Chapter 4: When the Levees Break
Charlotte said I don't know so many times she felt like a broken record. It was hours of questions before Dr. Johnson had finally let her go back to the little room she had been assigned. It was late, well past what was normally lights out for her and the other women, when she was escorted to her door. Once the door was closed behind her, she leaned against it and slid down until she was sitting.
She felt raw, like she was an exposed nerve. For so long, she had so successfully kept everything bottled up. Now she didn't know where to begin with the flood of emotions. Trying to process it all was too much. Her body shook with the force of the sobs she tried to bite back. This was not coping, she thought, as she buried her face in arms, this was drowning.
The soldier's wild and desperate eyes came to mind. God help her. She remembered too well what it felt like to be helpless. Being so defenseless, that she couldn't even raise her arms up to shield herself, it had been the first true horror she had experienced at the hands of Hydra.
Why had she tried to help him? He didn't deserve it, especially not from her. The bastard had dragged her back to hell, to being tied down like an animal. He deserved whatever the Avengers had planned for him, and more. So much more.
But even as those angry words swirled through Charlotte's mind, another part of her thought was repelled by those wishes. No one should have to endure the kind of evil she and the other women had. Not even a Hydra agent. Kill him, or lock him away forever, just don't bring any more of that darkness into the world.
Eventually, she picked herself off the floor, and crawled into bed. Sleep eluded her, though. Every time she closed her eyes, all she saw were desperate, storm colored eyes.