"Why, oh why, did Ikuno's parents think this was a good idea?" I ask, stepping closer to Hisao and wrapping my arms around my chest in an effort to ward off the chill wind whipping between the tall buildings. The temperature is not helped by the fact that it's not even sunrise yet.

It's so early in fact, that Hisao and I had to say our goodbyes to his parents last night. At least I'm leaving on better terms than I arrived.

"Well, the traffic can be fairly chaotic in the mornings?" My boyfriend shrugs, wandering away from me and the bags to pace back and forth between the patches of orange light. Even at this hour a steady stream of traffic trundles by on the road in front of us, the sudden glare of their headlights replaced by the curious looks of their drivers. Though with malice or interest born of boredom I can't be sure.

Either way their gaze makes me feel increasingly uncomfortable. This isn't the rebellious night of my home town, where I could run free, protected by a knowledge of the streets and the silence that ruled there. Here, it's different, here I don't want to be alone.

"Hisao," I say softly, keeping my voice level. I cannot let him know I'm unnerved.

He turns on the spot, his eyes darting expectantly to the road, before settling on me.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I say holding out my hand for him to take, "Just cold and tired."

"Me to," he replies with a warm smile, locking his fingers with mine, "Your hand's freezing," he says in surprise.

I shrug stepping forward to rest my forehead against his shoulder. "So is the rest of me, that's why I've got you, to keep me warm."

"Good to hear I'm useful for something," I feel his body reverberate as he laughs softly.

I close my eyes, content to leave Hisao on watch duty. My mind is half asleep, but my body feels restless. I'm torn between my comfortable position lent against my boyfriend and an insane fantasy, running off into the night until I feel right again. There's only so much energy that can be burnt on a video game.

Hisao's lips gently brush the hair on top of my head, causing a tingle to run down my frigid spine. It took him a long time to find his initiative, but it was worth the wait. I give his hand an appreciative squeeze.

"Chin up," he says suddenly, "I think this is for us."

Opening my eyes I look to the road, where a black limo is pulling up against the curb. This almost makes getting up super early worth it, almost.

Wordlessly the driver - a finely suited gentleman - unfolds himself from the car, before opening the back door for us. This is either excellent service or the most polite kidnapping in history. We move to pick up our bags, an action that finally spurs our chauffeur to break his professional silence.

"Please, make yourselves comfortable," his voice is soft but clear. "I'll see to your bags momentarily."

"Um, okay, thanks." Hisao says nervously.

I mumble my own thanks and, still holding Hisao's hand, climb into the squishy leather interior of the limo. My mouth falls open as I take in my surroundings. Joining me on the sofa-like bench that runs the length of the car my boyfriend looks equally impressed. It's a little like sitting in a mobile version of the up market shops Ikuno is so fond of - rich wood varnished to a mirror-shine is inlaid with intricate trails of blue, which shine through every gap and joint in the decor. Directly in front of us a small fridge sits below a work surface, the glass door revealing an astonishing collection of beverages.

"I was expecting a taxi," Hisao says hoarsely, leaning back into his seat with an impressed look.

"She never does things by half." I grin, my boyfriend in his slacks and black sweater looks very suited to this type of transport. Looking down at my simple t-shirt and ripped jeans I feel suddenly very scruffy.

The driver shuts the boot with a soft thud, and a few seconds later he is climbing back into the driver seat.

"No," Hisao grimaces, "She can't even arrange to have us picked up at a normal time."

The driver turns in his seat to face us, his brilliant turquoise eyes falling curiously on me. "My apologies for the early hour. Young Miss Komaki seemed to think this was a rescue mission, needed in quite some urgency."

My eyes meet his, and I realise he's much younger than he looked under the shadowy streetlight - perhaps only a few years older than Hisao and I. Then again I suppose that's why he's on the graveyard shift.

"Really?" I ask, taken aback by his age and the frankness of his statement. For some reason I was expecting a more or less robotic response, conceived amongst the convoluted rules of etiquette - not that I know any of the rules, mind.

"Indeed, she and her father had quite the row over the arrangements. Had she had her way I believe you would have been picked up last night." He finishes speaking with a grin, before his face morphs into a uniformed look of horror. "Would it possible, if it's not to much trouble of course, to omit telling anyone I told you that? I fear I spoke out of turn"

His way of speaking reminds me of Ayumu. A depressing fact in of itself. But I get the impression this young man's extended vocabulary comes with the job, rather than a desire to make himself sound smarter than everyone else.

Which probably wasn't Ayumu's reason either, but I find it hard to remember him with anything other than contempt. All those beautiful memories are tainted with the husky voice of my replacement.

"We won't say anything," Hisao says, an equally mischievous look slipping onto his face, "If you do something for us."

I blink at him, mouth slightly open. What the hell is he planning?

"What did you have in mind?" The driver asks nervously

— — —

As it transpires what my ever thoughtful boyfriend was planning was a trip to a drive through fast food restaurant. Where we bought possibly the most unhealthy breakfast I've ever had. Processed egg, bacon and what was apparently supposed to be sausage all sandwiched in a greasy bun. If I had an excuse to run before I have even more of one now. The food is delicious though. And it's acquisition via blackmail does nothing to take away from the taste.

"Thanks," I call to the driver as we pull out of the car park. "Your secret's safe with us," I add as an afterthought.

"Appreciated," he replies, "I will give you two some privacy."

With a gentle whine a black panel slides up out seemingly nowhere, separating us from our talkative driver. I think he just wanted to get away from the smell of the food.

I lean back on the sofa, taking a competitive bite of my burger. Beside me Hisao does the same, and side by side we enjoy our breakfast as our luxurious transport glides easily through the traffic, under a sky caressed by the first hints of daybreak.

I think I could get used to this.

— — —

With a deafening crash Tatsuo's truck rips through the last of the construction workers' pedestrian defences. The tires roar on rough ground, suddenly the sound and vibrations cease, replaced by an all encompassing silence. We hurtle towards the dark water…

I wake with a jolt, monetary lost in time and space as the blue lights of the limo swim into view. My hand feels like I'm clutching a red hot cannon ball, which I'm unable to let go.

"Are you okay?" Hisao's voice reminds me that I'm not alone.

Rolling onto my back I find myself staring up into his concerned face. I must have fallen asleep on him - again. Though quite how my head ended up resting on his lap like a strangely textured pillow is anyone's guess.

Nodding slowly in response, I push my stump into my stomach. I don't want him to see me in pain. Unfortunately the phantom has other plans, and I wince as my imagined fingers twist and bend in unnatural agony.

Putting down his book he tentively moves his hand to my head. With the gentleness I've come to expect from his touch he runs his fingertips through my hair. The shivers racing down my body battle with the shocks being indiscriminately delivered by my disembodied hand.

The pain is visible on my face as I use my stump to push myself up. My boyfriend's expression darkens with worry, but my lips find his before he can voice his concern. A distraction works where no pain killer will. Closing my eyes I explore his smooth cheek with my fingertips.

"I should let you fall asleep on me more." He mumbles between hastily stolen kisses.

"Mmmm, you should." I'm surprised - not to mention embarrassed - by how hungry my voice sounds. It would be lying to say I didn't want more - and more intimate - physical contact between us. But he wouldn't rush me, so I won't rush him - even if it's surely tempting.

"I'm sorry for interrupting," the driver calls. His clearly amused voice causes both of us to jump, and quickly return to our seats; redfaced and bashful. "But we are about ten minutes from our destination, if you wanted to make yourselves look…" He pauses to think, "presentable."

Okay, more physical contact, less company. I think that's a plan I can work with.

— — —

"Miki!" Ikuno almost screams as I step out of the limo, sinking into the gravelled courtyard with a crunch. Before I'm even able to register the mountain of white wood before me I'm struck around the middle by a brown haired bullet.

"It's so good to see you!" She says excitedly, her arms wrapped tightly around my chest.

"Mmm-hmm," I manage to say as I exhale what very likely could be my last breath. At least she's keen to see me.

After what feels like an extremely long time she pulls away, and I at last get a proper glimpse of her, or better of what she's wearing. A pair of figure hugging black trousers, with a lining of tougher looking martial disappear under a black blazer much like we have at school, but clearly at a much greater cost.

I peer down at her high leather boots, and suddenly I can't help but laugh. "So you do have a horse!"

"No! Well okay, but they are my mum's really."

Unbelievable.

"And you two get to ride them." Ryouta's announces gleefully. Standing behind his girlfriend I hadn't noticed him. I half expected to see a matching riding outfit, but he seems to have gotten away with jeans and a t-shirt. Which might be just as well. I'm not sure I would have survived my fit of laughter.

"Ryouta!" Ikuno cries in exasperation. "I was going to tell them."

I share a sideways glance with Hisao, who raises his eyebrows at me.

"Is that why you got us up super early?" I ask, "To ride a horse?"

"Not exactly, I just wanted to see you. You don't mind do you?"

Looking up I notice Ryouta give his girlfriend a worried look. Well, that's odd. I'm not sure I entirely believe her motives, but her excitement is infectious - if not a little overbearing.

"I suppose not, let us take our bags inside, and then we can come and see Sorbet and Lemon drop."

A wide smile blooms across my best friends face, "That's not their names! and don't worry about the bags, we have people for that."

Well, that was a little rude of her.

"Are you sure?"

"It's what they are paid for, come on I can't wait for you to meet them." Without another word she hurries away, linking her arm and her boyfriend's stump.

Hisao and I follow, at a more relaxed pace. I could argue with Ikuno, but it's no use. Once her mind is set on something it's almost tragic to disappoint her. Like stealing a saucer of milk from a kitten.

Without really thinking about it I take my boyfriend's warm hand, and together we stroll around the 'beach house', though it's nothing like the small stilled structure that once belonged to my grandmother. In fact there's something distinctly out of place about the mansion, it's definitely not built in any style native to Japan. Constructed primarily of white wooden planks and grey slate tiles it reminds me of an idealised American ranch, like something out of Ryouta's movies.

"So," I say elongating the vowel as I struggle to get my mind back on track, "Do you know how to ride a horse?"

"No, never really thought I would need to."

"Do you think it will be a problem that all animals hate me?" I ask, only half in jest. I once engaged in a prolonged campaign of trying to get the neighbor's cat to like me, operating under the old adage that we would grow on each other. Despite my best efforts the only things that grew where the malevolent creatures malice and the latticework of scratches that covered my arms.

"Don't know what you're worried about, pets aren't allowed in our apartment building."

"Just, don't let it eat my other hand." I say, trying and failing to sound serious.

"Deal, as long as you stop it kicking me in the chest," Hisao replies in equal mock sincerity, managing to keep up the act fractional longer than me, before bursting into laughter. I hadn't thought about his heart. Ikuno and Ryouta don't know about Hisao's condition, as far as I know. Should I say something? It would be a great way to piss off my boyfriend, but at the same time I was silent about my dad. And look how that turned out.

"You okay?" Hisao asks as we pass a shallow yet wide pond, sunk into the courtyard that sits in the middle of the manor. How much did this place cost? More than I could ever even dream about probably. I stare intently at the ghostly shapes of Koi carp gliding effortlessly under the simmering water as I consider my response.

"Are you sure it's safe for you to ride a horse?" I ask tentatively.

"Oh," he falters, misstepping and tripping. I grab his arm to steady him. "I will be fine, how about you? Will you be able to hold on?" There's a harshness to his voice that he seems to imminently regret, his eyes flashing dangerously before sinking to stare at the ground in the next moment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean-" He starts, but I cut him off.

"Even if I fall off, I bounce, you know?" I explain as gently as I can. It's not like I wasn't expecting his reaction. I hate to be told I can't do something, no reason Hisao would not be the same. Still, there's no getting around the fact that my boyfriend's mistakes - however unfair it might be - have a higher price on them than mine.

"I promise to be careful." He says, a smile returning to his lips.

"Extra careful," I reply as we pass through yet another car sized gap in the behemoth sized building.

"Extra, extra careful." He nods.

"And I want a kiss as soon as you're done, to prove you're alright."

"Deal."

— — —

"We're going too fast!" I blurt in a hushed whisper, afraid anything louder might alarm Kuri, the chestnut mare that is currently saddled underneath me.

"We're barely walking," Ikuno says at a normal volume from the ground beside me, a stupid grin on her stupid face. How did I let her talk me into this?

"Shhhh," I say desperately, "Her ears are moving!"

Ikuno's giggles. If I somehow survive this encounter I'm going to kill her. "Anyway I thought you liked running fast?" She asks, her large eyes glinting.

"I do, when it's my legs doing the running, I don't trust this thing."

"Awww, poor Kuri, you're not a thing are you?" Losing all sight of reality my best friend begins to talk to the horse as if it were a child, a child moreover whose feelings I just hurt. Apparently satisfied that the horse has been adequately apologised to on my behalf Ikuno clicks her tongue - the only piece of communication in her entire tirade to register with the mare.

Almost at once we begin to move faster, so much so that Ikuno has to gently jog to keep up. Don't fall off, don't fall off. I desperately suppress a squeal as I'm bounced up and down in the saddle, feeling like I will be flung sideways at any moment.

"Ikuno," I whimper, no longer able to keep up my facade.

My best friend finally catches on to how uncomfortable I am, and a few thoroughly unpleasant seconds later the horse begins to slow. Ikuno apologises unnecessarily as she leads Kuri back to the stables. I make a token effort at explain it's not her fault, but I'm distracted by a burning desire to get back to solid ground.

I leap off of Kuri almost as soon as we reach the stables, ignoring the neatly dressed stable boy and his outstretched hand. The feeling of mud - or at least I hope it's mud - under my feet is exquisite, as I stagger away from my mount. I take a few deep breaths, feeling foolish for my reaction.

"Are you okay?" Ikuno asks rather hopelessly; a sad defeat in her voice.

Closing my eyes I force my composure back onto my face before I turn to face her.

"Yeah, just not sure horse riding is my thing." I smile weakly, strolling over to her and Kuri, who eyes me with mild interest. "Can I stroke her?" I ask.

Ikuno blinks at me, her eyes reigniting. "Sure, but I thought you didn't like her?"

I tentatively reach out my hand, prepared for the pain that normally follows my attempts to bond with an animal. However Kuri seems to relish the attention and makes no move to stop me gently stroking her wide head.

"I like her, riding her freaks me out though." I say, my heart rate slowing, along with the thundering in my ears. Somewhere in the paddock behind me Hisao and Ryouta are talking delightedly, apparently not at all put off by their equestrian partners. And somewhere the subtle sound of the sea rolling in and out. I had almost forgotten this was a beach house.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Ikuno offers - though it's easy to see she's reluctant. It's a mark of our friendship that she would skip out on something she loved to hang out with me.

"Nah, I'll watch from over there." I gesture to the grassy man made mound that runs along the length if the vast gardens - or at least as far as I can see, the open paddocks and fields fade into a thick forest with no signs of a boundary. I suppose being able to see the edge of your land from bedroom window is something reserved for the poor.

"Are you sure?"

"Very, go have fun!" I say, finally pulling my hand away from the horse. Who - and I might be imagining this - looks a little disappointed.

— — —

The mound turns out to be steeper than it append from ground level, and I almost slip while clambering to the top. However I retain my balance and reach the gently curved peak with dignity - and all other major appendages - intact.

Oh... Wow.

A strong breeze, infused with sea salt hits me as I look out over what has to be one of the most beautiful sights I've ever seen. From this vantage point it's possible to see the entire beach, in all its curving white sanded majesty. It looks like the front cover of any number of travel brochures made real and enhanced far beyond what any photograph could ever show.

I sit down, letting the neatly trimmed grass tickle my palm, while allowing the chaotic sounds of the stables behind me fade to nothingness. Focused only on the sea, which seems to murmur rather than roar. Why the hell is this view obscured from the ground?

The question digs at me until I'm hit by a slightly stronger gust of wind, which flutter my hair back and plays at my neck and suddenly exposed ears. Is it for the horses benefit? That would make sense, I never felt any unexpected blusters while I was riding. Thank goodness. Still, I think I would rather have a cat and this view.

It's hard to tell just how long I spend watching the surf rolling over itself on the shoreline. But my eyes start to feel increasingly heavy, despite having slept in the car. I guess I'm so used to constantly hurrying about that my body interprets any respite as an opportunity to catch up on some much needed sleep - can't say that I blame it.

I lay back in the grass, overcome by a sudden but complete sense of peace. Clouds drift lazily overhead, seeming to match my own lethargic state. The only thing that could make this better would be a warm Hisao to curl against. My cheeks warm at the thought, and the heat only becomes fiercer as I hear someone climbing the hill behind me.

It's a little risky to be so touchy feely, especially because I've not yet met Ikuno's parents - still, we could have fun seeing how close to the line we can get without crossing it.

I'm cast in shadow, and with a mischievous grin on my face I look up and behind me.

"Ryouta?" I exclaim, sitting up so fast I feel momentarily dizzy and almost end up flat on my back again. Ryouta places a steadying hand on my shoulder, making sure I'm not going to pass out before slumping down beside me.

"You look half asleep, Hisao been keeping you up half the night?" He asks in his normal cheerful tone.

"Yep," I yawn, thinking about our long talks on the balcony shared by our rooms at Hisao's apartment.

"Really?" Ryouta's face suddenly comes alive with a mixture of delight and curiosity. Like a little boy on christmas morning.

"No!" I say quickly, almost shouting as I catch up with his ridiculous double entendre. "I thought you were riding around with the others?" I ask, rubbing my eyes with my stump.

"It gets dull after awhile," he shrugs, "It's not really my thing."

"Nor mine," I smirk, "So you decided to come and annoy me instead?"

"I can go if you want." His voice is suddenly cold, and he makes to get up. The hell?

Without thinking I grab his thin arm before he can stand up fully, pulling him back to the ground.

"Get off me!" He almost snarls, though his pudgy face betrays not anger but hurt.

"No!" I say, my voice breaking a little, "What the hell, I wasn't being serious! How long have you known me?"

With a sigh Ryouta stops trying to pull away, and I feel confident enough to let go of his arm. Peering over my shoulder I check to see if our friends have noticed the confrontation on the top of the hill, but they are both still riding. Now cantering up and down one of the larger paddocks in a display that makes me feel instantly queasy. I turn back to my plump friend, only to find him staring forlornly into the distance. I haven't seen him this upset since…

"Has something happened between you and Ikuno?" I ask, remembering the look he gave us when we first arrived.

"No, not, exactly."

"What does that mean?" I ask.

"It's just, well, you've seen this place?"

"Parts of it, yeah?"

"I could never afford to live in a place like this." He sighs.

"Neither can ninety nine percent of the population, what's your point?"

Bloody boy is only ever this cryptic with things that upset him, everything else goes from brain to mouth without a second thought.

"My point is that Ikuno is used to living like this, she's used to ordering the staff around and never having to worry about the cost of anything."

"I had noticed that about her," I say, "But I still don't really understand what you're getting at."

"I can't give Ikuno the life she's used to." he replies mournfully, pulling blades of grass from the ground one by one.

"About the only person on her pay scale is a prince." I shrug, still not all that clear on what's upsetting him so much.

"She should be with a prince."

How on earth has he managed to get himself so down? We're on holiday.

"What? A spoiled brat that has had everything he ever desired handed over straight away and has never had to struggle a day in his life? No, Ikuno doesn't need that. What she needs is someone to keep her grounded, to make her feel safe, and most importantly, she needs someone to make her smile." I smile a little at the shocked look on Ryouta's face. "She loves you, no amount of money will ever change that."

He goes to say something, but stops himself, staring rather sheepishly at his shoes instead. Most people don't realise that Ryouta's carefree confident attitude is a mask for a whole boatload of self doubt - I didn't, not for a long time. I turn my attention back to the crashing waves, far off in the distance.

"Thanks, Miki."

"You're welcome, I suppose I should be the one to make you smile once in awhile, huh?" I say with a smirk.

"I knew I was letting you hang around with us for something." His tone is serious, but he can't keep the grin from his round face.

"So, what do your parents think of all this?" I gesture vaguely in the direction of the house, as if it wasn't clear.

"Oh, hmm, I think they were a bit overwhelmed to start with." He shrugs, "But they seem to get on well with the Komaki's and my little sister adores Ikuno, she'll probably like you as well."

If children are anything like cats she won't.

"Never really had much experience with little kids," I mumble.

"Nah, you two have a lot in common, you both run fast and throw massive tantrums when you don't get your own way!"

Ryouta rolls onto his knees to avoid my punch, laughing his head off as he does so.

"Too slow, anyway, I'm going to go see the others, wanna come?"

I consider his offer. If for no other reason than to deliver the missed punch. But I'm in no hurry to get back to the horses, and anyway it's comfortable here.

"Nah, I'm good. Have fun."

"You sure?"

I nod. I try not to be actively antisocial, but sometimes it's nice to treat myself. Breathing in deeply, as if the sea air were a fine wine to be drunk before it spoiled I listen to Ryouta's descent down the hill. I half expect to hear him slip and fall over, and I find myself tensing, preparing to run to his aid. However the sounds of shoes against gravel indicate he has arrived safely.

After his footfalls have faded I once again allow myself to sink onto my back, before stretching my arms out above my head. The breeze and feel of ticking grass the only sensations that seem to matter. If I could just lie here, like this, until the end of time that would be just lovely.

Unfortunately that wish is interrupted by yet another person climbing the mound. I really hope it's Hisao this time.

"Hey," Ikuno says, "Could we talk?"

I feel like signing, but instead sit up smiling at my best friend. Who looks just as downhearted as Ryouta did. The thought of turning her away crosses my mind, after all I'm hardly in the best position to be doling out life advice. But what kind of friend would I be if I did that?

So I gesture for her to continue, finally understanding why she was so adamant for me to arrive.