
She smiled, 'We have a lot on our minds…'
He smiled back, 'Yes, but for such a brilliant woman, sometimes you're really slow'.
His eyes went to his hand that involved her body.
It caressed the curve of her hip and reached the thigh that was over him.
He spoke again, whispering, 'It seems you're disturbed by the fact that, even if you have told me what you thought I had to know, I still want you', he looked into her face again, 'Is that it?'
She nodded emphatically, 'Well, yes! I really thought tha-...'
She couldn't finish speaking, because Niles used his hand on her thigh to maneuver her, putting CC on her back and getting on top of her, pulling his boxers down to free himself in the process.
Her eyes got wide at how hard he was when he let his body touch hers.
And he obviously didn't mind that their lengths were rubbing one against the other.
'Yes, Babcock, I really want you', he challenged her, his eyes a dark shade of blue, 'What are you going to do about it?'
'You tell me, Bell Boy', her hips kept moving at their own volition, while she felt his strong shoulders and back with her eager hands, 'Because I have no idea'.
He grinned at her sincerity, 'Let's find out together', he got serious, 'Give a chance to us, witch', he kissed her lips tenderly, 'Please'.
She sighed, 'You don't leave me much of a choice'.
Niles squinted at her, tilting his head in annoyance, 'I hope you don't mean I'm so fat you can't escape from under me. Because that would not be the right thing to say'.
CC chuckled, finding incredibly endearing that familiar disapproving expression, and felt aroused by the idea of kissing away the scowl from his face.
She pulled him down for a soft touch of lips, 'No, you stupid man, that was not what I meant'.
'What was it, then?', he asked, wary.
'I meant this feels so right I can't really say no'.
They kissed again, that feeling of surrender from before hitting them again.
And CC lifted her legs to wrap them around Niles' waist.
His eyes settled on hers.
He understood the silent asking, and adjusted himself to enter her.
She moved her hips to help him.
He found the right position and they moaned, overwhelmed by the sensations of so much contact.
And such brand new contact.
They stayed with their bodies still, just kissing and reinforcing their connection.
When it was obvious, by the moving of their hips, that they couldn't wait anymore, Niles started a very enjoyable pace, in and out of CC.
Her hands caressed his back, then lowered themselves to rest on his ass and feel his movements.
His right arm was supporting him on the bed, his hand cradling her head to feel her moving it while they kissed.
His left hand teased her breasts with the amount of force she loved, eliciting a deep moan from her, and making her member jerk against his stomach.
Niles moaned in delight at her reaction.
His left hand rested over her heart.
In feathered touches, he lowered it.
CC's hips moved against him in uncontrolled arousal, her nails grazing his buttocks and up his back.
Niles' hand reached her length and started sliding on it in synch with the movements of his hips.
She gasped, 'Oh, my God...'
He grunted, not able to be more coherent than her.
Both focused on keeping the pace they had already increased.
Their kisses turned deeper.
Soon her breathing was so irregular she had to break the contact of lips.
Niles sought the side of her neck immediately, eager to keep feeling her in his mouth.
She moaned, 'You're so fond of it...'
'It what?', he asked in her ear, nibbling at it.
'It', she answered, resting her own hand over his, between them.
'Of course I'm very fond of it...', he bit and licked her neck, 'It's part of you'.
His words triggered something in her.
CC felt exploding.
Her whimpered Oh, Niles was followed by her whole body tensing and the orgasm hitting her as a full body experience – her legs trembling, her breasts hardening, her cock jerking and letting out her seed, her vagina clenching around his length.
She could feel one of Niles' hands on her head, grabbing her hair, while the other circled her tip and stayed there when his body tensed, too, he went the deepest he could in her and let go, calling out her business name while she felt him pulsating inside her.
They stayed like that, entwined and buried in each other, eyes closed, suspended in the intensity of the moment.
Then, slowly, Niles slipped off CC, and rested her member on her stomach delicately, using his now free hand to help support his weight and not crush his partner, who seemed to be as dazed and uncontrolled as himself.
When they calmed down enough to look into each other's eyes, that tenderness they had been sharing since she came to his room was there, again.
They sighed in unison.
And chuckled in synch at the devastating and incredibly delicious corniness of it.
Niles caressed her cheek with the back of his hand and whispered, 'Are you happy?'
CC lifted a hand to caress his hair, 'More than happy', she pulled him down for a kiss, 'I've never felt so glad to do the right thing'.
'You mean having sex with me?', he smirked, 'That's the first time I've heard it put like this'.
'That was amazing, too, but I meant my decision that our story should not end with you not knowing the truth'.
He smiled, 'Our story is a nice way to call it', he kissed her softly, 'You are a very nice person, Miss Babcock'.
CC started chuckling.
'What?', he asked, trying to sound anything but in heaven, and not succeeding.
'You called me Miss Babcock when you came, and now I don't know how I will be able to deal with it in everyday life'.
'You're saying...', he asked, his eyes hopeful, '… that you're staying?'
'Just if you do', her eyes softened, 'What I hope you intend to, once you said you would do anything to make me happy, and managed it surprisingly well, until now'.
'Surprisingly?', he tried to seem offended but, again, was betrayed by a huge grin, 'How do you dare?'
'I dare because I know you always get me', she grinned at him, 'Isn't it?'
'Far from me to disagree with such a powerful entity'.
They kissed again, in a delicate joining.
'Staying with you is what I want most', Niles finally said, eyes close, kissing her cheek, 'And now that we've proven to ourselves how great it feels, it would be wrong to permit anything to tear us apart'.
'Uhm', she hummed, 'I think I'll enjoy this romanticism'.
'I'm at your service'.
'That is something I'm sure I'll enjoy'.
They just smiled at each other, connected by the feeling of belonging.
Niles laid at her side, indicating she should choose a position to rest.
CC lifted her right arm up her head and looked at him, showing she wanted him to spoon her side.
He did, gladly, and reached out to pull the covers over them.
She scooted closer to him, grabbing his hand and positioning his arm over her waist.
He grinned like a fool at her gesture.
'All right', she said with fake annoyance, 'You can smile like that, now. But just because I don't need to focus on anything but relaxing and enjoying our nest'.
His expression turned suddenly to one of adoration, and Niles leaned on CC, grabbing her hip and devouring her lips with renewed enthusiasm.
When he let go, she was blushing, breathless and open-mouthed, 'Wow... What did I do to deserve it?'
'Really, Babcock?', he asked, his eyes dark with passion, 'Do you think you can say we have a nest and not suffer any consequences?'
'Oh, well, get used to it', she smiled, relaxing, 'I'm full of surprises'.
'And just wonderful ones', Niles answered, adjusting his body to her side and keeping the hold of his arm on her waist.
They kissed softly and settled for much needed sleep.
Both knew they still had a lot to discuss.
However, once the most important thing – that they were meant to stay together – was already established, the rest could wait.