I have to fake it
I'd leave if I could
I'm not in love
But the sex is good
You can't mistake it
Because it's understood
I'm not in love
But the sex is good
Pounding past the crisp sound system, the song beat a catchy pattern in the brain itself, although if it weren't for the randomness of the radio, neither Kick-Ass nor Red Mist would probably be listening to the tune right about now. No, if they were honest with themselves, they would probably be hearing something a lot darker, like steel twisting wood and bone as the engine revved through the skull of a certain female. Of course, being the sweet, naive dumb-ass that Dave was, he only envisioned some kind of hardcore soundtrack playing in the background of some gritty fight. Either way, had Red Mist not grown fed-up with the six-ring circus that called herself Emily, they probably wouldn't have been listening to any music at all - just that endless loop of bitching, fighting, whining, and racy-make-up cooing.
In fact, Red Mist had become so angered by something that she had said, Kick-Ass wasn't even sure if he had hung up the phone before throwing it over his shoulder, the slender rectangle bouncing off the back seat and landing with a rather loud thud on the floor. He was so steamed, even the color red wasn't on his radar. A bit ironic, given his color scheme.
"That fucking bitch thinks that she can keep me in the dark?! I don't care how good she got at blow jobs-" Dave looked out the window, awkwardly embarrassed by his virginity status, but Chris didn't seem to notice, "- she's not the only girl in the world with a mouth and the capacity to learn." Eyes gleaming beneath his mask, Chris looked over at Dave, "Fuck, even you could probably learn faster than she did."
The red on Dave's face spread, and he had the distinct impression (thank you side-view mirrors) that the shade intensified. He stuttered a bit, "Wh...what?"
Hook, line, and sinker. Kick-Ass might not have directly taken the bait, but judging from the fact that he didn't inflate that almost natural male response to vehemently shoot-down any such speculation of homosexuality, it was safe to say that he was as good as reeled in, guts drying on the counter as he was tossed onto the grill and sprinkled with lemon juice. Damn, Chris might have been spending just a little bit too much time with his dad lately...
Well, if someone *cough* *cough* Emily *exaggerated gaging* wasn't being so uptight about his plan, he might have been spending time with someone his own actual age. Seriously, the way that Chris saw it, she had no right to gripe about this, because she really did owe him...
But all the same, it was still too soon to dangle the primo vintage first edition (covered by a slip and untouched) before the nerd - not that Red Mist knew that Kick-Ass was the very same dork he saw almost every time he went into Atomic Comics. Looking over at the other boy, Chris played it off all nonchalantly. "What?"
Cocking his head to the side, Dave really wanted to ask something along the lines of 'did I just hear you right?' or even ' but I thought that you just...?', but he had no idea how to inquire without it coming out all wrong. So instead, he chose to play it safe and say nothing. Red Mist wasn't fooled by his deception however, because he was grooming to be the master deceiver...
"Well," Chris spoke up after several minutes of silence, "Tonight was a fuckin' waste of time. Sorry to waste you're time, Kick-Ass."
The green whatever shrugged, glad that the last topic had throughly been dropped, "No, I'd rather just kill a night doing jack shit than have to step in to some fucking gang-bangers brawling. It means that the city is somewhat safe for the night."
Chris nodded, mocking the emotion of understanding, "That's probably true."
Could there have been a more opportune moment? Sure, there probably could have been, but Chris was growing impatient...
"...I could always think of a few better ways to kill the time..." Leaning across the gap, Chris was inches away from Dave, his hand one good slip away from a real conversation starter. Reaching for the glove compartment, he pulled out a silver flask, also emblazoned with the Mist logo.
Before he had went for the compartment, Dave could feel the other boy, his leather-clad skin mere inches away from his own scuba suit, the warmth of his proximity rising a light, flapping sensation deep within his core. It was the same kind of feeling he had when he was close to a pretty girl, like Katie Deauxma. But Red Mist had moved away almost as quickly as he had come, shifting back casually in the driver's seat as he opened the flask and took a drink, downing the clear liquid.
Peeking over at his companion as he chugged on the throat-burning liquor, Red Mist suddenly removed the container from his lips, handing it over to Dave, "Want some?"
Maybe it was the feeling lingering in his stomach, the heat glowing radiantly, refusing to leave, but Dave couldn't shake the feeling that there was something else in Red Mist's words... No, he shook his head, he was being stupid... Wasn't he...?
As much as he wanted to decline, just like he had with the pot, Dave was experiencing feelings that he never expected to have, not towards another guy at any rate, and to be quite frank, it was scaring the shit out of him, so against his own better judgment, he took the flask. Looking at it uncertainly, he had no idea if it was a better thing to drink or not, since there was the chance that he could get snockered, allowing this whole night to spin horribly out of control, but if he didn't drink any, his nervous would probably do a good enough job of ruining the night for him anyways. Fuck, either way he turned, Dave was boned...
"I guess one drink wouldn't hurt..." Skepticism was oozing out of every breath he took, but Dave supposed that just one small sip would be the best alternative, since he had already grabbed the flask.
Smirking, Chris watched as the other boy put his lips to the flask, the bulge in his pants taking a slight ding when Kick-Ass took a pissy little sip. His disappointment was further tinged with anger when he spewed it all back out, shocked with the burn of the vodka. Son of a bitch, that was a total waste of a combination of cocaine (Chris thanked his father for having a nearly infinite stash around the apartment), weed, and Vodka! So much for drugging the other boy and just taking what he wanted from him...
But maybe it wasn't the end of the world...
With nowhere to spit but out, a large portion of the tainted beverage (Chris more than accustomed to such things) had landed on his crotch, leaving a rather dark spot on the fabric. Ok, well given the fact that he was in a wet suit, it wasn't that dark, but Dave knew that it was there, and so did Red Mist, so that was bad enough... Jesus H. Christ, even as a superhero, Dave just couldn't be cool, could he?
But he wasn't the only socially inept psycho in spandex, now was he?
Reaching over the space once more, Chris began to stroke between the other boy's legs. Dave's first reaction was to throw him off, to question what the fuck he thought he was doing, but as much as he hated to admit it, it kinda felt good to have a hand that wasn't his own touching his cock. He had never thought about it before, but maybe it wasn't so bad to have another guy running his hands over his dick, because being a guy, he knew exactly what felt good, and because he knew that, Dave didn't have to say one word to correct him, or even to plead for more. Maybe that was the appeal of two girls fucking each other, from their perspective...
"Hmmm..." He didn't mean to, but Dave let out a low moan, his head rolling back against the seat.
Flicking his wrist, Chris unlocked the backseat, nodding his head over towards the back. Biting his lower lip, looking so crazy sexy as he did so, Dave still wasn't entirely sure about this, but by this point, there would be no dissuading Red Mist, not that Kick-Ass could possibly know that...
Just to make his point, Red Mist gave his junk a hefty squeeze; it was the kind of squeeze that said 'I'mma fuck your brains out, and you're gonna love it, bitch'. "You save the world, but who's going to save you?" That could have come out so many different ways, but the way that Chris kind of whispered it on the air, it sounded like a purr, like silk. It was the kind of line that would have made any average teenage (or adult) fangirl (or boy) cream in her panties.
Partially running, Kick-Ass slid out of the passenger seat and crawled into the back of the car, meeting Red Mist as he crawled in from the other side. Face-to-face for one of the first times that night, the two boys took one fleeting second to really look at each other, but Kick-Ass turned away more quickly than Red Mist, bashful of this entire affair. Chris, in all his evil, really savored this, hoping that this would be one memory the pot (and whatever else) didn't steal from him.
Dave and Chris, Chris and Dave, Kick-Ass and Red Mist - however you wanted to address them - the donged (or bonged, depending on how much you wanted to blame the marijuana (second-hand in Dave's case) for this) duo both closed the doors behind them, somewhat weary of any kind of witness. Whatever this little thing was, they mutually agreed with a silent nod, it did not make either of them gay. A little bi-curious perhaps, but certainly not gay... Maybe it would have been a good idea to bring a chick into this, just to gloss over any kinks, but Chris was far too possessive of Emily to share her with anyone else, and if Emily had found out that he had so much as looked at another woman, he could only guess as to how bad her reaction would be. So, it was just the pair of them... Although somehow, neither minded all that much...
Now that there was nothing to block the path to the other, there was no other excuse for ineptitude besides inexperience and naivety, which Dave Lizewski was bursting with, but thankfully for him, that was one of the largest reasons that Red Mist wanted him so badly. Since the very moment that he had had the thought of taking from Kick-Ass something that would only be missed once the truth came out, Chris knew that he would have to be the one to take charge, which was exactly what he was doing now. Thrusting himself against the length of the backseat, Red Mist had Kick-Ass pinned halfway between the seat and door.
Throwing his hand over the squirming shoulder of his unknowing victim, Chris slammed down the lock, whispering in Dave's ear, "To prevent any accidents..."
Raw, raging, and coursing unbearably throughout their veins, the anticipation was pure agony, but the very best kind of it. Gazing down at Kick-Ass with lust-filled eyes, Red Mist then realized that the scuba suit was not made for such things as quickies in the back seat (his custom-tailored costume was). That made this all the better for him...
"Turn around."
At first it seemed like a rather blunt request, but then the young hero realized that he was in his costume, so it suddenly made all kinds of sense. But it wasn't an easy task to accomplish, rotating in a cramped space with another person sitting on top of you, their junk grinding into yours as you pivoted your hips and flopped over so that your face was buried in the leather while your back was exposed to the world. It was a good thing that Kick-Ass shared a certain level of trust with Red Mist, that he could count him as something like a friend, because doing something like this with a stranger or someone that hated you was a very good way to end up stabbed in the back and left for dead. But with Red Mist, Dave didn't have to worry so much, despite not even knowing what his name was.
Unzipping his wetsuit, Chris left the mask on. Sure, that probably would have helped the scheme he was cooking up with his old man, or better yet his own sick, sadistic drive for making this boy squirm, but to unmask him now would take some of the fun out of it. So the mask was untouched.
"You have a sexy body..." It might only have been his back that Red Mist was looking at, but the curves of muscle and bone beneath his pale flesh was more than enough to get Chris excited. "I can't wait to cum all over your back..." Crap, he might have just said too much... To cover his tracks, Red Mist pressed his lips lightly to Dave's shoulder, nipping lightly.
Once more, Dave let out an involuntary moan. "Mmm-Mist...?"
"Hmm?" Rolling like an ocean wave over that back that would only grow stronger and more chiseled with time (and more scarred), Red Mist reached knowingly inside of Kick-Ass' uniform, beneath the band of his boxer-briefs, hand wrapping around his cock as if it were an extension of his own body. "Is this what you wanted?"
As he began to stroke the other hero off, Red Mist could only assume that his quivering nods were the boy's reply. Quickening his hidden gestures, Chris began to pump his still-contained emperor against Dave's rather nicely shaped ass, earning a soft groan from his own mouth after only a few passes. Using his free hand - as if there was such a thing in sex - Red Mist slipped one gloved finger inside his mouth, one at a time until three digits were gleaming more than the rest. Starting with the smallest - as much as he wanted Kick-Ass to suffer, he didn't relish the thought of explaining any unnecessary messes - the young, evil Bruce Wayne eased into the tight entrance.
Completely foreign, it took a moment for Dave to register what had just happened, the shock speeding alongside the pain like a speeding bullet to the brain. "Oww, FUCK!"
What a pussy... Chris had put his girlfriend through so much worse, and she didn't cry like some sniveling little bitch at the first signs of pain, but then again, he was fairly certain that she wasn't completely sane... But he wouldn't change his broken angel for the world. Not even for the chance to do to this fucker what he really wanted to... Although, it was a fairly close call at this point in time...
"We're not even at the fun stuff yet..." Chris couldn't hide the grin spreading from ear to ear, so he was rather glad that he didn't have to. Ready or not, he slipped the second finger inside, thinking to himself that the prick should be grateful he was being so generous as to prepare him for the main course.
Grunting as the second extremity joined the first, both wriggling in the opposite direction, Dave was less sure than ever about this, the searing pain in his ass making him think that he would never be able to sit down properly again, but he knew that changing his mind now was out of the question... Besides, after he got somewhat used to it, the pain wasn't quite that bad... Not entirely...
But nothing could have prepared him for what came next...
Skipping the third finger as spite got the better of him, Red Mist decided that if asked about it, he would just come in with the 'I've never done this before' defense, but that wouldn't only be if dipshit was of the mind to bring it up. He wasn't. Unzipping his trousers after what felt like an eternity of torture, Chris stroked himself once or twice before shoving his dick inside a hole that was, to be honest, not quite ready for it, and just like the first time, he felt no remorse for that fact. Slowly, Red Mist began to pump himself back and forth, allowing Kick-Ass the courtesy of familiarizing himself with the pace and pattern before alternating any of his rhythmic movements. It was more than he afforded Emily their first time. A lot more.
It didn't take too long for Dave to realize that while he didn't hate this, being shoved face-down into cold leather while a guy in slightly less frigid leather pinned him down and had his way with his ass, this wouldn't be something he actively sought out...
Nothing more than a quickie, it wasn't long before part of the aggravation building up inside of Chris was released - this time literally - on someone else. Pulling out just before he could cum, Red Mist did exactly as he promised he would do and let it all out, spilling his seed on Kick-Ass' back. The final splurts, he wiped off on the hero's spine, rubbing the tip of his cock across the skin. As for Dave, he came inside of his suit, all over the hand that was still whacking him off. Before extracting his hand, Chris wiped his gloved hand off on Dave's stomach, smearing Dave's own semen on the flesh. For what it was worth, the sex wasn't so bad...
It wasn't exactly private either...
The phone, so carelessly tossed aside, had allowed Emily to hear everything... Every moan... Every moment... Every thrust... Everything...
I'm not saying that either guy is gay (not that there's anything wrong with liking whoever the hell you want to ^^), but when I was looking through DeviantART, I saw a butt-ton of slash stuff, so I figured that it was fairly popular pairing (but looking through the selection of fics on this site, I'm not entirely sure about that conclusion). So, I wanted to appease the fans. I guess that fell out the window, but at least now this gives me a chance to work on something I never do, so that's good. ^^ And yay, more evil Chris! I love evil Chris ^3^ ! And another find for me! Ok, so I'm watching Kick-Ass for the seven millionth time (and I've only owned it for a week by this point), and just like last time, by pure chance, I spotted yet another Chris D'Amico cameo! Again, Chris and Stu are in Atomic Comics, but this time they're seated at the booth behind/beside Dave and Katie (when she buys him the coffee and he convinces her to e-mail Kick-Ass). Oh, randomness! Seriously though, I've been watching that movie way too much. Oh, and if you are wondering, in the movie 'Get Him to the Greek', Russell Brand refers to his own *cough* thing *cough* as 'the emperor'. I know, what a strange place for my more modest side to come out, especially after this chapter. Oh well, such is life.
Remember, reviews are always welcome, no matter how nit-picky or simple! So review! Pretty please?
"The Sex Is Good", by Saving Abel.
Kick-Ass is the property of Mark Millar and John Romita Jr. Emily Vela is mine. Knight too.