AN: I think the content is mature enough for the chapter to be considered an M rated chapter. So, yeah, this chapter is M rated.
Please note that this is the second time I ever attempted to write mature shit but this time is lengthier but also necessary. I wouldn't have written sex stuff if they weren't important plot-wise. Don't be dicks about how I'm not good at it, that would be super dope of you.
Enjoy and leave your thoughts.
Jesse woke up with a throbbing headache and to the sound of his phone ringing. He rubbed his eyes before he looked at his phone to see who was calling then answered seeing that it was his ex-wife.
"Hey," he spoke in a raspy voice, placing a hand over his eyes. He wasn't sure if the headache was because he's hungover or because of the stitches in his head.
"Did you just wake up?" she asked.
"Yeah—shit, I'm sorry," he sat up, "I'll be there in 20—30 minutes."
Jesse couldn't believe he forgot that he was taking his daughter to the zoo, something he was looking forward to the whole week.
"Please don't take more than half an hour."
"Yeah, yeah, I know you have plans," he got up and stumped his toe on the edge of the coffee table and bit his tongue to keep himself from cursing out loud.
He spent the night working on a new piece (and drinking). Fighting with Beca had one upper: getting inspired. Composing helped him cope with how he was feeling.
"See you in half an hour, Jesse."
"Yep," he hung up the phone and threw it on the sofa.
Jesse made his way to the bathroom, dropping his t-shirt in the hamper on his way. He stood in front of the mirror, giving it his back to get a better look at the blood Beca talked about and saw that she was right. He quickly showered and brushed his teeth, ignoring his headache, then headed out after wearing a cap, to hide the stitches from Sandra, and sunglasses because he was really hungover.
Jesse ran the distance between the subway station and Sandra's apartment because he was already late and she had somewhere to be. "Man, do I need to work out," he coughed, resting his hands on his knees when he reached her apartment complex. He pulled his phone and texted her that he made it then waited.
"Hey," he grinned and regretted it because it made his head hurt more when his daughter ran up to him. He picked her up and hugged her tightly. "Hi," he put Sam down and turned to his ex-wife, placing his hand on her belly to feel their baby. "He wrestling in there yet?"
"Not so much action but he did wake me up a bunch of times last night," she sighed, pulling her car keys.
"Guess, he just wants attention," Jesse took his daughter's hand. "I'll get her back around 7," he nodded at Sam.
"I can drop you off by central back," she offered.
"What about your plans?" he asked.
"I'm already late," she sighed.
"I'm sorry," he apologized for ruining her plans.
"Central park is on my way," she shrugged.
"I'll drive," he extended his hand for her to give him the keys.
Beca was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling. She did a little work, looked up bars that have artists performing to scout some talent, (She really needed to sign someone good enough to save the branch.) then decided to take a break. She had a lot on her mind and working wasn't distracting her anymore. She glanced at her laptop hearing someone calling her on FaceTime. She smiled seeing that it was Chloe and reached for her laptop and answer the call.
"Beca!" Chloe beamed at her friend.
"Hey," Beca greeted, stretching the word as she rested her elbow on the bed to support her weight.
"How's New York treating you?" Chloe asked.
"New York is treating me fine," Beca shrugged. "How's L.A.?"
"Still the same," she answered her. "You know you've became a shitty friend, right?"
"What did I do?" Beca arched an eyebrow
"We don't talk anymore. I wanna be involved in my best friend's life even though you're in a different timezone."
"I'm really busy, that's all," Beca sat up and placed her laptop on her lap.
"Yeah, well, I miss you and I hate that I don't know what you're up to. You don't even tweet anymore."
"I miss you too. And, I'm really busy to use social media."
"Well, you're clearly not doing anything now since you're laying in bed."
"I was doing things before you called," Beca said then chuckled humorlessly at the look Chloe gave her. "I was working," she clarified.
"If you said you were with your boyfriend I would have forgave you for being a bad friend. Where is Jesse by the way?"
"I don't know," Beca shrugged. "And he's not my boyfriend anymore. We broke up."
"What happened?" Chloe frowned.
"I really don't wanna talk about it."
Chloe eyed her for a few seconds then sighed, "fine."
"How's Tom?" Beca asked.
"He's great. We've been talking about buying a house."
"That is awesome!"
"There's more," Chloe smiled.
"What?"
"We're thinking of starting of starting a family."
"Oh my god!"
"I know."
"Holy shit. You want to have a baby."
Chloe nodded.
"When did this happen? I mean this is great news but I'm pretty sure you said you're not in a hurry."
"Yeah, I said that 2 years ago when Tom and I had just gotten married."
"Hold on a second Chloe," Beca reached for her phone from the nightstand when it rang.
"What's wrong?" Chloe asked, noting the frown on Beca's face.
"Nothing," Beca said before answering the unknown number.
"Hello?" she said.
"Am I speaking to Beca Mitchell?"
"This is she."
"I'm nurse Stevens, calling from interfaith medical center. I'm calling to inform you that Mr. Swanson has been in a traffic collision..."
"Beca, What's wrong?" Chloe asked, seeing that her friend had a blank look on her face as she listened to the other person on the line.
"Chloe, I have to go," Beca said hanging up the phone. "Um, Jesse has been in an accident," she hopped off of the bed and grabbed her converse.
"They called from the hospital?"
"Yeah."
"Oh my god, what happened?"
"Apparently they got hit by a truck," Beca answered, grabbing her laptop.
"They?"
"Jesse was with his daughter and ex-wife— I have to go." Beca didn't wait to hear what Chloe had to say before she closed her laptop and raced out of her apartment.
She couldn't really focus on what the nurse was saying after the word traffic collision. She wasn't sure how she got to the hospital because her mind was going a mile a minute.
Rushing into the emergency room, Beca raced to the reception and asked about them. She ran to the room the nurse told her Jesse was at. A nurse was stitching his head and he was quietly staring into nothing with an odd look on his face.
As she waited for the nurse to finish redoing the stitches he got the night before, a doctor came in and filled her in on what had happened after she told him she's Jesse's girlfriend. He told her that a truck ran a light and Jesse didn't see it because he had a case of hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) due to the fact that he hadn't eaten anything for almost 24 hours and it made him light headed. Sam didn't get hurt thanks to being in strapped in her seat in the back seat of the car. Jesse had hurt his head again and had to redo the stitches: he didn't get hurt because the truck came from the right. He lucked out physically but Sandra didn't. The car ran into the passenger seat where she was seated causing her to have a miscarriage and dislocate her shoulder.
Beca went to take care of the paperwork for Jesse, Sandra and Sam when a couple of cops came to talk to Jesse and found that one of Sandra's friend, Mary, was already on it. Beca helped fill Jesse's paperwork then went to see Sandra before she took Jesse home. It took everything in her not cry at sight she found. Sandra had the same odd look Jesse had but unlike him she was silently crying.
Standing in front of the bed, Beca took a moment before she could talk, "I'm really sorry for your lost."
Sandra nodded at her words and continued to stare into nothing.
Beca didn't know what else to say so she walked out of the room. Sandra didn't really like her so she was sure her face wasn't something she'd want to see in a time like that. Mary told her that she had taken Sam away and that her boyfriend was babysitting her until her mother could see her so she took care of discharge paper for Jesse then made her way to his room to take him home. When she got there the cops had left.
"Jesse?" she called when she stood in front of him and he didn't acknowledge her. "C'mon, Jesse, I'm taking you home," she extended her hand. He took her hand and got up. She knew he was in shock and felt useless because she had no idea how to help.
Stepping inside his apartment, Jesse rested his hand on a wall then clenched his fist before he punched the wall.
"I'm so sorry Jesse," Beca said apologetically
"He's gone and it's my fault," he said, resting his head against the wall
"Jesse, it's not your fault," Beca grabbed his arm and turned him to face her.
"I was driving when I shouldn't have. I was late—If i had shown up on time, nothing would have happened. It's my fault."
Looking between his eyes and pouting lips, Beca thought of one way that could comfort him so she went for it.
She kissed him tenderly and he responded with hungrier kisses.
"Beca," he called between kisses and it sounded like a plea. She nodded and walked him to his bedroom and pulled away to lock the door then kicked off her converse. With what she had in mind, Bender getting jealous and barging in on them was a no-no. She wrapped an arm around his shoulder and unbuckled his belt then lowered his jeans. She was in sweatpants so it was quicker to get rid of them.
She sat him down then sat on his lap, pressing her lips against his. He was hurting both physically and emotionally and she wanted help ease the pain a little. She made out with him until she was wet enough to not hurt herself before she reached under his boxer briefs and freed his erection, stroking it, making sure he was ready too.
"Are still on birth control?" Jesse asked, resting his forehead against Beca's and making her humorlessly laugh before she nodded. "Are you sure about this?—I did kill my—" he didn't get to finish his phrase when Beca pressed her lips against his, kissing him passionately.
She got up, quickly, removing her panties while he kicked off his shoes, jeans and boxers then sat back on his lap, positioning herself from him and inhaling deeply as she lead him inside her. More than two months without action made it an overwhelming experience. She took a moment before they got into a rhyme, a slow one.
He tried to take off her t-shirt but she didn't let him. He wanted to help her get off. And even though she needed it she didn't let him. It was about him and helping him cope with what he was going through. She knew sex would comfort him so she gave it to him.
"Why?" he asked, frowning.
"This isn't about me," she answered.
Jesse placed his hands on her waist to keep her from moving as he held her gaze. "Either you let me help you get off or you literally get off of me right this second."
Instead of using words to answer, Beca took off her t-shirt and unhooked her bra. She wanted to comfort him and if giving in was going to help she wasn't going to oppose.
He took a few seconds, eyeing her before he held her up, removing himself from inside of her and leaving her feeling empty. Jesse laid her down on the bed then straightened up to take off his t-shirt, wincing as he threw it away. Beca frowned watching him swallow the pain then lean down, resting his elbows on the bed and positioning himself on top of her after he threw a bed sheet over them. She ran her fingers over his shoulder, noting the bruise that went from his shoulder to his chest and recognizing it as the bruise that the seat-belt caused when it pulled him back when the other car ran into them.
She leaned up, placing light kisses on the bruise, going down his chest. Jesse forcefully kissed her head then temple before finding her lips when she looked up. They kissed slowly yet passionately while he massaged her breasts before he pulled away and gave her breasts more attention. She felt bad because it felt good to have his hands and mouth on her while he was suffering. Hearing her sniff he looked up.
"You okay?" he asked, stroking her cheek. She nodded, wiping her cheek.
"Yeah, but you're not."
He gave her a very weak smile. "I'm enjoying this," he leaned up and kissed her deeply. "I really am," he placed a quick peck on her lips "Thank you for giving me yourself," nuzzled her cheek.
"Now let's get you off, shall we?" he asked, trying to come off as enthusiastic about it as he could but Beca could hear how much he was hurting.
He really knew how her body worked because she responded the simulations his fingers were doing without needing any direction from her and threw her over the edge. As she recovered from her orgasm, he started to place kisses, slowly, making, his way down to her nether region and taking his time before going down on her.
It took everything in her not to fist his hair and guide him when he took too long. She was helping him cope and if taking forever was comforting him she was ready to let him take as much time as he wanted.
The wait was worth it because the moment he start to go down on her, her eyes rolled back in pleasure as she clenched the bed sheet and curled her toes, trying hard to keep herself from rocking her hips. She was a little embarrassed by the noises she was making and hoped she wasn't loud enough for his neighbors to hear. That hope vanished the moment she cried out his name when he got her off for the second time.
She tasted herself when he crushed his lips against hers while she was still recovering, his kisses were slow and not demanding. She pulled out of the kiss and cupped his face, frowning at the look in his eyes. His eyes carried a lot remorse and it broke her heart to see him like that. She felt his throbbing erection against her thigh and took matter into her hands when he didn't make any move. She could see that he needed to be inside her yet didn't ask.
"Wait," he spoke softly when she reached for his erection. "Let me get a condom," he cleared his throat.
"Jesse, I'm on the pill," she reminded him.
"I'm not taking any risk. Trust me you don't want to risk me impregnating you."
"Jesse. I don't plan on getting pregnant any time soon and you know that. We can do without a condom," she brought him down to her. "You trust me, right?" she asked. He nodded rapidly.
"Good."
She felt weird about the whole conversation because he was really scared of knocking her up even though the chances of that happening were slim. She had been on the pill ever since she was 16 and had never skipped a day. She usually insisted her partner wore a condom so that she wouldn't have to clean up and of course to not risk catching an STD if it's a casual hook up.
She was fine cleaning up after sex with Jesse because he'd like it better condom-free like any other man walking the planet.
She pressed her lips against his, picking up where they left off, kissing him slowly while stroking his erection. He let out a grunt when she guided him inside of her. He began to thrust and increased his speed by how comfortable Beca looked. She had her legs wrapped around his hips, placing open-mouthed kisses along his neck whenever she could. "Jesse—" she called and didn't have a need to say anything else because he seemed to understand that she needed more and started to simulate her clit. Shortly after that she was chasing her third orgasm for the day. She couldn't help but grin when he placed a kiss on her cheek, forgetting for a second the reason they were having sex in the first place. Opening her eyes, she realized that he still hadn't come yet.
She sat up and rolled over him while he was still inside her. She couldn't figure out why he was keeping himself from coming. She started to roll her hips, forcing herself to not come. He sat up and rested his head against the headboard, closing his eyes.
"Jesse, let go," Beca breathlessly said and cupped his face. "Look at me when I'm talking to you," she brought his face to face her and felt a rush of tears in her eyes when she saw how hard he was trying not to break down.
"Let go," she told him, again. He inhaled deeply before laying her down and kissing her then rested his head in her neck and thrust in and out of her until she couldn't keep herself from coming for any longer before he came inside of her and burst into tears.
"It's okay," she stroked his hair while he sobbed into her neck. "It's okay," she repeated, tightly hugging him as she silently cried.
Jesse cried himself to sleep and Beca held him as he slept but was very uncomfortable and had to clean up so she slipped out of his hold when she was sure he was asleep.
She looked inside his closet hoping to find a pair of clean panties to wear because she was planing on showering and would rather not wear back her panties. She found all of her stuff that he hadn't sent to her yet put together in a drawer. She grabbed a towel and headed to the shower. Where she spend more time thinking than actually showering.
She knew where they stood: They weren't together. Sex didn't mean they were back together. They had sex because she wanted to comfort him and help him cope. He needed comfort and sex was how she could provide it for him.
They were fighting the night before. She was convinced that he was still pissed at her for everything and that the loss of his and Sandra's baby can't change it. She was there for him in a time of need and that was it.
She decided to make him something to eat and wait until he woke up before she would leave. Sneaking off would send the wrong message. Sneaking off would make it look like she really wanted him back and wasn't just doing him a favor which deep down she knew was true. She wanted him back but she fucked up and if they ever got back together it was going to take more than great sex.
She made him mac and cheese and left the plate in the microwave then fed Bender before taking a seat on the sofa. She grabbed the music sheet she found on the coffee table. At first glance she saw how the writing drastically changed from decent to barely readable. She guessed that he wrote it while drowning his sorrows and the empty beer cans surrounding her confirmed much. Humming the notes, she was amazed by how well Jesse could translate his feelings into his work because the piece felt aggressive at first then got bittersweet. It was a first draft and unfinished but was also powerful. He was really talented and deserved to get recognized for his talent.
"You like it?" Jesse asked, stepping out of his bedroom. His eyes were puffy, his hair was going into strange directions, and he was wearing a pair of boxers.
"I love it," she said, eyeing him after she put the sheet back where she found it. "And, I'd love to hear the finished product."
"I'll send it to you if I ever finish it," he rubbed his eyes.
"I made mac and cheese while you were asleep," Beca got up and stuffed her hands in her pockets. "It's in the microwave."
"Thanks," he thanked her then made his way to the kitchenette. "I don't mean to be rude but why are you still here?" he asked as he set the microwave to heat up the mac and cheese. "I didn't expect to find you, honestly," he pulled a beer from the fridge.
"It didn't feel right to leave and not say bye," she watched him bring the beer to his lips and refrained from telling how unhealthy it was to drink beer on an empty stomach.
"It felt right the last time?" he mumbled, placing the beer on the counter and shifting his attention to the microwave.
Beca bit back her reply because it would probably start a fight which neither of them needed. She watched him set the plate on the counter then turn to face her.
"Thank you," he thanked her. "You're truly an amazing friend that I'm glad I had the opportunity to have for a partner even it was just for a month. I don't think anyone would do what you did for me and I wish you'd find someone who'd deserve you and treat you right," he pulled her into a hug then placed a kiss on her damp hair. "I'll always be there for you if you need me. You're one of a kind and I'll never forget you because you'll always have a piece of my heart."
"Why are you saying all this?" Beca tsked, pulling away from his tight hug.
"I'm letting you go, Beca," he stepped back and eyed her as she tried to keep it together. "You deserve the best there is, not a man who caused the death of his own baby," he said sounding bitter at himself
"Jesse, we've been through this. A dick ran a light and hit you. You didn't cause Sandra's miscarriage, he did."
"It's fine if that's what you think," he looked away from her for a second.
"It's not a matter of what I think, it's a fact."
"Beca, I think you should leave," he cleared his throat.
Beca eyed him for a while and realized that being so slow and taking an awful lot of time with foreplay was his way of saying goodbye.
"Well, at least one of us got closure," she said, cupping his face and bringing his lips to hers, kissing him as if her life was depending on it.
Pulling away, she didn't wait a second before she paced to the front door.