A/N: This chapter would've come out yesterday, but for some reason when I tried to save a good portion of it the site decided it had better things to do than what it's actually intended for. I had to rewrite a bit, but had a blast doing it regardless. Without further ado- A less serious chapter!

Corrin swiveled to his left, admiring his dapper appearance in the mirror. His long, unruly white hair was tied back into a slick ponytail, and a white suit and bowtie adorned his body. He wore black dress pants and two supremely uncomfortable black shoes. All of this preparation may have seemed pointless to outsiders, but Corrin felt he had to look his best even if the party was a somewhat casual event.

Satisfied with the results of his primping, Corrin turned to his younger sisters for approval. "How do I look?"

Sakura blushed. "I don't know why you're asking us, b-but I think you look great…"

Elise beamed. "You look ready to party! Maybe you'll finally meet a girl prettier than me!"

Corrin laughed at his sisters' words. "Thanks Sakura… And, Elise, I doubt I'll ever meet anyone more beautiful than my little sisters."

"Aww, thanks! I guess we have to leave now, right?"

"Yeah… speaking of which, how'd you get here?" Corrin asked, suspicion tinging his voice.

"We… um… took the subway?" Elise suggested dubiously.

"Yeah, right, I know how Father feels about you doing that. He'd never lend you the money to let you ride the subway. Who drove you?"

Sakura stared at her feet, cheeks burning in shame. "W-we got Elise's friend Odin to drive us."

If Corrin was drinking anything, he would've spewed it everywhere. "WHO?!"

"Odin, you know, the transfer from a school he calls the 'halls of darkness?' He's really nice… and he's old enough to drive us!"

"The Halls of Darkness… The bloody tragedies that occurred under cover of night in that foul haven of evil! It makes my blood ACHE!"

"GAH!"

Corrin jumped high enough to touch the ceiling with his palms if he had tried.

"WHAT THE HECK?! HOW DID YOU GET IN?!"

Odin stretched out his hand in a theatrical motion. "The Dark Lords granted me a portal through which our fates could cross!"

"The Dark Lords are about to grant you a BLACK EYE if you don't GET OUT OF MY APARTMENT!" Corrin shouted.

"Big Brot- I mean, Corrin! He's just saying that he climbed in through the window! No need to get mad!" Elise attempted to defuse the situation.

"How is that even possible? I'm on the third floor!"

"The secrets of my Dark Magic cannot be revealed to the unenlightened!" Odin laughed, though his confident facade began to falter when he caught Corrin's enraged gaze. "Yes, in fact the, um, Dark Lords might not enjoy my spending time in-"

"Get. Out."

"Y-yes! Going!"

Odin made a hasty retreat, nearly knocking over Corrin's potted plant decoration (a pitiful, withering daisy which happened to be the only flower he could reasonably afford in the shop he searched in). He fumbled with the doorknob before stumbling out the door, into the hallway, and out of sight.

"Corriiiiiiiin!" Elise whined. "Why were you so mean? He won't like me anymore!"

"So that's what this is about?" Corrin quirked an eyebrow.

Elise huffed and looked away.

"I suppose it's none of my business… but stay out of trouble, hear- Oh, SHOOT!"

"What?!" Sakura asked, startled.

"I'm gonna be LATE! It's six o'clock… and the party starts at six!" Corrin made a mad dash to the door, entirely forgetting the appetizer that he had prepared as a refreshment for the partygoers. That is, until he bumped into the edge of the tray, sending it cascading dramatically in an ungraceful fall to the tile floor below. A large glob of hummus plastered itself to his clean white suit, but Corrin didn't even notice. "Ughhh… Sakura, mind cleaning that up? Thanks bye!" He whipped open the door and rushed outside, only to lean back in the door moments later, snatching up his car keys. "See you for real this time!"

Corrin's two younger sisters stared at each other until Sakura finally spoke.

"Do you think he noticed-"

"Nope."

"Then shouldn't we-"

"No reason, he'll figure it out soon enough."

The drive to Orochi's was hectic. Corrin swerved in and out of traffic, avoiding drivers even more frantic than him as he simultaneously attempted to make sure his hair wasn't frazzled or ruined in any manner. These things take a great deal of time and effort, you see- impeccable hair is indispensable when attempting to pull off a civilized and gentlemanly appearance. At least, that's what the celebrity on TV always said- the one with white hair and all of the 'best hair' awards? The name was on the tip of Corrin's tongue, but he had larger fish to fry. Such as how he was going to explain being thirty minutes late to the festivities to his best (and arguably only) friend.

At six twenty nine, Corrin pulled into the driveway of a violently violet home. Multicolored lights pulsed from the windows, combining with the blaring music to make the house seem alive as it throbbed and thumped like a massive purple heart. The thought made our white haired protagonist shudder.

The scent of cigarette smoke wafted into Corrin's nose as he opened the door to his car and stepped out. He caught sight of a blonde-haired woman with an absurdly disproportionate chest (how did she even balance, being that topheavy?).

The woman glared at him. "Whaddaya want? You got a problem with me smoking?"

Corrin shook his head. "Of course not, ma'am," he answered politely. He strode past her and up the sidewalk leading to the front door, wary of her stare which lingered just a bit too long for his comfort. He rapped on the door, but either no one could hear over the music or they were just otherwise occupied. Instead of waiting for someone to open the door for him, Corrin pushed it open and walked inside.

The music, a mixture of multiple styles which Corrin couldn't identify, was deafening regardless of its contents. "Gah! Why is it so LOUD?"

"I don't know… but don't care, either. And I would appreciate it if you would move out of my personal space."

Corrin glanced around, trying to identify the source of the noise. No one appeared to be making eye contact or otherwise drawing his attention. He shrugged and took another step forward, only for a hard object to collide with his gut and knock the wind out of him (not without a little bit of his macho pride, as a small squeak escaped his lips as he was hit).

"Just WHAT do you think you're doing?!" the voice from earlier demanded. "I ask you to get out of my personal space and you take another step towards me!"

Corrin, clutching his stomach, glanced downwards. A young girl seeming no older than 12 was glaring upwards at him. She was at least a head shorter than him, which explained why he couldn't see her earlier. "Um... hi? Sorry about that, I couldn't see you since you're-"

"Yes, I'm well aware of my height," the girl snapped.

"So... what are you doing here? Did your older sister just graduate?" Corrin asked, attempting to lighten the mood.

"...I just graduated from college. I am AT LEAST as old as you."

Corrin could tell from the girl's tone that she was seething, so he chose his next words tactfully and carefully, taking into account how sensitive this girl appeared to be and how the mention of her appearance seemed to aggravate her. "...Sorry, you just don't look any older than 12."

The slap heard around the world resonated throughout the party. The surrounding partygoers stopped their activities and stared, while others saw them abruptly halt and walked over to see what the big deal was. Corrin found himself surrounded by curious guests.

"Heh... Hi. We were just having a... misunderstanding," He explained awkwardly.

The girl's black hair swept behind her as she huffed and stormed away through the crowd. "I didn't catch your name!" Corrin called weakly after her.

The crowd suddenly parted as a brown haired man barreled through like a blind buffalo.

"Hey, Corrin, you're LATE!" Hinata called, oblivious to the tense atmosphere. "...And I didn't think yellow and white was your style, but it suits you!"

Corrin glanced down at his suit and noticed for the first time that he had hummus plastered to the front of his suit. "What the..."

"Like I said, it SUITS you! Get it?! Suits?!"

The crowd surrounding them literally groaned at the pun, most of them dispersing as they assumed the interesting bit had passed. Hinata grinned.

"It's about time you showed! I've got Oboro practically EATING out of my hand!"

"I think he means that he's spent the night being thoughtlessly rejected," Oboro called from across the room, somehow hearing them over the music courtesy of Hinata's loud voice.

He scowled. "Okay, well, maybe I haven't been the most successful, unlike THAT GUY over there!" He motioned to a silver haired man with earrings, who was currently sitting on the couch with his arms around two girls, looking particularly smug. "But I have a plan! We're going to the kitchen!"

This piqued Corrin's interest. He had never been the life of the party, but he could make his way around a kitchen with the best of them. "...All right, I'm listening."

"I'm going to make a romantic meal to share with Oboro. That's SURE to win her over!"

Hinata seemed immensely proud of his plan. Corrin, however, was doubtful. "Sure, that might work, but you're forgetting one key element- you're a terrible cook."

The brunette snapped his fingers and pointed at Corrin. "That's where YOU come in! YOU'RE GONNA COOK FOR US! Isn't this plan ingenious?!"

Corrin sighed. "There's no romantic value if you aren't putting in the work yourself to make the meal."

Hinata took a moment to think. "Then how about you TEACH me how to cook?!"

The snow-haired protagonist looked offended. "Cooking is an art, which cannot be taught in a single sitting! It takes years of experience and learning to even qualify as a simple-"

"Just one dish, Corrin!" Hinata pleaded.

Corrin was about to refuse again when he caught Hinata's gaze- that of a sad puppy. "... I'll teach you to make clam chowder. It only takes an hour maximum, but I can do it in less."

Hinata's ear-to-ear grin returned. "Thanks, man!"

"First, I'm going to need you to grab these ingredients from the pantry-" Corrin handed Hinata a list and motioned vaguely to the left, "-and hand them to me as I request them."

"Got it!" was Hinata's cheerful reply as he swung open the pantry door. "Let's see..." He glanced about the confined area, which was stocked to the brim with quality items for the creation of exquisite dishes. "Butter," he pocketed a stick of the substance, "diced onion," he grabbed a bag of white particles, "celery... hmm..." Seeing nothing of the sort, Hinata instead picked up a cucumber, shrugging. "This oughtta do!"

Corrin let out a massive yawn. "I guess all of today's excitement is finally catching up to me..."

Hinata entered moments later, brandishing a sack of flour and his pockets stuffed to the brim.

"Ah *YAWN* Hinata... Back already? Would you be angry if I didn't explain everything I'm doing? I'm kinda tired..." Corrin yawned for the third time in a minute.

"Sure thing!" Hinata affirmed.

"All right, first I'm going to need..."

Corrin proceeded to mix all of the ingredients in the proper order, hardly paying attention to what he was doing. I could really use a nap after this, he mused internally. When everything was prepared, Corrin left the concoction to boil in a pot. Alarmingly, a putrid stench began to waft from the mixture as it heated. "Hey, Hinata, are you certain that you have all of the right things?"

Hinata shrugged nonchalantly. "I couldn't find everything, so I improvised. It's no big deal!"

"You WHAT?!"

"I did the best I could!" the brunette snapped defensively.

"You shou-"

Their argument was cut short by a yell emanating from the pantry. Corrin's eyes widened. "Uh oh."

"What?"

"XANDEEEEEEEER!"

Someone's shout pierced the air, sending a chill down Corrin's spine.

"HOW DARE YOU STEAL OUR INGREDIENTS?!" the voice roared.

"I DID NOTHING OF THE SORT!" a different voice roared in return.

"Nononononononono..." Corrin took off in a sprint towards the pantry, leaving a confused Hinata in his wake.

"...What just happened?"

Corrin threw open the pantry door to witness two fully grown men in chef hats pointing various cooking instruments threateningly at each other. The brown haired man, brandishing a soup ladle, was pointing it accusingly at the other man, a blonde. "You scumbag! I should've known your dishonorable chain of garbage heaps would try something despicable like this! You would sabotage our ability to serve the guests?!"

"YOU speak to ME of honor?" the blonde man shouted back, waving his pair of tongs. "Your restaurant is the one cheating ours out of ingredients!"

A faint gurgling noise surfaced behind Hinata. He turned to witness the pot of clam chowder beginning to bubble over, raising the lid of the pot.

"Um... Corrin? Is it supposed to do that?"

The shouting in the pantry grew louder, and, almost as if it was mirroring the atmosphere of the situation, the mixture in the pot began to quiver violently.

"Corrin?!"

The white haired individual in question was currently standing in between his two brothers, holding out his arms in a placating gesture. "Ryoma, Xander didn't take your ingredients, and vice versa. This is just a misunderstanding; Hinata grabbed the wrong things by accident. If you would just put down the utensils-"

"Has he brainwashed you, Corrin? You honestly believe Nohr is above such lowly schemes?!" Ryoma interrupted.

Xander stared at his brown-haired counterpart with disdain. "He is lying to you, Corrin- Hoshido is the true perpetrator here."

Corrin sighed in exasperation. "You need to listen to me. It was nei-"

"ENOUGH!" Ryoma yelled. "It is time you pick a side! There are only two choices: us, or them."

"Brother, choose us. Ryoma is only concerned with the glory of his great father and his restaurant, whereas we in Nohr value the bonds between our employees above all," Xander coolly explained.

"Choose us; the proof of Nohr's vileness in in his words! They are fed to him by our disgusting stepfather, like pureed carrots to an infant!" Ryoma urged.

"Nohr!"

"Hoshido!"

"NOHR!"

"HOSHIDO!"

"SHUT UP!"

Both of Corrin's brothers were instantly silenced. They stared at him in shock, not knowing him as one to be easily angered. The fury in his eyes was not commonplace for the younger sibling they both knew and cherished. "Both of you, just stop! You're acting like-"

"AAAAHHHHH!"

Xander and Ryoma donned confused countenances. "Pardon, I didn't quite catch that," Xander stated.

"I said, you're acting like-"

"AAAAAHHHH!"

"What is that yelling?" Ryoma queried. Receiving no answer, he dashed out of the door, his two brothers at his heels.

A shadow loomed over the trio. A tall, slimy object emitted a repulsive gurgling sound as something struggled inside of it.

"Hinata?!" Corrin shouted in disbelief.

"MMMMMFFFF!"

"What..." Xander found himself at a loss for words. The slime slowly began to advance upon the three. Before it even made it halfway, however, the door to the kitchen swung open.

A pink haired woman ducked her head in. "I heard a commotion in here, which is rare when I'm not in the kitchen to drop all of the dishes and make a racket-"

She halted her monologue to stare in horror at the massive, gelatinous pile of assorted foods. "WE'VE GOT TROUBLE!" she shrieked and sprinted off.

"Wait, don't lure it-" Corrin warned, but the woman was already gone. "SHOOT!"

"SHLURRRRRMPPPPPP!" the beast cried (it would have you know that it was severely disappointed at its lack of mouth to make terrible, fear-inspiring noises. It was forced to settle for this suitably gross squelching noise instead). It rushed over the threshold into the party with astonishing speed.

"Well, she certainly hit the nail on the head..." Corrin muttered. "We've got trouble..."

AAAAAND Izana is a celebrity, Charlotte is as questionably proportioned as ever, Odin is... Odin, and Felicia says her line. It's what she's good at. All reviews are appreciated, and props to anyone who can guess what the emotion-sensitive slime was inspired by! Adieu!