Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

A/N: This chapter has been re-written so it's slightly different but true to the main concept and going over the feelings and ideas of these characters. Let me know what you think.

Chapter

Bella's eyes fluttered open on a Sunday in the afternoon. Coming into conciseness her brain began to run a million miles a minute as though a computer warming up before the big workday.

She recalled her confession, the guilt, her begging Jake to kill her but instead of death she received a humungous paw in the face…taking her into unconsciousness.

"Was I sleeping?" she whispered. She moved and felt a numbing ache in her shoulder that was bandaged up and slightly bloody. She groaned in pain and rubbed her aching limb. The soreness was so foreign and yet it made her feel alive. "What's happening to me?"

"That's what I would like to know," said a voice that came from across the room.

Her vision felt blurry and dull as though her HD quality vision had been replaced by analog TV.

She looked upon Jake's face he didn't look bloody or hurt but all the same she felt shame.

"I'm sorry," she began. "I shouldn't have-"

"Stop…" he interrupted her before he stood up. "I am tired of hearing that you're sorry. Now tell me, do you know what is happening to you?"

He had been waiting for her to wake-up barely afraid to leave her side wondering if she would ever wake-up.

"I don't really know what is happening to me," she confessed.

"Bella, when we were out on that field, I swore I saw real tears on your face and then your arm…it was bleeding and your barely healed. What vampire does that?"

She shrugged and flinched. Her shoulder still ached.

"I would offer you some meds but I've never needed any so there are none to offer," he said before changing the subject. " Look, you have been sleeping for 2-days now. I was starting to worry."

Instead of feeling overwhelmed by the fact that she had in fact slept she asked an unexpected question.

"Did I snore?"

He wanted to laugh.

"No, but you talked," he answered as he walked closer to her and sat down on his bed.

"What did I say?" she asked feeling embarrassed.

He smiled briefly.

"Just babble," he lied.

In all honesty, she had been talking for hours about how she missed him. How she had wished they had travelled together like he had offered. How much she…loved him and regretted breaking his heart. For a good 30 minutes all she said was sorry.

"I couldn't make it out really," he finished as he tucked her hair behind her ear. "But I'm glad your back."

Bella sighed. He was glad to have her back, a vast difference from before.

"Why do you think this is happening to you?" he asked, softly. His voice was even sweeter now and she relished it. "Any theories?"

Bella's eyes shifted as though she was contemplating her answer.

"When you were sick," she began. She almost chickened out for a moment but she knew she had to be honest. "I thought to myself how much I wished to be human." Your human, she added in her thoughts. Her attention turn to the window and to the barren back yard that really was just a vacant space before endless forest. "Are you…are you back to yourself?" she asked timidly.

"And stronger than ever," he finished. "I really don't know how it came about. I thought I was human. Then it came all back and now you…you are…"

"Turning human?"

He didn't answer, instead he touched her cheek it still felt cool but not ice cold as before.

She closed her eyes and felt his rough skin against her cheek. He was so hot again, it almost burned but she welcomed the feeling. It felt so good to be touched again; to be touched by him, she ached to feel more.

He pulled away and she felt like her senses were muddled but she tried to come up with why things were happening.

"I'm guessing the effects of turning people human don't last more than 48 hours," she concluded.

"Perhaps," he said with fear thinking that some things just don't last.

She took another breath.

"I guess it means that if I could have just controlled myself more, the Cullens would still be alive." She looked down, feeling shame course through her.

He on the other hand wanted to tell her it wasn't her fault. No one could have predicated the outcome of her turning. She needed to know that.

"If I could have just been stronger," she repeated before a tear ran down her face.

He shook his head.

"Bella, you didn't mean to. And how would any of you know that your gift would be to turn vampires...human or to have unimaginable blood lust. If they would have known they would have taken different measures."

"I stole their immortality," she interrupted. "I stole their lives. I had stolen the only way you knew how to exist from you. I am so sorry."

"What did I say about apologizing? You need to move on. Forgive yourself. And don't worry about me. Being a shape shifter was part of my genetic make-up. I doubt you could have stolen that from me. I was born this way, vampires are made."

She moved and ached and a piece of her was afraid. Being mortal meant she could actually die and suddenly life became more fragile and precious.

She tried to get up.

"I don't know what can happen next."

"Don't worry about it," he said. "Let's just take this one step at a time."

She bit her lip. He was going to be there for her.

"You don't want me to go?"

He didn't know how to answer that so instead he said, "Come on Bells, I'm not going to kick you out when you need me."

She wanted to ask if they were okay. If they were going to be okay around each other but she didn't have the guts.

She looked down, she felt like a coward and as most cowards do, she found something to distract her from her thoughts. At that moment she noticed that she was dirty. He had changed her clothes but she could still see the dirt on her.

How could he put me in his bed? I'm filthy, she thought.

"I need to shower," she said changing the conversation. "And after I am done, we need to change these sheets."

"Let me help you," he offered.

"That's okay," she insisted. "I can manage."

"Let me know if you change your mind," he said before she walked away from him and locked the door behind her.

I'm dreaming,she thought. This has to be a dream.

She moved forward to pull the curtain and hissed.

"Nope not dreaming, ouch, ouch," she hissed before she laughed, because it felt good to feel this type of pain.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Conversations with the Self

It was quite to Jake's advantage to have a good pair of ears. In some ways, his hearing served as a second pair of eyes; visualizing what was far-off in the distance or in this case, what was beyond closed doors.

At the moment, he could hear/see Bella showering. His ears could penetrate into the room vividly describing where every drop of water landed and glided down her skin. Providing an accurate description of the woman who was at this moment wet and dripping in his shower.

He couldn't lie to himself he hadn't been with a woman in the last decade. And the fact that it was her above all others in HIS bathroom covered in soapy suds was like living a fantasy.

He could imagine it perfectly, the steam in the room, the curtain slowing opening, her sudden gasp in surprise as his dark arms wrapped around her pale torso, the sweet quivering of her lips as his own lips glided up and down her neck.

He swallowed as he thought about his hands reaching up to glide upon her soap covered breasts and the muscles in his groined twitched at the idea of tweaking her nipples with his fingers.

But his fantasy had suddenly stopped when he heard Bella turn off the shower.

What the fuck are you doing? He screamed at himself, internally. How can you even entertain this idea?

He looked down at his pants and could see the strain of the material on his pulsating sex. He took deep breaths tried to calm himself down and proceeded to make the bed and walk out of the bedroom, because he knew if he even caught a glimpse of her bare skin he wouldn't be able to hide his reaction.

Out in the woods he stripped down and shifted into a wolf to do his version of walking-it-off by, running as fast as he could until he reached a cliff and jumped into the deep cold ocean. For a while, he let the current take him and found himself sink deep until his lungs burned and begged for air.

He finally pulled himself out into a secluded piece of beach and let himself rest on the rough sand, hoping to distract himself from his moment of weakness but it was useless because all his thoughts were on Bella.

After several minutes in the cold his mind began to race.

She was so close, I want to touch her, he thought. She's back. And it makes me want to try so bad. It should be simple.

But it wasn't simple.

She had chosen another over him, even going as far as marrying that person.

They had spent so many years separated from each other becoming different 'people.' He had been a protector, she had been a murderer and in all accounts he should have killed her or at least demanded for her to leave. That was the simple reality, yet he couldn't bring himself to think that he could ask her to leave or kill her. Especially now that she could become human.

She can't be by herself if she becomes human, he thought. It would be too much for her to be out in this changed world. Those woods would kill her in a day. I can't even imagine how she will react if she ever goes to a city. As soon as she'd step onto the grid of a big street the city will notice that she is unidentified. She doesn't even have a digital marker on her. She's basically undocumented.

He kind of laughed at that but tried to gear himself toward the possibility that if she were human he would have to get her papers and a new identity.

New Identity…new life, he thought with promise.

Then another truth sank into his thoughts, the idea that being human could be temporary.

What if she changes back? And what if the blood lust is worse? What if she kills someone from the tribe?he thought before running back into the woods.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Meanwhile, Bella was wondering of the whereabouts of Jake. Earlier, she had sworn she heard his heart rate pick-up, while she was showering. She even went as far as to turn off the shower to hear his breathing patterns but as soon as she did she heard a scurry of movement and a door opening and closing.

She figured he had stepped out to catch up on private affairs. After all, he probably had not left her side since the day on the field. Which left a big smile on her face.

He still cares,she thought dreamily before sighing. Maybe, things can get better after all.

She walked to the kitchen feeling a bit light headed and hungry.

Should I try to eat? No, I should hunt,she told herself before she heard a loud knock on the door.

"Jake?" she heard a young woman's voice. "Jake, it's Sarah. I brought you another basket of goodies. Jake are you there?" A few seconds past and Bella walked closer to the door just to take a peek but before she stepped any closer she stopped.

Maybe this is not a good idea,she thought. What if I can't control myself and I bite her. I'm hungry after all.

"Hey, I can hear you in there," Sarah said in a very unusually sweet voice. "Awe come on Jake, I even made Great-Grandma's Emily muffins, I know how much you love them. Awe Jake, please, please, please, let me in and I promise I'll behave." She finished the last sentence with a slight giggle.

Bella raised a brow.

Behave, huh? Well if you behave, I will, she thought before she opened the door.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0

Meanwhile, Jake stopped by Sam Uley's grandson's shed. It's where he always kept a spare of clothing in case he needed it. As he changed he heard a knock on the shed door.

"One second," Jake said before putting on his pants and opening the door.

"Hi Mr. Black," said a young boy.

"Oh hey, Josie," Jake answered rubbing the kids head. "What ya doing outside?"

The boy smiled.

"I saw a big wolf outside and thought I would investigate," he said.

Jake laughed. The kid already knew his secret before coming of age, it was his fault really he hadn't been careful, fortunately for him the kid was pretty quiet but it didn't mean he wasn't a smarty-pants.

"Is your dad home?" Jake asked.

"Sure is," Josie answered.

"What about your mom and sisters," he asked. "Are they here?"

"Nope," he said. "Just dad and I. Why do you want to talk to him?"

The truth was Jake wanted access to the archives of the tribe which contained several legends stemming back for generations.

While doing research on thee all-powerful overlord Manny Google, he had discovered a line regarding a cure for vampirism through the possession of a twin soul. In a way it had reminded him of a story his father had told him.

As a child his father Billy would tell him several stories. One was of a man who fell in love with a beautiful woman who died too young. However, the man was tenacious and he believed her to be his twin soul. So, after her death he took many pilgrimages until one day he came upon a mountain and become convinced that she was stuck inside the marble. The man with deep love carved into the mountain 'uncovering' his wife through the marble until he finally found her in the midst of the stone but Jake had forgotten what else came after that and wanted to see if by chance he could find the story in the tribe's archives which now belonged to the new Chief Dean Uley.

"Oh hello Jacob," Dean said. "Good to see you. What brings us this honor?"

Jake smiled Dean had always been very respectful of him.

"I needed to look at the archives," Jake said.

"Of course," he said. "I will grab the keys and we can go to the center. Oh by the way you haven't seen my daughter, Sarah have you?"

Jake furrowed his brow.

"No," he said. In fact, it had been a while since her last visit, considering that they had a bit of a misunderstanding.

"Well, she left just a few minutes ago, said she was taking you one of those goody baskets that you like so much."

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, his mind rambled.

"I have to go, I will have to see about those archives another time," he said.

"Is everything okay?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, yeah," he said. "I just feel bad that she went all that way to see me and I am not there. But no worries, I will send her right back to you."

And before Dean could say another word he ran into the woods in hope that Sarah was still alive.

A/N: Well let's hope Bella behaves.