Eyes wide as they both walked into the main hall, both Fiona and August were amazed by the obvious grandeur which this mansion still possessed despite its abandoned state. It wasn't difficult to imagine how beautiful this place would have been.
"Woah." Fiona exclaimed as she eyed up the dust-covered chandelier which sat in the centre of the high ceiling, "We should probably try and find a light switch." She suggested to August as he also admired the chandelier. She could see the darkening sky outside and knew that if they weren't quick then they would soon be plunged into darkness.
Swaggering across the room at a slow pace, August did not hesitate as he headed straight towards a small lever and reached out a hand to push it down.
The lights in the room flickered for a few moments, as if threatening to blow out, before becoming solid and providing a decent source of light for those in the room.
"Wow Mr August! Well done!" Gortys rolled up to side and looked up at him appreciatively.
Narrowing her eyes slightly, Fiona crossed her arms, "Okay. Two questions. One, why does Gortys call you Mr. August, and two, why do you know this place so well?" She caught August's eye and tapped her fingers against her arm she waited for a response.
Gortys answered for him, "I call Mr August, Mr August because I respect him as an individual and because he does not call me by my name either. It is fun for both of us! I would give him a different name but the way he looks at me is a little scary sometimes so I do not want to offend him."
"The little robot is right," August nodded, his nose-ring flashing in the light, "and I know this place cause I robbed it when I was a kid with my Ma. She had me come round and scout the place out as much as was possible before she bust in and took what she could."
"Should have known that was going to be your answer," Fiona muttered, "So who was the owner?"
"Some crabby old witch who had enough children to form a damn militia. And she did. This...wasn't an easy mark. She died 'bout a decade ago and her brats took everything and disappeared. I came back once a few years back to look for the hidden treasure bu-"
"Hidden treasure?" Perking up, Fiona's eyes started to dart around again. "What treasure? You wouldn't hold out on me would you August? What treasure?"
"There were rumours the old bat hid her most precious stuff from her kids, I met one of 'em and they told me that it was true but no one had been able to find it." He grazed his hand across the balcony which decorated the stairs leading up the first floor. "So I though i'd give it a try y'know?"
"Find anything?"
He grimaced. "Did I fuck. Spent almost a full week here and got nothing."
"Nice. Well...we may as well have a look while we are here." Fiona concluded.
August snorted in disagreement, "And how do you think you're going to find in a few hours what I couldn't in a week?"
Straightening her back, Fiona sent him a smirk, "It will be easy. You were alone in your search and I have both you and-" She cleared her throat and shouted over to the little robot who had zoomed away to look at some broken chairs, "Gortys!" She called.
"Yes?" The robot replied, turning to face them.
"Gortys! Can you scan the room for any hollow nooks? Any space which could be used to hide treasure would be perfect. Thank you my cute little friend." She asked, tone coloured with affection.
"For you Fiona, I would do anything. It would be my pleasure to scan the room."
Whirring frantically, Gortys moved to the centre of the room and turned in a very slow circle, making sure to cover each section of the space within her sight as she scanned.
Fiona and August watched patiently, their excitement over a possible score heightening both their skills and their senses.
Eventually Gortys completed her scan and she beeped excitedly as she zoomed back over to the duo. "My sensors have located a false panel in the western wall beside the large painting. Aside from that there are no other panels or hidden areas in this room."
"Perfect, thank you Gortys." Fiona nodded as she raced over to the area which had just been described.
"August, if you wouldn't mind?" She asked, holding a hand out expectantly at the small section of wall.
"Sure lady." Pulling his fist back, he punched a hole directly through the soft panel without much effort. "Easy."
Using her hands, Fiona pulled more of the soft wall away so that they could both peek inside the small alcove.
"Gortys, some light please?"
As Gortys held a small light up to the area, it soon illuminated a rolled up sheet of paper and Fiona reached in excitedly to pull it out. Rolling it across the floor, she was greeted with the sight of a rough map of the mansion with several small areas on it dotted and marked out.
Fiona threw her hands up in the air in victory, "YES! I knew I could find it! See August! We women always know where to look for these types of things. I am Fiona, the queen of finding treasure!"
"Yeah sure whatever," August replied, rolling his eyes, "so which of these places do we check out first?"
"I vote we start with the furthest away and work our way back to here in the main hall. It gives Sasha and the rest some time to find us."
"Screw em! Lets just go now and when we have the treasure we can show them it. Not fast? You're last." August grinned as he rolled up the map again and started to leave.
"Mr August, that does not seem like a very nice way to think of things but I love you anyway." Gortys scolded in a pleasant tone.
Barely able to stop himself making a face, August replied, "Thanks little robot."
x-x-x-x-x
Huffing as he stepped over another small box of junk, Vaughn was careful not to lose his balance and drop the woman who had attached herself to his back like a barnacle.
Mostly because she'd probably kick his ass if he dropped her.
They had been vaguely exploring the large attic which they'd been dropped in with a mixture of curiosity and disgust. Most of the boxes had been filled with old, useless scraps of metal but anything that looked like it might have a little value had been collected by LoaderBot.
Since they started their search, the robot had been virtually silent as he mourned the re-loss of his legs but Sasha and Vaughn payed him very little attention.
"Try that box over there." Sasha directed and she squeezed her knees against Vaughn's side to direct him, "C'mon! Onwards my valiant steed!"
Vaughn turned his head to look at her, "Seriously? I feel emasculated here! I don't deserve this." He complained but followed her line of direction regardless.
Bending down, he placed her gently on the ground next to the unopened box, "Hey LoaderBot, you okay there bud?" He placed a hand on one of the hulking yellow arms.
Stopping beside the pair, LoaderBot looked up at him with a blank stare before his head tilted towards his missing legs, "I am fine. I am working on my upper body strength. You are my inspiration Vaughn."
"Is he making fun of me?" Vaughn pouted. "Et tu, LoaderBot?"
Pulling the lid off the large box, Sasha gasped as she saw what was inside.
"Clothes! Aww man, look how old these are," she pulled out various items and her expression was filled with joy as she giggled at them, "Jeez Vaughn! Look at these!"
"Wow." Vaughn laughed as he picked up an old-style dress, "This is kinda...cool...i suppose." He lifted the dress high and yet it still trailed across the dusty floor. "Either the woman who wore this had massive spider legs or I am much shorter than I think I am. I'm not short am I?"
"That's a maxi dress." Sasha tilted her head as she examined it. "It's designed to be long enough to hit the floor."
"You, uh, didn't answer my question." He paused. "Sasha? Am I short?"
Humming contentedly as she avoided his gaze, Sasha bopped her head from side to side.
"Fiiiine." He sighed. "I'm short."
"I didn't say anything," looking up at him her eyes were dancing with mischief. "Do you see this?" She held up another dress, "I got my first kiss in a dress kinda similar to this. Felix had bought it for my birthday." She looked wistful for a moment before shaking whatever thoughts she was having from her head and holding out her arms again. "C'mon Mr Universe, time is wasting away."
Vaughn rolled his eyes as he bent down and allowed her to assume her previous position on his back. Amused by her nostalgic expression, he cleared his throat. "So who was your first kiss? Not that i'm trying to pry or anything but you looked happy and-"
"It's okay Vaughn," she soothed to stop him from going into an awkward apology, "my first kiss was disgustingly sweet. Her name was Amanda and she was another trainee con-artist."
"Your first kiss was a girl?" Vaughn couldn't keep the shock from his face and he wondered if Rhys knew he could have competition from the other sex.
"Yeah. And she stole my heart," she swayed dramatically, "I'm totally kidding. She did steal my watch though."
"One of the cons of being a con." Vaughn quipped.
"So what about you, Admiral Triceps? You ever kissed another man?" Sasha asked, voice teasing.
"What? No." He answered instantly but Sasha could detect a hint of shiftiness.
"Are you really trying to tell me that you've never kissed another guy? Really? Realllllllly?" She dragged out in a disbelieving tone.
"No! I've never kissed another guy," Vaughn denied vehemently before muttering to himself, "well I suppose there was that one time with Rhys but..."
"YOU'VE KISSED RHYS!" Sasha screeched in his ear, causing him to flinch and drop her on her ass.
At he unexpectedly let go of her, Sasha fell to floor in a heap but she barely felt the impact as she continued to yell, "SERIOUSLY! When?!"
"I never said that!" Vaughn backtracked immediately as he shook his head in denial.
"I heard you Vaughn! Tell me what happened," jumping to her feet Sasha started to advance on the panicking accountant as he backed away from her slowly, "I love gossip!"
Eyes darting around as he planned an escape, Vaughn realised that he was trapped and a loud sigh escaped him, "Look, we were locked in one of the supply closets up on Hyperion overnight by some dick and when we woke up some stuff happened after it turned out that we wer-," he cut himself off as he realised that she was no longer limping, "Hey! What happened to you ankle?"
Pausing her advance, Sasha glanced down at her ankle and moved it from side-to-side, "Huh. I guess it wasn't sprained. Bummer. Thanks for the carry though."
"No problem," Vaughn agreed quickly, pleased to have moved away from their previous topic of conversation.
Spotting the door which would lead them from the attic, Sasha let out a loud victory cheer. Bolting over to the door, she yanked it open and was greeted with a spiral staircase which led downwards.
"YES! C'mon lover boy! Lets get outta here! You too LoaderBot." She exclaimed as she threw off the veil which was still decorating her hair.
Thumping forward, LoaderBot allowed the duo to pass in front of him and he shone a small light on the stairs as they started to descend.
x-x-x-x-x
"So, what is our plan?" Rhys asked for the fourth time in as many minutes.
"I know i'm not actually really there," at his side, Jack was the first to answer, "but, hey Rhys listen to me, you're kinda starting to sound like a whiny little bitch."
"Was I asking you though?" Rhys responded, throwing the hologram a dirty look. "And I don't sound like a little bitch. I sound like a man who is concerned about a plan."
"No, you sound like a bitch." Athena butted in, "And for the fourth time, I am trying to locate some stairs for us to make it back upstairs."
"Why is it taking so long? Can't you just, I dunno-" He made some vague slashing movements with his arms and gestured around him. "Use your assassin skills."
"To create stairs?" Her tone was incredulous and Rhys pouted as his idea was shot down.
"Aww Rhysie! I once had a friend who came up with some real crappy ideas, and I mean real crappy. He tried to tell me that having a killer trap door was a waste of money," Jack threw his head back as he laughed, "Man you should have seen it. He quickly changed his tune when he was falling through it a few weeks later. Handsome Jack is the king of practical demonstrations."
"No, Handsome Jack is king of being a dicknozzle." Rhys bit out, clenching his teeth as he dodged a low-hanging web.
"Really? A dicknozzle? That's your best effort," Jack frowned, "I though we were past this sweetheart?"
"Past what? You still being trapped in my brain after trying to kill me and steal my body. That's kinda hard to get over."
"Well you were the one who chose to be over-dramatic and destroy my entire legacy." Jack shrugged. "I am entitled to a little bit of anger, sweetness."
"Are you fu-"
"There!" Athena cried suddenly, stopping the argument between the pair, and pointed at a small hole in the opposite side of the room which they had just entered.
Rhys squinted his eyes as he looked at the hole and he could vaguely make out the shape of some stairs in the light of the other room.
Finally!
For the first time since he landed in this disgusting basement he felt something akin to hope.
"Lets go then! I am so, so, SO ready to get my ass out of the creepy basement!" He fist-punched the air in victory as they walked across the dark, damp room.
"You think this is creepy?" Athena raised an eyebrow, "Kid how have you even made it this far in these adventures?"
"HEY! I have a winning personality and I am wicked good with a stun baton. You should try me some time!" He puffed his chest out in pride.
"I very well might take you up on that offer." She said seriously, turning to hide the small smile of her face as she heard Rhys intake suddenly.
"Wait what? I wasn't being seriou- It's just a thing you sa- Please don't kill me." He cursed his own stupid mouth. If he was lucky, Athena would only maybe beat his ass in a private setting away from the rest of the group.
He doubted it though.
Crouching beside the hole, Athena measured it carefully, "I will go through first and make sure it is safe." Without waiting for him to respond, she crouched lower and rolled through, leaving him alone.
Confident that she couldn't see him, Rhys rolled his eyes and cracked his knuckles, "Okay then. Lets go. Just need to roll across the disgusting, disease-ridden floor and escape through." Tucking his non-metal arm into his stomach he crouched and prepared to follow Athena.
However, just as he was about to push forward, a large creaking sound drew his attention and he glanced up in surprise. The large sheet of metal which was dangling precariously atop some other old junk came into sudden view as it fell from its shaky position.
"Well i'm outta here, try not to die. Ciao!" Jack saluted and disappeared instantly.
"AIIIEEE!" Rhys screamed as he threw himself backwards, narrowly missing the sheet as it sliced past his body and blocked off the small hole.
He watched with a comically shocked face as various other heavy objects were disturbed by the metal and also came to fall in place in front of the hole.
Unable to believe his luck, Rhys tangled his hair in his hands. "Umm...Athena? Helloooooooooo?! You there?" Rhys bellowed and he could hear the panic in his own voice as he was thrust into utter darkness.
He waited for a few seconds but no reply came.
"Well...shit."