Chapter Fourteen

When they landed at the Shrine, all was in chaos. Venus was down. That was the first thing Pluto noticed. Uranus and Neptune went to her at once, while Maker went to back up Mercury, Saturn to Jupiter, Fighter to Mars.

The world was overwhelming after so long away. The colours, the smells, the noise. The violence. Sometimes it was so very hard to live in the world. But Pluto knew, she could feel, that she'd been right to come back.

No one else could fix this.

She placed her hand on Sailor Moon's shoulder. "Sailor Moon, Small Lady – Lend the others your strength. Help them to keep fighting. Remedying this…Imbalance; that is my task."

"No," said Sailor Moon, her eyes anxious. "Not by yourself. Protecting the world is my responsibility…"

Pluto smiled reassuringly. "By helping the others, you will be."

She looked up at the sky. The vast beautiful sky. Pluto had almost forgotten the way it could lift her heart. Skies did not exist at the Doors to let the spirit soar. She looked further, higher. Right up into the atmosphere. The edges of the world were not resting where they should be. There was the other Earth, just slightly above them, spinning on oblivious as to what it had lost. That world and this one, they had to be reunited before the monsters down here succeeded in destroying all of them.

Letting out a steadying breath Pluto took flight, flew up and up until she reached the curve of the stratosphere and hooked the key of her Rod right onto the edge of the planet. The other reality was so close, just a few inches away. Pluto could touch it with her fingertips, but it cost every ounce of strength she had to fly with the weight of the world behind her.

In those few painful inches as she flew, Pluto saw so much, so many different realities and possibilities flashing by, things even the Doors had never shown her. She was seeing time from within the world instead of outside of it, feeling it flow and change around her, feeling herself change with it. In the ten years Pluto had spent living as Meioh Setsuna, there was a part of herself she'd always tried to hold back, watching as Sailor Pluto would watch from the Doors, reminding herself she didn't really belong.

But despite that, this life had changed her more than she'd realised. And while not the cause, Taiki was certainly a consequence of that. Pluto had tried to turn her back on those changes in herself, but it hadn't worked. All she'd done was build a cage that hurt herself and everyone around her.

The two Earths were back in sync now, occupying the same area of space, but their realities hadn't reconnected. Pluto felt a moment of panic as she looked down, so far down, to where her friends were struggling with the monsters. What else did she have to do?

Energy. Her body had the energy of a thousand years spent at the Doors of Time, and her Rod was the object that could channel it. Without hesitation she began. The pain began first like a prickling in her veins, but soon enough it was like there was a lightning storm in her blood, and if anyone had been close enough, they would have heard her screams as she trembled on the verge of sky and space, seen her growing pale as death as she poured her powers into the Earth.

Pluto knew she was turning back into stardust again. Her left foot was gone, along with two fingers on her right hand. The tips of her hair were glowing ominously and her skirt began to disappear as the magic of her uniform failed.

It was getting difficult to breathe. But it didn't matter. She felt the world click back into place and the monsters were sealed, sent through the Doors into oblivion. The people she loved would prevail, and one day surely they would find the way to Babylon, even if she wasn't there to see it.

Pluto floated, half of her still senshi and half of her melted into stars, becoming a celestial body drifting further and further into space, losing her mind.

With what little consciousness she had left, she wondered where she'd gone wrong. Why hadn't she seen that saving Kinmoku would cause this shift in Earth's reality? Why? How could she have failed in the very duty for which she'd left the Earth?

Her perceptions were fading, but as she felt her body disappear, as her mind drifted further and further away, Pluto realised that if she followed that tenuous thread, if she let everything go, she could see further than she ever had before, a million dazzling lives spinning past her. Just as Neptune had said, Pluto had set herself upon a new path, one that she'd chosen for herself. And then she'd doubted and turned away, going back to the ways of a dead world.

And that dead world had listened to her. Pluto was older than the others, closer to what all of them had been long ago in that hazy time of myth when the senshi of this solar system first came to be.

When all they were was duty, fealty, service. When, as harsh as it was, there had been a kind of logic to it, for the battles that were fought back then at the birth of the universe were brutal and ugly and steeped in chaos, and any senshi who forgot her place for even a moment was in danger of falling into the dark.

The faintest memory, rekindled into life; the conflict bringing chaos, and Chaos taking its chance. Pluto had been bound at the Doors by the ancient senshi chains awakened by her own guilt, and Chaos had moved on the Earth, seeking to destroy its guardian warriors. Even as she was dying, Pluto laughed. It was a weak plan that had never had a hope of succeeding. Not against her. She, who wielded the powers of time and perception. Who had spent a thousand years steeped in the magic of the Doors, who would do anything to ensure the lives of her friends.

Earth and Kinmoku, they would both survive; Pluto could see their shining futures stretching off into infinity. Babylon would come again, the ancient city rising from the sands of the desert and flowering anew. The others would find their way. They'd build the future she'd always seen but never belonged to.

"You've failed," she whispered to the forces of Chaos ever seeking to destroy. "You'll always fail. We will never stop protecting this world…"

The Garnet Rod fell from Pluto's disintegrating hand, and she closed her eyes with a soft exhalation of breath. Time would have no guardian anymore.

#

At the Shrine, the senshi who moments before had been locked in battle with an overwhelming tide of monsters, found their opponents suddenly vanished. Jupiter lost her balance and toppled over. Mercury immediately got out her visor and computer and started making furious calculations. Mars and Fighter still kept Moon behind them, wary, but Mars' gaze strayed to where Uranus had taken the opportunity to kneel down by the stricken Venus, while Neptune kept watch nearby.

Mars saw Neptune's face crumple a moment before she felt the same certainty hit her, low in her gut where her most powerful intuitions always originated. Pluto was dead. Rather, she was dying; Mars could feel her fading away like blood flowing from a wound on her own body.

She saw Uranus raise her head, perhaps also beginning to sense Pluto's death, or maybe only sensing there was something wrong with her partner.

"Neptune?" said Uranus. "What is it? Is it—"

One by one, the others were starting to realise. Mars could see the pain hitting each of them in turn, as they felt that Pluto was no longer with them.

"It's Pluto," Neptune whispered, speaking more to Uranus than anyone else.

Maker looked towards the sky, the stark loss on her face making Mars' own heart ache harder. "She's gone."

Mars felt Fighter start and draw in a sharp breath beside her. She could feel her anxiety for Maker's wellbeing, and their reactions made Mars wonder whether Venus had been right in her suspicions of Maker and Pluto developing feelings for each other.

Each soldier stood, still, silent, ignoring the world Pluto had just spent her blood saving; frozen in shock and incomprehension.

Then Saturn's screams rent the air, desperate denials clawing out of her throat to be spilled fruitlessly at the feet of an unchanging fate. Chibiusa reached her first, followed shortly by Uranus and Neptune. Mars caught Jupiter's eye and wordlessly asked her to take her place by Usagi's side, while she herself went to Venus.

The wound was worse than Mars had realised, a nasty gash across Venus's chest that had already soaked most of the front of her uniform in blood.

"You're so careless," she griped tightly, smoothing Venus's sweat-soaked fringe out of her eyes.

Venus's eyes fluttered open, amusement lurking beneath the pain. "Glad to see you care, Mars," she said weakly.

Mars snorted and flushed. "Stop wasting your strength and be quiet." She shifted to make room as Mercury joined them and helped her bind the wound with the surgical kit she mysteriously produced from somewhere. If Mars pretended hard, she could almost convince herself that tending to Venus was making listening to Saturn's grief less terrible.

"Saturn," she heard Moon say, "It's okay. I'll get Pluto back. If I follow her up—"

Uranus responded immediately, expression set in that way that meant she was about to enforce something that was the very last thing she wanted, because she thought it was the right thing to do. "You can't, Usagi. It's too dangerous. We have no idea what that would do to you, or the world."

"No; I won't give up! I'm not losing anyone today. I swore I wasn't going to—"

"Princess," said Uranus, her voice lowering into that soft, intimate tone she never used with any of the others, "it was Pluto's choice. Don't take that away. Just let her…Let her rest."

"Sailor Moon," Mercury interjected, drawing the Princess's attention, "Venus needs your help. Now."

All of them watched the struggle on their Princess's face as she tried, and failed, to find a way to make sure everyone was saved. With a last look towards the sky, and tears streaming from her eyes, she acknowledged Mercury with a defeated nod and turned towards those she could still help.

And the world went on, oblivious that it had ever been lost.

#

Miserable March crept in redolent with rain. It had been three days since the battle. Other than Minako, none of them had sustained serious injuries, and Haruka's gut twisted a little in wry humour to think that had to be considered a good outcome.

The Inner Senshi, Usagi, Mamoru and the Starlights were still staying at the Shrine, but Haruka, Michiru, Hotaru and Chibiusa had elected to return to the Outer Residence. None of them knew how to handle the current situation. They would sit at the kitchen table pale as ghosts with untouched steaming mugs of tea, not meeting each other's eyes; sometimes someone would say something, some reminiscence of Setsuna, and Haruka had heard that was supposed to help, but in this case it only made things worse. Whoever spoke would have too much pain in their voice, and the memories hurt more than they comforted.

The night before, Haruka hadn't been able to sleep. She'd slipped out of bed and gone back to the caves, looking for something, anything to destroy, even though she knew very well there wasn't a shadow of darkness left.

Transformed into Uranus, she'd wandered deeper and deeper underground, the silent emptiness of each chamber she entered increasing her frustration until she let out a sob and slammed her fist into one of the cave walls, cracking it all the way to the ceiling.

That was when Neptune found her, as she was hunched with her fists pressed to the slimy wall, her forehead resting on her forearms, her chest heaving with her dry, retching sobs.

Two arms encircled her waist; Neptune's warmth was at her back. Her voice muffled by Haruka's skin, she said, "I'm a little offended you'd choose to spend the night in a dark, nasty cave, rather than with me."

Haruka gave an unsteady laugh. "I was looking for a fight."

"You didn't have enough of that at the Shrine?"

"I was looking for a fight I could win."

She felt Michiru's fingers slide comfortingly into her hair. "We don't know for sure Setsuna is dead, Haruka."

"Hotaru and Chibiusa went to the Doors and they couldn't find her. You can't see any glimpse of her in your Mirror. What else could have happened to her?"

Michiru's breath huffed onto the nape of Haruka's neck. "We don't even know how she sealed the monsters and brought the world back. We don't know anything."

"She must have known though, Michiru. That doing whatever she did would have a cost attached to it. And she hid it from all of us so no one else would pay it too."

"I know."

Haruka turned. "How can you be so calm?!"

Pain flashed across Michiru's face. "I hate this as much as you do, Haruka. But…Hotaru said when she and Chibiusa went to visit Pluto at the Doors, she looked, well, her exact words were, 'she looked like she'd been in pain for so long she'd stopped remembering there was any other way to be'. And, as much as I don't want to lose Setsuna – or Pluto – I'd prefer to think she chose an end where she could finally get some kind of peace. Maybe she wanted that, instead of being trapped in the same cycle again. As much as it hurts, I can't begrudge her that. It's better than before, when she left us for the Doors."

Closing her eyes, Haruka sighed, and felt very tired. She knew Michiru was right.

Opening her eyes again, she considered her partner in the faint luminescence their bodies seemed capable of producing in their senshi form. It was Michiru's birthday in four days. As a surprise, Haruka had bought her a painting she'd always wanted – one that had been in a private collection for years but had been put up for sale a few months before. In fact, Haruka had found out about the intended sale and bought the painting almost before it came onto the market, and subsequently had to endure Michiru's disappointment once she found out the painting was already gone. Haruka had enjoyably been anticipating Michiru's surprise when she realised the painting was hers after all, and now here she was, reduced to gleaning comfort from their friend's possible death.

Haruka couldn't give her the painting in a few days' time; both of them would always remember it as the painting that arrived with Setsuna's death. Nothing expensive or unique would work. Maybe Haruka could get her a new set of violin strings; something small and practical. Something that wouldn't last.

Wrapping Michiru in a tight hug, she whispered, "I still wish Setsuna could have had a better ending. A happy ending. I thought she'd realise she made a mistake in leaving; that she'd come back…"

Drawing back, Michiru gave Haruka a sad smile. "Setsuna did come back, Haruka. She just couldn't stay."

"What do you think will happen to Kinmoku? Setsuna said the Crystal was broken, that the planet was going to be destroyed. Do you think there's any hope for them?"

The lightless depths of the ocean moved in Michiru's eyes. "It's always a struggle, to keep hope alive…"

The pained defeat in her voice was still echoing discomfortingly in Haruka's mind as she went to answer a tentative knock at the door the next day. It was Usagi of course, standing on the front step with rain streaming off her umbrella and sadness etched into her features.

She nervously bit her lip, perhaps expecting to be turned away. "Haruka, I know none of you probably want to see me right now, but…"

"It's okay, Princess," said Haruka, pulling the door back and standing out of the way. "You can come in."

Leaving Usagi's umbrella to drip in the hall, Haruka led her into the lounge where Michiru was sitting looking wan, her legs tucked under her and a book in her lap she clearly wasn't reading.

"Usagi." Michiru made an effort to acknowledge her cordially, though she didn't move.

"Michiru…Haruka…" Appearing to be at a loss as to what to do, Usagi finally sat down after standing aimlessly for a few moments. "Are Chibiusa and Hotaru here?"

"They're upstairs in Hotaru's room," said Haruka. "I could…Go get them?" she made the statement into a question, not relishing the thought of disturbing her daughter's privacy.

Usagi hesitated before nodding. "Please. I've barely seen Chibiusa at all…"

Haruka nodded back and went upstairs. She knocked quietly on Hotaru's door. "Hotaru? Chibiusa?"

There was a rustling that sounded like bedclothes on the other side of the door, and then it cracked open to reveal a rather tired and annoyed Chibiusa. "Haruka!" she hissed, "Hotaru has been crying all night, and I've only just gotten her to go to sleep. Did you really have to disturb us?"

"Is she still asleep?" Haruka said, being sure to keep her voice low.

Chibiusa checked behind her. "Yes."

"Then you can leave her. But your future mother is downstairs, and she wants to talk to you."

With a sigh, Chibiusa came out of Hotaru's room and clicked the door closed softly. "Fine," she said, flouncing past Haruka and preceding her down the stairs. Her grief was poorly concealed behind her brazen exterior; diamond tears glittered in the corners of her eyes and she was pale with the effort of holding them back.

Michiru had apparently gotten up to make tea for everyone, since there was a tea tray with several cups sitting on the coffee table when Haruka returned to the lounge. Usagi placed her teacup back in its saucer as soon as she saw Chibiusa, her eyes brimming.

"Chibiusa…" she whispered.

Chibiusa nearly cracked, but quickly covered the slip by throwing herself down onto one of the couches, exclaiming too loudly, "you didn't need to come, Usagi. I'm fine. Everyone here is fine. Pluto did her duty. That's all anyone cares about isn't it? That's all—That's all Pluto thought about. Her duty. She didn't even say goodbye. She didn't think about any of us."

"You know that's not true," said Usagi, her expression stricken. Haruka knew she understood as well as anyone why Chibiusa was reacting this way; how deeply she must be feeling as if she'd been abandoned, but that didn't mean it didn't still hurt her to hear Chibiusa speak like that. "Setsuna gave her life because she loved us. If there'd been another way, she would have taken it, I'm sure. If I'd known what she was going to do, I would have…I should have…I should have done something." Usagi glanced up sorrowfully at all of them. "I'm sorry. I failed. I failed everyone."

She sniffed and lowered her head, hands tight in her lap. Her shoulders shook, and soon she was sobbing. "I wanted to save everyone. I thought I could. Why? Why did it have to turn out like this?"

Rubbing a hand across her eyes, Usagi visibly fought to regain control of herself. "I'm sorry," she said again. "This isn't about me, I know."

Haruka hadn't been able to bring herself to sit down yet; she was still hovering, like she was waiting for something to happen, a battle maybe that would allow her to fix this unfixable emotional mess. She was always better with an enemy to fight, with something to do. She wanted to pretend there was still something she could do, instead of being helpless.

Michiru shifted from her own seat and moved to sit beside Usagi, taking her hand. "Usagi. We needed you and Chibiusa on the ground that day. The monsters would have overwhelmed us without both of you there. Setsuna would have known that. She never would have chosen to save herself and leave us in danger. That's not who she was."

"You're right, Michiru-mama. That's not who she was." None of them had noticed Hotaru's quiet arrival until she spoke. She moved further into the room and cleaved to Haruka's side for a moment, the way she used to as a little girl when she wanted to be comforted from a nightmare.

Thin and miserable, Chibiusa's voice floated into the silence. "But Puu was my best friend. What am I supposed to do now?"

Hotaru's arms tightened around Haruka for a moment before she loosened her hold and went to sit beside Chibiusa on the couch. Drawing Chibiusa closer until she was resting against her, Hotaru said sadly, "All we can do is remember Pluto…And let her go."

"Let her go?" said Usagi sharply. "But…Michiru, didn't you say that not even death could hold Pluto forever?"

Michiru nodded, looking tired. "Yes, I did say that. And I meant it. But Pluto had been alive for a very long time, Usagi. If she decides not to come back this time, we have to accept that."

Usagi tossed her head, pouting like the fourteen year old she'd once been. "I don't want to accept that at all."

"That's selfish, Princess," Haruka admonished, though she was aware her own feelings were much the same. "You should do it…For Pluto's sake."

Speaking so softly Haruka almost couldn't hear her over the rain, Usagi replied, "Setsuna always wanted to protect all of us. To make sure we had a future. But this…Isn't the future I wanted. If it's going to cost me the people I love, why would I want Crystal Tokyo at all? It's meant to be an era when the world finally comes back into balance again, but how can that happen if we're incomplete?"

"Pluto knew better than anyone that the future was always changing," Michiru said. "And she also knew that sometimes, no matter how much we might wish otherwise, some things can't be changed. Right now, I don't even know if we can say which of those situations we're in."

Sitting up straighter, Usagi seemed suddenly comforted by Michiru's words. "Taiki…She lost her powers when Setsuna left, didn't she? But she got them back again at the Doors…The power of Making…"

Haruka didn't really see what she was getting at. "Well, I think we can all be glad about that, Princess, but why bring it up? What does it have to do with our situation?"

Usagi smiled. "The whole universe is connected, Haruka. I think Setsuna – Sailor Pluto – knew that too."

"She did know that," said Michiru, her voice full of melancholy. "I just wish she'd realised more often that it meant she was connected too."

For a moment, it seemed like Usagi might be about to speak again, but instead she gave herself a little shake and started on a different track. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't be here making you all take care of me like this. That's not why I came. I…Have a message from Seiya, actually. She asked me to deliver it for her."

Bristling from habit, Haruka crossed her arms. "Go on."

"Yaten is doing better today, so the three of them are going back to their flat. Despite what Setsuna said, they don't want to give up. They want to stay here and carry on with their search for the Crystal."

"That's fine," said Haruka stiffly. "I have no objections. I'm sure Michiru doesn't either."

Michiru murmured her agreement, but Haruka saw something flicker through her eyes. They still didn't know whether Setsuna's intervention on Kinmoku was what had caused the catastrophe on Earth; and whether Earth's subsequent restoration had doomed Kinmoku again. Or what effect finding and restoring the Crystal might have on Earth's future, if indeed there was some link between the planets.

It was something Haruka and Michiru would have to investigate quietly, away from Usagi's eyes, but in the meantime, they couldn't disallow the Starlights from their search when they'd so recently risked their lives in battle to save the Earth.

"I knew you'd agree," said Usagi, smiling in relief and unaware of the silent communication passing between Haruka and Michiru.

"If Puu…" Chibiusa swallowed and closed her eyes for a moment, a spasm of pain passing across her face. "If she's really not coming back, I'll make sure to keep an eye on the Doors when I return to the thirtieth century, along with Diana and Hotaru. Someone…Someone will have to do that now."

"We'll see Setsuna again," Usagi repeated with conviction. "She's out there somewhere, and when she's ready, she'll find her way back to us."

Hotaru took Chibiusa's hand. Haruka and Michiru didn't meet Usagi's eyes. Outside, the rain continued to fall.