Beca heard him tell her she won't get rid of him easily. She heard the front door slam a few moments later and let the tears, that she'd been blinking back, fall. She walked to her bed, curled up and gave herself permission to cry over him.

She did it. She broke up with him. It was the right thing to do. They wouldn't have worked anyway. She gave it a lot of thought. It had been all she thought about the entire day. Why wait until she would be going back to L.A. when she could just put an end to it earlier and save the two of them a lot of time?

She sniffed wiping her cheek then sat up and forced herself to stop crying after a good hour of sobbing. She convinced herself that puffy eyes wouldn't make the hole she was feeling in her heart disappear to get herself to stop crying. She got out of bed and made her way out of her bedroom. Walking to the kitchenette she realized that she hadn't eaten the entire day and decided to grab a bite despite not having the appetite to eat.

Beca frowned when she reached the kitchenette and found grocery unpacked neatly on the counter and her IPad there as well when she clearly remembered leaving it on coffee table the night before. She reached for the IPad and unlocked it. Finding a Falafel recipe, her favorite food, bookmarked on the internet browser made her feel a rush of tears building up in her eyes and heaviness in her chest. She put the IPad down and rested her hands on the counter. "C'mon," she sniffed, stumping her foot. No breaking down— she closed her eyes feeling the tears.

Blowing a breath, she straightened up, walked to the fridge and pulled ice-cream from the freezer then made her way to the couch and hopped on it, deciding to eat her feelings. She reached for her bag and pulled her cell-phone, ordering pizza.

A couple of days later.

Jesse was sitting on his sofa, biting his nails as he eyed his phone, debating whether or not to call Beca. He had been sitting there for quite some time, trying to figure out how he was going to get Beca to see that what she did was a mistake. He loved her and as long as there was a chance for them to be together was going to fight for her. Her leaving for L.A. in a year would give him enough time to work on convincing of staying in New York with him where she clearly belonged, in his opinion. He wasn't being selfish. They both deserved to be together. But, the fact that he couldn't get a hold of her for two days wasn't helping.

It was the fourth of July and Jesse Swanson had no plans for the day. The few friends he had in New York have invited him to hang out but in his current mood he didn't want to take his very grumpy ass anywhere where people would be happy and positive because he wasn't and he didn't want to be the sad guy in the party, thank you very much. He was fine staying in and being sad all alone.

He teared his eyes from his phone when Bender jumped on the sofa. His dog was desperate for attention and Jesse felt bad for not giving his dog the attention he was seeking and decided to take him out for a walk.

Jesse aimlessly walked Bender around for nearly an hour, making a stop to get a bottle of water for himself when he started to feel thirsty. It was starting to get dark when he returned to his apartment.

He fed Bender then watched him run to his bedroom and guessed he was going to curl up and sleep at the foot of the bed. Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket he pull it and smiled seeing that it was Sandra calling on FaceTime. Tapping to answer the call, he tried to look cheerful when he saw his daughter grin at him.

"Hi, baby. You having fun over there?" She nodded furiously at his question. "That's great," he grinned at her, hoping that his grin looked real.

She should have stayed at home. Yep, her quiet apartment is way better than the beach house she was at. Despite knowing some of the people at the party thrown by Matt, Beca, all alone, was leaning against a column in the porch, sipping a beer. She was definitely that one guest at every party that looked like they were attending a funeral.

She only decided to go because she needed to get out of the house for another reason than work.

Beca shook the beer then looked at it, realizing it was empty. She straightened up and turned on her heels, making her way to the refreshment table. She forced a smile when Matt jumped in front of her. "You look like you're enjoying yourself," he poked her shoulder with the beer he was holding. "What, you west coast people have a different concept of partying?"

"Matt, you know I'm from Pittsburgh so you should stop this west coast/east coast comparison thing," she turned to the table and picked a coke then looked up, "Do you happen to have any lime in here?"

"There's lime in the kitchen. Follow me," he gestured for her to follow him. Beca picked the bottle of Rum she'd seen on a shelf, a solo cup along with the coke can and followed Matt to the kitchen.

"What's that, rum?" Matt asked pulling a lime for Beca along with a knife.

"Mhmm," she placed the can, rum bottle and the red solo cup on the kitchen island.

"You gonna make rum and coke?"

"Yeah," she accepted the lime and knife from him.

"Wait, I think there's an ice cube tray in here," he opened the freezer. "Yep," he pulled the tray. He dropped some cubes into the cup then chuckled watching Beca carefully cut the lime.

"I'm not good with knifes, shut up," she said feeling his gaze.

"Didn't say anything," he shrugged then walked out of the kitchen, coming back less than a minute later, holding an empty solo cup.

"When did you learn to make rum and coke?" he asked, watching her pour rum into the cup.

"You just mix rum and coke then squeeze lime or lemon or whatever you want into it. It's no rocket science, dude," she shrugged.

"Yeah, but, like, there's a right amount of rum to mix with coke," he took her cup and sipped from it when she squeezed lime into it.

"This is really good," he nodded. "Why are you looking at me like that?" he gestured at her face.

"You just took my cup," she maintained the scowl.

"I got you another one," he shook the empty cup.

She snatched the cup from him and proceeded to make a second one.

"You didn't answer me. When did you learn?" he took another sip.

"A while back," she answered.

"Your boyfriend taught you?" he asked, remembering that Jesse worked as a bartender, and watched her as she momentarily stopped what she was doing then nodded resuming it.

"I really thought you'd bring him tonight," he shook his drink. "Everything alright there?" he frowned hearing Beca let out a heavy sigh.

"Yeah," she looked up and handed him the knife then took her drink in her hand.

"You're awfully distant. You sure you're alright?" he asked throwing the knife in the sink.

"I'm fine," she gave him a small smile. "I should take this back where I found it," she grabbed the rum.

"It's dad's," he told her. "Careful with it," he said watching her walk away.

Beca gulped down some rum and coke after she placed the rum bottle where she found it and walked out of the house, deciding to go for a walk on the beach.

"Jesus Christ," she murmured, hearing Matt call her name. She turned around and waited for him to catch up.

"You went to Barden university, right?" he asked.

"Yeah, why?" she questioned.

"A friend of mine is bringing his friend and she went there. I thought you might be interest in knowing," he shrugged. "You should stick around until she gets here," he added, casually.

"Oh, I'm just gonna go for a walk. I'm not leaving," she told him.

"You're not?"

"There's free booze and people aren't annoyingly forcing me into conversations. Your party rules, man," she bent down and untied her laces before she kicked off her combat boots.

"Would you mind if I joined you?" he asked as he took off his flip flops. "I promise I'll stay quiet."

"I don't mind," she shrugged, turning on her heels.

Matt stayed true to his word and kept his mouth shut as they walked.

They got back to the house at dusk as it started to get dark.

"That's the guy whose friend went to Barden," he nodded at a guy.

Beca looked where Matt nodded, "Holy shit," she said in surprise.

"I'm assuming you know her?"

"Yeah."

"That's great—I'll see around, I need to use the bathroom."

Beca nodded then started to make her way to where they were standing on the porch. She cleared her throat to get their attention.

"Oh my god, Beca!"

"Stacie," Beca smiled, eyeing one of her closest college friends.

"What are you doing here?"

"I actually work with the host of this party. I live in New York—okay," Beca chuckled when Stacie pulled her into a hug and hugged her back.

"I know. I had to hear from Chloe that you moved here—Kevin, this is Beca Mitchell, we went to college together. We were in an A cappella group."

"Hi, nice meeting you Kevin," Beca held the empty solo cup with the same hand she was holding her boots with and shook his head.

"You, too. You did A cappella?" he turned to Stacie.

"We were huge," Stacie said proudly.

"Yep," Beca nodded along.

"Barden—Barden Bellas?" Kevin said thoughtfully. "I think I remember your group. Yeah, you preform for the president and one of you showed her vag—"

"—Yep that's us," Beca said to him then turned to Stacie. "What are you doing in New York?"

"I'm here for work."

"Cool."

"Were you down by the beach?" Stacie asked.

"Yeah, I went for a walk," Beca eyed the sand on her feet for a moment. "I should go wash this off."

"You should," Stacie agreed.

"I'll be back," Beca said then started to make her way inside the house. She walked up the stairs, hoping to find a bathroom and ran into Matt.

"Hey," he greeted.

"Sorry for this," she gestured at her feet.

"Yeah, don't worry about it," he waved it off. "The cleaning people will clean the house tomorrow."

"Where's the bathroom?"

"Follow me," he turned on his heels. Beca rolled her eyes because he could have told her instead of guiding her to the bathroom.

"Looks like it's a Barden reunion down there," he said, unlocking the door that led to the bathroom.

"Yeah," she nodded. "I haven't seen Stacie since new year's eve," she told him as she put her combat boots down.

"Oh you haven't met the other Barden graduate?"

"There's another guest that went to Barden?" she stepped inside the bathtub, glancing at him.

"Yeah, I thought you've seen him. Um, he was looking at you and your friend talking. I asked if he knew you he said you went to college together."

"What's his name?" she asked, grabbing the hand-held shower head.

"I didn't ask."

"You don't know your guests names?"

"He's probably here with someone," he shrugged grabbing a towel for her to use and handed it to her when she put the the shower head back where it was. "Thanks," she accepted the towel.

"Barden is a pretty popular college, huh?"

"No, it's just cheap," she stepped out of the tub and proceeded to wear her socks and boots and straightened up after rolling down her jeans.

Reaching the stairs, Matt stopped walking. "That's him," he pointed at a man who was by the refreshment table. Hearing Beca humorlessly and audibly laugh, he looked at her.

"You know him?"

"Yeah, I do," she sighed. "I should go say hi," she said as she started to walk down the stairs.

"Okay," Matt shrugged.

Beca made her way to the refreshment table then said, "hi," to get his attention.

Hearing her voice, he looked up. "Beca Mitchell," he smiled, eyeing her.

"Nick Stuckmann," she clicked her tongue. "How have you been, man?" she asked, not missing the way he quickly checked her out. She glanced at his left hand and saw the mark that a wedding band would leave when you take it off after a long time.

"I've been alright," he shrugged. "You?"

"Amazing."

"I can see that," he chuckled noting her sarcasm.

"How do you know Matt the host?" she asked despite knowing that he and Matt didn't know each other.

"I don't know him but he throws great parties."

"So, you're crushing the party," she concluded.

"Yeah. No one seems to mind," he shrugged. "How long has it been? 5 years?"

"Around that, yeah!" she nodded.

"You aged well," he said sounding impressed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she arched an eyebrow.

"It means you look as beautiful as I remember."

"Thank you," she smiled tightly at him. "How's work?" she asked to change the subject. He's a flirt. The last thing she needed was a flirt. The hole in her heart was too fresh it would take her at least 3 months before she could even consider having a casual fling.

"Work is fine, I work for the government. It's really fun," his words were dripping with sarcasm.

"I bet it is. Accounting sounds like loads of fun."

"Well, right now it's not as much accounting as it is doing budget cuts. What about you? Living the dream?"

"Oh yeah, my life is so amazing right now."

"You're being sarcastic."

"No, it is. I mean, career wise, things are going great."

"I'm sensing a but."

"No but," she shook her head.

Jesse groaned, throwing his head back as he laid on the sofa. He had just finished talking with his daughter. She was having fun in L.A.. He missed her. It felt weird not to have her over but was glad she wasn't with him because he wouldn't want her to be around him when he's really miserable.

He tossed his phone on the coffee table rubbed his eyes. The really heavy feeling in his chest was unbearable. If he were to describe it he'd say it's like having someone agonizingly slowly and continuously stab him right in the heart.

He truly felt like shit. And, knowing nothing could fix him apart from having Beca back made him feel worse.

Sighing, Jesse got up, deciding to go shower then maybe sleep.

Nick kept flirting and Beca was getting tired of being polite. She was one step away from exploding in his face.

"Okay, I don't mean to be rude but I think I'm gonna go hang with Stacie now," Beca said, deciding that leaving was the best option.

"I'll see around there. You think we can hang some time soon?"

"Um, maybe," she replied vaguely.

"So, no then," he chuckled. "Beca, I think I know you well enough to see that you're really bored of my company."

"Bored wouldn't be the right way to put it, to be honest."

"Okay, not bored. Annoyed?"

"When did you get divorced?" she asked, nodding at his ring finger.

"We filed for divorce a couple of months ago," he rubbed his ring finger.

"Sorry to hear that," she said apologetically.

"It's okay," he shrugged. "You hate math, how are you handling taxes?" he asked when he saw that Beca was looking around for Stacie.

"Mom does them for me," she told him and rolled her eyes when he laughed.

"I know that I should try to understand how they work, and I will. I just haven't gotten around," she looked back at him.

"Well, I can help you with them. Not like do them for you but help you figure them out so that you wouldn't have your mom do them for you," he had a hopeful look in his eyes.

"Thanks for the offer," she finally said and watched him reach inside his pocket and pull his wallet.

"Here's my card. Call me when you want to learn how to do taxes."

"Thank you," she accepted the card.

"It's great to see you again, Beca," he smiled at her.

"You too," she said then turned on her heels looking around for Stacie.

"Is that—"

"Yes, it's him," Beca nodded cutting Stacie off. "Is he looking over here? I can feel a gaze on me. Is it him?"

"Yeah," Stacie told her. "He's checking you out and he's very obvious about it— anyway, you look like shit, what's going on?" Stacie looked back at Beca.

"I broke up with Jesse," Beca informed her, taking her drink from her.

"Who?" Stacie questioned in puzzlement.

"My roommate. Remember him?" Beca gave her back her drink.

"The flirty dude from Chloe's party, right?" Stacie asked.

"Yeah, him," Beca ran her fingers through her hair then gave Stacie a short version of what had been happened in her love life.

"You need more booze," Stacie said letting Beca take another sip from her drink.

"I can't get drunk," Beca sniffed, pushing back the tears that talking about Jesse brought. "I have work tomorrow, it wouldn't be professional for be to show up hungover."

"Fuck that," Stacie scoffed. "You're hurting and booze fixes things— temporarily— you need to feel better," Stacie squeezed her shoulder. "C'mon, let's get you drunk."

"I have a bad feeling about this," Beca cleared her throat.

"Don't," Stacie said. "I won't let you hook up with Nick," she added, catching Beca glance at him.

"That's comforting." Beca sucked in a deep breath then said, "let's do this." She was damn sure it won't end well because who was she kidding, it's Stacie who's helping her deal with her break up. STACIE CONRAD. Her highly sexually driven friend was helping her mend her broken heart.

"Ohh, let's play beer pong," Stacie said then looked at Beca who just nodded her head.

They lost at beer pong. Beca was good at it but Stacie was purposely losing so that Beca would get drunk.

Next up they played flip the cup. Beca took it personally and won.

She then grabbed a bottle of wine told Stacie to follow her and got on the roof of the house. Stacie was sober so she made sure Beca didn't die as she tried to climb the roof.

"What are we doing here, Beca?" Stacie asked, taking a seat next to her friend.

"Fireworks should start soon," she hiccuped focusing her vision as she checked the time. "We can watch them from here," she brought the bottle to her mouth, taking a sip.

"How are you feeling, captain?" Stacie asked.

"No one has called me that in like 6 years now," Beca chucked. "It feels numb here," she tapped her chest, aiming for her heart.

"Alcohol does that," Stacie nodded.

"It's only been two days and I really miss him," Beca said after a short period of silence. "This really sucks," she wiped her nose with the back of her hand.

"I'm sure it does," Stacie took the bottle from her. "Hey, you think in you're in a low enough place to consider taking part of an orgy?"

"No," Beca chuckled.

"I wasn't kidding. It's fine, though, you've always been a prude anyway," she shrugged.

"I am not a prude," Beca defensively said. She soon got distracted by fireworks when they started.

Jesse was walking out of the shower when he heard fireworks. He walked to the closest window and looked out of it but thanks to all the building that blocked the view he couldn't see any. He sighed and made his way to his closet, glancing at Bender who woke up and started barking, startled by the noise fireworks made.

He put on a pair of boxers and sweatpants then walked to his dog and tried to calm him down. Jesse sat down on the floor and just hugged his dog when he finally calmed down.

"Oh, Bender," he sighed pulling away. "You think if I dropped by her apartment, she'd let me in?" he asked then nodded when Bender barked.

"You're right, I should give her more time," Jesse scratched the top of Bender's muzzle. "I'll tell her why we can't just break up and she'll see that I'm right," Jesse said then chuckled when Bender rolled over and looked at him with an expectant grin. He started to rub his belly and heard him purr.

"I seriously don't think I can let go of Bec," he told his dog. "She has a point, though, our work hours are different... I'll see if I can get a different shift or get a different job," he shrugged. "I mean this job pays well enough to cover the expenses of Sandra tests and get stuff for the baby," he ran his free hand through his hair. "There are always composing gigs. I should actively look for gigs," he nodded then chuckled to himself, realizing he was talking to himself.

"Where to?" Stacie asked, watching Beca get on her feet.

"Home," Beca answered.

"You're okay going by yourself? I can get Kevin to give you a ride."

"I'll get an Uber," Beca shook her phone. "I just need to figure out a way to get down there first," she chuckled looking around.

Stacie helped her down and stuck by herself until her Uber arrived.

"We'll hang out later this week, 'kay?" Beca slurred.

"Yeah, totes," Stacie nodded.

On the drive home, Beca rested her head against the window glass, wiping the tears that started to fall. The numbness she was feeling wasn't enough to make her feel better. Well, Stacie tried to help it just didn't work.

Beca played with her keys between her fingers then held the key to Jesse's apartment between her finger. Through her blurry vision, she eyed it then decided then and there that she should go give it back to him. She looked up at the driver and gave him Jesse's adresse.

Hearing a series of knocks on the door woke Jesse up. He got up and started to make his way to the front door. Jesse rubbed his eyes and unlocked the door. "Beca, what are you doing here?" he asked in surprise.

She stared at hs bare chest for half a second then blinked.

"How did you get in here?"

"Your doorman let me," she slurred. "I came to give this back," she held his key up. "I'll have the few t-shirts you left at my place sent to you, soon," she sniffed. "Also, can I use the bathroom?"

"I haven't seen you this drunk since new year's eve," he said, stepping back. "C'mon in, Beca," he nodded for her to get in. She handed him his key back then walked past him, making her way to his bedroom.

"Bec, you hungry?" he asked when she walked out of his bedroom. "I have mac and cheese," he told her when she stopped walking.

"Yeah," she shrugged and walked with him to the kitchenette.

He heated a plate then placed it in front of her then made sure she drank enough water and coffee to sober up a little.

"Sorry for waking you up," she apologized hearing him yawn as he washed the plate she ate in.

"It's fine," he stretched after drying his hands.

"So, wanna talk about why you're really here?" he asked, taking a seat next to her.

"I came to give your key back."

"You could have waited until tomorrow to do that. Why now?" he questioned. She shrugged in response.

"Beca, c'mon. Talk to me." Not hearing anything back, he sighed. "Fine. I'll talk. I miss you, a lot. You can't just decided to break up out of no where."

"I can and I did," she said in a breaking voice. "You don't think I hate this? It hurts too fucking much," she wiped her cheeks. "But, that's how it is. We can't get it all—I'm going to go back to L.A. you think you can change that but it's not gonna happen. You know why?" she paused to sniff. "Because even if I somehow decide to stay in New York I'm going to dump you. It's what I do," she shrugged.

"Beca you're not making much sense— Look, if we're not meant to be then be it. But, it's not fair to end what we have without a good reason."

"You still don't understand," she shook her head and got up. "If you really care about me you gotta leave me alone."

"I can't," he shrugged. "I love you, Beca," he reached for her hand, frowning when she started to openly cry.

"You're not going out," he shook his head when she pulled her hand from his hold and enveloped her in his arms. "Don't go," he placed a kiss on her temple, feeling the tears he'd been blinking back start to fall.

"I'll make more time for us. We'll hang out more. I promise that we will," he buried his face in her hair. "Don't go."

"It's not about that," she said into his chest. "I'll hurt you eventually, Jesse," she looked up. "I'll hurt you and end up with a broken heart as well. This is better, believe me, it is."

"How can you say that?" he cupped her face and rested his forehead against hers. "How is this better? How is this better than being together until there's a valid reason to break up?" he closed his eyes, not bearing to look when she removes herself and leaves. He felt her breath then her soft lips against his. He kissed her back, hesitantly, not knowing what she wanted until she ran her hands up his torso then pressed herself against him.

Pulling her close to him, he hoped it wasn't break up sex that she wanted. He just did everything she wanted him to do to her and hoped for the best.

AN: So, I've been diagnosed with a mild case of Dyslexia very recently. Yep, at 19. It's weird that it took me this long to figure it out considering the really weird learning problems that I have. Anyway, now that I know that they're not weird and have a reasonable explanation behind them, it being just a disorder that I've been coping with for 19 years without even knowing, I feel better about myself. It's sort of a relief. And, this relief has been powering up my creative juices thus this fast update.

It'd be cool to hear thoughts. Thank you all reading.