I own nothing of Dragon Age. Just Amilee.

***Revised 4/12/17***

"For now you can stay, right here we will play, until somehow you can find, a slightly different frame of mind, right here in my arms, away from all harm, you'll be safe from all the flares, although I know you don't care..." -Frame of Mind by Tristam, Braken

"Why are we having a party? We still don't know what caused the Breach," Amilee growled as she watched the citizens of Haven dance merrily in the courtyard. In the past few hours her mood had been spiraling, a strange inability to control her emotions growing. Something was going on with her and she didn't know what.

Standing next her was Cullen, as they looked on from the battlements near the entrance to the city. The Herald had returned earlier that day to declare their success, although the quiet of the skies was testament enough. She had gone on to tell the people that while there was still work to be done, but that evening they would feast.

"That is a matter for tomorrow, Amilee. Can we not take this time to celebrate our victory?" He leaned on the stone parapet to look over at her, obviously trying to discern what was really on her mind. "Must you remain closed off, even now? Lay down arms for one night. Join your friends in celebration, you deserve as much."

"You're one to talk, Commander," she quipped back absently.

When she had first approached Cullen as a tentative ally, he had been recovering from the tortures from the abominations at the Circle in Ferelden. She explained to him her situation, although she had been vague about the timeline, telling him that the next time he saw her, she would be younger and very much in need of his help. She gave him clear instructions to pretend he didn't know her and to be merciful in his judgment when it came to her being a mage. She wasn't sure at first, why he had agreed so readily, but years later, when she gave him the letter he was to give her brother after the fight with Meridith, he had asked if she might have an interest in him romatically.

Having just been turned away by Anders, she'd told him gently that she had no such interest, although she would not mind being considered a close friend. Every few months during her time as the Hawk, they would write letters, venting to each other about their jobs and minor personal issues. It seemed to be enough for them. On some level, he understood it was all she could give, and she was grateful for this.

"We gained the Templars from Therinfall Redoubt, but what of the others in Thedas. Could they not have fallen to the same fate as the ones we fought? And who is the Elder One-"

"You spend so much time worrying about everyone else." Sighing, he crossed his arms. "What happened to you, Amilee? You've changed. And I'm not sure-"

Her eyes turned and focused on something beyond the valley in the mountains and her hand came up indicating silence, halting his words. A low thrum had crawled up her spine, a trilling buzz at the back of her mind.

Sighing in exasperation, Cullen relented, "What is it?"

"Something's coming." Amilee narrowed her eyes further as Cole appeared at her side.

"The Elder One comes. He is very angry that we took his templars," the spirit whispered, his eyes alight with anxious worry. "He brings his mages instead. We have to move!"

Amilee touched Cole's arm gently to to instill calm between them. "He is that near?"

"Yes. He comes to kill the Herald. For her mark."

Sure enough, the warning bells sounded from the watch tower and she immediately looked to Cullen, taking charge. "Go find the others and tell them what's happening. Cole, I need you to help the townspeople take shelter. Tell as many as you can to get to the Chantry."

Both men stood still for a moment, hesitating at her instructions. "And what, pray tell, are you going to do?" Cullen asked warily.

"What I do best," she ground out cryptically. "Now go!"

Surprised by the authority in her voice, Cullen nodded curtly and walked away in search of the other advisers. Cole, however, remained.

"There's no time..." he fretted softly, azure eyes imploring and hands fidgeting as he leaned his head in toward hers. "I may not hear you, but I see you're hurting. It makes the warmth less, a stuttering pulse. Listless, languid, lethargic. Something wears you down. Please don't let whatever it is break in like Envy."

Before she could reply he turned and ran, intent on following her directions. For a spirit who couldn't hear her, he already knew well enough about her to notice when something was wrong. Was it that he somehow remembered her tendencies subcousiously? She shook her head at the notion and took a deep breath to focus on what lay ahead.

She spotted a small figure running their way off in the distance, a few others not far behind. Jumping down from the impossible height of the battlements to the ground below, she allowed her force to slow the fall. Then she ran like a bat out of hell towards this new person. Within minutes, she'd met them halfway between the pass and Haven.

"Going somewhere?" she queried breathlessly.

The man halted as she did and he turned to face the group of mages that still approached. "I wasn't planning on stopping," he quipped wryly as he pulled his staff out from its holster on his back. Spinning once, he released a spirit bomb that knocked the five or so enemies down, stunning them for the moment.

"I assume you know what's going on, then?"

"Indeed. Although, I find myself fashionably late to the party." He turned back to her and she got a better look at him. His clothes were Tevinter in origin but dirty, his black hair greasy from a lack of bathing, but still well kept, as were the curls of his mustache over his charming half smile. His skin was a dark olive tone and he had a beauty mark an inch from the corner of his right eye. Dashing was the word that came to her mind. And if the personality she glimpsed just then was anything to go by, the word fit him well.

"Well, get your arse in gear and keep going. I'll hold them off. I can see you're already exhausted as it is."

He frowned. "There's an army of mages on its way here and you want to face them alone?"

"Crazy, I know. But I've got a few tricks up my sleeve. Go on then. Ask for Herah and tell her Amilee sent you."

Too tired to argue, he shrugged. "By your leave, my dear. I wish you luck."

As he continued on his way past her, she stared at the massive force bearing down on the valley. The ones the man had knocked to the ground were coming to and she waited patiently for them to stand. Her kunai, all twenty of them, had slipped out of their sheaths and positioned themselves to fan out behind her.

The enemy stared as smiled gleefully, a red glint coming to her eyes. "It's a shame I can't do this more often."

Before the first mage could cast in defense, her weapons pointed at their targets and flew, faster than the eye could see, seeming to weave back and forth between the lot of them. By the time she stopped, the enemy soldiers were nothing but a pile of gored limbs and blood on the ground.

"Can't even put up a fight," she clucked with mock disdain, then paused in sudden horror. What the hell was wrong with her that she would delight in killing these people, enemy or not?

A dark energy resonated within her and caused her lyrium rune to glow faintly. She winced and turned to its source on a high rise to her left. A too tall, misshapen man look down upon Haven, a woman standing on his other side. The army behind them was vast, too many to hold off by her weapons alone. And the others would be too worried for the innocent lives in need of protection to focus all effort on such a battle. There was only one way she could cut them off.

She doubled back until she was directly between Haven and the army. Pulling in all the power she could from the mages ahead, she conjured a great ball of energy and shot it high into the air. A huge barrier began to form extending far and wide until it met with the ground and expanded into a translucent shield, barring the mages from coming any further. Maintaining the spell she backed away slowly, making her way to the gates once more.

Scattered enemies yelled in outrage, casting magic and swinging weapons uselessly against her barrier. A great bellow of anger sounded from beyond. She looked up and the creature, the Elder One she assumed, glaring down at her with great menace. Score one for the little mage, she thought with a smirk, flicking him off in defiance.

The Herald swaggered over to her from the gates. "I guess we don't need the trebuchets," Herah commented as she awed at the sight.

Shaking her head quickly, Amilee cried, "I can't hold it up for long! Do what you need to do with them before I run out of mana!"

Taking immediate action, Herah, The Iron Bull, and Cassandra scrambled to prepare the trebuchets and fire them upon the mountain beyond. They cheered with excitement as an avalanche was brought down upon the helpless army, effectively burying them beneath it.

"Alright, Amilee. I think its safe to release the spell," Cullen urged gently.

Before she could respond a great ball of red electricity flew at the height barrier, shortin it out. Above them came a piercing cry as a black dragon descended to fire more upon the buildings within the walls.

The rune at her throat flared again, starting to burn and Amilee cried out in shock and pain, collapsing to her knees in sudden weakness. Fed up with the offending trinket, she ripped her rune off tossing it away as the red darkened, turning completely black and bursting into dust. She heard whispering all around her and her blood ran cold.

"You were saying?" Amilee sneered to the commander, unable to quell the anger seething within. This was the Elder One's fault. She'd never had any issues with red lyrium before. How was she supposed to protect the people now that the focal point of her magic was gone? She ran with Herah and the others, helping the last of the villagers get to the Chantry, trying in vain to keep her anger and the whispers at bay.

The chancellor, Roderick, greeted them at the Chantry door but he struggled to stay standing, a wound in his side.

"He tried to stop a templar. The blade went deep. He is going to die." Cole had come to catch the man before he fell, to support him, leading the poor man to sit in a chair.

"What a charming boy," Roderick groaned with sarcasm.

Cullen came back from further inside. "Saytie, Amilee. Our position is not good. While you bought us time to get most of our people in here, we have nowhere to go now. There have been no demands, only advance, after advance."

"There was no bargaining with the mages. This Elder One takes what it wants."

Cullen nodded in acknowledgment to Dorian as he approached them. "This place could hold off the dragon for a while but..."

"I've seen an Archdemon. I was in the Fade but it looked like that," Cole said as he knelt next to Roderick.

Amilee nodded in agreement. "I've seen one as well. While I wouldn't mind finding a way to kill it, getting the villagers to safety comes first."

"The Elder One doesn't care about the village," Cole interjected. "He only wants the Herald."

"From what I gathered from Redcliffe," Dorian added. "It marched all this way for you."

"If it will save these people, he can have me," Herah replied.

"It won't." Cole and Amilee countered.

"This force does not seem concerned about specifics," the Tevinter mage agreed.

"He wants to kill you," the young man continued. "No one else matters but he'll crush them, kill them anyway. I don't like him."

"You don't like-" Cullen started with frustration.

Amilee cut him off, "They're right. A man who would tear a hole in the sky wouldn't care who is caught in the cross fire. A smarter man would use those we protect against us."

"There are no tactics to make this survivable. Unless you can turn into a dragon..."

Bringing her hand to her neck, she growled, "Now that my runestone is gone, I'd have to drain power from what few mages we have to preform such a feat. I'll not risk anyone to attempt a spell I haven't used before."

He turned his gaze upon Herah. "You could lure the beast down, turn the remaining trebuchets and cause another avalanche."

"We'd bury Haven!" she objected.

"We're dying, but we can decide how. Many don't get that choice."

Dorian was appalled."That's not acceptable. I didn't race here only to have you drop rocks on my head."

"What of the innocents we harbor, Cullen?" Amilee cried, outraged. "Would they want to go out holed up in here? Is there no other way to escape?"

"Chancellor Roderick can help," Cole interjected quietly. "He wants to say it before he dies."

"There is a path. You wouldn't know it unless you made the summer pilgrimage, as I have." The old priest moved to stand before the Herald as he went on. "The people can escape. She must have shown me. Andraste must have shown me so I could- could tell you."

"What are you on about, Roderick?" Saytie asked.

As he explained further Amilee's head began to pound and she winced. Though she had discarded her runestone, the dark power roaring inside was building as were the whispers, which meant the man was somehow getting closer. Without her runestone, she would continue to absorb the man's strange power little by little and it was already twisting her thoughts, making her feel anger as she'd never felt before. She caught Cole's glance, the world on pause as she poured all her emotion into her gaze. Then she headed for the doors without prompting, intent on leaving before she did something she'd regret and the others turned to her as they finished conversing.

"Amilee?" Herah called out.

"I have to go," she called behind her as she shoved at the door. "I'm sorry."

They all cried for her to stop, but before they could reach her, she'd slipped out. When Herah followed, she was nowhere in sight. The small mage was gone.

Once the inquisition had settled for camp late into the next day, Cole recounted the events of previous evening to the other companions, describing Amilee's state before she'd disappeared.

The others were more focused on her giant barrier spell, confused as to how Amilee could perform such a feat.

Solas, who had become well versed in the nature of Amilee's gift, explained beyond just her history. "She's a rulen cairn as titled by the People. It means magic stealer. A cautionary tale, exemplifying one of the worst rituals ancient Tevinter produced, but as she has proved it time and again, Amilee's power is unprecedented. The one who performed the ritual on her was very unfortunate to have done so."

"Why's that?" Sera asked as she chomped away on an apple.

Varric, who had been reluctant to reveal her past, elaborated grimly, "She made the guy explode. So yeah, he had no clue what he was doing."

Solas turned to the dwarf. "How old is she again, exactly?"

Varric shifted uncomfortably, replying, "She came to be with the Hawke family when she was about nineteen. During the fight with Knight-Commander Meredith, her runestone and the red lyrium sword reacted to each other and it... sent her back in time to the year of the Blight. She's as old as me now, if not a year or so younger."

Sera interrupted with a choking cough. "That's complete shite. That little chit can't be that much older than me. And time travel? That's a load of ballocks!"

"Stranger things have happened," Solas pointed out, gesturing to the sky.

"Go ask Leliana if you need more proof, Buttercup. But fact is, Amilee is nearly forty. She just doesn't act like it most of the time."

"What does her age have to do with anything?" Cole asked in confusion, .

"Between the lyrium and the nature of her gifts, it is not impossible to believe she is immortal as the People once were. So long as she maintains her life force, that is," Solas pointed out. "I'd not thought a person could survive the condition so long. It's fascinating. The red lyrium rune is what helped her control her power, correct?"

Varric rubbed his neck absently. "Yeah, she's had that thing for years. At first we weren't sure it would be safe for anyone, with what the way it screwed up my brother in only a short time. But she was insistent that she didn't hear the strange music. So that, coupled with the fact that it was helping to control her power, it seemed far better for her to have it than risk someone else finding it. It's never effected her until now."

"Why did it effect her?" The Iron Bull asked, finally joining in the conversation.

Cole explained softly, "She bends the old songs to her will, reshaping the power for herself. As long as she wears it, no one can be turned by it's whispers. But the Elder One... he beckoned the whispers into screams. Her eyes..." He hugged his hat to his chest. "They'd gone red like the templars at Therinfall. She is her, but the warmth twisted to burning cold. She needs help."

Solas responded grimly, "It seems with the Elder One's presence in this world, she was losing control of it. It would have begun to warp her mind so she fled to keep us safe. Even if this Corypheus hadn't shown up at Haven, which most likely intensified the reaction, it would have eventually turned her against us."

"Damnit!" Varric cursed, running his hand over his head in exasperation. He'd already mentioned to them his past encounter with Corypheus, which made him feel ten times worse about the situation.

The pale blonde rocked back and forth where he sat, picking at the frayed edges of his hat. "She ran to protect, not to abandon. We sit around talking, but it could already be too late! We have to find her!"

"Kid, we're all concerned about her but we have to figure out what to do when we find her, first. When the Herald gets back, we can make a plan to track her down, okay."

"Wanting, waning, wilting without warmth." He muttered to himself as he rubbed his chest absently. "Call to the star but no answer, alone again. I miss it. I miss her."

Patting the young man on the back, Varric sighed, "She's a Hawke. She has that effect on people. We'll find her, Kid, I promise."

Solas narrowed his eyes in consideration of Cole's behavior, but didn't comment on the spirit's odd attachment. "I have a good chunk of lyrium that would suffice for her needs until a new runestone can be made. She will need it when you find her. I shall retrieve it at once."

The young man and the dwarf tracked down the advisers quickly, waiting until they settled down from a bout of incessant bickering before approaching them. "So, uh, we wanted to know if anyone's concocted an idea to find Amilee?"

"She never turned up?" Josephine queried, shock evident. "First the Herald and now the Guardian..."

"Andraste's tits..." Cullen bowed his head, rubbing his temple in worry. He explained to the other advisers, "She did not look well last we saw of her. I'm not sure what was wrong but it looked serious. She ran away before we could ask. I should have thought of it sooner, but with the mess we're all in right now..."

"Yeah, about that," Varric started, wincing. "We think she might be in danger of turning into red lyrium fiend."

A collective "What?" sounded from them.

Cassandra was appalled by this. "No, there is no way. She cannot take in lyrium, she said it would kill her!"

Cullen closed his eyes and brought a hand to his brow, his response knowing. "Her runestone."

Woefully, Cole elaborated. "The Elder One changed it to change her."

"But she took it off," the commander reasoned. "Wouldn't that have broken its hold on her?"

Varric grimaced. "Yes... and no. First off, withdrawal from red lyrium can be more devastating than taking it. Voices, seeing things, and aggression come either way. Not pretty. Secondly, if she doesn't have a dispelling rune on her at all times, she can't control her intake of mana. If she expends enough magic, she could overcome it, but... she used a lot at Haven. And as far as I'm aware, she left without a source of mana to keep herself up to snuff. She casts any magic right now, she could die."

"Then you'll need to find her quickly. But she is very good at hiding when she doesn't want to be found. It would be like looking for a needle in a haystack," Leliana groused.

Josephine grimaced, "Or a diamond in a gold mine."

"Or a Qunari in a snowstorm," Cullen muttered grimly.

"Or... a hole in the sky?"

The lot of them turned to Cole and after a moment they burst into an uneasy laughter.

The young man frowned, looking down to his dwarven friend. "Was that wrong?"

Varric wiped a tear from his eye as he chuckled, "We're naming things that are difficult to find, Kid, not things that would stand out. But it was a good try."

Gripping the lyrium chunk Solas had given them, Cole offered, "I feel her when she's near, inside. Soothing, stilling and instilling. As long a we're close, I can find her."

Cullen nodded encouragingly, "That's better than nothing."

"So I can assume this means we're off to rescue her?" Varric prompted.

The commander winced with guilt. "I wish I could join you, I really do. But I must stay and monitor the troops. Tensions are high between the templars and the mages in our ranks."

"We can't risk staying too long. We do not have the adequate supplies," Josephine replied regretfully. "We can wait a couple days to see if either one of them returns to us but..."

Leliana pursed her lips, "While we all would want nothing more than to stay and find her, we cannot linger in this place for long. Corypheus could have spies out searching for us as we speak. We need to find somewhere the Inquisition might safely regroup and recover our losses. I can at least send a few scouts to sweep the area." She added after a pause, "Amilee left because we were in danger, she wouldn't want us to stay in danger for her sake."

"She is our friend!" Cole cried adamantly, his hands becoming fists. "Battered and bent until she breaks, bowing and bound. The song will sunder her mind and she'll die!"

Varric brought a hand to his forehead and sighed, "The Kid is likely to go whether he has company or not. And she's Hawke's little sister, for Maker's sake. I may as well be her crazy cousin, so I have to go too."

Cassandra crossed her arms and looked to Leliana. "We may not be able to stay long but that doesn't mean we need to stay together. As the advisers, we must remain with the Inquisition and lead it somewhere safe. Varric, you take Cole and go to the others. See who is willing to help you find Amilee. In the meantime we'll make ready to move on if Herah shows."

Cullen nodded firmly, as did the others. "Then we are agreed. Get to it."

Realistically, it would take a while for the Herald to find them and to recover. I made the Inquisitor a Qunari because it seemed the best choice for a hardy resistance to physical trauma and a speedy recovery for this amount of time.

Up next is a fun chapter. Pretty sure the idea hasn't been used yet. :)

Favorites and reviews welcome!