WHAT WENT DOWN
Anders stared at the letter in his hand. "Fenris..." The elf took it from him, stared at it, as well.
"I don't... I want... I can't... " Anders' throat was thick, closing around his words. Fenris nodded, not even trying to speak.
Dorian spoke. "Would you like me to read it aloud?"
They nodded. Dorian took the envelope, and sat across from them. Anders and Fenris gripped hands as Dorian leaned forward, and began to read. Even through Dorian's smooth voice, they heard Varric's flat Kirkwall accent.
"Dear Anders and Fenris,
"In my heart, you'll always be Blondie and Broody. Always the bickering elf and mage who fought with us, bled with us, drank with us. But, no doubt you're different people, by now. I don't know what all you've been through, but I'm pretty sure it was pretty bad. I don't know if you're still Blondie and Broody. I hope one day to find out.
"This is a letter I've hoped to write for over four years, now. Nah, that's not really true. These are the words I've wanted to say to you for over four years. But, as things lie, a letter will have to do.
"I have thought of that fateful afternoon in the Hanged Man, every day since. Asking myself why I trusted Hawke, why he did what he did, what I could have done differently. Answers come and go, but the truth of it is, it doesn't matter. It went down the way it did, and nothing I do will change that. Maker knows, I want to. We all want to.
"When Hawke agreed to give Fenris to Danarius, I just didn't believe it. Literally, I didn't believe that was actually what he was doing. I was sure it was a ruse, on both your parts. Then, when he threw Anders at him, I knew it had to be. He was setting the Magister up; it was a trap the three of you had arranged ahead of time.
"Then, you were gone.
"'What's the plan?' I asked, when the door closed. Hawke stepped to the bar to order a drink.
"'What plan?' he replied.
"'Giving Blondie and Broody to the Tevinter asshole, Hawke. What's the next step?'
"'There's no next step, Varric. Those two have been pissing people off since day one. It's good riddance is what it is.'
"We all looked at each other; Rivaini, Daisy, Aveline and I. Turns out, they'd thought the same thing that I had. I mean, why else would he have done what he did? He gave you to that bastard, and we'd just watched you walk out the door, waiting for Part Two of a plan that didn't exist. We stood there in shock for a second. Then, Daisy, screaming like a varterral, picked up Hawke's ale, and brought the tankard down on his head. Dropped him like a stone. Bless her soul, I've never been prouder, I swear.
"We all agreed we were going after you. Aveline couldn't. Hawke had gotten pretty tight with Meredith. The only thing keeping the city from chaos, at that point, had been Aveline. If she personally moved against a visiting dignitary, as well as thwarted Hawke... well, we couldn't have Hawke putting her position at risk. She made for the Keep, to send reinforcements. We made for the docks, to get you both back.
"Of course, it wasn't easy. Danarius had a lot more men with him than had come into the tavern. His rear-guard was a block long, I swear. Isabella ran around parallel streets to get ahead and flank them, while Daisy and I picked them off from behind as best we could. It wasn't easy. We both took hits. When we cut through enough to see Rivaini... she was like a blur. You should have seen the way she fought to get to you. I've never seen her in such a fury, before or since. See, we'd all stood by her, even after she'd left to find the Qunari tome. She was repaying that debt, come Hell or high water.
"Reinforcements showed up, then; Donnic with a hefty compliment of guards. With them, we were able to gain ground on the Magister, and nearly had him at the docks. We caught a bare glimpse of Fenris as he boarded the ship, that white hair of his stands out. Then, a retinue of Templars closed the docks for all embarking and debarking. 'To prevent hostilities to the Tevinter ship', they said.
"Donnic couldn't order the guards to attack the Templars. No ships were going out, except the one you were on. Rivaini was hurt pretty bad, but she hailed us all to follow to her ship sitting at dock. She had no crew, at that point, but a couple of the guardsmen had been fishermen in their youth. We picked-up a couple more sailers willing to make a sovereign. They, Donnic, and the rest of us went aboard, and managed to set sail. Donnic, he fought like a madman through the streets. Guess you two'd gotten close, Fenris, playing cards every week. The idea of you returning to slavery... well, he couldn't let that happen.
"Now, we've all heard Rivaini boast about her captaincy, but I'm telling you now, it's not an empty boast. That woman can sail. She had us all manning whatever it was she had us manning, and we were hard out of the harbor. The Tevinter boat had already passed through, and was heading to sea.
"As we were bearing down on the Twins, that damned chain net-the one you hear about, but have never seen-starts pulling up. We can see the chains on the pillars moving, no idea how deep the net is. Daisy's shooting ice at the things, slowing the rise; Rivaini isn't slowing down a smidge. Some-damn-how, we slide right over it. We could hear the chain scrape along the keel as we sailed through the pillars.
"As soon as we were out of harbor, we saw what we were up against. Danarius wasn't alone. He had a damned armada with him. Alright, it wasn't an armada, but he had a half-dozen ships surrounding his. We were sailing light, and made good time catching up. As soon as they spotted us, several of those escorts swung around to meet us.
"They had cannon, and they had mages. I can only assume the cannon were stolen from Qunari vessels during hostilities. We had Rivaini, Daisy, and Bianca. Somehow, and to this day, I don't know how, we fought through those three ships. Rivaini was like a goddess of the sea, commanding the wind and current to her bidding. She had Daisy focused on taking down the sails and masts, Bianca was taking out the cannon handlers and mages... Donnic took shrapnel through the leg. He lived, but still has a limp.
"We lost a lot of time in the skirmish, but as soon as we were clear, it was full sail after you, again. Two of the three remaining escorts circled back as soon they caught sight of us. It was over pretty quick. A cannon barrage and some firebolts took out our sails, and one mast. A final barrage took down the main mast, and we were dead in the water. The escorts turned, and headed back to the Tevinter ship. We sat there, and watched you disappear over the horizon.
"Damn, I'm sorry. We're all so damned sorry.
"We were adrift for a day, when a merchant ship came across us, and towed us back to Kirkwall. Rivaini had the name of the ship you were on, and we searched for its home-port. It was an Antivan ship, likely a hire. Rivaini tried, but part of hiring transport from Antivans is their discretion. No one would say where you made port, or if there was a known address for the passenger.
"I set every international contact I had on the case. Finding Danarius' estate wasn't all that hard, he's well-known. The problem was that he had about a dozen estates throughout the Imperium, and twice that elsewhere. Trying to isolate where he'd gone with you was tough. Even I only have so many contacts.
"I even wrote to the Grey Wardens. I was sure they'd get involved, if one of their own was taken by a Tevinter slaver. No dice. They were sympathetic, of course. But, Anders had left the order of his own accord. Tevinter is a touchy country, regardless, and the Wardens keep a strict policy of non-political involvement. They couldn't, or wouldn't, help.
"Aveline tried to get the rest of the Free Marches involved, knowing Meredith would fight Kirkwall's involvement. Neither of you had a claim in the Free Marches. Anders was an apostate refugee, Fenris was a Tevinter slave, now returned to Tevinter. There was no legal precedence, although one would hope that ethical precedence might prevail. It didn't.
"My network picked up some rumors about Fenris, but you two seemed to disappear. It's not easy to get information in the Imperium. The best source of intel is from slaves and the poor... and, they won't talk. Too afraid of the rich that govern them, I guess.
"Hawke... damn him... got weirder and weirder. When the Annulment was called on the Kirkwall Circle, he fought alongside Meredith. The rest of us didn't. We fought for the mages. Of course, at the end, she turned on Hawke, and then it was all about 'the team', again. Well, whatever. It worked. The bitch went down. She's still down, kneeling in the Gallows courtyard, a statue of red lyrium.
"I kept contact with Hawke, if for no other reason, than to keep an eye on his craziness. Rivaini set sail, after repairing her ship. The sailors we'd hired to help the day you were taken, stayed on as crew. They'd never seen a better captain, and jumped at the chance to serve under her. In more ways than one, no doubt. Daisy went with her. She just couldn't stand to stay, after you left. See, she'd already lost her entire Clan. When Hawke handed you over, it was like it was happening, again. That's why she tried to kill him with his own tankard. Sometimes, I wish she'd succeeded.
"Aveline and Donnic stayed in Kirkwall, and they've been the greatest source of strength and sanity this city has had, ever since. If they weren't there, I don't think I'd have accepted the Viscount nomination.
"We all talked about what went wrong with Hawke. Nearest we can figure, it all started with Leandra's death. It seemed to set him on a downward spiral. He was alone, and you know how much family mattered to him. Why he wasn't able to turn to us as family, I don't know. I can only hope he found a peace in his death that he didn't find in his life.
"Ever since you left, I kept my ear to the wall. It was harder when Corypheus showed up. All of Tevinter was a hotbed of political unbalance, Venatori this, Inquisition that. My men couldn't get a peep out of anyone. Plus, I was in the ass-end of nowhere, fighting alongside our beloved Inquisitor. I'm glad you've had the chance to know her. She and Sparkler are good people. Hearing you were with them... well, it made me believe good things can happen in this world.
"Anyway, eventually word got out to my contacts that Danarius had died, and his estate was being divied-up. My men got there as soon as arrangements could be made. They were too late to find you. The officials who'd handled the estate division had left. Nothing but a small crew of cleaners, left in the house. But, a couple of his former slaves on the crew were actually willing to talk.
"They confirmed that, yes, you'd been in the house for years. But, as far as they knew, Danarius had killed you both. You were seen once, before he died, and then, service to your cell was suspended. As far as they knew, you were dead. Rumor was, you'd been sacrificed in a blood ritual.
"We mourned you. It was damned hard news to hear.
"Then, today, Eve told me she and Dorian have you... shit. Nothing has ever made me happier. I mean it. Not a Maker-damned thing.
"What I want most in this world, is for the two of you to live good lives. To beat whatever horrors you've had, and find happiness. What I want second-most, is to sit down with you again, over a game of cards and a pitcher of ale.
"I'll leave this letter, here, now. You have only to ask, and... well, I'm here for you. All of us are.
"Varric."
When Dorian stopped reading, the room was silent. Fenris felt empty and full, at the same time. Anders' face twitched, his hand in Fenris' shook.
Fenris spoke. "Thank you,Dorian."
Dorian held the letter to Fenris. "Of course."
"Excuse us," the elf said, and led Anders to their room. He stripped them both down, tucked Anders into bed, and held him. He rubbed his back, waiting. Then, as Fenris anticipated, Anders began to weep. Fenris wept with him. He didn't know if it was joy, guilt, something else entirely... they just cried.
With the exception of Hawke, Fenris and Anders hadn't been betrayed, after all. All of their friends had fought for them. They'd been injured trying to get to them. They'd risked death, and drowning in the open sea to find them and bring them back.
And, then, they'd kept looking. Even through the end of the world, Varric kept looking.
Their tears finally dried, and their hearts healed that much more.
tbc...