Feliciano's throat had wanted to break out a horrified shriek to express his hurt. So much like somebody had died. This man in front of him, just stood there,

Again, like a stranger. This man he had, just now, just a few seconds ago, given his heart to through his lips. It had melted so heavenly. And now it shattered even more brutally.

There was this man in his coat, completely unaware of the hurt and pain of his opposite, completely oblivious to the thoughts racing through his brain and piercing down into his heart and guts.

"I... I... excuse me, I hadn't known, that... this is a gay bar?" He pointed towards the white and ill looking tiles under his feet like this joint on the men's bathroom floor there holding the whole picture together was the manifestation that this was indeed a place for gay men.

"Yes."

He had just played along with it, let Feliciano kiss him, like humans sigh and shake their head when a horny dog tries to mate with their shinbone. It was useless. Feliciano felt stupid. Once again. And the fact was that, with this kind, wonderful, attractive man, he felt more used than ever with any other asshole. Even though it wasn't even intended. From one minute to the other the kiss didn't exist anymore. The portal to the new dimension had shut and the remaining energy around them collapsed.

"I am sorry."

"It is alright." a small smile curled upon the tan one's lips. A tad awkward, but a very polite nice, a very normal smile. But normal meant in no way real.

They could still become great friends, now that that small meaningless and dreadful chapter of their beginning was erased, couldn't they?

Feliciano washed his hands, like he did some normal toilet stuff and dried the snot off his face with a paper towel, wiped his hands on his too-tight trousers. How senseless.

They disappeared into the pub, just like they had casually met on the loo. A small business talk, how the weather was, in a gay bar.

Feliciano was angry. So very angry and sad at the same time. He couldn't even really tell why. It was just the case. Like it was just the case that the beautiful stranger was straight. Straight like a ruler. And he cried like a little dog over that fact. And about him being gay and stupid. And unfortunately gay for that beautiful stranger. And and and...

And his big brother overheard him. Because he was even too dumb to cry quiet enough. There had been times when he had wanted his brother to hear him, when he had wanted it. But now, of all times, that wasn't the case. No. He wanted to grief alone.

"What is it?"

Feliciano took a breath. A deep and long one, for a moment he almost wanted to spill it all out uncontrolled like his tears.

"...Nothing."

"Why are you crying then, idiot."

So reminiscent.

Lovino hadn't worked at the bar today. He wouldn't have approved. He said Feliciano shouldn't go to muscleheads. All machos. All idiots. Feliciano wished he could say that he was right, but that blonde boy had done nothing wrong.

"It's..."

"So tell now, bastard, I don't have all night, I have to sleep, I have to work, you..."

When Lovino was worrying, he became aggressive.

"Just a heartache. I got... turned down."

"Oh...o-oh." Lovino sighed, sounded relieved and annoyed at the same time.

"That'll go away. ' wasn't worth it then. Probably some bastard again, I know my idiot-brother's taste." he cursed, but he smiled. And he left. And in that moment Feliciano wanted him to stay. But Lovino had to sleep. And to work... it would go away.

No.

It wouldn't.

Lovino knew this. He closed the door and leaned against it. His brother cried often. Had been a little crybaby and stayed one. But he had never cried like this. Looked like this. He should go and kill that bastard. He should go and kill that other one too. Because he all knew too well by own experience that... sometimes it didn't go away.

"Why did he kick me out? I didn't do anything wrong..."

"You provoked me."

"I? You were just absolutely blunt and rude."

"You were overly present."

"Excuse me? I was just sitting there when you came around like-"

"Psst.", Feliciano raised his hands and everybody obeyed, "I know a kebab shop just 'round the corner where we can go and sit down and eat, sí?"

"Why would I want some -"

"Ok, we'll go." Gilbert grabbed his brother and Feliciano by the sleeves and dragged them along.

"Hey! Uh..." Roderich solved his crossed arms, looked if anyone was seeing him and then dashed after them, "Wait for me!"

He was not a fast runner. When he found the restaurant, the three were already sitting round a table. It was not hard to find them, the kebab shop's windows were glowing brightly into the night and the tables in the eating area were quite lonely. No one was sitting there, only a dude who seemed to be extremely wasted sat on the counter and slept.

The chief of the restaurant was quite happy and whirled around them, even though everyone only ordered a simple classic kebab. Feliciano knew this shop quite well. He had often been here, in the middle of the night, crying about his brother being, in general, an asshole, his grandfather not accepting his sexuality, asshole-men, heartache... He couldn't go to any Italian restaurant because he feared they would tell his grandfather everything. And his grandfather didn't like his... gayness. When he had nowhere to run to in the middle of the night, he had just walked around, crying and was asked by the kebab man out of the selling window towards the street what the heck was wrong. And he was invited to free food and a packet of paper tissues and someone who listened.

Gilbert still stared at the guy who seemed to be called "Roderich". God, the name screamed priss. He sat there, with a straight back and his hands folded in his lap. Gilbert asked himself how the hell he would eat a kebab. His mouth seemed too tiny. He would get tzatziki sprinkled all over his lips. He would wipe the residue flour of the bread away and get red stains on his white skin. He would get herbs stuck in between his teeth. He would have to open his mouth wide, his lips would stretch and bruise, to get it some way in, somehow... - oh god.

"Brother? Are you alright?"

Gilbert wiggled his legs nervously and clenched his hands.

"Yes. Yeah, just a little... hyperactive."

"Roderich" glanced sideways at him. The fluorescent lights of the shop reflected in his glasses. His look caught on Gilbert's hands clenching around the rim of his chair.

"Just'a little.", Roderich mumbled for nobody to hear except Gilbert and glanced up from the clenched hands to look the albino directly into his eyes. Ludwig and Feliciano were talking about something.

"What did you say?"

"Me? Oh. Nothing. Nothing at all.", and then he smiled again. This time his lips and eyes were smiling, surprisingly. In the next moment he started to wiggle his legs to in a similar manner like Gilbert. The albino reached out his hand, aggressively and pressed down one wiggling leg at the knee. He's making fun of me, he's making -

What he didn't expect, though, was Roderich's own hand placing itself on top of his and caressing the back of his with the thumb. The thumb. Thump. Thump. He retreated his hand immediately. Horrified he looked over to his brother. Had he noticed something? No. He hadn't. He was talking excitedly with Feliciano. Deeply enveloped into conversation with the kind cutie.

Check, his brother hadn't noticed.

A pair of slender voluptuous lips leaned its way towards Gilbert's ear and while the hot breath caressed the skin enough, the voice caressed the rest: "My territory, my rules."

Gilbert sat straight like a soldier on his seat immediately. Like someone had shot a lightning up his spine.

What the...? What the hell - who the fuck, uh... who the fuck did this guy think he was exactly?! He wanted to say something, opened his mouth, but thought he should better think his words through with that... that... maniac! But he should say something now because otherwise the battle is lost anyway, you cannot strike back one week later after the enemy attacked! But, but, but his tongue got tangled in his dry mouth, he could not even swallow anymore, his shirt collar was too tight and blocking all of the air. He knew the signs all to well, but that had nothing to do with him, it had been all just way too long and that man was fogging up his mind and confusing his brain with his stupid tactics. All that this Roderich wanted was to make a fool out of him. Delivering a punch into the ribs, right under the heart saying "Look, here, here's your pride."

Here's a longer chapter. Maybe you'd like to tell me, if you like the shorter or the longer ones better. I am thinking of turning that whole thing into a bigger AU. This part could contain GerIta, PruAus and Spamano, while I am thinking about a second one with FrUk, UsUk and Franada. Also, I think about starting a blog. If all of that happens, you'll get to know at least through my profile.

When this is going to turn into a big thing, I should search for a beta reader. Someone who'd like to be one? Message me, please. Please excuse any mistakes. I tried to correct every single one…

I originally wanted to post yesterday, but I guess all of you have heard of Munich… I was shocked and very very sad. It was probably "only" a person running amok with no Islamist background, but horrible nonetheless. He called out on Facebook before for especially young people, who he would "treat at McDonald's".

#PrayForMunich