Chapter 5: Setting The Boundaries
"Odin!" Frigga burst into the kings office in a fury which grew when she set eyes of Laufey.
"You! How dare you abuse my son's trust? How dare you presume that you have any right to take such liberties with him!?"
"Frigga enough! We have more serious matters to attend to." Odin shouted clearly above Frigga's voice and gestured them all to sit down.
Frigga turned slowly to look at her husband in concern. "What is it? Odin what has happened? And what do you mean? What could be more important than our son?! Do you know what that swine did to him?" She looked unsettled and angry and Odin looked old.
"Alfheim has declared war on Jotunheim and they will not be dissuaded."
Frigga sank down into a seat in shock. "The elves? But they are a peaceful people, they wouldn't attack except for a good reason? Odin Borsson. What. Did. You. Do!?"
"I had planned on marrying Loki to the eldest prince Feiorn but when the elves discovered Loki's bonding with Laufey they felt threatened, Asgard and Jotunheim are deadly forces when separate, together we are indestructible. I feel that the king Ellwyn is worried that we shall take over the nine realms." Odin murmured grimly.
"Well we cannot start a war Odin, what can we do?"
"I discovered a small truth about Loki and Laufey's engagement; Laufey wasn't promised Loki, he simply had first option over the king in the west of Jotunheim. If Loki's parents didn't want Loki to wed one of the kings they would have told the realms about him."
Loki looked up in surprise and stared hopefully at his father. "Can the engagement be ended?"
Odin hesitated. "No."
Loki choked and looked back at the floor.
"Your parents were still seriously considering Laufey as your mate when they died, it is only respectful that you follow their wishes. Loki I understand you feel like you are ill suited but I see that you have the potential to rule well together, if you can get past your differences." Odin tried to placate Loki but the prince felt beyond cheer.
'So this really is going to be my life from now on…'
'It isn't so bad, you'll be treated well on Jotunheim.'
'Oh great, my not-quite-mind is back. I'm treated well here so I don't need to go to Jotunheim.'
'Hm it doesn't look like you are treated well, your so-called parents don't even care that you were "Raped". That seems a little negligent to me.'
'That's not true, they care but there is a war on the way. They have their own problems to worry about. I don't need to add to their problems with my own.'
'Then who do you confide in?'
'Who indeed….'
Loki lost himself in his thoughts and only roused himself when Laufey's voice broke his peace.
"What do you intend to do Allfather? You cannot keep him from me and I must return to Jotunheim soon, I cannot do so without Loki, our bond will not allow it." Laufey eyed the Allfather carefully and Odin sighed heavily.
"I feel it may be best to wed you tonight and you can go on your way tomorrow morning. The sooner Loki is expecting and in Jotunheim the sooner this will be water under the bridge. The elves will want proof that Loki wants the marriage, a child would be perfect. Asgard shall keep Jotunheim safe until a child comes of your union."
Laufey nodded calmly, clearly he had been expecting that answer. "I accept your suggestion, we shall marry tonight and return to Jotunheim first thing tomorrow morning."
Frigga opened her mouth to argue and Odin voiced her thought in a politer way. "Not first thing, we shall see you both at morning meal."
Frigga huffed irritably. "Odin have you forgotten why I came here? This lout used an aphrodisiac on Loki against his will!"
Odin seemed to age even further if it was possible and Loki felt guilt twisting his insides.
'I'm making my father more tired than he deserves.'
"I am sure Laufey had a reason." Odin looked up at the king expectantly.
Laufey nodded simply and responded in a far too casual way. "Loki was having a hard time relaxing, I just helped him with my natural scent."
Odin gave Frigga a disapproving frown and Loki gaped at Laufey angrily.
"Father that isn't true!" Loki burst out and glared at his husband.
"Did you refuse Laufey out of nerves?" Odin said sharply.
Loki swallowed hard and nodded.
"Did he use a natural aphrodisiac on you?" Odin asked again.
Loki bowed his head and nodded again.
"Then I see no falsehood." Odin stood and came around the desk to stand before Loki.
"The wedding is tonight. I suggest you prepare yourself thoroughly for it and accustom yourself to your life. Laufey is not a bad man, he wants you to be happy, let him guide you Loki. You are behaving like a spoilt child who didn't get his way." Odin said lowly so that only Loki could hear.
Loki scowled knowing Laufey and Frigga were watching them curiously. How could his father be so mean as to say something like that? He was not being a brat! He was perfectly justified in denying Laufey and complaining about his attentions!
'You know that isn't true, Laufey hasn't done anything to hurt you intentionally.'
Loki frowned at the voice in his head. 'Sod you.'
Loki sulked out of his father's office to seek out Thor.
Thor was in his rooms when Loki found him, fast asleep in bed as was usual for the mornings.
"Thor get up! I have something important to tell you and I need a bath!" Loki yanked the sheets off of Thor and dragged his brother out of bed.
"Muuhnnggg Loki? What time is it?" Thor asked groggily and sat up with a stretch.
"Time to get up and listen to me while I bath." Loki grumbled and stalked in to the bathing chamber.
Thor followed obediently and watched Loki run the bath and climb in. He sat down beside the bath and listened patiently while Loki recounted the event of the last few hours.
"And so father wants me to marry him at once! I don't think I can Thor, I never would have thought he would use that foul substance on me, who knows what else he might do?" Loki sat in Thor's bath with his arms wrapped around his knees, Thor rubbed his *magic* soap into Loki's skin and hair.
Thor frowned thoughtfully. "Well, Jotunheim must desperately need heirs if he is willing to resort to such methods. But I agree he was wrong to do such a thing to you. If I could I would smash his skull with Mjolnir, this I promise you Loki."
"That's just it! He has many brothers and sisters! There are enough heirs!" Loki huffed and turned to look at Thor sadly.
"I'll miss you Thor, you have been the most supportive of me the last three days. I don't know what I'll do without you." He wrapped his arms around Thor's neck and Thor wrapped his arms around Loki's middle.
"I will try to see you as often as I can, I swear to you Loki, I got you into this and I will help you out of it. Perhaps I can join the army around the Jotuns city? Father will send soldiers to protect all the citizens of Jotunheim."
"It's just so hard. I don't want to move away from home, I don't want to have to answer to Laufey's every beck and call, I don't want-" Loki broke off and hid his face in Thor's shoulder to gain control over his emotions again.
"I wouldn't want to leave home either. There is no shame in admitting this minor weakness Loki, you are young and not really the type to go away from loved ones for long."
Loki sighed and looked up from Thor's shoulder. "It's different, when you are feeling like this our father listens to you and tries to help you, when I feel like this he ignores every word and does what he wants to do. He cares about you more than he does about me."
Loki felt all his emotions bubbling up and didn't hold them back, he cried into Thor's chest while his brother stroked his hair and back comfortingly.
"You cannot think our father doesn't love you Loki! He does love you he just…..has a funny way of showing it. Everything will be alright, you'll see, we will figure this out together."
"You didn't see his face today Thor." Loki whimpered sadly. "He was so angry and disappointed with me. He said that I'm a brat for complaining about what Laufey does to me."
Thor didn't know what to do so he just hugged Loki tighter.
Odin silently turned and walked away from Thor's bathing chambers, he left his son's room and went to see his wife.
'Loki doesn't feel loved by me? Because of today or because of past times? How often have I made this mistake with him?' Odin sighed, he wanted to have a closer bond with Loki but he couldn't find a common ground with him anymore. When Loki had been a child they had talked about a lot, Odin let his mind wander to a happier time.
*Flashback Begins*"Father! Father look! I found a bird in the garden with an injured wing! Can you help him please!?" Huge green eyes stared pleadingly up at him ignoring the gathered lords and kings murmurs of irritation.
Odin ignored them as well and gently scooped the bird from Loki's tiny hands, carefully he examined the wing and smiled at his son.
"Here I will show you how to help him. Put your hand on his wing with mine gently. Now wish his wing to get better imagine he is flying through the sky with a fully healed wing."
Loki's little face screwed up in concentration and his little fingers glowed green with magic and the birds delicate bones re-knitted themselves together. Loki opened his eyes slowly and squeeked in excitement!
"Oh he's better father! Look!" Odin smiled and stroked Loki's hair.
"Shall we take him out and set him free?"
"Yes!" Loki took Odin's hand and led his father out into the yard and they released the bird together.
"Look at him go father! He looks so happy to be free!" Odin smiled down at Loki.
"Indeed he does my son, freedom is worth more than any riches in the nine realms."*Flashback Ends*
Odin had arrived at Frigga's chambers. She was still angry with him and had been sensitive about their relationship, Loki's marriage and forceful bonding had brought up her worst memories and she was easily upset now. He needed to talk to her, if he couldn't talk to his wife who could he talk to? They had been married for centuries; they should be able to work through their problems. He steeled his nerves and opened the door slowly, walking in and looking around for his wife.
He spotted her in a chair by the window and went to stand behind her; he rested his hands on her shoulders and rubbed at the tension he found there. They didn't speak for a few minutes neither wanted to ruin the peace by saying the wrong thing. Frigga spoke finally.
"You needed to speak to me?"
"I thought perhaps we should discuss what we will do tomorrow morning if Loki refuses to go with Laufey."
"Hm. You have never been a good liar Odin. What's really on your mind?"
"You are always so perceptive my wife. I went to speak with Thor about sending the army to Jotunheim and Loki was with him. Loki….he was bathing and Thor was washing him, I am worried that they are closer than we thought and Laufey may find out. Loki was talking to Thor in a way I have not heard him talk since he was a child. Well more of a child. He…..Loki is under the impression that I just….he thinks I hate him."
"What?" Frigga turned around to look at her husband in concern. "Did you talk to him?"
"No I just overheard their conversation; Loki told Thor that I don't love him as much as I love Thor."
Frigga frowned and stroked his cheek soothingly. "I am certain Loki doesn't mean that, he just feels abandoned right now perhaps he thinks you don't love him because of all that has happened in the last few days."
Frigga sighed and rubbed a hand on Odin's left arm comfortingly. "I mean you gave him to Laufey, you led him to the harm that Laufey has caused him, and now you are sending him away from home to raise a family with the one person he doesn't want anything to do with."
Odin nodded and placed his hands on Frigga's hips and kissed her cheek. "I wanted to go to him and hold him and tell him it would be alright. I wanted to tell him that the wedding is off and Laufey could forget about ever touching him again. I wanted to but I knew I couldn't."
Frigga crooned softly. "Oh husband…..I wish we could turn back the clock but you know as well as I that if we took Loki from Laufey, Jotunheim would wage war on Asgard and there would be a bloodbath. We will have to wait to see how this plays out, we can only support Loki as much as possible through this, he must know that he will never be alone or unloved."
"My wife you are truly the wisest of all women I have ever met."
"I must be wise to be your wife."
Loki walked towards Odin and Laufey, he was holding his mother's hand while Thor led them forward. He was about to marry the Jotun king a month early! He shook and shivered but held on to the knowledge his mother had given him earlier.
Frigga walked into Loki's chambers with a large book and a leather satchel which appeared to be full. She walked to Loki and handed him both.
"Read the book now, make sure Laufey doesn't see you have it. The satchel has herbs and creams which you can use to get a bit of control in the relationship, don't use them unless it is an emergency. I love you very much dear, you cannot stop him from having his way entirely but you can make damn sure he knows your limits! I must go before Odin is aware of my absence."
She had left him then and he curiously opened the book and began to read. It was about Jotun anatomy, and Loki saw immediately why his mother had given it to him; it showed all the soft spots where pain could be inflicted and other spots where if Loki pressed discretely Laufey would be knocked out or immobilised temporarily. He filed the information away and hid the book just as the handmaidens came into his rooms to prepare him.
Now he stood before Laufey and a mage was marrying them, no vows were really said; they promised themselves to each other for as long as they lived and the mage sealed their marriage. A feast followed but it was sombre, the people of Asgard were sad to lose a prince to marriage and especially a marriage to a frost giant king. Laufey carried Loki from the great hall after they had eaten their fill; Loki looked at his mother with a grim determined face before he was out of the doors and out of sight. Frigga breathed a sigh of relief, Loki had read the book, and he would be alright.
"Are you planning on fighting with me tonight? If you are it makes no difference, I believe I have shown you that I will not be dissuaded." Laufey told Loki when they arrived at their rooms. Loki shrugged noncommittally and maintained casual eye contact with Laufey.
"I won't fight tonight," Laufey made a noise of approval and placed his hands on Loki's hips trying to draw him closer. "Because we will not mate tonight."
Loki pushed Laufey's hands away and walked away confidently towards his vanity table. Laufey stared at him in anger and shock, he slowly approached Loki from behind. "What do you mean? Of course we will mate tonight."
"No we won't, I don't want to." Loki replied primly, removing the strands of bead's which had been laced into his hair.
Laufey was staring at him in confusion, not sure how to respond to Loki's confidence. "Loki, we have discussed this, we need to mate because I need heirs."
Loki smiled at him and shrugged his shoulders. "I don't want to, I feel like having a peaceful night in front of the fire with a good book."
Loki sat down in an armchair by the fire and picked up a book about the dark elves and their war with Asgard. Laufey stood over him and stared at him silently in shock.
"Can I help you?" Loki asked looking up at Laufey.
"I don't like your tone Loki, what are you doing?"
"I am reading, you can see that can't you?"
"You know that's not what I mean Loki."
"Fine, I am asserting myself in this relationship, it is meant to be a partnership, I have an equal say in everything we do as a married couple. If that's not enough for you then try this; if you touch me without my permission again I will slit my throat and you will not have any heirs."
Laufey stared at him and seemed to be thinking it over; he knew Loki couldn't kill himself and they couldn't kill each other because of the bond but he could see that Loki was doing this as a self-preservation mechanism. He decided to roll with it he nodded at Loki and nudged at his chin playfully. "Come to bed, I won't touch you tonight if you truly want a break."
Loki looked stunned now but he stood slowly and walked confidently toward the bed he climbed in and lay down on his side facing the opposite wall.
Laufey smiled and shook his head; the boy was attractive when he was being the boss. He would honour his word and not touch Loki that night; he did feel a bit guilty about the morning's session so he would leave the boy alone for one night. He climbed into bed behind Loki and lay one of his huge hands on the covers over Loki's hip, he murmured goodnight to Loki.
Loki lay awake for a while longer.
'That was too easy, why did he just give in like that? Is he going to use the aphrodisiac again? Well if he does, I have a knife under the pillow to make good on my threat, he will think twice before trying his luck with me.'
'Hmm I doubt you would need a knife tonight, he seems to genuinely be giving you space.'
'But why? He didn't care about what I wanted before.'
'Maybe he feels guilty?'
'I don't remember creating you, are you my conscious?'
'Not exactly. I'm here more in an advisory capacity. I know your circumstance better than you really do.'
'So we're going with that? You are just a random voice I have to live with until Laufey and I get along?'
'Pretty much…'
'I am going to sleep, I must be tired to imagine you.'
Loki closed his eyes and dozed off finally. Behind him Laufey was stifling laughter. Loki was too cute when he thought he was going insane. The king rolled over onto his back and stared at the ceiling thoughtfully.
'Loki you have no idea how you affect me…'
Not that Loki wanted to have an amorous effect on his new husband but clearly he couldn't help it. They boy was sweet and naïve Laufey loved to watch him. The boy could display a variety of emotions without realising he was doing so. Like earlier in Odin's office when the king took his son aside.
Laufey had frowned when he saw Loki's shoulders sag and his eyes tear slightly at whatever Odin had said. He had felt Loki's pain through their bond and tried to soothe him, but Loki had closed himself to the contact. Laufey had been forced to stand and watch Loki being berated by his father.
He sighed heavily and looked at Loki, he was so sweet and young, how Odin could be so strict Laufey couldn't quite fathom. He knew he was going to have to take over that strict role in Jotunheim or Loki would run amok. He only hoped that Loki wouldn't take it as aggression or being nasty…
'You have to fight with him just once so he knows how much you love him. That is the way with adopted children.' Laufey shook his head and closed his eyes to sleep.