Dave and Terezi broke up. Dave was dating Karkat now, and he seemed a lot happier. Jade was questioning her sexuality for a while, so she dated a troll girl named Feferi. Eventually, though, she discovered she was straight, and she and Feferi decided to just be friends. Now she was dating a troll named Tavros. Jane was dating Calliope, one of the only cherubs at the school. Rose and Kanaya were going strong still. Jake and Dirk were back together, and Roxy and Latula were dating now.

And somebody was leaving weird love notes in John's locker. They were always addressed as being from his secret admirer, and were honestly borderline stalkerish. He wondered who the hell was leaving said notes and, even more so how they knew where his locker was. They must've watched him in the mornings and between classes, which the boy found highly unnerving. Regardless, he simply tried to ignore them, considering the fact that nothing weird was happening to him besides that. He continued on like usual, simply brushing off the strangeness of the notes.

The time that passed was much more boring than usual. His friends didn't invite him over as much anymore, or, if they did, they were all with whoever they were dating. John was often left wondering when he would be in the same boat as them. Soon; he thought. Soon. And then he would think it was stupid that he ever even thought he would never get a girlfriend.

Vriska started sitting with John at lunch, much to Kanaya's dismay. Apparently, they used to be girlfriends or something, but broke it off for an undisclosed reason. That was what Rose said. Vriska was pretty nice, if not a bit strange and sometimes kind of snappy. She acted different around John than anyone else, but the boy remained oblivious about it.

"Hey, Vriska," John started, taking a bite of his sandwich, "someone's been leaving these really weird notes in my locker. Do you have any idea who it would be? They aren't written with any quirk, so I have no lead on anyone." Vriska glanced at him, smiling slightly. "Let me see one of the notes," the cobalt troll requested. John complied, handing her the latest note; the one he'd found in his locker today. "Wow. Someone must really like you! If anything, I'd take that as a compliment, John. Whoever it is obviously sees something in you," Vriska told him. "But no, sorry. I don't have the slightest idea of who the hell could be putting notes in your locker. Although it would have to be someone who knows where your locker is," the troll girl pointed out.

For the rest of lunch, John was pretty quiet. He tried to think of a way to catch whoever was putting the notes in his locker. Of course, his brainstorming session came up dry, so he was no closer to finding whoever the culprit was than he was a few weeks ago, when the letters started. Maybe he could ask Terezi. She would probably know. Regardless, ever since she'd broken up with Dave, she'd been sitting at a different table with her girlfriend. It was easy to find them, though, because her girlfriend's hair was really fluffy, and she had ram horns. He would talk to Terezi during biology and ask her if she could help him with the notes.

The bell rang, and John went to his biology class, anxiously awaiting for Terezi's appearance. As soon as she came in and sat down next to him, the boy turned to face her. "Hey Terezi! I have a really important question!" John nodded, reaching into his bookbag and pulling out the note. "Can you help me figure out who wrote this?" He asked. "Sure," Terezi smiled, taking the note. She licked it, then seemed to ponder for a bit. "It tastes like blueberry and gross white paper. I have no clue who wrote this, to be honest. The blue might mean a troll who's blue-blooded, buuuut that's not likely, considering the fact that they just wrote in blue pen," she exclaimed.

John sighed, taking the now-wet note back. "Thanks Terezi," he said, upset that he wasn't any closer.

That night, John decided to pester Jade. Maybe she could help with the note thing. And because he was feeling dumb about not having a crush. He didn't even know what having a crush felt like.

That should've been the first sign.

EB: hey jade.

GG: hey john! :D

EB: can i ask something?

GG: sure! what is it?

EB: someone has been leaving notes in my locker. it's weird, but regardless, i wanted to ask if you saw anybody around my locker, or if you might know who it is.

GG: whoa! :000 what kind of notes?

EB: love notes. apparently they're from a "secret admirer."

GG: awww!

GG: sorry john i really dont know... :(

GG: i havent seen anybody around your locker, and i have no idea of who it could possibly be.

EB: damn it!

GG: sorry john. i wish i could be more of a help :,(

EB: it's okay.

EB: jade?

GG: yeah?

EB: is it normal to not have a crush on anyone? even in high school?

GG: i dont know to be perfectly honest!

GG: we all grow romantically at our own rates

GG: maybe you just havent found anyone who you have a crush on! :)

EB: yeah...i guess you're right. thanks jade...

GG: you're welcome john! ^^

But yet, he still felt distant. It was like he was standing on one side of a glass wall or a window, and all his friends who knew about romance and dating were on the other side.

That should've been a sign.

However, he knew not the name for what he was feeling, or even that it was a thing that possibly existed. All he knew was that the feeling he felt was barely bearable, and he stopped for a moment to ponder.

He'd never had a crush.

What did that feel like?

Time to ask Rose. She was smart about that kind of thing.

EB: rose. i have something to ask.

TT: Yes?

EB: what does having a crush feel like?

TT: What?

EB: what does it feel like being in love?

TT: Haven't you had a crush before, John?

EB: i don't know.

TT: Well...it feels like butterflies in your stomach. But it also feels like wanting to be with the person you're crushing on forever, and wanting to spend time with them. You might feel shy or giddy as well. It feels kind of strange, but it's definitely something you'll know once you feel it. You might also feel sexual attraction to said person, which I don't have to explain.

EB: thanks. that was a helpful description.

TT: No problem.

He had never felt like that before. Not anything like what Rose had described. Still, he was only 17. Maybe other people were in the same boat? Maybe something was wrong with him, considering the fact that he found sex really gross, and found the admiration letters left in his locker more creepy than cute. Exploring this facet of himself felt uncomfortable, as it was something he had never addressed before. He was sure that it wasn't a mental illness related problem, as he'd never been mentally ill, nor had he struggled with such problems before.

Maybe he could talk to his dad about it?

No.

John trusted his dad, and the two had a good relationship. However, it might be weird, and his dad might not have a good answer, and everything might just turn out awkward. It was better to just try and figure it out slowly. All of this felt so overwhelming, and he'd started to wonder if he was just being stupid. Confusion wracked his brain, and he hoped that at least one of his friends might have an explanation as to why he felt this way.

To make matters worse, he hadn't even started on getting to the bottom of the thing with the letters.

Everything hurt.

The dark-haired boy got up from his desk, heading downstairs to get a glass of water and some aspirin. As he returned to his bed, John's eyes closed, and he quickly fell into a dreamless, black sleep.