As usual, sorry for the long wait. I've been trying to be an adult. Not going quite as well as I wish it was but that's just life.
I'm sorry for making you guys wait for so long and, hopefully, next chapter won't take as long as this one did.

Wasn't beta'd so all mistakes are my own.

Chat to me on Tumblr if you feel like. I'm queer-as-in-fuckyou.

Chapter 5

The first thing she noticed when she woke up the next morning, was the bright sunlight coming inside the room through the window. She forgot to close the goddamn blinds again.

The second thing she noticed, was the empty bed she was laid on.

Turning her head to the side, she stared at the empty space beside her. The sheets were wrinkled and the pillow was tossed sideways; the only reminders of the body that occupied that space during the night. She sighed heavily and threw her arm over her eyes. Pursing her lips, she thought that ultimately, she deserved that. Clarke had been quite clear when she told her she would be her one night stand and honestly, it didn't surprise her waking up to an empty bed. In fact it reminded her of herself, of what she did so many times in the recent past. Just slip away while her lover for the night still slept. The thing she didn't understand was what was this weird feeling that crept her mind. Why was her chest feeling so heavy? This makes no sense.

She sat up and rubbed her eyes, and that's when she noticed the third thing: Clarke's clothes were still on her bedroom floor. Tilting her head to the side a little, she brought her legs to the edge of the bed and pulled the sheet around her still naked body. She reached for the bedside table and grabbed a small black hair band and secured her brown locks in a bun. As she was pressing herself up, she saw the bedroom door clicking and opening. She watched as Clarke walked in wearing nothing but a button up white shirt, two steaming cups on her hand.

The fourth thing she noticed was Clarke's shy smile. And she wondered to herself if this girl's smile would ever not affect her. She took one of the cups from the girl's hands and smiled as she sat by her side.

"Did I wake you up? I was just really craving some coffee," Clarke said as she sipped from her own cup. "I hope you don't mind me going through your kitchen, but you looked so peaceful, I didn't want to disturb your sleep."

"It's ok. You didn't wake me up, the sun did. And I don't mind you going through my kitchen, especially if you're gonna bring me coffee. Thank you."

They sat in silence for a couple of minutes, drinking their coffee and Lexa couldn't help but think that she could easily get used to this. Never before she had woken up to still find a lover by her side, let alone having said lover walking around her flat wearing only a shirt and making her coffee. Her heart started beating a little too fast when she realised the kind of thoughts in her head. She started to realise how scared she was. She spent so long having pointless encounters, trying to find some sort of connection, and when this connection finally appeared, she noticed how much the idea of it scared her. The silence started to make her feel uneasy so she searched her mind for something to say.

"I thought you'd left. I woke up and you were not there."

Well, that was not exactly what she wanted to say but then again, since meeting Clarke, Lexa seemed to have lost all ability to function as a normal human being.

"Why? Because that's what you do to your one night stands?" Clarke said, raising an eyebrow and grinning.

Lexa followed her with her eyes as the blonde stood up and put her now empty cup on the bedside table. She put down her own cup and raised both hands in surrender.

"Guilty of all charges." She said, smiling. "But you didn't leave."

"No, I didn't." Clarke replied as she started picking up the rest of her clothes from the floor. "I'm gonna tell you a secret. I don't really do one night stands."

"Oh?" It was all Lexa could say to the blonde's revelation. In all fairness, what happened last night felt like anything but a one night stand. It was so much more than that. And right now Lexa caught herself wishing that Clarke felt the same.

"Anyway," the blonde continued. "Do you mind if I quickly use your shower?"

"Of course, it's right over there." She pointed to the door on the far right of the bedroom wall.

"Maybe you want to join me?" Clarke asked, as she walked towards the door.

Lexa breathed deeply and thought that she would probably follow the blonde wherever she asked her to. What the fuck, brain? You just met her! This is not possible! But then, she looked at Clarke walking and god, she looks beautiful when she walks, she looks beautiful with no trousers on, she looks beautiful with morning hair and husky voice. She just looks beautiful and Lexa is so gone, so damn gone. She heard the bathroom door click closed and stood up, ready to follow the blonde into the shower and wherever else she wanted her to, but the noise of her doorbell going caught her attention.

Grabbing the white shirt that was discarded on the floor the night before and putting it on, she paced quickly through the bedroom and the living room and stood in front of the door, reaching for the knob to open it. In a second, Lexa's eyes went wide and her mouth dropped opened. She blinked a couple of times as if the person standing in front of her would disappear, as if it was some sort of illusion.

"Mother? What are you doing here?" She asked in a complete state of surprise.

Indra walked inside the apartment and looked around with suspicious eyes. Without a word, she ventured further in and walked towards the bedroom. Lexa hurried her pace and put herself between her mother and the bedroom door, a slight despair showing in her body language.

"Mum, listen, I'll just get dressed quickly and we can go out for coffee?" Lexa tried to avoid the unavoidable, but it was pretty much a lost battle. Indra lowered her gaze to meet her daughters and pushed forward, making the young woman move away from the bedroom door. With a deep sigh, Indra looked around the room, seeing the bundles of clothes all over the floor, her gaze pausing at the bathroom door, obviously hearing the shower running.

The older woman turned around and faced her daughter one more time. Her eyes were filled with something the Lexa knew all too well; disappointment.

"Why am I not surprised, Alexandria?" She asked. "Why am I not surprised to come to your house on a Saturday morning and finding this?"

Lexa faced the floor, not responding to her mother. To be quite honest, she was pretty sure that was a rhetorical question. She knew there was a storm coming her way so she just lowered her head and took it.

"I've had enough. Do you think you would be able to hide your little bar wrecking fiasco from me? That was the last straw, Alexandria. You were supposed to be coming to work with me, you were supposed to learn everything about our company so you can one day take my place."

"That is not what I want, mum!" Lexa said, her voice shaking.

"I've given you everything, girl! Look around you! Expensive clothes, luxury cars, a life of parties and what not! All you are and all you have is because of me! And what have you done to deserve any of this? Nothing! All you managed to do on your own is causing a bar fight!"

"That's not true. I got into university, I'm starting in three weeks. I got scholarships after you said you wouldn't pay for it. I'm doing my best, mother. But if it's not to be CEO in Woods Inc, nothing is good for you. Well guess what, I don't care. I'm not working at the family company and you have to accept that!"

Indra sighed deeply closing her eyes and shaking her head.

"Very well. You give me no other option, Alexandria. If you insist in being reckless and irresponsible, you will have to do so with your own money. I'm cancelling your credit cards and pulling out the standing order to your bank account. I'm not investing one more penny on your lack of common sense."

"I don't need your money." Lexa said, full of rage.

"We shall see about that. We shall see how long you can keep this lifestyle you lead without an income as large as what I provided you."

"I have savings, Mother. I have the money my father left for me."

"Silly girl," Indra said with a grin on her face. "You manage to keep this place because your bills go straight to my direct debit. You use the company card to put petrol in your cars. It won't be long until you realise that you can't keep this up."

"I will figure it out. On my own as always, because I clearly can't have your support and understanding."

"You had my support and understanding for long enough, Alexandria. But if all you can do in your life is waste my money with alcohol and cheap prostitutes," she said, pointing with her eyes towards the bathroom door. "I'm afraid I won't support that."

Lexa felt her stomach turn. For a moment, she had completely forgotten Clarke was still in the bathroom. There was no more noise of water running so she was pretty sure the blonde was able to listen to quite a chunk of the conversation. She felt her cheeks going warm and her palms getting sweaty as embarrassment started to take over her body. This whole ordeal was just fucking brilliant, wasn't it? Probably by now Clarke was thinking how much of a useless waste of space Lexa was. Poor rich kid. Spending mummy's money with an extravagant lifestyle. That was just too much. The brunette clenched her fists making her knuckles go white.

"Get. Out," she said between her teeth. "I don't need your money. In fact, I don't need anything from you. Just leave me alone."

Indra laughed loud, shaking her head once more.

"Fine, Alexandria. Have it your way," the older woman started moving towards the door, into the living room. "Whenever this delusion of yours is over, come meet me in the office and we can start talking about your future."

Lexa practically slammed the door after her mother stepped out and leant against it, closing her eyes to hold back the tears that were trying to come out.

"Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck fuck!" The brunette repeated the words while knocking the back of her head against the front door. She knew she was truly and monumentally fucked. She had some savings, yes, but it was not nearly enough to run an apartment like hers, with the lifestyle she had. If her memory was correct, the money she had saved would allow her to keep it up for two or three months tops, and to be completely honest, she had no idea what she would do.

In the middle of the whirlwind of thoughts, the quiet voice of Clarke brought her back from the mind storm she found herself in.

"Hey," the blonde said, leaning against the bedroom door frame. "That was intense," She said with a smile.

"Clarke." Lexa said, standing up straight. She knew Clarke had heard the whole thing and she was not in the mood for someone pitting her. "I think you should go," she said, her gaze meeting Clarke's.

"Oh?" Clarke frowned, caught by surprise by the brunette's sudden change of demeanour. "I mean, I'm sure you're pretty fucking pissed off at your mum but I thought we were having a good time."

"You had what you wanted, Clarke. You had your one night stand so if you can, please, get your things and leave, as you well heard, I have a lot of figuring out to do," Lexa said, moving her gaze away from the blonde's.

"Hey, it's ok," Clarke took a couple of steps, getting closer to Lexa. "I can help you figuring shit out, I have quite a lot of experience in this to be ho…"

"I don't need your help or your pity," Lexa said dryly, interrupting the blonde.

"What the fuck? I don't pity you, Lexa!"

"Sure you do. Poor fucking rich girl, isn't it? What does she know about struggle. She doesn't even work or do anything other than drinking expensive whiskey and spending money," Lexa spat. "I know pretty damn well what everyone say about me and do you know what? Fuck everyone. I don't need anyone's help and I surely don't need anyone's pity. You had what you came here for, you can leave me alone now."

Lexa looked at Clarke and instantly she felt the weight of her words. She looked into those damn blue eyes and she saw surprise, she saw confusion but she also saw hurt. And she didn't quite understand why or how but there was definitely hurt there. Hurt that she caused just now with her words. Maybe Clarke was telling the truth, maybe she really didn't pity her. But now it was too late. She watched as the blonde put her clothes on and gathered her things, making her way towards the front door. The hurt Lexa seen in her eyes was even more visible now and she swears she could see tears pooling in the girl's eyes.

"Fuck you, Lexa."

And with these three words, Clarke walked out the door and slammed it behind her.

Lexa took a deep breath and walked back to her bedroom, slightly massaging her temple to try and ease the headache that started to grow. She had a lot of thinking to do. She needed to figure out what she was going to from now on, without her mother's financial help. Surely there were options. Surely she would be ok. Wouldn't she? University started in three weeks and she knew one thing for a fact: this was the sort of stress she really didn't need right now.

She decided that, at the moment, calling Any was her best option. The woman was her cousin and the closest thing to a best friend she had. Any had helped her sorting out the university funding and she would, for sure, help her to fix this situation. Lexa crouched down to get her phone that was still in her trouser pocket. As she pulled the device, a small piece of fabric fell out. She looked down and saw Clarke's undone bowtie spread on the floor. Taking it in her hand, she stared at the object for a few seconds before taking another deep breath. She couldn't help but think about the blatant hurt on Clarke's eyes right before she left. It was not supposed to be this way. Tightening her grip on the bowtie, she looked at her phone screen. She knew she had to call Anya and start organising her life, but another look at the small piece of fabric and all resolution was gone.

"Fuck…," she said with a sigh.

Searching her contacts, she found the name she was looking for and brought the phone to her ear. It only rang a couple of times before a masculine voice echoed on the other end.

"Lex, what's up?"

"Hey Lincoln! Do you happen to know what company was doing the catering at the event last night?"

Fuck her life. It can wait.